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(ABC)   Studio offers pole dancing classes to kids as young as five. What could possibly go wrong?   (abcnews.go.com) divider line 74
    More: Stupid, pole dancing, for kids  
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3339 clicks; posted to Main » on 10 Sep 2012 at 2:11 AM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



74 Comments   (+0 »)
   
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2012-09-09 11:53:51 PM
Nothing, really.
 
2012-09-10 12:00:28 AM
They don't get fat? Throw me a bone here.
 
2012-09-10 12:07:27 AM
Pole dancing is just a sideways version of the gymnastics bars we already have in playgrounds. (at least in good playgrounds) Who cares?

Worst case scenario, they pull a shoulder out.
 
2012-09-10 12:44:03 AM
They develop core and leg strength and suddenly have the ability to kick subby's ass?
 
2012-09-10 02:12:40 AM
Shame on you subby for sexualizing pole dancing, a wholesome physical activity and great workout.
 
2012-09-10 02:13:27 AM
You gotta train 'em young, man.
 
2012-09-10 02:18:05 AM
Chris Rock will not be happy with a few young girls fathers... He might even think of them as failures.
 
2012-09-10 02:18:40 AM
Sprains, broken/fractured bones, torn ligaments, ruptured muscles - the same as any other dance form really. As with any form of physical activity, make certain the instructor is well-trained and shows obvious concern for the welfare of their students.
 
2012-09-10 02:19:45 AM
aww, so cute of them trying to be like the "professionals."

I'm predicting pole dancing would soon be a legitimate sporting event....
 
2012-09-10 02:22:12 AM
24.media.tumblr.com
 
2012-09-10 02:22:46 AM

BarkingUnicorn: Nothing, really.


Done in 1
 
2012-09-10 02:24:01 AM
Man, the strength and control it takes to do that stuff well... I wish I was that strong. My wife is into this, and having seen some of the things they do, I have nothing but respect for these athletes. Seriously, if you doubt the athleticism necessary to do this, check out some of the GUYS that are making the professional scene. They make gymnasts look like basketball players.
 
2012-09-10 02:24:07 AM

jprogram: aww, so cute of them trying to be like the "professionals."

I'm predicting pole dancing would soon be a legitimate sporting event....


A dancing pole is just more boring gymnastics equipment.

A stripper pole isn't for dancing so much as preventing faceplants while gyrating on stilts and high as a kite.

Kind of like how a knife is a tool in a kitchen, but a weapon in an airport.
 
2012-09-10 02:25:03 AM
Hula hooping and jump roping could be considered erotic when done by the right individuals, that doesn't mean it necessarily makes it erotic when everybody does it.
 
2012-09-10 02:28:42 AM
I heard this on my local station a few days ago. The expert on said pole exercise has been used in Chinese circuses for years and I believe she said it is part of some dancing in India as well. It is a tool, nothing else, that has been stigmatized because of the exotic dancing industry using it.

//all about context
 
2012-09-10 02:30:33 AM
"[Pole dancing] is a very hot trend. It's fun and sexy and very popular with housewives."

"Like the TV show?"

"No, actual housewives."

"Those still exist?"

"And they like to slide on poles."
 
2012-09-10 02:31:07 AM
I mean lets look at it this way wac.450f.edgecastcdn.net
OR

img src="http://funkydowntown.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/06/pole-dancing- in-train.jpg>
 
2012-09-10 02:33:07 AM

queezyweezel: They don't get fat? Throw me a bone here.


Just so long as nobody throws them one.
 
2012-09-10 02:47:33 AM
kids imitating strippers is a-ok.

kids imitating beauty pageant queens is not ok.

do i have that right
 
2012-09-10 02:50:45 AM

wookiee cookie: kids imitating strippers is a-ok.

kids imitating beauty pageant queens is not ok.

do i have that right


Strippers have a more steady income, and do wayyyy less cocaine.
 
2012-09-10 02:51:59 AM
As a fat aging middle age man, I should go enroll in this class.

After all the parents take their kids out immediately, mission accomplished!
 
2012-09-10 02:59:01 AM

delysid25: Hula hooping and jump roping could be considered erotic when done by the right individuals, that doesn't mean it necessarily makes it erotic when everybody does it.


