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(The Daily Dolt)   The Democrats remove the word "God" from their official platform. Conservatives react with nuance and tolerance. Just kidding, they're already saying the heathen Dems are waging a "War on God"   (thedailydolt.com) divider line 155
    More: Amusing, Democrats, god, Freak Out  
•       •       •

1576 clicks; posted to Politics » on 05 Sep 2012 at 8:19 AM (2 years ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



155 Comments   (+0 »)
   
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2012-09-05 10:19:23 AM  

Mugato: Sure, referencing God in political speeches is silly (WTF does "God Bless America" even mean?) but people love it and right before the election isn't the time or place to stir that shiat up.


I am not religious but you have to be intentionally thick to claim to not understand what "God Bless America" means.
 
2012-09-05 10:22:14 AM  
I don't know why the talibanicals are always so worried about atheists starting a "war on god". Even if I wanted to, I don't even know how to lead a war against someone's imagination.
 
2012-09-05 10:23:00 AM  
i.chzbgr.com
 
2012-09-05 10:24:52 AM  

karnal: .....also not heard about yet are: "marriage penalties", "hefty surtax for small businesses" and "tax cuts to people who don't pay taxes".


Because they're all bullshiat? That last one doesn't even make sense within the context of republican derp.
 
2012-09-05 10:25:35 AM  

Vegan Meat Popsicle: I don't know why the talibanicals are always so worried about atheists starting a "war on god". Even if I wanted to, I don't even know how to lead a war against someone's imagination.


that's probably not gonna happen
 
2012-09-05 10:28:31 AM  

skullkrusher: Vegan Meat Popsicle: I don't know why the talibanicals are always so worried about atheists starting a "war on god". Even if I wanted to, I don't even know how to lead a war against someone's imagination.

that's probably not gonna happen


It's pretty fetch.
 
2012-09-05 10:30:36 AM  

Epoch_Zero: skullkrusher: Vegan Meat Popsicle: I don't know why the talibanicals are always so worried about atheists starting a "war on god". Even if I wanted to, I don't even know how to lead a war against someone's imagination.

that's probably not gonna happen

It's pretty fetch.


cf.drafthouse.com

don't need to tell me to post a Mean Girls pic twice
 
2012-09-05 10:31:03 AM  
God has no business being part of a party's platform. A party's platform is supposed to be for all people, including those who don't believe in God.

I'm an atheist, and I don't care if every speaker ends their remarks with "God Bless America". That's different than saying the party wants to advance a Christofascist regime on the country, should they get elected.
 
2012-09-05 10:31:36 AM  

Vegan Meat Popsicle: I don't know why the talibanicals are always so worried about atheists starting a "war on god". Even if I wanted to, I don't even know how to lead a war against someone's imagination.


Reality TV. It's been proven time and time again to absolutely destroy anything even resembling imagination.
 
2012-09-05 10:32:02 AM  

jst3p: Mugato: Sure, referencing God in political speeches is silly (WTF does "God Bless America" even mean?) but people love it and right before the election isn't the time or place to stir that shiat up.

I am not religious but you have to be intentionally thick to claim to not understand what "God Bless America" means.


Sorry, I really don't. I guess if you hear a phrase so many times you don't bother to actually stop and think what the words mean but really, what does it mean? God, bless this chuck of geography? God bless the American way of life and fark everyone else, especially those who don't worship you? We're your favorite, right God? And why are we telling God what to do anyway? It's meaningless American exceptionalist bullshiat and our leaders shouldn't be parroting it like farking drones.

But 2 months before the election is not the time for this.
 
2012-09-05 10:33:01 AM  
Clearly the Republican god is too weak and helpless to defend itself, therefore it must be defended by continental scale WHARGARBLE
 
2012-09-05 10:33:32 AM  

Mugato: jst3p: Mugato: Sure, referencing God in political speeches is silly (WTF does "God Bless America" even mean?) but people love it and right before the election isn't the time or place to stir that shiat up.

I am not religious but you have to be intentionally thick to claim to not understand what "God Bless America" means.

