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(The State)   ♫ And I would walk five hundred miles, and I would walk five hundred more, just to be the dog who wal... SQUIRREL   (thestate.com) divider line 49
    More: Sappy, Myrtle Beach, dissenting opinions, Winchester, dogs  
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7173 clicks; posted to Main » on 02 Sep 2012 at 9:25 PM (2 years ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



49 Comments   (+0 »)
   
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest

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2012-09-02 09:26:30 PM  
This song is getting a workout this year on Fark!
 
2012-09-02 09:30:59 PM  
Mark Wessells

His middle name had better be Nuclear
 
2012-09-02 09:32:08 PM  
Wish we had micro-chips for pets back in the 70s when I was little. I just know old Casey didn't go to live on a nice farm somewhere upstate like my old man told me..I just know it...bastard!
 
2012-09-02 09:32:37 PM  
My name is BUCK, and I'm here to FU(K!

/sorry couldn't help it
//Yes I could
///3s
 
2012-09-02 09:37:13 PM  

publikenemy: Wish we had micro-chips for pets back in the 70s when I was little. I just know old Casey didn't go to live on a nice farm somewhere upstate like my old man told me..I just know it...bastard!


You know, my parents fed me this line when I was like 7 or 8 and I believed it until I actually sat down and thought about it for bit sometime in my mid-20's. *facepalm*
 
2012-09-02 09:37:26 PM  
Damn dust storm.
 
2012-09-02 09:38:08 PM  
...and I get lost if the sky is overcast...
 
2012-09-02 09:38:27 PM  
i291.photobucket.com
 
2012-09-02 09:39:05 PM  

Sick and Tired of Being Sick and Tired: Mark Wessells

His middle name had better be Nuclear


You rock. Not as much as the doggy does, but still.
 
2012-09-02 09:40:20 PM  
The dog's expression is priceless.
"TA DA!"
 
2012-09-02 09:43:21 PM  

Sick and Tired of Being Sick and Tired: Mark Wessells

His middle name had better be Nuclear


Came in for a Chekov reference.

/Well done
 
2012-09-02 09:43:38 PM  
+1 Subby...

It had several people in my house giggling uncontrollably for a few minutes...
 
2012-09-02 09:44:20 PM  
As soon as Wessells entered the exam room, the 2-year-old lab that traveled about 500 miles to get home, showered his owner in kisses.

Awwww...DOG KISSES!
 
2012-09-02 09:44:37 PM  
Swag.
 
2012-09-02 09:49:02 PM  

Sick and Tired of Being Sick and Tired: Mark Wessells

His middle name had better be Nuclear


HA that's a good one. You now owe me a new keyboard sir
 
2012-09-02 09:51:35 PM  
FTA: About a week after leaving Virginia, Wessells father called saying Buck was gone.

"He just disappeared," Wessells said. "We thought somebody stole him because that was the only thing we could think of..."

sorry dude. your family are typical morans too stupid to keep a dog on a lead. like many americans you come from a family of idiots. i'm glad you dog is okay.
 
2012-09-02 09:57:49 PM  

KrispyKritter: sorry dude. your family are typical morans too stupid to keep a dog on a lead. like many americans you come from a family of idiots. i'm glad you dog is okay


Yes, because when you live on a large acreage in the middle of nowhere, it's important to keep the dog on the leash at ALL TIMES.

/weirdo
 
2012-09-02 10:06:16 PM  
I play in a band with the drummer from that track so I'm really getting a kick...

/not a kick drum
 
2012-09-02 10:16:44 PM  

gadian: publikenemy: Wish we had micro-chips for pets back in the 70s when I was little. I just know old Casey didn't go to live on a nice farm somewhere upstate like my old man told me..I just know it...bastard!

You know, my parents fed me this line when I was like 7 or 8 and I believed it until I actually sat down and thought about it for bit sometime in my mid-20's. *facepalm*


I am very sorry for your loss.
 
2012-09-02 10:22:36 PM  
I just read that aloud to my wife and my dog jumped up in a rush and ran to the window. (i said the S word)
 
2012-09-02 10:27:20 PM  

Dimensio: gadian: publikenemy: Wish we had micro-chips for pets back in the 70s when I was little. I just know old Casey didn't go to live on a nice farm somewhere upstate like my old man told me..I just know it...bastard!