Pole dancing may satisfy exhibitionist urges in some people. Strippers don't make money pole dancing. It's the lap dancing that makes them money and dehumanizes them.
 
2012-09-10 03:04:12 AM
Yes, we as a society are all for our little girls dry humping poles while putting on tons of make up and teeny tiny high heels. but if they do it in front of a judge, the mothers should be shot.
 
2012-09-10 03:05:08 AM
Those little girls will be empowered
 
2012-09-10 03:08:13 AM
Now, start adding pole-work to ballet and we have a legitimate art spoiled by horny men.

Ignore the logical fallacy, just smirk at the increased willing attendance by husbands.
 
2012-09-10 03:09:13 AM

wookiee cookie: kids imitating strippers is a-ok.

kids imitating beauty pageant queens is not ok.

do i have that right


Not quite. Kids on poles are just playing and exercising. Kids in beauty pageants are attention whores in training.
 
2012-09-10 03:13:04 AM
i.imgur.com
 
2012-09-10 03:14:01 AM
Penn State can follow this business model?
 
2012-09-10 03:18:48 AM
My landlord was going off about this the other day, as she was on her way to a chair dancing class....
Man, my town's been making the fark rounds a lot lately, time for a Victoria Fark party?!
 
2012-09-10 03:21:13 AM
i46.tinypic.com
 
2012-09-10 03:28:35 AM

BarkingUnicorn: wookiee cookie: kids imitating strippers is a-ok.

kids imitating beauty pageant queens is not ok.

do i have that right

Not quite. Kids on poles are just playing and exercising. Kids in beauty pageants are attention whores in training.


to them it's just playing and exercising. same with beauty pageants. playing and having a good time.

to adults, it's little kids imitating strippers. which is kinda creepy.

is this a-ok for boys too? i doubt it.

i like the tree-climbing excuse in tfa. i climbed a lot of trees as a kid. i did not gyrate or grind on them like a stripper.

and i like strippers. who doesn't. it's not kid play though.
 
2012-09-10 03:38:58 AM

wookiee cookie: BarkingUnicorn: wookiee cookie: kids imitating strippers is a-ok.

kids imitating beauty pageant queens is not ok.

do i have that right

Not quite. Kids on poles are just playing and exercising. Kids in beauty pageants are attention whores in training.

to them it's just playing and exercising. same with beauty pageants. playing and having a good time.

to adults, it's little kids imitating strippers. which is kinda creepy.

is this a-ok for boys too? i doubt it.

i like the tree-climbing excuse in tfa. i climbed a lot of trees as a kid. i did not gyrate or grind on them like a stripper.

and i like strippers. who doesn't. it's not kid play though.


Strippers.. Serious business?
 
ecl
2012-09-10 03:40:45 AM

wookiee cookie: BarkingUnicorn: wookiee cookie: kids imitating strippers is a-ok.

kids imitating beauty pageant queens is not ok.

do i have that right

Not quite. Kids on poles are just playing and exercising. Kids in beauty pageants are attention whores in training.

to them it's just playing and exercising. same with beauty pageants. playing and having a good time.

to adults, it's little kids imitating strippers. which is kinda creepy.

is this a-ok for boys too? i doubt it.

i like the tree-climbing excuse in tfa. i climbed a lot of trees as a kid. i did not gyrate or grind on them like a stripper.

and i like strippers. who doesn't. it's not kid play though.


You've only been half living then.
 
2012-09-10 03:41:04 AM

wookiee cookie: is this a-ok for boys too? i doubt it.


Are you joking?

If a 5 year old boy walked into his living room when the older female relatives, grandmas and such, were there and started doing a Chipendale's style dance it would be the funniest thing since sliced bread.

There might even be a depends moment right there on the couch.
 