Sorry, I really don't. I guess if you hear a phrase so many times you don't bother to actually stop and think what the words mean but really, what does it mean? God, bless this chuck of geography? God bless the American way of life and fark everyone else, especially those who don't worship you? We're your favorite, right God? And why are we telling God what to do anyway? It's meaningless American exceptionalist bullshiat and our leaders shouldn't be parroting it like farking drones.

But 2 months before the election is not the time for this.


you might need to settle down. God save the Queen? Same idea. God bless mommy, daddy and my little brother Tommy? I don't think that means "fark everyone else".
 
2012-09-05 10:39:13 AM  

Mugato: jst3p: Mugato: Sure, referencing God in political speeches is silly (WTF does "God Bless America" even mean?) but people love it and right before the election isn't the time or place to stir that shiat up.

I am not religious but you have to be intentionally thick to claim to not understand what "God Bless America" means.

Sorry, I really don't.


It's not what it means, it's what's implied by its absence. It's like the flag lapel pin. Failure to have either in a speech means you're an America-hating godless commie.
 
2012-09-05 10:41:48 AM  
I'm just going to attribute the mother lode of derp on Fark today as a panic response to the stunning success of the convention's opening night.

The right heard a big noise and now they're just sh*tt*ng all over the place.
 
2012-09-05 10:47:09 AM  

Nina_Hartley's_Ass: I'm just going to attribute the mother lode of derp on Fark today as a panic response to the stunning success of the convention's opening night.

The right heard a big noise and now they're just sh*tt*ng all over the place.


It kind of reminds me of the time my cat ate floss. I noticed streaks of poo on the carpet and when I found him, he was going in circles trying to catch the floss that was hanging out of his own butthole.
 
2012-09-05 10:55:04 AM  

silo123j: Big tent Dems, bring em all in under the big tent.

Just because "God" isn't in their platform, maybe a Jewish person wrote G-d. Or they wanted to be open to Muslims. Or pagans. Or Wiccans. Or his noodley appendages might bless everyone.

OR maybe we are just ok with who we are and where we are going that we don't need to invoke the name, just follow some good practices of treating everyone nicely. (which is what Jesus said, anyway)


The Democrats are just responding to changing demographics. Atheists and agnostics are the fastest growing segment of the populace. They are 12-15% of the population with a rapidly increasing percentage expected to reach around 20% by 2030 as most of the Boomers die off.
 
2012-09-05 10:59:42 AM  

skullkrusher: Epoch_Zero: skullkrusher: Vegan Meat Popsicle: I don't know why the talibanicals are always so worried about atheists starting a "war on god". Even if I wanted to, I don't even know how to lead a war against someone's imagination.

that's probably not gonna happen

It's pretty fetch.

[cf.drafthouse.com image 640x418]

don't need to tell me to post a Mean Girls pic twice


Rachel McAdams in a mini-skirt? I'll be in my bunk.
 
2012-09-05 10:59:54 AM  

Mugato: But 2 months before the election is not the time for this.


I always thought that the purpose of the convention was to make adjustments to the official platform, ratify that platform, and nominate the candidates that would be the standard bearers of that platform.
 
2012-09-05 11:07:29 AM  

skullkrusher: you might need to settle down. God save the Queen? Same idea. God bless mommy, daddy and my little brother Tommy? I don't think that means "fark everyone else".


There's a reason the word God is not written anywhere in the Constitution.
 
2012-09-05 11:10:47 AM  

Serious Black: skullkrusher: Epoch_Zero: skullkrusher: Vegan Meat Popsicle: I don't know why the talibanicals are always so worried about atheists starting a "war on god". Even if I wanted to, I don't even know how to lead a war against someone's imagination.

that's probably not gonna happen

It's pretty fetch.

[cf.drafthouse.com image 640x418]

don't need to tell me to post a Mean Girls pic twice

Rachel McAdams in a mini-skirt? I'll be in my bunk.


I watched Wedding Crashers again this weekend. There's something about that girl. She draws you in like a farking tractor beam.
 
2012-09-05 11:11:31 AM  

cameroncrazy1984: skullkrusher: you might need to settle down. God save the Queen? Same idea. God bless mommy, daddy and my little brother Tommy? I don't think that means "fark everyone else".

