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(PennLive)   "Sorry, I am a Christian and I did not mean to plant marijuana on church property....I just wanted to get high on Jesus"   (pennlive.com) divider line 100
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5337 clicks; posted to Main » on 05 Sep 2012 at 2:34 PM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2012-09-05 04:52:36 PM

Cythraul: It's too bad that for communion, instead of the act of wafer eating and 'wine' drinking, you would smoke a little weed instead. Now that would be a fun organized religion to work with.


Halleluiah, and pass the pipe :)
/Done in one
 
2012-09-05 04:53:56 PM

tinfoil-hat maggie: Cythraul: It's too bad that for communion, instead of the act of wafer eating and 'wine' drinking, you would smoke a little weed instead. Now that would be a fun organized religion to work with.

Halleluiah, and pass the pipe :)
/Done in one


What would be "Hey padre, don't bogart that joint" in Latin?
 
2012-09-05 04:55:41 PM
Well, considering how many pot dealers are named Jesus, he really didn't have to go to those lengths.
 
2012-09-05 05:02:09 PM

Gyrfalcon: tinfoil-hat maggie: Cythraul: It's too bad that for communion, instead of the act of wafer eating and 'wine' drinking, you would smoke a little weed instead. Now that would be a fun organized religion to work with.

Halleluiah, and pass the pipe :)
/Done in one

What would be "Hey padre, don't bogart that joint" in Latin?


Sorry, I was raised Methodist no Latin, but hey you could go out and do anything during the week as long as you came and tithed on Sunday :)
 
2012-09-05 05:03:02 PM

Sybarite: That Jesus, always trying to keep people from getting stoned.


I see what you did there, very clever!
 
2012-09-05 05:05:38 PM

tinfoil-hat maggie: Gyrfalcon: tinfoil-hat maggie: Cythraul: It's too bad that for communion, instead of the act of wafer eating and 'wine' drinking, you would smoke a little weed instead. Now that would be a fun organized religion to work with.

Halleluiah, and pass the pipe :)
/Done in one

What would be "Hey padre, don't bogart that joint" in Latin?

Sorry, I was raised Methodist no Latin, but hey you could go out and do anything during the week as long as you came and tithed on Sunday :)


I was Episcopal and we used the Catholic ceremony except for Mass and confession. Although I think our reverend would have been okay with an occasional toke.
 
2012-09-05 05:07:28 PM
Why are people still so retarded about marijuana?
 
2012-09-05 05:09:54 PM

BHK: Sorry, but the enforcers for the state care nothing about your Christianity or any other beliefs or morals or viewpoints. They serve to enforce the will of the political class and will throw your (well beaten) ass into jail for violating any political edict. Unless, of course, you are well connected to the political class, in which case you probably can make the arrest go away.

These aren't "laws of the land", they are edicts handed out by our rulers and cheered on by the sheep (who cower in terror at the idea of their shepherds being subverted.) Follow Jesus' advice and don't fight evil with violence. If "following the law" means doing violence to your fellow citizen who has done nothing to harm another, then you are a poor follower of Jesus.


Very well said!
 
2012-09-05 05:11:46 PM

Gyrfalcon: tinfoil-hat maggie: Cythraul: It's too bad that for communion, instead of the act of wafer eating and 'wine' drinking, you would smoke a little weed instead. Now that would be a fun organized religion to work with.

Halleluiah, and pass the pipe :)
/Done in one

What would be "Hey padre, don't bogart that joint" in Latin?


"Pater, ne esse contentio cum illa iuncturam"?
 
2012-09-05 05:13:01 PM
Jesus took one gram and stoned the masses. He then took one Cheeto and satisfied all their munchies.

/Cheech 4:20
 
2012-09-05 05:18:43 PM

Gyrfalcon: tinfoil-hat maggie: Gyrfalcon: tinfoil-hat maggie: Cythraul: It's too bad that for communion, instead of the act of wafer eating and 'wine' drinking, you would smoke a little weed instead. Now that would be a fun organized religion to work with.

Halleluiah, and pass the pipe :)
/Done in one

What would be "Hey padre, don't bogart that joint" in Latin?

Sorry, I was raised Methodist no Latin, but hey you could go out and do anything during the week as long as you came and tithed on Sunday :)

I was Episcopal and we used the Catholic ceremony except for Mass and confession. Although I think our reverend would have been okay with an occasional toke.


Well Genesis 1:29, only thing that makes sense in that book until it gets to Jesus walking out of the telephone booth and saying "Be excellent to one another" :)
 
2012-09-05 05:28:32 PM
Does anyone realize how fast the people that don't smoke marijuana would wipe out the people that do smoke marijuana if was legalized?
 
