Do you have adblock enabled?
 
If you can read this, either the style sheet didn't load or you have an older browser that doesn't support style sheets. Try clearing your browser cache and refreshing the page.

(The New York Times)   Meet the home-loan crisis's younger sister, Sallie. She's in college   (nytimes.com ) divider line
    More: Scary, federal student loans, birth order, state education, discretionary income, accounts receivable, management consults, mortgages, credit monitoring  
•       •       •

19342 clicks; posted to Main » on 10 Sep 2012 at 3:03 PM (3 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



Voting Results (Funniest)
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest

2012-09-10 01:57:04 PM  
7 votes:
Dropped out of potty training.. now make $2B a day. I pay a barracks full of destitute immigrant women a pittance to become pregnant so they can serve their fetuses to me for dinner. Suckers.
2012-09-10 01:52:31 PM  
7 votes:
Made it through three hours of the first day of preschool. Flipped over my little kid-sized desk, told that teachin lady to fark off, and now I am literally Willard Mitt Romney.
2012-09-10 01:36:13 PM  
7 votes:
Dropped out of kindergarten.. now make $30M a month, Mitt Romney shines my shoes for tips while I pilot my own Gulfstream V, and I always wear jeans with a sportcoat. Suckers.
2012-09-10 12:30:15 PM  
7 votes:

i2.photobucket.com

2012-09-10 01:26:03 PM  
6 votes:
Dropped out of middle school... now keep a Poor in my bathroom who gets paid minimum wage for licking my butthole clean. Suckers.
2012-09-10 01:09:45 PM  
6 votes:

basemetal: [i2.photobucket.com image 509x417]


That girl has a real future in calligraphy- look at how consistent her letters are.
2012-09-10 02:02:20 PM  
5 votes:
I dropped out of Sesame Street - I can't read. I accrued a $7B net worth making the sorts of products that help people who can't read - lots of picture driven stuff. I patented rounded corners, because these types of people are the kind who hurt themselves on 90 degree angles. Then I got cancer a couple times. It didn't end well.
2012-09-10 02:00:51 PM  
4 votes:
Failed abortion... now write blog articles for Townhall.
2012-09-10 03:37:58 PM  
3 votes:
Dropped out of mom, now I have a successful reality show with my 18 brothers and sisters
2012-09-10 02:50:36 PM  
3 votes:

mysticcat: I'm seeing a trend here:
[i.imgur.com image 340x561]


"I'm in collections, and I am a Phoenix." Probably wouldn't make a good commercial.
2012-09-10 06:52:51 PM  
2 votes:

Relatively Obscure: Dropped out of potty training.. now make $2B a day. I pay a barracks full of destitute immigrant women a pittance to become pregnant so they can serve their fetuses to me for dinner. Suckers.


Dropped out of my mom's vagina, head first, right on the floor. My right eye is normal, my left eye looks like a frowning geisha girl. It's a perfect 45-degree angle from my jaw to the crown of my head. The kids in gradeschool used to hold me down on the ground during recess, and use my head for a bicycle ramp. I now make $3b a day at a GM Plant as a human protractor.
2012-09-10 03:32:52 PM  
2 votes:
Why don't these dumbasses just sell some of their stock ?
2012-09-10 01:31:29 PM  
2 votes:
Listen, the student loan crisis IS THE REASON I have my government mandated Obama hobo. Do you realize how helpful he's been around the house? And all I have to do is give him a pack of beef jerky and a bottle of Thunderbird 3-4 times a week and he's happy.
2012-09-10 01:12:30 PM  
2 votes:

King Something: make me some tea: basemetal: [i2.photobucket.com image 509x417]

*facepalm*


That pic is faker than Olympic boxing officiating. Just look at the artifacts around the letters, their alignment compared to the cardboard they're "written" upon, and the fact that the letters which show up more than once - the lower-case a, i and g, for instance - are "written" exactly the same each instance they appear.


You can tell just by looking at the pixels, and you've seen a few 'shops in your time...

/Kidding. Looks fake to me, too.
2012-09-10 01:12:15 PM  
2 votes:

King Something: make me some tea: basemetal: [i2.photobucket.com image 509x417]

*facepalm*


That pic is faker than Olympic boxing officiating. Just look at the artifacts around the letters, their alignment compared to the cardboard they're "written" upon, and the fact that the letters which show up more than once - the lower-case a, i and g, for instance - are "written" exactly the same each instance they appear.


