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(WTOP)   Man rescues woman by pounding beaver with hard pole   (wtop.com) divider line 46
    More: Strange, rabies  
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6435 clicks; posted to Main » on 06 Sep 2012 at 9:00 AM (2 years ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



46 Comments   (+0 »)
   
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2012-09-06 09:01:20 AM  
i23.photobucket.com
 
2012-09-06 09:02:54 AM  
Rabies? How are they going to be able to tell if the woman is infected?

yes, I'm married
 
2012-09-06 09:04:03 AM  
well played, subby. i lolled.
 
2012-09-06 09:04:16 AM  
I lol'ed, Subby great headline
 
2012-09-06 09:06:41 AM  
Any creature, human or otherwise, that swims in Barcroft Lake is either nuts or rabid.
 
2012-09-06 09:07:08 AM  

peg_leg: Rabies? How are they going to be able to tell if the woman is infected?

yes, I'm married


Is she now calm, rational, low maintenance?
 
2012-09-06 09:09:13 AM  
cybergags.com
 
2012-09-06 09:12:20 AM  

HotIgneous Intruder: Any creature, human or otherwise, that swims in Barcroft Lake is either nuts or rabid.


FTFA: Lake Barcroft is a popular swimming and fishing area.

It can't be that bad, can it?

>looks on google earth

It's crowded suburbia, but that doesn't mean anything

>it's even got an official beach and roped off swimming area

I see no problem.
 
2012-09-06 09:13:36 AM  
Awesome headline subby! Would LOL again and recommend on Angie's List.

/Well Wally, if I know your father, he's out chasing Beaver.
//Father Loves Beaver!
///Yule love it!
 
2012-09-06 09:19:07 AM  
I think I've seen that movie.
 
2012-09-06 09:19:22 AM  
Why in the hell was an 83 year old woman out swimming in a pond? I hope that by the time I get to that age I have people around to take care of me. If she does have children or some sort of state appointed care giver, they need to be charged with neglect and elder abuse. If there's a silver lining to this story, I hope she at least gets placed in a state run care facility so she can live out her last few days comfortably.
 
2012-09-06 09:22:04 AM  
Wynona had a big brown beaver
She stroked it all the time
I gave it a pinch
Tickled its chin
And the bastard tried to bite.
 
2012-09-06 09:23:05 AM  
Thanks subby. That was just the chuckle I needed today.
 
2012-09-06 09:24:29 AM  
I didn't realize there was any other way.
 
2012-09-06 09:31:37 AM  
++1 " Police say the woman got to shore and a nearby witness stunned the beaver with a branch"
 
2012-09-06 09:32:16 AM  
erroraccessdenied.com

/freakin' beaver jamboree around here.
 
2012-09-06 09:32:48 AM  
That's three miles from my house! And last month a fox followed one of my neighbors as he was walking his dog.
 
2012-09-06 09:33:01 AM  
img267.imageshack.us 

/no photoshop skills
 
2012-09-06 09:35:38 AM  
I'd hit it too.
 
2012-09-06 09:37:00 AM  
Wow, I sure hope she didn't suffer a big gash, I coont imagine how painful that would be.
 
2012-09-06 09:38:06 AM  
I grew up a mile from there. This lake is fed exclusively by the rainwater that falls on neighborhoods inside the Beltway. Its pretty enough, and heading out on a pontoon boat or canoe is fine, but swim in it? That's Toxic Avenger crazy. And fishing in it? Eww.
 
2012-09-06 09:38:06 AM  

spentmiles: Why in the hell was an 83 year old woman out swimming in a pond? I hope that by the time I get to that age I have people around to take care of me. If she does have children or some sort of state appointed care giver, they need to be charged with neglect and elder abuse. If there's a silver lining to this story, I hope she at least gets placed in a state run care facility so she can live out her last few days comfortably.


Well, it's northern Virginia. The people there are innovators who don't run with the normal crowd. They're all very special and unique suburbanites who just don't toe the line of conformity. Some of them are even second and third generation government employees. They are mavericks. Don't do as they do, but merely admire their courage.
 
