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(With Leather)   American companies could lose $6.5 billion because of fantasy football, according to firm of Donkey Punchers, Cleveland Steamers and 69ers   (withleather.uproxx.com) divider line 102
    More: Asinine, Companies of the United States, Americans  
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4012 clicks; posted to Main » on 06 Sep 2012 at 6:33 PM (2 years ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2012-09-06 03:24:02 PM  
Let's say it was possible to completely eliminate that distraction and capitalize on the extra 6.5 billion dollars. Would the workers get that money? Or would it go towards quarterly dividend payments?

Because I'll only work harder for more money, but I'm crazy like that.
 
2012-09-06 03:31:29 PM  
Sort of NSFW animated gifs on the page, modmins.
 
2012-09-06 03:54:50 PM  
Ugh, this crap again?
 
Office workers have access to the Internet.  Cool.  They also have projects with deadlines.  Cool.  They take 30 minutes off to check their fantasy football team, they're going to make that 30 minutes up elsewhere.  Unless you're working boxes at a grocery store (I've done it), work is not a zero-sum game.  Its liquid.
 
If I did nothing, on the clock at the grocery store, for an hour (I've done it)... that's roughly 70 cases that didn't get worked.  The company I worked for lost that time and money.  Fine- quantify that.
 
If I'm working up TPS reports, you can't really measure it like that.  Especially since I'm probably on salary, not hourly.
 
2012-09-06 04:09:59 PM  
I get my work done on time, and I check my fantasy stuff too.

The company loses zero dollars.
 
2012-09-06 04:10:05 PM  

Fo Shiz: Sort of NSFW animated gifs on the page, modmins.


Wow. Those like, have nothing to do with the story. And there are a lot of them. And they're pretty big too.
 
2012-09-06 04:23:45 PM  

Somacandra: Fo Shiz: Sort of NSFW animated gifs on the page, modmins.

Wow. Those like, have nothing to do with the story. And there are a lot of them. And they're pretty big too.


And they're fantastic.
 
2012-09-06 04:26:14 PM  

Snarcoleptic_Hoosier: Let's say it was possible to completely eliminate that distraction and capitalize on the extra 6.5 billion dollars. Would the workers get that money? Or would it go towards quarterly dividend payments?

Because I'll only work harder for more money, but I'm crazy like that.


The workers already get the money. The workers are getting that money because their employers think some work is getting done. The work is not getting done, which is what Challenger is complaining about.
It's easy to dismiss this, but it does have an impact on the economy. Because some work is not getting done, employers do not have to hire anyone to fix whatever it is that otherwise would be screwed up. That keeps the unemployment rate artificially high.
 
2012-09-06 05:12:16 PM  
.....and The Fear Boners.
 
2012-09-06 05:19:51 PM  
I wonder how much Fark costs employers?
 
2012-09-06 05:23:45 PM  

meat0918: I wonder how much Fark costs employers?


nothing of value, that much is for sure.
 
2012-09-06 05:28:54 PM  
How much time was spent today by reactionary team owners that are scrambling to nab Ogletree???
HAHA,. a 3rd option WR, and 4th option target when Witten is healthy.."GOTTA HAVE HIM!!"
 
2012-09-06 05:32:42 PM  

The_Sponge: .....and The Fear Boners.


I'm as excited for the start of The League as I am for the start of the actual football season. I love that show so much

/SHIVAKOMEINI SOMACANDACRUM!!
 
2012-09-06 05:50:47 PM  
Can anyone read lips? What's Wilde saying in that gif?
 
2012-09-06 05:51:21 PM  

downstairs: work is not a zero-sum game. Its liquid.


I wish it was beer
 
2012-09-06 06:12:15 PM  

scottydoesntknow: The_Sponge: .....and The Fear Boners.

I'm as excited for the start of The League as I am for the start of the actual football season. I love that show so much

/SHIVAKOMEINI SOMACANDACRUM!!



1) Ditto.

2) Speaking of Shiva...she's on HBO's "True Blood", and she had a few nude scenes.
 
2012-09-06 06:35:53 PM  
Oh, a fantasy football thread on the main page.

This will go over well.
 
2012-09-06 06:39:37 PM  
I am farking and working at the same time...can you believe that? I'm currently querying my database, it's taking a long time, should I be paying more attention to the progress meter?
 
2012-09-06 06:39:48 PM  
1) i can make up numbers too
2) i don't play fantasy, find it boring, but to each their own
3) i do play in a bad quarterback league. i heart cheering for failure
 
2012-09-06 06:40:13 PM  

Snarcoleptic_Hoosier: Let's say it was possible to completely eliminate that distraction and capitalize on the extra 6.5 billion dollars. Would the workers get that money? Or would it go towards quarterly dividend payments?