That's some fine pixel spotting there, Earl. I bet you score big on all those "Spot the Differences" photo quizes. *facepalm"
2012-09-10 01:08:44 PM  
2 votes:

make me some tea: basemetal: [i2.photobucket.com image 509x417]

*facepalm*



That pic is faker than Olympic boxing officiating. Just look at the artifacts around the letters, their alignment compared to the cardboard they're "written" upon, and the fact that the letters which show up more than once - the lower-case a, i and g, for instance - are "written" exactly the same each instance they appear.
2012-09-10 12:51:35 PM  
2 votes:
Look, Sallie is just stripping so she can afford her psych text books.

once she has enough money, she'll concentrate on her studies.
2012-09-10 08:47:26 PM  
1 vote:
Hmmmm, let's see:

1. Borrow north of $100,000;

2. Graduate into a no--job economy;

3. Work at Mickey D's for $8 per hour;

4. Get harassed at work by debt collectors until you lose your job;

5. Go on Welfare.

That about get it?
2012-09-10 08:37:09 PM  
1 vote:

PsiChick: Name one famous woman pre-America who isn't Joan of Arc. Without Google.


Eve

s3.amazonaws.com
2012-09-10 07:40:08 PM  
1 vote:
I find it ironic that people who were taught to count by Sesame Street puppets and are rabid fanbois of animated shows think Liberal Arts degrees are worthless.
2012-09-10 07:01:05 PM  
1 vote:

make me some tea: basemetal: [i2.photobucket.com image 509x417]

*facepalm*


that's a shop you tard
2012-09-10 06:23:26 PM  
1 vote:

Bondith: has always been confused as to what "pennies on the dollar" means, 'cause it seems to change depending on context


Oh PENNIES on the dollar. I've been doing it wrong. I thought it was penis on the dollar.
2012-09-10 05:33:32 PM  
1 vote:
FTA: Lindsay Franke, of Naugatuck, Conn., is among the borrowers taking advantage of income-based repayment. While her monthly payment is now lower, Ms. Franke, who is 28 and has a master's degree in business administration from Albertus Magnus College, said the program had not changed a crushing reality: she still owes too much money and makes too little to pay it off. A marketing coordinator for a law firm, she filed for bankruptcy last year because she could not afford her mortgage, car payment and student loans. She lost the house, but still owes $115,000 in student loans, both private and federal. Under income-based repayment, she pays $325 a month on her federal loans; she also pays $250 a month on her private loans.

"I will never have my head above water," Ms. Franke said.


A masters degree in business administration and she can't maintain her own finances? Wow.

That said, I think students would probably stop racking up all the student loan debt if more employers stopped requiring a bachelor's degree to run a cash register, stock shelves, etc.
2012-09-10 05:13:44 PM  
1 vote:
F**k it. Just bundle them all into leveraged instruments, rate them AAA, and sell those suckers off. What could possibly go wrong?
2012-09-10 04:59:53 PM  
1 vote:

KiplingKat872: I will say that the University I work for is seeing more students going into the hard sciences than ever before. I work for the chemistry department and the number of chem majors have skyrocketed over the last three years.


Do you need more instructors?
2012-09-10 04:41:23 PM  
1 vote:
Mister Kiwi and I have this discussion all the time. His ex wife spent 30K on a BA not even in her field, because it made her "feel like an adult". He dropped out of high school and makes half again more than her, working twenty hours a week.

She fumes because I don't have a BA, and I'm thirteen years younger than her and make the same amount.

College isn't everything. Having skills is more important.
2012-09-10 04:21:25 PM  
1 vote:
In an attempt to recover money on the defaulted loans, the Education Department paid more than $1.4 billion last fiscal year to collection agencies and other groups to hunt down defaulters.

I think I may have found your problem...
2012-09-10 04:08:10 PM  
1 vote:

BigJake: lmao you're paying money to go to a place called "Frostburg State"


Hey buddy, I'm not happy about it either.
2012-09-10 04:01:35 PM  
1 vote:
Hiding from the government is not easy.
"I keep changing my phone number," said Amanda Cordeiro, 29, from Clermont, Fla., who dropped out of college in 2010 and has fielded as many as seven calls a day from debt collectors trying to recover her $55,000 in overdue loans.

Yeah, especially when you publish her name, age and town.

2012-09-10 04:00:15 PM  
1 vote:
I dropped out of a broad your God had sex with. I am your man God. Legions of my followers give all they have to me. Bow, and seek my approval, suckers.
2012-09-10 03:59:04 PM  
1 vote:

Gaboo: Amanda Cordeiro of Clermont, Fla., owes $55,000 in student loans. She has changed her phone number about four times in a year to avoid being found.

But somehow, she was able to afford popping out a kid and an SUV with all leather interior.


That must have hurt.
2012-09-10 03:46:53 PM  
1 vote:

Mr. Eugenides: When I got my student loan some decades ago, the bank who made the loan wanted to know the school I was going to, my major and GPA.