2012-09-06 09:41:44 AM  

spentmiles: Why in the hell was an 83 year old woman out swimming in a pond? I hope that by the time I get to that age I have people around to take care of me. If she does have children or some sort of state appointed care giver, they need to be charged with neglect and elder abuse. If there's a silver lining to this story, I hope she at least gets placed in a state run care facility so she can live out her last few days comfortably.


Assume you're trolling again, but she's actually a fairly well known and still active local realtor.
 
2012-09-06 09:43:21 AM  

Father_Jack: well played, subby. i lolled.

 
2012-09-06 09:50:21 AM  
HOTY candidate is what I'm sayin'.
 
2012-09-06 09:51:41 AM  
The lucky few stay spry into the 80s, I was out gambling with an 86 year old woman last month who could pass as someone in her late 60s. She was walking around with us youngsters for a good 2-3 hours no problem, I could see this broad floating around somewhere safely in a lake unassisted.

/"83 year old does a keg stand" on YouTube if you're bored
//don't judge me and my choice in GILF and GGILFS
 
2012-09-06 10:08:24 AM  

peg_leg: Rabies? How are they going to be able to tell if the woman is infected?

yes, I'm married


this should be 'Comment of the Year' imho
 
2012-09-06 10:11:43 AM  
Attacked by a rabid beaver and sustained "non-life-threatening injuries"? How is that possible?

Any injuries sustained in an attack by a rabid animal are by definition "life threatening". Attack by a rabid dog? Life-threatening! Attack by a rabid skunk? Life-threatening! Attack by a rabid bat? Life-threatening! Attack by a rabid field mouse? Life-threatening!

Get the picture, dopes?
 
2012-09-06 10:16:19 AM  
A reminder to always wear protection when with beavers.
 
2012-09-06 10:32:22 AM  
In northern Virginia, fur wears YOU!
 
2012-09-06 10:38:40 AM  
Was she gay?
 
2012-09-06 10:50:25 AM  
 
2012-09-06 10:59:31 AM  

Warthog: she's actually a fairly well known and still active local realtor.


Because in Nova, being well-known AND a realtor justifies the stupidest behavior.
 
2012-09-06 11:01:21 AM  

HotIgneous Intruder: Warthog: she's actually a fairly well known and still active local realtor.

Because in Nova, being well-known AND a realtor justifies the stupidest behavior.


Yeah! She should just sit quietly and wait for Death to overtake her like a normal person.
 
2012-09-06 11:03:02 AM  
....pounding beaver with hard wood, not hard pole.
 
2012-09-06 11:36:39 AM  
Could someone, please please, 'shop the classic "Jaws" movie poster with a giant beaver head replacing Bruce and change the wording to "Gnaws?" Pretty please?

I'd do it myself, but I don't dare Google "beaver" from work, even w/Safe Search on.

/subbette
 
2012-09-06 11:43:06 AM  
Kipling wrote a book about a boy raised by wolves in India.

He based it on a story he heard of a woman raised by beavers in North America.
 
2012-09-06 11:50:15 AM  
Beautiful headline! Could have worked in the woman getting all wet first. You know, for added raunchiness.
 
2012-09-06 11:53:03 AM  
This headline is why I love Fark. +1 subs.
 
2012-09-06 12:04:24 PM  

cherryl taggart: peg_leg: Rabies? How are they going to be able to tell if the woman is infected?

yes, I'm married

Is she now calm, rational, low maintenance?


My lawnmower is calm, rational, low maintenance. My wife....not so much
 
2012-09-06 12:31:47 PM  
i
 
2012-09-06 12:50:43 PM  
I think I've seen that movie.

Actually that is a recurring theme in most all my favorite movies
 
gja
2012-09-06 01:33:33 PM  
I saw the headline elsewhere first as "Woman attacked by rabid beaver" and thought...
"So, one of her friends snapped?"
 
2012-09-06 03:03:58 PM  

Jon iz teh kewl: i


No weigh.
 
2012-09-06 05:27:01 PM  
Mr North approves and has decided to make a big production based on the event.

upload.wikimedia.org
 
2012-09-06 05:40:40 PM  
Awesome, subby.
 
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