There's a reason the word God is not written anywhere in the Constitution.


yeah but we're not talking about the Constitution. We're talking about the apparently baffling phrase "God bless America"
 
2012-09-05 11:19:48 AM  

skullkrusher: cameroncrazy1984: skullkrusher: you might need to settle down. God save the Queen? Same idea. God bless mommy, daddy and my little brother Tommy? I don't think that means "fark everyone else".

There's a reason the word God is not written anywhere in the Constitution.

yeah but we're not talking about the Constitution. We're talking about the apparently baffling phrase "God bless America"


The idea of god in general is baffling to me. But as far as that phrase goes, it was probably borne out of Cold War paranoia about the godless commies.
 
2012-09-05 11:20:49 AM  

imontheinternet: Serious Black: skullkrusher: Epoch_Zero: skullkrusher: Vegan Meat Popsicle: I don't know why the talibanicals are always so worried about atheists starting a "war on god". Even if I wanted to, I don't even know how to lead a war against someone's imagination.

that's probably not gonna happen

It's pretty fetch.

[cf.drafthouse.com image 640x418]

don't need to tell me to post a Mean Girls pic twice

Rachel McAdams in a mini-skirt? I'll be in my bunk.

I watched Wedding Crashers again this weekend. There's something about that girl. She draws you in like a farking tractor beam.


I'd let her use her tractor beam on me, if you know what I mean.
 
2012-09-05 11:23:00 AM  

skullkrusher: We're talking about the apparently baffling phrase "God bless America"


It is somewhat baffling. If the phrase were "God blesses America", it could be seen as an observation. "May God bless America" sounds like an expression of hope, or a plea for His protection or benevolence. "God bless America" sounds like a command. Who would be bold enough to command God?
 
2012-09-05 11:23:01 AM  
Maybe instead of telling God to bless America we should try harder to give Him reasons to.
 
2012-09-05 11:28:32 AM  

More_Like_A_Stain: skullkrusher: We're talking about the apparently baffling phrase "God bless America"

It is somewhat baffling. If the phrase were "God blesses America", it could be seen as an observation. "May God bless America" sounds like an expression of hope, or a plea for His protection or benevolence. "God bless America" sounds like a command. Who would be bold enough to command God?


pretty sure "God bless America" is a plea.

I've always been struck how a lot of prayer sounds more like orders than requests. The Lord's Prayer doesn't say "please forgive us our trespasses" or "would you be so kind as to not lead us into temptation" it pretty much orders it
 
2012-09-05 11:29:43 AM  
blogs.riverfronttimes.com
 
2012-09-05 11:44:32 AM  
I am a member of a charity group down to the local Catholic church, and they send out e-mails to keep everyone informed. But several of the members use this email list for political purposes, almost all of them partisan republican. I received several copies of this over the last few days:

Democratic Convention First Day Schedule
The Democrats Convention opens Tuesday. Here is the tentative schedule for the first day:

3:30 PM - Entrance parade of corrupt union bosses, homosexual activists, abortion doctors, aged "our movement will rise again" hippies, Black Panthers, anti-war (unless a Democrat is waging it) activists, "we're-not-illegal-we're-undocumented-immigrants-so-let-us-in-your-cou ntry-and-give-us-licenses" advocates and "free speech as long as you agree with us" radicals.
4:00 PM - Opening Flag Burning Ceremony
4:05 PM - Singing of "God Damn America" led by Rev. Jeremiah Wright
4:10 PM - Pledge of Allegiance to Obama
4:15 PM - Ceremonial I hate America led by Michelle Obama
4:30 PM - Tips on Dodging Sniper Fire - Hillary Clinton
4:45 PM - Rev Jessie Jackson Leads Castrati Choir in Singing "Great Balls of Fire"
5:00 PM - UFO Abduction Survival - Joe Biden
5:30 PM - Eliot Spitzer Speaks on "Family Values" via Satellite
5:45 PM - Tribute to All 57 States
6:00 PM - Joe Biden Delivers 100,000-Word Speech Featuring 23-Minute Question and 2-Hour Answer
8:30 PM - Airing of Grievances by the Clintons
9:00 PM - Bill Clinton Delivers Rousing Endorsement of Obama Girl
9:15 PM - Tribute Film to Freedom Fighters at Gitmo - Michael Moore
9:45 PM - Personal Finance Seminar - Charlie Rangel
10:00 PM - Denunciation of Bitter Gun Owners 10:30 PM - Ceremonial Waving of White Flag for IRAQ, & Afghanistan
11:00 PM - Obama Energy Plan Symposium/Tire Gauge Demonstration
11:15 PM - Free Gov. Blagojevich rally
11:30 PM - Obama Accepts Tony and Latin Grammy Awards
11:45 PM - Feeding of the Delegates with 5 Loaves and 2 Fish - Obama Presiding
12:00 AM - Official Nomination of Obama by Bill Maher
12:01 AM - Obama Accepts Nomination for Lord and Savior
12:05 AM - Celestial Choirs Sing
3:00 AM - Biden Delivers Acceptance Speech