Because I'll only work harder for more money, but I'm crazy like that.


And you will always be passed over for promotion.

I also like your sense of entitlement 'I will only stop goofing off on the job if I get paid more'
 
2012-09-06 06:41:44 PM  
Any good FF team names out there, I saw some good ones in the fark leagues

In honor of PSU, I'm "Back to the Showers" in one league
In honor of superheroes and their weaknesses, I'm "John Cena's Fat Bottom Girls" in another
 
2012-09-06 06:43:36 PM  
This is what I think of when I hear fantasy football:

gridironexperts.com 

/YMMV
 
2012-09-06 06:44:58 PM  
How did Subby know my team name?

/fantasy hockey is where it's at anyway
//except this year :(
 
2012-09-06 06:45:08 PM  
Man would walk on the moon one day if they would get off Fark and start focusing on their jobs.
 
2012-09-06 06:45:52 PM  
Son, we live in a world that has walls, and those walls have to be guarded by men with computers. Who's gonna do it? You? You, Lt. Weinburg? I have a greater responsibility than you could possibly fathom. You weep for Steve Jobs, and you curse Microsoft. You have that luxury. You have the luxury of not knowing what I know. That Samsungs death, while tragic, probably saved lives. And my existence, while grotesque and incomprehensible to you, saves lives. You don't want the truth because deep down in places you don't talk about at parties, you want me on that pc, you need me on that pc. We use words like honor, code, loyalty. We use these words as the backbone of a life spent defending something in the FFL. You use them as a punchline. I have neither the time nor the inclination to explain myself to a man who rises and sleeps under the blanket of the very internets that I provide, and then questions the manner in which I provide it. I would rather you just said thank you, and went on your way, Otherwise, I suggest you pick up a iPad, and stand a post. Either way, I don't give a damn what you think you are entitled to.
 
2012-09-06 06:46:59 PM  
Team Names this year are "Skittles: Taste DeWayne Bowe" and "Reggie Tongue my Marion Butts"
 
2012-09-06 06:47:08 PM  

impaler: Can anyone read lips? What's Wilde saying in that gif?


I never realized her boobs were big enough to be that jiggly.
(as nsfw as the article gifs)
 
2012-09-06 06:47:33 PM  

TheManofPA: Any good FF team names out there, I saw some good ones in the fark leagues


I have two teams this year, "Legitimate Roethlisberger" and "Wreck Of The Larry Fitzgerald".
 
2012-09-06 06:47:47 PM  

rumpelstiltskin: The workers are getting that money because their employers think some work is getting done.


The thing is, the work was likely never getting done. There's a certain amount of time pissed away at the office no matter what. So maybe the office drone is spending an extra 30 minutes on FF. I'll buy that. But I'd bet that most (if not all) of that time got cut out of that workers Fark/Digg/Reddit time that would have been taken out of the day anyway.
 
2012-09-06 06:48:55 PM  
This is just the big identifiable lump, surely American companies lose more to pocket handball every d-hey lookie those GIFs!
 
2012-09-06 06:50:05 PM  

Decillion: Man would walk on the moon one day if they would get off Fark and start focusing on their jobs.


I doubt it. People need a little time away from their work. I know I function a hell of a lot better when I take a minute or two every now and again and get away from what I'm doing (unless of course I'm in the middle of something, in which case I just don't shift away from it).
 
2012-09-06 06:51:10 PM  

Cyno01: impaler: Can anyone read lips? What's Wilde saying in that gif?

I never realized her boobs were big enough to be that jiggly.
(as nsfw as the article gifs)


They were big enough that I didn't recognize her until I saved the gif. Maybe they're new?
 
2012-09-06 06:51:26 PM  
I'm "Sean The Bounty Hunter" in one league, and "Your Dog Wants A Repeat" in the Fark league (it was Your Dog Wants A Title last year, but I won the title, so I needed to freshen up the name).
 
2012-09-06 06:57:47 PM  
Challenger, Gray and Christmas obviously have little real world experience. If you want to see money galore go down the drain across the country tell all who care that they cannot have their football fun time. in the weeks that follow the dollar amount of wanton destruction of private property, inventory and assets by disgruntled employees will surpass the wildest dreams.

seen similar happen many times. never piss on the little guys, their vengeance is mighty.
 
2012-09-06 06:58:01 PM  

TheManofPA: Any good FF team names out there, I saw some good ones in the fark leagues


I saw "Elite Beatdown Agents" in one league. I kinda like that. Also, "Things That Go Gronk in the Night."
 
2012-09-06 07:05:21 PM  

impaler: Can anyone read lips? What's Wilde saying in that gif?