2012-09-10 03:44:06 AM

Todd300: wookiee cookie: BarkingUnicorn: wookiee cookie: kids imitating strippers is a-ok.

kids imitating beauty pageant queens is not ok.

do i have that right

Not quite. Kids on poles are just playing and exercising. Kids in beauty pageants are attention whores in training.

to them it's just playing and exercising. same with beauty pageants. playing and having a good time.

to adults, it's little kids imitating strippers. which is kinda creepy.

is this a-ok for boys too? i doubt it.

i like the tree-climbing excuse in tfa. i climbed a lot of trees as a kid. i did not gyrate or grind on them like a stripper.

and i like strippers. who doesn't. it's not kid play though.

Strippers.. Serious business?


lol.

srrs as a heart attack.
 
2012-09-10 03:44:21 AM

Skwishmitten: Man, the strength and control it takes to do that stuff well... I wish I was that strong. My wife is into this, and having seen some of the things they do, I have nothing but respect for these athletes. Seriously, if you doubt the athleticism necessary to do this, check out some of the GUYS that are making the professional scene. They make gymnasts look like basketball players.


So you and I have your wife in common. That's about it tho. This is a weak atempt at atheletism. Fathers worldwide have failed. Send the wives to me.
 
2012-09-10 03:44:34 AM
5 year old stripper games are cool? I did not know the Honey Boo-Boo and Fark demographics overlapped so much.
 
2012-09-10 03:47:57 AM
Being naked is also a great way to stay cool during the summer while still making the parents retarded for letting their kids do it in public.
 
2012-09-10 03:51:12 AM
If you think pole dancing = only stripping, then you are not going to like this.

And you are also retarded.
 
2012-09-10 03:51:13 AM

doglover: wookiee cookie: is this a-ok for boys too? i doubt it.

Are you joking?

If a 5 year old boy walked into his living room when the older female relatives, grandmas and such, were there and started doing a Chipendale's style dance it would be the funniest thing since sliced bread.

There might even be a depends moment right there on the couch.


and what, the older male relatives politely escorted out of the room so gramma and aunt sophie can tuck dollar bills into little brayden's fruit-of-the-looms?

creepiest. xxxmas. evar.

/sliced bread ain't funny.
 
2012-09-10 03:58:55 AM
So what? Just think of it as early vocational training.

Face it, not all the gals are going to grow up to be veterinarians.
 
2012-09-10 04:00:16 AM

wookiee cookie: and what, the older male relatives politely escorted out of the room so gramma and aunt sophie can tuck dollar bills into little brayden's fruit-of-the-looms?


No. But have you actually heard any grandparents talk about their kids. Every single story is about the kids acting inappropriately for their age and embarrassing the parents.
 
2012-09-10 04:02:55 AM
Nah, not biting. Enough arguments as to why this is "good clean fun".

Instead, I'll wait for the next thread where our resident batshiats defend hooker clothing for six year olds using NRA-style arguments.
 
2012-09-10 04:15:01 AM
images.wikia.com
 
2012-09-10 04:23:11 AM
Five? Damn, they're starting them late.

www.parentfail.com
 
2012-09-10 04:35:57 AM

davidphogan: Penn State can follow this business model?


No, this is pole dancing. You're thinking of pole polishing.
 
2012-09-10 04:36:31 AM
leadcreatively.files.wordpress.com
 
2012-09-10 05:27:32 AM

jaytkay:


Selling snow shovels?
 
2012-09-10 05:50:04 AM
Poles dancing?
img411.imageshack.us
Well they need to pass the tradition on to a younger generation or it will become a lost art.
 
2012-09-10 06:28:43 AM
i.dailymail.co.uk
Pretty wrong, actually.
 
2012-09-10 06:32:10 AM
What could possibly go wrong?

Nothing. And yet, watch us find a way...
 
2012-09-10 06:55:18 AM
seems harmless
cobornsdelivers.files.wordpress.com
 
2012-09-10 07:49:59 AM
I don't know about teaching kids but the idea of attractive women taking these classes to try to arouse their Type A, closet gay, corporate executive husbands makes me sad.
 
2012-09-10 08:36:49 AM
i149.photobucket.com
 
2012-09-10 09:08:50 AM

hitlersbrain: I don't know about teaching kids but the idea of attractive women taking these classes to try to arouse their Type A, closet gay, corporate executive husbands makes me sad.


huh. It kinda works for me.
 