2012-09-05 05:30:46 PM

fisker: Does anyone realize how fast the people that don't smoke marijuana would wipe out the people that do smoke marijuana if was legalized?


Not following you:

Are you saying because they refuse to smoke marijuana they're all going to become mass murderers?
 
2012-09-05 05:32:19 PM

fisker: Does anyone realize how fast the people that don't smoke marijuana would wipe out the people that do smoke marijuana if was legalized?


I don't think that would be a problem.
 
2012-09-05 05:32:23 PM

Gyrfalcon: tinfoil-hat maggie: Cythraul: It's too bad that for communion, instead of the act of wafer eating and 'wine' drinking, you would smoke a little weed instead. Now that would be a fun organized religion to work with.

Halleluiah, and pass the pipe :)
/Done in one

What would be "Hey padre, don't bogart that joint" in Latin?


Greatest bumper sticker of all time..."Steve Garvey, He's my Padre". After Garvey got traded from the Dodgers to the Padres then faced a paternity suit.
 
2012-09-05 05:36:25 PM

whidbey: fisker: Does anyone realize how fast the people that don't smoke marijuana would wipe out the people that do smoke marijuana if was legalized?

Not following you:

Are you saying because they refuse to smoke marijuana they're all going to become mass murderers?


I'm saying that users are losers and losers are users.
 
2012-09-05 05:37:41 PM

Inflatable Rhetoric: fisker: Does anyone realize how fast the people that don't smoke marijuana would wipe out the people that do smoke marijuana if was legalized?

I don't think that would be a problem.


I know you don't, 'scrow.

I know you don't.
 
2012-09-05 05:39:03 PM

fisker: whidbey: fisker: Does anyone realize how fast the people that don't smoke marijuana would wipe out the people that do smoke marijuana if was legalized?

Not following you:

Are you saying because they refuse to smoke marijuana they're all going to become mass murderers?

I'm saying that users are losers and losers are users.


i.usatoday.net
 
2012-09-05 05:39:54 PM

fisker: whidbey: fisker: Does anyone realize how fast the people that don't smoke marijuana would wipe out the people that do smoke marijuana if was legalized?

Not following you:

Are you saying because they refuse to smoke marijuana they're all going to become mass murderers?

I'm saying that users are losers and losers are users.


That's nice. Any more pearls of wisdom since we've got you on the line?
 
2012-09-05 05:43:18 PM

fisker: whidbey: fisker: Does anyone realize how fast the people that don't smoke marijuana would wipe out the people that do smoke marijuana if was legalized?

Not following you:

Are you saying because they refuse to smoke marijuana they're all going to become mass murderers?

I'm saying that users are losers and losers are users.


awww what a cute troll.
 
2012-09-05 05:43:23 PM

Ow! That was my feelings!: fisker: whidbey: fisker: Does anyone realize how fast the people that don't smoke marijuana would wipe out the people that do smoke marijuana if was legalized?

Not following you:

Are you saying because they refuse to smoke marijuana they're all going to become mass murderers?

I'm saying that users are losers and losers are users.

[i.usatoday.net image 490x360]


cdn.ksk.uproxx.com
 
2012-09-05 05:47:51 PM

fisker: [i.usatoday.net image 490x360]


Post something else really dumb. You're on a roll.
 
2012-09-05 05:49:55 PM

RobSeace: Gyrfalcon: tinfoil-hat maggie: Cythraul: It's too bad that for communion, instead of the act of wafer eating and 'wine' drinking, you would smoke a little weed instead. Now that would be a fun organized religion to work with.

Halleluiah, and pass the pipe :)
/Done in one

What would be "Hey padre, don't bogart that joint" in Latin?

"Pater, ne esse contentio cum illa iuncturam"?


Amen.
 
2012-09-05 05:50:30 PM

whidbey: fisker: [i.usatoday.net image 490x360]

Post something else really dumb. You're on a roll.


Do you want to talk about it?

Wait, maybe you can help me.
 
2012-09-05 05:51:27 PM

fisker: whidbey: fisker: [i.usatoday.net image 490x360]

Post something else really dumb. You're on a roll.

Do you want to talk about it?

Wait, maybe you can help me.


Actually you're on your own.

I would suggest, however, you first drop the bit about people who smoke marijuana being "losers."

All it does is invite ridicule.
 
2012-09-05 05:53:07 PM

fisker: Inflatable Rhetoric: fisker: Does anyone realize how fast the people that don't smoke marijuana would wipe out the people that do smoke marijuana if was legalized?