And if I didn't pass it on, I would have all sorts of awful bad terrible things happen to me.
Now I don't really believe in all that mess, but this morning I broke my favorite coffee cup and then went out and found I had a flat tire on my pickup truck, and had to change it in the rain. So just to be on the safe side, I am passing it on.
 
2012-09-05 12:02:26 PM  
varmitydog: I am a member of a charity group down to the local Catholic church, and they send out e-mails to keep everyone informed. But several of the members use this email list for political purposes, almost all of them partisan republican. I received several copies of this over the last few days:

Democratic Convention First Day Schedule
The Democrats Convention opens Tuesday. Here is the tentative schedule for the first day:

3:30 PM - Entrance parade of corrupt union bosses, homosexual activists, abortion doctors, aged "our movement will rise again" hippies, Black Panthers, anti-war (unless a Democrat is waging it) activists, "we're-not-illegal-we're-undocumented-immigrants-so-let-us-in-your-cou ntry-and-give-us-licenses" advocates and "free speech as long as you agree with us" radicals.
4:00 PM - Opening Flag Burning Ceremony
4:05 PM - Singing of "God Damn America" led by Rev. Jeremiah Wright
4:10 PM - Pledge of Allegiance to Obama
4:15 PM - Ceremonial I hate America led by Michelle Obama
4:30 PM - Tips on Dodging Sniper Fire - Hillary Clinton
4:45 PM - Rev Jessie Jackson Leads Castrati Choir in Singing "Great Balls of Fire"
5:00 PM - UFO Abduction Survival - Joe Biden
5:30 PM - Eliot Spitzer Speaks on "Family Values" via Satellite
5:45 PM - Tribute to All 57 States
6:00 PM - Joe Biden Delivers 100,000-Word Speech Featuring 23-Minute Question and 2-Hour Answer
8:30 PM - Airing of Grievances by the Clintons
9:00 PM - Bill Clinton Delivers Rousing Endorsement of Obama Girl
9:15 PM - Tribute Film to Freedom Fighters at Gitmo - Michael Moore
9:45 PM - Personal Finance Seminar - Charlie Rangel
10:00 PM - Denunciation of Bitter Gun Owners 10:30 PM - Ceremonial Waving of White Flag for IRAQ, & Afghanistan
11:00 PM - Obama Energy Plan Symposium/Tire Gauge Demonstration
11:15 PM - Free Gov. Blagojevich rally
11:30 PM - Obama Accepts Tony and Latin Grammy Awards
11:45 PM - Feeding of the Delegates with 5 Loaves and 2 Fish - Obama Presiding
12:00 AM - Official Nomination of Obama b ...


Some of that's pretty funny.

/dem
 
2012-09-05 12:08:14 PM  

varmitydog: I am a member of a charity group down to the local Catholic church, and they send out e-mails to keep everyone informed. But several of the members use this email list for political purposes, almost all of them partisan republican. I received several copies of this over the last few days:


That sounds like a parody of what conservatives find funny. So it's probably accurate.
 
2012-09-05 12:12:17 PM  
Sorry GOP but you already began a war on God by picking that Mormon.
 