You're welcome.
 
2012-09-06 07:07:31 PM  

The_Sponge: scottydoesntknow: The_Sponge: .....and The Fear Boners.

I'm as excited for the start of The League as I am for the start of the actual football season. I love that show so much

/SHIVAKOMEINI SOMACANDACRUM!!


1) Ditto.

2) Speaking of Shiva...she's on HBO's "True Blood", and she had a few nude scenes.


Seriously? Off to GIS... now.
 
2012-09-06 07:10:52 PM  

00batou: impaler: Can anyone read lips? What's Wilde saying in that gif?

You're welcome.


Wait, there's nudity on youtube now?
 
2012-09-06 07:12:18 PM  

impaler: Can anyone read lips? What's Wilde saying in that gif?


It's from the GQ comedy issue. I think she said something along the lines of "I'm Olivia Wilde. Welcome to the GQ comedy issue"

Link to intro video
 
2012-09-06 07:16:30 PM  
If only someone had written a book about bs numbers like this in the news. In fact, this exact subject, the amount of money lost in the workplace due to sporting events.
 
2012-09-06 07:16:39 PM  

TheManofPA: Any good FF team names out there, I saw some good ones in the fark leagues

In honor of PSU, I'm "Back to the Showers" in one league
In honor of superheroes and their weaknesses, I'm "John Cena's Fat Bottom Girls" in another


I've used "New Orly Taitz" and "Austin Collie me Maybe".
 
2012-09-06 07:18:56 PM  
I'm Thinking RBs and I Have Osi D are what I went with this year.
 
2012-09-06 07:23:05 PM  

Cyno01: I never realized her boobs were big enough to be that jiggly.


i.canvasugc.com
 
2012-09-06 07:24:03 PM  
What else takes employees' time everyday and doesn't contribute to company productivity? Pooping.

American companies could lose $6.5 billion $687BN due to employee bodily needs.
 
2012-09-06 07:24:29 PM  
Well, my RB got me 16 points last night, and my opponent upthread only got 6 out of the receiver she had last night, so I'm content with my team right now.

\ignoring that her QB had a career game...for now.
 
2012-09-06 07:31:13 PM  

bjorky: American companies could lose $6.5 billion $687BN due to employee bodily needs.


Do you WANT us all to be replaced by robots?
 
2012-09-06 07:31:35 PM  

bjorky: What else takes employees' time everyday and doesn't contribute to company productivity? Pooping.

American companies could lose $6.5 billion $687BN due to employee bodily needs.


Getting paid to poop is the most satisfying thing in my life.
 
2012-09-06 07:31:42 PM  
The firm of Favre, Favre and Moore Favre says the study was flawed by a lack of Favre in the NFL this year.
 
2012-09-06 07:32:26 PM  

TheManofPA: In honor of PSU, I'm "Back to the Showers" in one league


Hahaha I'm the "Second Milers" and my profile picture is that creepy smiling one of Sandusky.
 
2012-09-06 07:36:04 PM  

Noticeably F.A.T.: rumpelstiltskin: The workers are getting that money because their employers think some work is getting done.

The thing is, the work was likely never getting done. There's a certain amount of time pissed away at the office no matter what. So maybe the office drone is spending an extra 30 minutes on FF. I'll buy that. But I'd bet that most (if not all) of that time got cut out of that workers Fark/Digg/Reddit time that would have been taken out of the day anyway.


This. Especially when I'm in that testing phase, and my work goes: 5 minutes of compile, 10 minutes of run test, 5 minutes of (try to) fix stupid idiot problem last test revealed, repeat. So I'm only working for 5 minutes anyways, and I'm spending 15 minutes sitting there doing nothing, but still getting work done.
 
2012-09-06 07:39:56 PM  

rumpelstiltskin: The workers already get the money. The workers are getting that money because their employers think some work is getting done. The work is not getting done, which is what Challenger is complaining about. It's easy to dismiss this, but it does have an impact on the economy.


That's a pretty simplistic and narrow perspective of worker productivity. If you're talking about the Acme Widget Corp factory where Joe is making X widgets per day, and if not for wasting time on Fantasy Football, Joe could have made 1.2(X) widgets per day, and each widget produced brings $Y in revenues, then you could make a fairly accurate assessment of how much Joe's Fantasy Football is costing Acme Widget Corp.

But if we're talking about a white collar environment like Initech where there are multiple tasks with varying priorities, interdependence between employees within and across departments, and projects with flexible due dates, then it's much harder to calculate the true cost of Fantasy Football.

Because some work is not getting done, employers do not have to hire anyone to fix whatever it is that otherwise would be screwed up. That keeps the unemployment rate artificially high.

I... uhh... what?
 
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