The for profit schools aren't the problem here, the idiots making bad loans are. The problem is a government that federalized student loans and gives deadbeats money to go to crap schools for crap majors.


The government federalized those loans in 1965, old timer. I'm glad Ye Olde Banke gave you a loan in the 1950s, but the world has moved on since then.
2012-09-10 03:46:06 PM  
1 vote:
Am I still in time for the STEM circlejerk? I need to bash a few liberal arts majors to make myself feel better about not having fun in college.
2012-09-10 03:44:37 PM  
1 vote:

netcentric: But somehow, she was able to afford popping out a kid and an SUV with all leather interior.

Wait.....what?


Just don't order the clearcoat...
2012-09-10 03:40:39 PM  
1 vote:

Gaboo: Amanda Cordeiro of Clermont, Fla., owes $55,000 in student loans. She has changed her phone number about four times in a year to avoid being found.

But somehow, she was able to afford popping out a kid and an SUV with all leather interior.


Wait.....what?
2012-09-10 03:37:48 PM  
1 vote:

Tat'dGreaser: Out of all the things to be outraged over, I can't seem to find the outrage for this. I was even laid off in 2009 right after I graduated in May 2008. Still found a way to make my payment, if I couldn't at all I called them and they worked something out for that month.

After all said and done, I wish I went to a trade school instead.


There's this.

I'm looking at almost $270K in loans by the time I'm done--it's a horrible thing to think of. I need to make $2500 a month just to pay my loans, nevermind what I need to live on. It's tough finding a $5000/mo. job in this economy. However, Sallie Mae has--so far--been pretty reasonable about working with me, once we got those asinine robocalls sorted out. My biggest problem right now is that my mom is a co-signer and I don't want them going after her. If I could get a bank loan to pay off Sallie Mae and hold the entire debt myself, I would.

Still, there was a period when Sallie Mae wasn't quite so reasonable. I'm not sure if it was just the one office, but in the late 80's/early 90's, I had a smaller loan that I hadn't paid, and they called me to collect. When I said I couldn't pay it off in full and could I arrange a payment plan, the woman was all "No, sorry, you had your chance. We want it in full!" I said, I couldn't pay it, so they were getting nothing, and they didn't until about 10 years later. Weirdest thing I ever encountered. I heard from someone else right here on Fark they had a similar experience around the same time. "We want it all and we won't take part of it!" just doesn't make any sense to me, and still doesn't.

You should of course try to make arrangements you can afford and it's on the borrower to find out about deferred payments, offsets and other options. But it should be on Sallie Mae not to be so weird about taking whatever money they can get.
2012-09-10 03:19:23 PM  
1 vote:

xynix: Dropped out of college.. now make $300k a year. Suckers.


Ha, I love seeing shiat like this. Good for you! I mean us. Good for us. I too dropped out of college because instead of perusing that piece of paper, I recognized there was money to be made.
2012-09-10 03:15:41 PM  
1 vote:

Jackson Herring: Made it through three hours of the first day of preschool. Flipped over my little kid-sized desk, told that teachin lady to fark off, and now I am literally Willard Mitt Romney.


I was raised in a shoe, LITERALLY bootstrapped my way to the moon, and now I hunt and kill ice dragons with my bare hands for sport.

You tell that to kids today, they don't believe you.
2012-09-10 03:09:35 PM  
1 vote:
These people should have listened to Mitt Romney, and borrowed from their parents instead... What? Not everyone's parents have $80,000 to loan their kids? No matter, poor people don't vote anyway...

/Thanks for the degree, Navy!
2012-09-10 03:07:13 PM  
1 vote:
LUG: lesbian liquidity until graduation
2012-09-10 03:07:06 PM  
1 vote:
Sallie? Is she hot?
2012-09-10 02:45:31 PM  
1 vote:

Headso: mysticcat: I'm seeing a trend here:
[i.imgur.com image 340x561]

just of out curiosity I looked at their enrollment numbers, and wikipedia says University of Phoenix had like 600,000 people in 2010 and ITT tech has 80,000... those numbers put those default rates in better perspective.


Oh you people! With your "math" and "facts" and such! I need a villain!
2012-09-10 02:41:26 PM  
1 vote:

mysticcat: I'm seeing a trend here:
[i.imgur.com image 340x561]


just of out curiosity I looked at their enrollment numbers, and wikipedia says University of Phoenix had like 600,000 people in 2010 and ITT tech has 80,000... those numbers put those default rates in better perspective.
2012-09-10 02:09:53 PM  
1 vote:

make me some tea: basemetal: [i2.photobucket.com image 509x417]

*facepalm*


It's all about the arrows, tea, and it worked.
2012-09-10 02:06:30 PM  
1 vote:

what_now: sweetmelissa31: Dropped out of middle school... now keep a Poor in my bathroom who gets paid minimum wage for licking my butthole clean. Suckers.