I don't think that would be a problem.

I know you don't, 'scrow.

I know you don't.


I wish I knew stuff, like you know stuff.
How did you acquire this knowledge?
 
2012-09-05 05:58:03 PM
When I hear that someone is a Christian, I grab my wallet and hide it more so than if they were not a Christian.
 
2012-09-05 05:59:45 PM

Inflatable Rhetoric: fisker: Inflatable Rhetoric: fisker: Does anyone realize how fast the people that don't smoke marijuana would wipe out the people that do smoke marijuana if was legalized?

I don't think that would be a problem.

I know you don't, 'scrow.

I know you don't.

I wish I knew stuff, like you know stuff.
How did you acquire this knowledge?


Because I am a lawyer.
 
2012-09-05 06:00:51 PM

holybull99: When I hear that someone is a Christian, I grab my wallet and hide it more so than if they were not a Christian.


They are also losers.
 
2012-09-05 06:01:06 PM

holybull99: When I hear that someone is a Christian, I grab my wallet and hide it more so than if they were not a Christian.


Wm. S. Burroughs advised when entering into a business agreement with a Christian "Get it in writing."
 
2012-09-05 06:01:50 PM

fisker: holybull99: When I hear that someone is a Christian, I grab my wallet and hide it more so than if they were not a Christian.

They are also losers.


Whereas you are a paragon of human virtue.

Maybe you should sign up to have your DNA shot into the cosmos.
 
2012-09-05 06:03:35 PM

whidbey: fisker: whidbey: fisker: [i.usatoday.net image 490x360]

Post something else really dumb. You're on a roll.

Do you want to talk about it?

Wait, maybe you can help me.

Actually you're on your own.

I would suggest, however, you first drop the bit about people who smoke marijuana being "losers."

All it does is invite ridicule.


Noted.
 
2012-09-05 06:05:17 PM

whidbey: fisker: holybull99: When I hear that someone is a Christian, I grab my wallet and hide it more so than if they were not a Christian.

They are also losers.

Whereas you are a paragon of human virtue.

Maybe you should sign up to have your DNA shot into the cosmos.


Is this a mom joke?
 
2012-09-05 06:06:55 PM

Gyrfalcon: Miss Stein: If you're gonna get high on Jesus, weed's the way to go.

Besides, the Bible is quite clear on not taking the Lord in vein.

You're going to Hell for that pun.


Puns are my weakness; sorry about that.

I appreciate your bluntness.
 
2012-09-05 06:07:13 PM

fisker: whidbey: fisker: holybull99: When I hear that someone is a Christian, I grab my wallet and hide it more so than if they were not a Christian.

They are also losers.

Whereas you are a paragon of human virtue.

Maybe you should sign up to have your DNA shot into the cosmos.

Is this a mom joke?


I wasn't aware it was a joke at all.
 
2012-09-05 06:08:41 PM

fisker: Does anyone realize how fast the people that don't smoke marijuana would wipe out the people that do smoke marijuana if was legalized?


Maybe if they legalized it, those goddam Nickelodeon cartoons might actually be funny, or any modern cartoon at that.
 
2012-09-05 06:09:59 PM

fisker: Inflatable Rhetoric: fisker: Inflatable Rhetoric: fisker: Does anyone realize how fast the people that don't smoke marijuana would wipe out the people that do smoke marijuana if was legalized?

I don't think that would be a problem.

I know you don't, 'scrow.

I know you don't.

I wish I knew stuff, like you know stuff.
How did you acquire this knowledge?

Because I am a lawyer.


Wow. Do all lawyers know about the effects of marijuana?
 
2012-09-05 06:11:30 PM

whidbey: fisker: whidbey: fisker: holybull99: When I hear that someone is a Christian, I grab my wallet and hide it more so than if they were not a Christian.

They are also losers.

Whereas you are a paragon of human virtue.

Maybe you should sign up to have your DNA shot into the cosmos.

Is this a mom joke?

I wasn't aware it was a joke at all.


Because you're not joking.

You are like some kind of a marijuana warrior.
 
2012-09-05 06:14:59 PM

Inflatable Rhetoric: fisker: Inflatable Rhetoric: fisker: Inflatable Rhetoric: fisker: Does anyone realize how fast the people that don't smoke marijuana would wipe out the people that do smoke marijuana if was legalized?

I don't think that would be a problem.

I know you don't, 'scrow.

I know you don't.

I wish I knew stuff, like you know stuff.
How did you acquire this knowledge?

Because I am a lawyer.