You know, my parents fed me this line when I was like 7 or 8 and I believed it until I actually sat down and thought about it for bit sometime in my mid-20's. *facepalm*

I am very sorry for your loss.


That article was the best thing I've read all week. Thank you.
 
2012-09-02 10:31:12 PM  

Sick and Tired of Being Sick and Tired: Mark Wessells

His middle name had better be Nuclear


That only works if you say it in a Russian accent.
 
2012-09-02 10:37:59 PM  
I've talked to people who found dogs before, putting up posters.... but didn't know to check for a microchip!

It's the FIRST thing you do. Any animal shelter or vet can scan it. You don't need an appointment at the vet, nor do you need to pay for an exam. You might call ahead to make sure they're not too busy at the moment though.

Putting up posters and taking out ads are a waste of time IF the ID chip's right there.
 
2012-09-02 10:39:33 PM  

Sick and Tired of Being Sick and Tired: Mark Wessells

His middle name had better be Nuclear


I bow to your genius.
 
2012-09-02 11:18:21 PM  

Oznog: I've talked to people who found dogs before, putting up posters.... but didn't know to check for a microchip!

It's the FIRST thing you do. Any animal shelter or vet can scan it. You don't need an appointment at the vet, nor do you need to pay for an exam. You might call ahead to make sure they're not too busy at the moment though.

Putting up posters and taking out ads are a waste of time IF the ID chip's right there.


We just adopted a dog who had been returned to the rescue after a year. Our first vet appointment we got her chipped. I was surprised to find the previous owners never did that. All our pets get chipped on their first trip to the vet.

/$50 is a small price to pay to get my dog home
 
2012-09-02 11:18:39 PM  

Dallymo: As soon as Wessells entered the exam room, the 2-year-old lab that traveled about 500 miles to get home, showered his owner in kisses.

Awwww...DOG KISSES!


"When a dog kisses you, so does everything the dog has ever kissed."
 
2012-09-02 11:23:01 PM  

QT_3.14159: KrispyKritter: sorry dude. your family are typical morans too stupid to keep a dog on a lead. like many americans you come from a family of idiots. i'm glad you dog is okay

Yes, because when you live on a large acreage in the middle of nowhere, it's important to keep the dog on the leash at ALL TIMES.

/weirdo


Get an invisible fence! You can install it yourself. The only hard part is training-WAIT! how smart is your dog?
 
2012-09-02 11:40:32 PM  
Would be nice if the article included some kind of time frame so we could tell how long the dog was missing. I'm curious as to how long it took it to travel 500 miles...
 
2012-09-02 11:43:49 PM  

Kryptonic Silencer: Would be nice if the article included some kind of time frame so we could tell how long the dog was missing. I'm curious as to how long it took it to travel 500 miles...


More or less what I was thinking.
 
2012-09-02 11:45:26 PM  
squirrel?
farm8.staticflickr.com
 
2012-09-02 11:56:08 PM  

Donn C. Drummond in Disguise: Get an invisible fence! You can install it yourself. The only hard part is training-WAIT! how smart is your dog?


My dog? My dog is smart. I lived in a neighborhood with a small yard a few miles from my parents house and when the tornado blew my fence down we took him to my folks who have 5 acres. The 3 weeks he was there, he happily waited for them by the doors and followed my dad around when he was outside. He did not and would not have (for any reason) attempted to go back to the small sad little yard.

Now we actually live in my parent's old house and he's just as happy to stay home and greet us as he was them. Some dogs stay home.
 
2012-09-03 12:12:20 AM  

Mr_H: Oznog: I've talked to people who found dogs before, putting up posters.... but didn't know to check for a microchip!

It's the FIRST thing you do. Any animal shelter or vet can scan it. You don't need an appointment at the vet, nor do you need to pay for an exam. You might call ahead to make sure they're not too busy at the moment though.

Putting up posters and taking out ads are a waste of time IF the ID chip's right there.

We just adopted a dog who had been returned to the rescue after a year. Our first vet appointment we got her chipped. I was surprised to find the previous owners never did that. All our pets get chipped on their first trip to the vet.

/$50 is a small price to pay to get my dog home


I had my dog chipped.

He was delicious on toast.
 
