Do you have adblock enabled?
If you can read this, either the style sheet didn't load or you have an older browser that doesn't support style sheets. Try clearing your browser cache and refreshing the page.

(Grist)   Baby piranha rescued in Amazon River. DId I say baby piranha? I meant baby manatee. With bonus ugly-ass pictures for extra "awwww" goodness. Oh, the...nevermind   (grist.org) divider line 41
    More: Sappy, Amazon, Tempur-Pedic International Inc., McMansion  
•       •       •

11001 clicks; posted to Main » on 09 Sep 2012 at 4:34 PM (2 years ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



41 Comments   (+0 »)
   
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest

Archived thread
 
2012-09-09 03:20:36 PM  
www.gregorysweeney.com

"Gaze deeply into my eyes and succumb to this relentless adorability."
 
2012-09-09 03:33:10 PM  
Oh, the wee manatee
 
2012-09-09 03:44:35 PM  
But does it have free 2-day shipping?
 
2012-09-09 03:48:56 PM  
If a sea cow ever got the chance, he'd eat you and everyone you care about!
 
2012-09-09 04:37:02 PM  
DO WANT.
 
2012-09-09 04:48:09 PM  
This baby manatee is so cute we can't stand it? The writer sounds like that woman from Seinfeld 'why don't you come see the baby?!? The Baby!! THE BABY!!!!!!
 
2012-09-09 04:51:43 PM  
img37.imageshack.us
*hoooonk*
 
2012-09-09 04:51:51 PM  
That sea pig needs an education and a job. Its in the Amazon cause it don't got a job.

(If I could have any animal for an amazingly ridiculous pet, it would be a manatee)
 
2012-09-09 04:56:05 PM  
Milk goes where?
 
2012-09-09 05:01:55 PM  

BumpInTheNight: [img37.imageshack.us image 170x127]
*hoooonk*


But if I do that it's permanent brain damage.
 
2012-09-09 05:07:06 PM  

FloydA: If a sea cow ever got the chance, he'd eat you and everyone you care about!


i2.kym-cdn.com
 
2012-09-09 05:21:44 PM  
Joyce Kilmer. 1886-1918

Trees

I think that I shall never see
A poem lovely as a tree.

A tree whose hungry mouth is prest
Against the sweet earth's flowing breast;

A tree that looks at God all day,
And lifts her leafy arms to pray;

A tree that may in summer wear
A nest of robins in her hair;

Upon whose bosom snow has lain;
Who intimately lives with rain.

Poems are made by fools like me,
But only God can make a tree.
 
2012-09-09 05:27:19 PM  
Wee manatee? How the hell am I supposed to flog shirts now? Thanks for nothing subby.
 
2012-09-09 05:39:22 PM  
Val Kilmer. (Sucked as Batman.)

Manatees

I think that I would like to see
a great big farkin' manatee

A sea cow asking for no help
just floatin' round and eating kelp

A member of order: Sirenia
It has a vascularized cornea

Its habitat's estuarian
for osmoregulat-ian

If I could get it through my head
It's not a got dam pinneped

Poems lean and trim, you see
sea cows are fat and blubbery
 
2012-09-09 05:39:29 PM  
I want one. I'm going to adopt one, but it can stay in the ocean.
 
2012-09-09 06:02:48 PM  
He looks delicious.
 
2012-09-09 06:31:11 PM  

FloydA: Val Kilmer. (Sucked as Batman.)

Manatees

I think that I would like to see
a great big farkin' manatee

A sea cow asking for no help
just floatin' round and eating kelp

A member of order: Sirenia
It has a vascularized cornea

Its habitat's estuarian
for osmoregulat-ian

If I could get it through my head
It's not a got dam pinneped

Poems lean and trim, you see
sea cows are fat and blubbery


So as a poet laureate, you take after VAL Kilmer, is what you're saying? ;)
 
2012-09-09 06:41:58 PM  

Gyrfalcon:

So as a poet laureate, you take after VAL Kilmer, is what you're saying? ;)


Actually, I think of myself not so much as "Poet Laureate," but more as a "Poet Laurel&Hardyate." Not so much "Natasha Trethewey," my poetry is more "Nasty Throwitaway." More of a "Robert Slightly Chilly" or "Mybackis Aiken."

(Who would have expected a thread about a baby manatee to evolve into Poet Laureate puns? This is what makes Fark great! Cheers!)
 
2012-09-09 07:19:41 PM  
Okay, I'll bite.

farm1.staticflickr.com
 
2012-09-09 07:22:26 PM  

BumpInTheNight: *hoooonk*


Oh...OH...fark it.

*SQUEEEEEEE!!!!!I
 
2012-09-09 07:38:42 PM  
In viewing the photo up close... How do they pee?
img502.imageshack.us
 
2012-09-09 08:04:23 PM  
i hear they make great pets.
 