Wow. Do all lawyers know about the effects of marijuana?


Yes. The effects make you a winner.
 
2012-09-05 06:20:40 PM

fisker: You are like some kind of a marijuana warrior.


Whatever you think I am, it isn't going to distract me from the wrongheaded notions you apparently believe about marijuana users.

It really is time to stop trolling the thread and own up to your shortcomings. Just a tip.
 
2012-09-05 06:33:39 PM

mr_bunny: and society, and thus the children, are once again safe.


This prohibition is such a monumental waste of time, money and man power.

Stand up. Get on jury duty. Nullify every single case.


But it gives the cops so much pleasure to bust kids for pot...why...why...it's better than sex for them.
They love doing it more than their radar traps.
 
2012-09-05 06:38:54 PM

Miss Stein: Gyrfalcon: Miss Stein: If you're gonna get high on Jesus, weed's the way to go.

Besides, the Bible is quite clear on not taking the Lord in vein.

You're going to Hell for that pun.

Puns are my weakness; sorry about that.

I appreciate your bluntness.


You need to 'shop that onto that "inspirational poster" showing the junkie shooting up into Jesus's arm. It was the first thing I thought of.
 
2012-09-05 06:56:06 PM

Gyrfalcon: Miss Stein: Gyrfalcon: Miss Stein: If you're gonna get high on Jesus, weed's the way to go.

Besides, the Bible is quite clear on not taking the Lord in vein.

You're going to Hell for that pun.

Puns are my weakness; sorry about that.

I appreciate your bluntness.

You need to 'shop that onto that "inspirational poster" showing the junkie shooting up into Jesus's arm. It was the first thing I thought of.


loldrugs.com
 
2012-09-05 07:12:27 PM

dr_blasto: I've recently thought that it would make it easier to legalize if we had some sort of Johnny Appleseed-like campaign where all the dirty stoners collected all the seeds they could and made a point to sow those seeds in every public place in every state. Drop them in every roadside, public park, church lot, every government building, fence line, wherever. Get it growing everywhere from thousands and thousands of seed.


keep spreading the word, keep sowing the seed. in 5 years the amber waves of grain will take on a different hue, from sea to shining see.
 
2012-09-05 09:01:32 PM
The thing is this, if you let everyone smoke weed in church, they'll soon come to the realization that their organization is no longer relevant and so they just might stop going altogether.

Sure, they might get some stragglers that make an attempt to reform the church in order to bring it more line with reality and modern day society, but the higher ups proooooobably won't be having any of that anytime soon. Yeah.
 
2012-09-05 09:41:47 PM

MrEricSir: There's a long traditions of Christianity and booze. Why not weed, really?


Since when does logic and reason matter to religious people?
 
2012-09-05 09:45:49 PM
i471.photobucket.com

...is a hard-liner.
 
2012-09-05 10:49:28 PM
To the anti-marijuana christians - you know what else started out as a "fringe" group, whose followers were locked up and suffered through the worst of the legal system for simply partaking in their path and ritual of choice?

//please consider that before justifying your hatred of a plant that was demonized for a mixture of a publishing magnate's gain (william randolph hearst) and racism. The harms of the bullets flying because it's illegal, and ruining potential careers from the criminal record, vastly outweigh the dangers of the plant to our society.
 
2012-09-05 11:44:25 PM

whidbey: fisker: You are like some kind of a marijuana warrior.

Whatever you think I am, it isn't going to distract me from the wrongheaded notions you apparently believe about marijuana users.

It really is time to stop trolling the thread and own up to your shortcomings. Just a tip.


Jesus.

No. You.

You weren't able to follow what I was saying when I made my Weeners. You still don't, wont, or can't.

I am almost 100% sure that you think that because I quoted a song from an anti-drug commercial from the past you assume that I have wrongheaded notions about marijuana users.

Or, I may actually be concerned with the long-term effects of large portions of a society using the drug. As opposed to those who do not use the drug and the widening gap that would eventually become increasing noticeable between the two.

And I wasn't asking you. I was asking if anyone may be able to realize that or if it may become an actual issue if one side no longer wanted to put up with the other.

But your right. It was my shortcomings and something about mass murders and losers and stuff. Those I say that I can't distract you from.
 
2012-09-05 11:46:14 PM

Vodka Zombie: Cythraul: It's too bad that for communion, instead of the act of wafer eating and 'wine' drinking, you would smoke a little weed instead. Now that would be a fun organized religion to work with.

I think it's called Rasta, and you might look into it.


I am currently associatin w Rasta, duuuuuude, you learn SO much about the universe
 
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