2012-09-03 12:20:37 AM  

QT_3.14159: KrispyKritter: sorry dude. your family are typical morans too stupid to keep a dog on a lead. like many americans you come from a family of idiots. i'm glad you dog is okay

Yes, because when you live on a large acreage in the middle of nowhere, it's important to keep the dog on the leash at ALL TIMES.

/weirdo


Generally, if you have taught your dog to come when called above all else (seeing deer is my dog's biggest challenge) then sure, let him run around. If you can't, even if you do live on acreage- you should probably keep him contained in some way.

In any case, microchip your pets! I found a dog wandering around my neighborhood today. She had a collar but no tags. WTF? I gave her food and water and put her in my fenced yard while I looked for people looking for a dog. We found the owners. Also- train your dog not to door dash. Even if your dog wears a collar with tags they easily lose it.

I was completely pissed because their dog looked like she just had puppies, I could see her ribs (might be connected to the just having puppies part) and her claws were VERY long (I am sure it was uncomfortable for her to walk), not to mention that they couldn't even bother buying a $5 tag with their phone number on it. Honestly, I was just glad that someone wanted her and hadn't just dumped her. People are such shiat heads.
 
2012-09-03 12:53:17 AM  
Dogs are called man's best friend for a reason.
 
2012-09-03 01:01:14 AM  

MAYORBOB: Dogs are called man's best friend for a reason.


That reason is mutual admiration. The man admires how the dog can lick his own testicles, the dog admires how the man can drive away and come back with neatly wrapped pieces of cow.
 
2012-09-03 01:03:50 AM  

Kryptonic Silencer: Would be nice if the article included some kind of time frame so we could tell how long the dog was missing. I'm curious as to how long it took it to travel 500 miles...


I wouldn't think it would take too long. The dog probably hitchhiked.
 
2012-09-03 01:13:27 AM  
3.bp.blogspot.com

Unimpressed.
 
2012-09-03 01:38:25 AM  

QT_3.14159: KrispyKritter: sorry dude. your family are typical morans too stupid to keep a dog on a lead. like many americans you come from a family of idiots. i'm glad you dog is okay

Yes, because when you live on a large acreage in the middle of nowhere, it's important to keep the dog on the leash at ALL TIMES.

/weirdo


For many breeds if you train them from an early age you can get them to stay on the property. I have a friend in the middle-of-no-where PA with over 150 acres. I asked him to give me a tour, he pointed to the dog (a purebred mutt) and sure enough that dog took me right along right along the perimeter just inside the property line (followed myself on google maps). Have family with about 50 acres and they are walking the puppy daily now, only a leash near the road and at 16 weeks the dog knows where to stop. That said some breeds will just take off. I wouldn't let my Beagle off her leash until she was 12 and only when I was walking/running with her. Alone she would wander off wherever her nose took her.
 
2012-09-03 02:15:23 AM  

MAYORBOB: Dogs are called man's best friend for a reason.


Yeah.
Tell that to the dog that pissed on the floor above where I was working last week.
I thought we nicked a water line.
Nope. Dog piss dripping on my head.

/Never met a cat I didn't like
 
2012-09-03 02:29:08 AM  

tinfoil-hat maggie: squirrel?
[farm8.staticflickr.com image 240x180]


I loves my squirrels.

My Eastern Gray squirrel just turned 14 last week.

/She won't last much longer, she's pretty much blind now, but she has been a fantastic little squirrel!
 
2012-09-03 05:21:26 AM  

MAYORBOB: Dogs are called man's best friend for a reason.


The same reason that hungry classmates are the "best friends" of a student who orders pizza.

Dogs are commensal scavengers who specialize in sponging off gullible primates by taking advantage of their social and nurturing instincts. Dogs are to friendship what sexy sheep are to love. The feelings don't go both ways, though they may look like they do, especially if you are kind and generous to your dog and a considerate lover to your sheep. If you want friendship, you need to get it from a hominid that can communicate in English, and doesn't crap and make territorial pissings everywhere, and doesn't bark all night over territorial claims and struggles for sexual access, and there are still plenty of humans in America who satisfy these requirements. It's pathetic to settle for a dog. You may as well hang out with a guido.
 
2012-09-03 07:35:16 AM  

ShannonKW: MAYORBOB: Dogs are called man's best friend for a reason.

The same reason that hungry classmates are the "best friends" of a student who orders pizza.

