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(Kotaku)   The quest to put all the Super Mario games on one timeline   (kotaku.com) divider line 37
    More: Interesting, mario, Dr. Mario, Mario video games, video games, Princess Peach, Skyward Sword, SimCity, strategy guide  
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6728 clicks; posted to Geek » on 05 Sep 2012 at 5:00 PM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2012-09-05 01:53:48 PM
I'll assume it follows the Primer timeline

moviereviewwarehouse.files.wordpress.com
 
2012-09-05 02:25:44 PM
NERD!
 
2012-09-05 02:30:39 PM
Signs that you have too much goddamn time: retconning Mario.
 
2012-09-05 04:01:26 PM
Are there really people who haven't gotten enough Mario yet?
 
2012-09-05 05:06:11 PM
I couldn'ta done that, but I was nerdy enough to immediately think "Super Mario Bros 2 goes anywhere 'cause the whole game's a dream."
 
2012-09-05 05:06:18 PM
Why?
 
2012-09-05 05:08:02 PM
Then who was mushroom?
 
2012-09-05 05:09:50 PM

timharrod: I couldn'ta done that, but I was nerdy enough to immediately think "Super Mario Bros 2 goes anywhere 'cause the whole game's a dream."


upload.wikimedia.org
 
2012-09-05 05:12:00 PM

MoronLessOff: timharrod: I couldn'ta done that, but I was nerdy enough to immediately think "Super Mario Bros 2 goes anywhere 'cause the whole game's a dream."

[upload.wikimedia.org image 373x428]


Know 'bout that too.
 
2012-09-05 05:21:53 PM

Treygreen13: Why?


This.
 
2012-09-05 05:22:22 PM
I read halfway through that before realizing the only person who might be interested that I could talk to about this is my husband, and even he'd be saying, "This affects me how again?"

Thusly, time was wasted, but not as much as if I'd read the whole thing before reengaging my brain.
 
2012-09-05 05:30:38 PM

timharrod: I couldn'ta done that, but I was nerdy enough to immediately think "Super Mario Bros 2 goes anywhere 'cause the whole game's a dream."


Nah man. It's gotta happen earlier because he dreamed up shyguys, and those motherfarkers are everywhere.
 
2012-09-05 05:32:11 PM

Ed Finnerty: Are there really people who haven't gotten enough Mario yet?


Me. I buy Nintendo consoles pretty much just because of Mario.
 
2012-09-05 05:36:15 PM

Weigard: timharrod: I couldn'ta done that, but I was nerdy enough to immediately think "Super Mario Bros 2 goes anywhere 'cause the whole game's a dream."

Nah man. It's gotta happen earlier because he dreamed up shyguys, and those motherfarkers are everywhere.


Wouldn't that mean SMB2 goes later in the timeline?
 
2012-09-05 05:44:41 PM
The Official Zelda Timeline

So, the splits are: Puzzle, Dark, and Cartoony?
 
2012-09-05 05:47:01 PM
I like the dismissal of Smash Bros as something that couldn't have actually happened, but Mario's medical degree is just accepted as fact.
 
2012-09-05 05:50:34 PM

dj_spanmaster: The Official Zelda Timeline

So, the splits are: Puzzle, Dark, and Cartoony?


Obligatory:

i.imgur.com
 
2012-09-05 06:02:48 PM
If only Kotaku writers spent that much time trying to better understand the mechanics, systems, and aesthetics in Mario games. Or any games.
 
2012-09-05 06:02:49 PM

Ed Finnerty: Are there really people who haven't gotten enough Mario yet?


*raises hand*

Hey, what can I say? The games are consistently good-to-great, and often the only thing they have in common is the fact that they star a fat plumber wearing red and blue.
 
2012-09-05 06:05:24 PM
FTA:

One of the reasons it might seem preposterous to put Mario games in a timeline is because Mario games don't have much more of a storyline than Mario rescuing the princess in some weird land that has giant mushrooms and mean turtles. Another reason is that many other Mario games have even less story than that.

Oddly missing: It's a retarded idea.
 
2012-09-05 06:54:25 PM

dj_spanmaster: The Official Zelda Timeline

So, the splits are: Puzzle, Dark, and Cartoony?