2012-09-05 12:25:06 PM  

Nina_Hartley's_Ass: I'm just going to attribute the mother lode of derp on Fark today as a panic response to the stunning success of the convention's opening night.

The right heard a big noise and now they're just sh*tt*ng all over the place.


And the fact that michelle obama gave a speech that was actually pretty impressive versus the fact that female romney took speech lessons from oprah. As first ladies go, obama did more to make her husband look good than female romney ever will.
 
2012-09-05 12:26:09 PM  

Slaves2Darkness: silo123j: Big tent Dems, bring em all in under the big tent.

Just because "God" isn't in their platform, maybe a Jewish person wrote G-d. Or they wanted to be open to Muslims. Or pagans. Or Wiccans. Or his noodley appendages might bless everyone.

OR maybe we are just ok with who we are and where we are going that we don't need to invoke the name, just follow some good practices of treating everyone nicely. (which is what Jesus said, anyway)

The Democrats are just responding to changing demographics. Atheists and agnostics are the fastest growing segment of the populace. They are 12-15% of the population with a rapidly increasing percentage expected to reach around 20% by 2030 as most of the Boomers die off.


heh
You said reach around....
 
2012-09-05 12:27:34 PM  

Serious Black: skullkrusher: Epoch_Zero: skullkrusher: Vegan Meat Popsicle: I don't know why the talibanicals are always so worried about atheists starting a "war on god". Even if I wanted to, I don't even know how to lead a war against someone's imagination.

that's probably not gonna happen

It's pretty fetch.

[cf.drafthouse.com image 640x418]

don't need to tell me to post a Mean Girls pic twice

Rachel McAdams in a mini-skirt? I'll be in my bunk.


you should watch "the fighter" then. See through bra and nice undies FTW
 
2012-09-05 01:08:15 PM  

greenboy: Nina_Hartley's_Ass: I'm just going to attribute the mother lode of derp on Fark today as a panic response to the stunning success of the convention's opening night.

The right heard a big noise and now they're just sh*tt*ng all over the place.

And the fact that michelle obama gave a speech that was actually pretty impressive versus the fact that female romney took speech lessons from oprah. As first ladies go, obama did more to make her husband look good than female romney ever will.


Oprah's a self-made woman who came from dirt-poor origins and being raped into pregnancy as a pre-teen, into being a titled beauty queen, college graduate and billionaire media mogul. Don't ever dis Oprah by associating her with Stepford Romney.
 
2012-09-05 01:15:03 PM  
I have no problem with this whatsoever. An agnostic party is a party I would join.
 
2012-09-05 01:23:58 PM  

ExperianScaresCthulhu: greenboy: Nina_Hartley's_Ass: I'm just going to attribute the mother lode of derp on Fark today as a panic response to the stunning success of the convention's opening night.

The right heard a big noise and now they're just sh*tt*ng all over the place.

And the fact that michelle obama gave a speech that was actually pretty impressive versus the fact that female romney took speech lessons from oprah. As first ladies go, obama did more to make her husband look good than female romney ever will.

Oprah's a self-made woman who came from dirt-poor origins and being raped into pregnancy as a pre-teen, into being a titled beauty queen, college graduate and billionaire media mogul. Don't ever dis Oprah by associating her with Stepford Romney.


let's not go crazy here. the association was with the tones and intonations that romney used were imitations of oprah. Any comparison was for the purpose of showing that romney has never worked. she takes, buys, and steals the things she wants.
 
2012-09-05 01:26:37 PM  

keylock71: Good.

Let the regressive, knuckle-dragging authoritarians throw a hissy fit.

Keep your god in church where he belongs.


True that. God is like your car. It helps you get where you want to go, but once you're there, you leave it parked outside or in your garage. You don't drive it to your desk, or your schoolroom, or wherever.
 
2012-09-05 01:34:43 PM  

Huck And Molly Ziegler: True that. God is like your car. It helps you get where you want to go, but once you're there, you leave it parked outside or in your garage. You don't drive it to your desk, or your schoolroom, or wherever.


Was I wrong? should I have not done that?
 