2012-09-10 09:10:48 AM
Many women think being a filth bucket is a vital part of being sexy, and girls look up to them. Works fine for me.
 
2012-09-10 09:34:26 AM
Hmmmm, chlamydia on a stick....hmmmmm
 
2012-09-10 09:38:47 AM

HotWingConspiracy: Many women think being a filth bucket...


..is something men want to stick it in?

Sorry, was just completing sentences again. That said, I'm not entirely sure how dancing in an erotic manner for your spouse or loved one in order to arouse them makes you "sad" or a "filth bucket".
 
2012-09-10 10:05:02 AM
Skill Mastery Takes 7 Years and 10,000 Hours.
 
2012-09-10 10:42:28 AM
Make it rain...

cdn.uberreview.com
 
2012-09-10 11:06:25 AM
cdn1.hark.com
Well, The world needs pole dancers, too!
 
2012-09-10 11:20:45 AM

SkunkWerks: HotWingConspiracy: Many women think being a filth bucket...

..is something men want to stick it in?

Sorry, was just completing sentences again. That said, I'm not entirely sure how dancing in an erotic manner for your spouse or loved one in order to arouse them makes you "sad" or a "filth bucket".


He has an issue with his issue.
 
2012-09-10 11:28:28 AM

Hawnkee: [i149.photobucket.com image 500x400]


Needs to be amended to have strippers, escorts and street walkers. All the essentials to modern life.
 
2012-09-10 11:35:27 AM

SkunkWerks: HotWingConspiracy: Many women think being a filth bucket...

..is something men want to stick it in?

Sorry, was just completing sentences again. That said, I'm not entirely sure how dancing in an erotic manner for your spouse or loved one in order to arouse them makes you "sad" or a "filth bucket".


I didn't say a filth bucket was a bad thing. Though teaching five year olds to do it is indeed sad.
 
2012-09-10 11:49:56 AM

nmemkha: [images.wikia.com image 300x300]


Came for this, obviously.
 
2012-09-10 12:51:59 PM

tafka: Sprains, broken/fractured bones, torn ligaments, ruptured muscles - the same as any other dance form really. As with any form of physical activity, make certain the instructor is well-trained and shows obvious concern for the welfare of their students.


I had the misfortune of watching some of those child dance reality shows. The level of self-absorption among both the mothers and the instructors is shocking, and all their hissy fits do is contribute to injuries that the children are then verbally abused for. It makes me weep for humanity, but I guess that's yuppies for you.
 
2012-09-10 01:11:20 PM

hitlersbrain: I don't know about teaching kids but the idea of attractive women taking these classes to try to arouse their Type A, closet gay, corporate executive husbands makes me sad.


closet gay? The women are just trying to fend off being left for actual strippers, or secretaries that give good head, or pretty much anyone younger and with less stretch marks with them. You don't see too many corporate executive support pools staffed entirely by well-manicured men with heaving biceps.
 
2012-09-10 01:45:57 PM

hitlersbrain: I don't know about teaching kids but the idea of attractive women taking these classes to try to arouse their Type A, closet gay, corporate executive husbands makes me sad.


Congrats - you are only slightly less intelligent than Hitler...I mean Hitler right now...at this instant.

Think about it on your way to the parole office - you'll get it sooner (or later...probably later).
 
2012-09-10 01:52:18 PM
Why all the outrage as no one ever heard of the uneven bars?
 
2012-09-10 03:20:09 PM

HotWingConspiracy: Though teaching five year olds to do it is indeed sad.


Why?
 
2012-09-10 03:28:07 PM
How soon until they catch someone with a hidden camera?

To which the question "was that wrong? Should I not have done that?" will be difficult to answer.
 
2012-09-10 03:53:20 PM

StoPPeRmobile: He has an issue with his issue.


But, what condition is his condition in?
 
2012-09-10 05:20:23 PM

SkunkWerks: HotWingConspiracy: Though teaching five year olds to do it is indeed sad.

Why?


Because 5 year olds have little use for "dancing in an erotic manner for your spouse or loved one in order to arouse them".
 
2012-09-10 10:46:57 PM
She's taking a realistic look at their future prospects and doing "Job training."

Now THATS an educator.
 
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