FTFA:

... And though I (sort of) debated against it, a Mario Timeline thread was still created...

I foresee much pointless debating.

I think UberMario will get as far as causing numerous discrepancies and then eventually give up. I may sound negative, but I've had many experiences with obscure and improbable theories, in which, of course, that was the outcome.

This is my first and last post here.
-Phantom7, a Zelda timeline-maker


Sounds like dorky fun and then the Zelda guys come in and shiat all over everything.
 
2012-09-05 07:32:05 PM
First, we have to address this point: The platform games (SMB 1, 2, 3, SMW, Yoshi's Island, 64 / 64 DS, Sunshine, Yoshi's Story, Galaxy 1 and 2, New SMB / Wii / 2 / Wii-U, Super Mario Land 1 and 2), the RPGs (SMRPG, the Paper Mario trilogy, the Mario & Luigi trilogy), Super Princess Peach, Luigi's Mansion 1 and 2, and Yoshi's Safari are the ones in the offical timeline canon. The puzzle games, the party games, the sports games, the edutainment games, the Kart games, the Mario & Sonic games, and especially the CD-i game are not canon.

Next, the timeline is pretty much the sequential order of the games releases, with the exception of Yoshi's Island and Yoshi's Story, which take place before SMB. Simple and easy.
 
2012-09-05 07:45:21 PM

Keizer_Ghidorah: First, we have to address this point: The platform games (SMB 1, 2, 3, SMW, Yoshi's Island, 64 / 64 DS, Sunshine, Yoshi's Story, Galaxy 1 and 2, New SMB / Wii / 2 / Wii-U, Super Mario Land 1 and 2), the RPGs (SMRPG, the Paper Mario trilogy, the Mario & Luigi trilogy), Super Princess Peach, Luigi's Mansion 1 and 2, and Yoshi's Safari are the ones in the offical timeline canon. The puzzle games, the party games, the sports games, the edutainment games, the Kart games, the Mario & Sonic games, and especially the CD-i game are not canon.

Next, the timeline is pretty much the sequential order of the games releases, with the exception of Yoshi's Island and Yoshi's Story, which take place before SMB. Simple and easy.


That is a fine starting premise.
 
2012-09-05 07:48:48 PM

Rev.K: FTA:

One of the reasons it might seem preposterous to put Mario games in a timeline is because Mario games don't have much more of a storyline than Mario rescuing the princess in some weird land that has giant mushrooms and mean turtles. Another reason is that many other Mario games have even less story than that.

Oddly missing: It's a retarded idea.


Well, good thing that's settled then.
 
2012-09-05 09:13:56 PM

dj_spanmaster: The Official Zelda Timeline

So, the splits are: Puzzle, Dark, and Cartoony?



This I have a problem with:
and the Wind Waker split is Link defeating Ganon and branching from his older years.

There is no evidence for this
 
2012-09-05 10:16:50 PM

timharrod: I couldn'ta done that, but I was nerdy enough to immediately think "Super Mario Bros 2 goes anywhere 'cause the whole game's a dream."


It has to go near the end. He encountered Shy Guys as a baby, Bob-ombs in SMB3 and Pokeys and Ninji in Super Mario World. It's more likely that he encountered them before he icorporated them into his dream world.

I still prefer to think of the Zelda games as a retelling of the same story rather than fiting into one convoluted if/then timeline. Much in the same way that every society has its own creation mythos or your uncles all have a different version of the way your dad fell out of the boat when they went fishing. Afterall, it says "Legend" right there in the name.
 
2012-09-05 10:29:40 PM

Britney Spear's Speculum: dj_spanmaster: The Official Zelda Timeline

So, the splits are: Puzzle, Dark, and Cartoony?


This I have a problem with:
and the Wind Waker split is Link defeating Ganon and branching from his older years.