2012-09-05 01:37:39 PM  

varmitydog: Democratic Convention First Day Schedule


Fascinating. Almost every line of that has been unchanged for 4 years.

/i'm surprised that The Terrorist Bill Ayers wasn't represented
 
x23
2012-09-05 02:07:43 PM  

imontheinternet: Christians are just shy of 80% of the population


pretty sure in most (non-self-reporting) polls i've seen it is 75-80% that "believe in god" ... not "are Christians".

i see Christians *claim* that automatically means 80% are Christians but i am pretty sure that isn't the case.
 
2012-09-05 02:13:14 PM  
encrypted-tbn3.google.com
Bartleby, you're talking about farking *war* on *God* Well, *fark* that! I have seen what happens to the proud when they take on the Throne! I'm going back to Wisconsin
 
2012-09-05 02:15:13 PM  

deadcrickets: Sorry GOP but you already began a war on God by picking that Mormon.


Don't you mean 'idol-worshipping mormon cultist'?
 
2012-09-05 02:29:19 PM  

x23: imontheinternet: Christians are just shy of 80% of the population

pretty sure in most (non-self-reporting) polls i've seen it is 75-80% that "believe in god" ... not "are Christians".

i see Christians *claim* that automatically means 80% are Christians but i am pretty sure that isn't the case.


I don't give a rat's behind if America is 98% self-identified Christian. "Congress shall make no law respecting an establishment of religion, or prohibiting the free exercise thereof; ..." means a more than "you have the freedom to be a Christian. It means that America belongs equally to those citizens who are Jewish, Muslim, Buddhist, Hindu, Sikh, agnostic, atheist, and so on.Don't expect others to participate in your dream of theocracy.
 
2012-09-05 02:31:56 PM  
My grammar and punctuation has fallen off the cliff today. I need to slow down and hit that preview button more often.
 
2012-09-05 02:38:41 PM  

Lunaville: My grammar and punctuation has fallen off the cliff today. I need to slow down and hit that preview button more often.


THeres a preview button
 
2012-09-05 02:48:18 PM  

GhostFish: NateGrey: Pretty sure I heard "God Bless America" a few times.

Didnt they end the night on a prayer?

Pretty sure every speaker said "God bless America" or some such, and yes they did end with a benediction.

It's almost as if they view worship as a personal matter, that the majority of them proudly and happily embrace, but that the party doesn't see fit to foist on anyone through their platform or through their governing.

How terrible.


Well how very Christian of them.

No, really. Jesus actually said to pray in secret, and that those who pray in public and who make a show of their piety are hypocrites at best. Matthew chapter 6.

/Atheist
//I actually like the first half of Matt 6. You shouldn't make a big deal out of your piety (or lack thereof), or of your charity (especially if your charity is motivated by your piety {or lack thereof}).
 
2012-09-05 03:18:26 PM  

Coco LaFemme: I'm an atheist, and I don't care if every speaker ends their remarks with "God Bless America". That's different than saying the party wants to advance a Christofascist regime on the country, should they get elected.


If every speaker did, that would seem to be getting into Ceterum censeo Carthaginem delendam esse territory.

Slaves2Darkness: The Democrats are just responding to changing demographics. Atheists and agnostics are the fastest growing segment of the populace. They are 12-15% of the population with a rapidly increasing percentage expected to reach around 20% by 2030 as most of the Boomers die off.


You're confusing atheists/agnostics with Nothingarians -- the more general category of the religiously unaffiliated. Overall, atheists/agnostics combined make up about a quarter of the "None" category overall, and apparently have for a fair while. However, they currently seem (according to the Georgetown/PRRI study of Millennials) about 50% of the 18-25 "None" demographic. Thus, atheists/agnostics are growing at least proportionately to the "Nones", and possibly a LOT faster in the youngest cohorts.
 
2012-09-05 05:04:25 PM  
Looks like the Dems are putting both God and Jeruselum back into their platform right now.
 
2012-09-05 05:06:05 PM  

quizzical: Looks like the Dems are putting both God and Jeruselum back into their platform right now.


And it didn't sound to me like the amendment passed with a 2/3 voice vote, but they put it back in anyway. Done deal.
 
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