2012-09-09 08:11:09 PM  

wookiee cookie: i hear they make great pets.


Dammit! Now that song is in my head!
 
2012-09-09 08:37:22 PM  

EVERYBODY PANIC: In viewing the photo up close... How do they pee?
[img502.imageshack.us image 492x307]


They don't, that's how cute they are.
 
2012-09-09 08:49:03 PM  
At sea world long ago, I noted that walruses have almost human-like v-shaped pubes. Have not yet recovered.
 
2012-09-09 08:50:20 PM  
GET A JOB SEA COW
 
2012-09-09 08:56:47 PM  
It looks like a tiny Jake the Dog from Adventure Time.
 
2012-09-09 08:59:39 PM  

EVERYBODY PANIC: In viewing the photo up close... How do they pee?
[img502.imageshack.us image 492x307]


The same way other aquatic mammals do - they all have their genitals hidden by a slit on their underbelly for protection purposes.
 
2012-09-09 09:00:13 PM  

FloydA: Gyrfalcon:

So as a poet laureate, you take after VAL Kilmer, is what you're saying? ;)

Actually, I think of myself not so much as "Poet Laureate," but more as a "Poet Laurel&Hardyate." Not so much "Natasha Trethewey," my poetry is more "Nasty Throwitaway." More of a "Robert Slightly Chilly" or "Mybackis Aiken."

(Who would have expected a thread about a baby manatee to evolve into Poet Laureate puns? This is what makes Fark great! Cheers!)


Who would have expected anyone could even MAKE Poet Laureate puns.

+1 internet and a cookie.
 
2012-09-09 09:09:03 PM  
How I love doggerel verse!
Nothing I think of is ever worse.

Hallmark cards may weep in shame,
They have only Gryfalcon to blame.
 
2012-09-09 09:18:46 PM  

Rising_Zan_Samurai_Gunman: EVERYBODY PANIC: In viewing the photo up close... How do they pee?
[img502.imageshack.us image 492x307]

The same way other aquatic mammals do - they all have their genitals hidden by a slit on their underbelly for protection purposes.


Just like fat guys!
 
2012-09-09 09:22:24 PM  

Gyrfalcon:

Who would have expected anyone could even MAKE Poet Laureate puns.

+1 internet and a cookie.


YAY Cookie!


i105.photobucket.com

"What's in the box?"

"Coookieees!"
 
2012-09-09 09:41:08 PM  
"Hi everyone, you can call me the manatee!"

"Yeah right, sea cow"
 
2012-09-09 10:29:59 PM  

FloydA: Manatees

I think that I would like to see
a great big farkin' manatee


You are officially my favorite poet. Are you planning on having a reading tour?

/ can Christopher Walken do the reading? // you'll sit up front, sipping scotch, and occasionally bursting out in a glorious stream of profanity, only to smolder back into your drink, staring vacantly past the audience at ghosts of your past while the rest of us remain blissfully unaware /// the ghosts are Cosby reruns

It'll be fantastic.
 
2012-09-09 10:37:33 PM  
Oh the cute manatee.
 
2012-09-09 11:57:35 PM  
I like how this thread was categorized with random tags. "Sappy" and "Amazon" I can understand, but "Tempur-Pedic International Inc." and "McMansion"?

/subby
//first greenlit thread in over a year, w00t!
 
2012-09-10 12:46:46 AM  

LOTN: FloydA: Manatees

I think that I would like to see
a great big farkin' manatee

You are officially my favorite poet. Are you planning on having a reading tour?

/ can Christopher Walken do the reading? // you'll sit up front, sipping scotch, and occasionally bursting out in a glorious stream of profanity, only to smolder back into your drink, staring vacantly past the audience at ghosts of your past while the rest of us remain blissfully unaware /// the ghosts are Cosby reruns

It'll be fantastic.


This is not possible for one reason, and one reason alone- I drink Irish whiskey, not scotch.

Other than that, you're on! Walken would be the perfect reader for my writing.

I actually have published some of my poetry. It's all crap, of course, but that's no different>from any other poet. ;-)
 
2012-09-10 10:31:49 AM  
D'awww! What a cute little blorpy baby. Kinda reminds me of the fat McDonald's kid though...not cute.
 
2012-09-10 11:34:24 AM  
What an awwwsome creature.
 
2012-09-10 03:50:12 PM  
Ah, squee. (Spoken in Christopher Walken's voice.)
 
2012-09-10 05:13:02 PM  
i105.photobucket.com

I hid this adorable cry of "squee" up my ass for two years.
 
Displayed 41 of 41 comments

View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest


This thread is archived, and closed to new comments.

Continue Farking
Submit a Link »
Advertisement
On Twitter






In Other Media


  1. Links are submitted by members of the Fark community.

  2. When community members submit a link, they also write a custom headline for the story.

  3. Other Farkers comment on the links. This is the number of comments. Click here to read them.

  4. Click here to submit a link.

Report