You pay him? I thought he did that for free?


Well there's some exchange of services involved
2012-09-10 02:02:37 PM  
1 vote:
You guys bought what with your billions you earned by dropping out?
HAHAHA suckers!

/scrubbing and rinsing, scrubbing and rinsing, scrubbing and rinsing
2012-09-10 01:58:41 PM  
1 vote:

what_now: sweetmelissa31: Something needs to be done about for-profit colleges. They account for 50% of defaults and only 10% of all colleges, plus their graduation rate is only 20%. Government loans should not be going to these colleges.

This right here.


While for-profit colleges are the majority of the problem, $40,000 a year tuition at private colleges and spiraling public college costs are a problem as well.
2012-09-10 01:57:52 PM  
1 vote:

sweetmelissa31: Dropped out of middle school... now keep a Poor in my bathroom who gets paid minimum wage for licking my butthole clean. Suckers.


You pay him? I thought he did that for free?
2012-09-10 01:30:38 PM  
1 vote:

sigdiamond2000: TheDumbBlonde: sigdiamond2000: Dancin_In_Anson: But it seemed like such a good idea at the time!

That puppeteering guild might be the most stinging indictment of Occupy Wall Street yet.

At one of Arts and Culture's meetings-held adjacent to 60 Wall Street, at a quieter public-private indoor park that's also the atrium of Deutsche Bank-it dawned on Joe: "I have to build as many giant puppets as I can to help this thing out-people love puppets!"

Jesus.

Your tax dollars are re-investing in the puppetry arts. People love puppets.

I found a picture of the puppetmaster in question:

[img833.imageshack.us image 640x480]

Man, to have a talent like that go to waste...

What a tragedy.


Well, I feel better about my investment in the arts, and you should too.
2012-09-10 01:27:01 PM  
1 vote:

TheDumbBlonde: sigdiamond2000: Dancin_In_Anson: But it seemed like such a good idea at the time!

That puppeteering guild might be the most stinging indictment of Occupy Wall Street yet.

At one of Arts and Culture's meetings-held adjacent to 60 Wall Street, at a quieter public-private indoor park that's also the atrium of Deutsche Bank-it dawned on Joe: "I have to build as many giant puppets as I can to help this thing out-people love puppets!"

Jesus.

Your tax dollars are re-investing in the puppetry arts. People love puppets.


I found a picture of the puppetmaster in question:

img833.imageshack.us

Man, to have a talent like that go to waste...

What a tragedy.
2012-09-10 01:22:06 PM  
1 vote:
Dropped out of college.. now make $300k a year. Suckers.
2012-09-10 01:08:30 PM  
1 vote:

sigdiamond2000: Dancin_In_Anson: But it seemed like such a good idea at the time!

That puppeteering guild might be the most stinging indictment of Occupy Wall Street yet.

At one of Arts and Culture's meetings-held adjacent to 60 Wall Street, at a quieter public-private indoor park that's also the atrium of Deutsche Bank-it dawned on Joe: "I have to build as many giant puppets as I can to help this thing out-people love puppets!"

Jesus.


Your tax dollars are re-investing in the puppetry arts. People love puppets.
2012-09-10 01:04:46 PM  
1 vote:
No problems, I studied German as my language requirement in my undergrad. I hear their economy is doing well.
2012-09-10 01:00:37 PM  
1 vote:

Dancin_In_Anson: But it seemed like such a good idea at the time!


That puppeteering guild might be the most stinging indictment of Occupy Wall Street yet.

At one of Arts and Culture's meetings-held adjacent to 60 Wall Street, at a quieter public-private indoor park that's also the atrium of Deutsche Bank-it dawned on Joe: "I have to build as many giant puppets as I can to help this thing out-people love puppets!"

Jesus.
2012-09-10 12:43:34 PM  
1 vote:
What until the non-funded pension plans hit the pan.
2012-09-10 12:38:33 PM  
1 vote:
2012-09-10 12:26:45 PM  
1 vote:
Something needs to be done about for-profit colleges. They account for 50% of defaults and only 10% of all colleges, plus their graduation rate is only 20%. Government loans should not be going to these colleges.
 
Displayed 57 of 57 comments

View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest

This thread is archived, and closed to new comments.

Continue Farking
Submit a Link »
On Twitter






In Other Media


  1. Links are submitted by members of the Fark community.

  2. When community members submit a link, they also write a custom headline for the story.

  3. Other Farkers comment on the links. This is the number of comments. Click here to read them.

  4. Click here to submit a link.

Report