There is no evidence for this


Wasn't there backstory in the Windwaker, talking about the Hero of Time failing, and that's what caused the world to flood?
I guess it could have been some other Hero of Time, but
 
2012-09-06 12:29:19 AM

Fano: Keizer_Ghidorah: First, we have to address this point: The platform games (SMB 1, 2, 3, SMW, Yoshi's Island, 64 / 64 DS, Sunshine, Yoshi's Story, Galaxy 1 and 2, New SMB / Wii / 2 / Wii-U, Super Mario Land 1 and 2), the RPGs (SMRPG, the Paper Mario trilogy, the Mario & Luigi trilogy), Super Princess Peach, Luigi's Mansion 1 and 2, and Yoshi's Safari are the ones in the offical timeline canon. The puzzle games, the party games, the sports games, the edutainment games, the Kart games, the Mario & Sonic games, and especially the CD-i game are not canon.

Next, the timeline is pretty much the sequential order of the games releases, with the exception of Yoshi's Island and Yoshi's Story, which take place before SMB. Simple and easy.

That is a fine starting premise.


Since Doki Doki Panic took place inside a magic storybook, one can theorize that Mario had read the book before going to sleep, and had a legit adventure there, with the Shyguys, Sniffits, and others either coming from, or written into, the book. If you want to go that way.
 
2012-09-06 01:30:17 AM
Someone somewhere actually gives half a shiat about this. I hope I never have to meet them and have them talk my ear off about it.
 
2012-09-06 03:18:29 AM

serial_crusher: Britney Spear's Speculum: dj_spanmaster: The Official Zelda Timeline

So, the splits are: Puzzle, Dark, and Cartoony?


This I have a problem with:
and the Wind Waker split is Link defeating Ganon and branching from his older years.

There is no evidence for this

Wasn't there backstory in the Windwaker, talking about the Hero of Time failing, and that's what caused the world to flood?
I guess it could have been some other Hero of Time, but


Something along those lines. Here's the Wind Waker intro. Notice that it talks about the Hero of Time "[w]ielding the blade of evil's bane." So it has to be talking about Adult Link.
 
2012-09-06 03:44:28 AM
i.qkme.me
 
2012-09-06 03:52:55 AM
*Eyes glaze over*
 
2012-09-06 06:36:38 AM
Where is Mario Paint on the timeline?
 
2012-09-06 08:24:59 AM
Asperger's is a helluva syndrome.
 
2012-09-06 09:05:21 AM

Britney Spear's Speculum: dj_spanmaster: The Official Zelda Timeline

So, the splits are: Puzzle, Dark, and Cartoony?


This I have a problem with:
and the Wind Waker split is Link defeating Ganon and branching from his older years.

There is no evidence for this


Actually there was an art book last year that was released that included an official timeline.

The hardest part is that it branches off 3 ways, and that not all of the Link/Zelda characters are the same person (maybe a reincarnation or something?).
 
2012-09-06 06:39:35 PM

pyrotek85: Britney Spear's Speculum: dj_spanmaster: The Official Zelda Timeline

So, the splits are: Puzzle, Dark, and Cartoony?


This I have a problem with:
and the Wind Waker split is Link defeating Ganon and branching from his older years.

There is no evidence for this

Actually there was an art book last year that was released that included an official timeline.

The hardest part is that it branches off 3 ways, and that not all of the Link/Zelda characters are the same person (maybe a reincarnation or something?).


Confirmed. The Links and Zeldas who aren't in direct sequels are reincarnations of the hero and princess. Considering the amount of time between many of them, it's the only way to explain it. Ganondorf, though, is eternal and the same one in all the games he's been in.
 
2012-09-06 07:14:50 PM

Keizer_Ghidorah: pyrotek85: Britney Spear's Speculum: dj_spanmaster: The Official Zelda Timeline

So, the splits are: Puzzle, Dark, and Cartoony?


This I have a problem with:
and the Wind Waker split is Link defeating Ganon and branching from his older years.

There is no evidence for this

Actually there was an art book last year that was released that included an official timeline.

The hardest part is that it branches off 3 ways, and that not all of the Link/Zelda characters are the same person (maybe a reincarnation or something?).

Confirmed. The Links and Zeldas who aren't in direct sequels are reincarnations of the hero and princess. Considering the amount of time between many of them, it's the only way to explain it. Ganondorf, though, is eternal and the same one in all the games he's been in.


24.media.tumblr.com
 
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