Dogs are commensal scavengers who specialize in sponging off gullible primates by taking advantage of their social and nurturing instincts. Dogs are to friendship what sexy sheep are to love. The feelings don't go both ways, though they may look like they do, especially if you are kind and generous to your dog and a considerate lover to your sheep. If you want friendship, you need to get it from a hominid that can communicate in English, and doesn't crap and make territorial pissings everywhere, and doesn't bark all night over territorial claims and struggles for sexual access, and there are still plenty of humans in America who satisfy these requirements. It's pathetic to settle for a dog. You may as well hang out with a guido.


I'll take a dog over you any day.
 
2012-09-03 07:51:49 AM  

FlyingV936: I'll take a dog over you any day.


Far from being your best friend, I'm not your friend at all, so that would be a wise choice in itself.
 
2012-09-03 09:15:44 AM  

Shadow Blasko: tinfoil-hat maggie: squirrel?
[farm8.staticflickr.com image 240x180]

I loves my squirrels.

My Eastern Gray squirrel just turned 14 last week.

/She won't last much longer, she's pretty much blind now, but she has been a fantastic little squirrel!


Are you a dog?
 
2012-09-03 09:35:40 AM  

Donn C. Drummond in Disguise: QT_3.14159: KrispyKritter: sorry dude. your family are typical morans too stupid to keep a dog on a lead. like many americans you come from a family of idiots. i'm glad you dog is okay

Yes, because when you live on a large acreage in the middle of nowhere, it's important to keep the dog on the leash at ALL TIMES.

/weirdo

Get an invisible fence! You can install it yourself. The only hard part is training-WAIT! how smart is your dog?


Our 3 rescue dogs; black Lab, JRT and Husky/shepherd mix are all participating in the invisible fence program. Unfortunately our black lab flunked out of the program.

He'd stand next to the gate, collar around his neck and it's chirping away zapping him repeatedly while he twitches, pants and yaps at me. I think the silly bastard liked getting zapped.

His collar is now a hot spare for the other ones.
 
2012-09-03 10:31:46 AM  

Donn C. Drummond in Disguise: Shadow Blasko: tinfoil-hat maggie: squirrel?
[farm8.staticflickr.com image 240x180]

I loves my squirrels.

My Eastern Gray squirrel just turned 14 last week.

/She won't last much longer, she's pretty much blind now, but she has been a fantastic little squirrel!

Are you a dog?


i303.photobucket.com
 
2012-09-03 12:09:02 PM  

FlyingV936: ShannonKW: MAYORBOB: Dogs are called man's best friend for a reason.

The same reason that hungry classmates are the "best friends" of a student who orders pizza.

Dogs are commensal scavengers who specialize in sponging off gullible primates by taking advantage of their social and nurturing instincts. Dogs are to friendship what sexy sheep are to love. The feelings don't go both ways, though they may look like they do, especially if you are kind and generous to your dog and a considerate lover to your sheep. If you want friendship, you need to get it from a hominid that can communicate in English, and doesn't crap and make territorial pissings everywhere, and doesn't bark all night over territorial claims and struggles for sexual access, and there are still plenty of humans in America who satisfy these requirements. It's pathetic to settle for a dog. You may as well hang out with a guido.

I'll take a dog over you any day.


Really. Dogs can't type.
 
2012-09-03 02:52:11 PM  

Enormous-Schwanstucker: Donn C. Drummond in Disguise: QT_3.14159: KrispyKritter: sorry dude. your family are typical morans too stupid to keep a dog on a lead. like many americans you come from a family of idiots. i'm glad you dog is okay

Yes, because when you live on a large acreage in the middle of nowhere, it's important to keep the dog on the leash at ALL TIMES.

/weirdo

Get an invisible fence! You can install it yourself. The only hard part is training-WAIT! how smart is your dog?

Our 3 rescue dogs; black Lab, JRT and Husky/shepherd mix are all participating in the invisible fence program. Unfortunately our black lab flunked out of the program.

He'd stand next to the gate, collar around his neck and it's chirping away zapping him repeatedly while he twitches, pants and yaps at me. I think the silly bastard liked getting zapped.

His collar is now a hot spare for the other ones.


I've never met a lab/mix that didn't fall into the "pretty, but dumb" category.
 
2012-09-03 09:54:26 PM  

mikefinch: Unimpressed.


Damn you, now I've got something in my eye.
 
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