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(ABC)   "Later, during intercourse, he had 'significant pain and observed a large quantity of blood squirting out of his penis onto the sheets, walls and mirror'"   (abcnews.go.com) divider line 283
    More: Scary, product liability, Harris County  
•       •       •

27093 clicks; posted to Main » on 31 Aug 2012 at 12:44 AM (2 years ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2012-08-31 01:34:51 AM  

puckhead: there's a Peter North joke in there somewhere


I was just cruising the Foobies tab, but needless to say this thread has given me a serious case of peter south.
 
2012-08-31 01:35:40 AM  
Wait....you can piss and fap at the same time?
 
2012-08-31 01:36:16 AM  

Salem Witch: LowbrowDeluxe: penis de-gloving? Closed urethra? Retrograde ejaculation?!?!? SO MANY MEDICAL TERMS I DIDN'T KNOW I HATED

What in the ever loving jeebus is Retrograde Ejaculation?

/The Mr. asked if it came with fuzzy dice-balls.


Semen goes into the bladder instead of out the penis.
 
2012-08-31 01:36:50 AM  

Salem Witch: LowbrowDeluxe: penis de-gloving? Closed urethra? Retrograde ejaculation?!?!? SO MANY MEDICAL TERMS I DIDN'T KNOW I HATED

What in the ever loving jeebus is Retrograde Ejaculation?

/The Mr. asked if it came with fuzzy dice-balls.


[cringing]

Is it when the penis starts to come and then sucks the ejaculate back up the urethra?
 
2012-08-31 01:37:01 AM  

911Jenny: Wait....you can piss and fap at the same time?


You can do a lot of things and fap at the same time. If you talk to people with certain Fetishes, to them it actually feels like an orgasm.
 
2012-08-31 01:37:40 AM  
My only question is, "this morning would have a Fark.com penis trifecta?"
 
2012-08-31 01:37:46 AM  

Grestep: Salem Witch: LowbrowDeluxe: penis de-gloving? Closed urethra? Retrograde ejaculation?!?!? SO MANY MEDICAL TERMS I DIDN'T KNOW I HATED

What in the ever loving jeebus is Retrograde Ejaculation?

/The Mr. asked if it came with fuzzy dice-balls.

Semen goes into the bladder instead of out the penis.


Subby`s mom was so nasty, the sperm retreated to a fall bac position?
 
2012-08-31 01:38:17 AM  
Is there a gif of it?
 
2012-08-31 01:38:18 AM  
cdn.walyou.com

/GIS for "Bloody Dick."
//Now you do it.
///It'll be fun.
 
2012-08-31 01:38:29 AM  
FTA On its website, the company says VirilisPro is "made with only natural ingredients to prevent harmful side effects."

He can't have kids anymore, so I guess they're right.
 
2012-08-31 01:38:50 AM  

Omahawg: go ahead and think about the noise a hungry fat man makes when he sucks up a coconut cream pie through a straw.

think about that

degloving

yes yes


You are just sick, sad and wrong.

I read your comment to Mr. Witch and he is holding his junk and laughing like a madman.
 
2012-08-31 01:39:38 AM  
Next time don't take the whole bottle at once or try to wash it down with two grams of coke, mmkay cowboy?
 
2012-08-31 01:40:28 AM  

BronyMedic: 911Jenny: Wait....you can piss and fap at the same time?

You can do a lot of things and fap at the same time. If you talk to people with certain Fetishes, to them it actually feels like an orgasm.


Im sure the spiders wouldnt mjnd the side action...

/they get an anal degloving of sorts when they die
 
2012-08-31 01:40:31 AM  

BronyMedic: 911Jenny: Wait....you can piss and fap at the same time?

You can do a lot of things and fap at the same time. If you talk to people with certain Fetishes, to them it actually feels like an orgasm.


I am not clicking any of your links.

No. *slaps your nose with a rolled up paper* NO. BAD!
 
2012-08-31 01:40:47 AM  

Oznog: BronyMedic: knbber2: WTF is degloving a penis????

*shudder*

Prepare for nightmare fuel.

A degloving injury is a type of avulsion in which an extensive section of skin is completely torn off the underlying tissue, severing its blood supply. It is named by analogy to the process of removing a glove. Degloved skin is effectively dead.

This is what a degloving injury to the penis, secondary to an underlying disease process, looks like. Not safe for work, sanity if you're a male, and not for lunch.

That's not what he's describing in TFA.

It's a terrifying yet completely reasonable, safe surgical technique where they cut the skin in a ring behind the glans and slide it down towards the abdomen. The blood supply and nerves are basically safe because they're not separated from the base and it exposes the entire length of internal junk for repair with a minimum of cutting, stitching, scarring. It is the procedure used for any "broken penis" injury AFAIK.

TFA: Emergency room doctors had to "deglove" Carter's penis in order to repair it, rendering him unable to have sex or future children, Carter claimed.
Well, not from THIS procedure.


SHUTUPSHUTUPSHUTUPSHUTUPSHUTUPSHUTUPSHUTUPSHUTUPSHUTUPSHUTUP
 
2012-08-31 01:41:16 AM  
Guess a 4 hour erection just became Okey Dokey!
 
2012-08-31 01:41:31 AM  
I don't know whether to laugh, cry or see a shrink after this thread, but I am glad that I have fark to make sure we're not aloe in experiencing the who..horror..
 
2012-08-31 01:41:43 AM  

911Jenny: Wait....you can piss and fap at the same time?


Think of it as a hand cocked sprinkler...
 
2012-08-31 01:41:59 AM  

DORMAMU: what happens when you piss while fapping?


www.thehosedown.com
 
2012-08-31 01:42:48 AM  

911Jenny: BronyMedic: 911Jenny: Wait....you can piss and fap at the same time?

You can do a lot of things and fap at the same time. If you talk to people with certain Fetishes, to them it actually feels like an orgasm.

I am not clicking any of your links.

No. *slaps your nose with a rolled up paper* NO. BAD!


Careful, based on that link you might have given him an orgasm...
 
2012-08-31 01:44:04 AM  
Unfortunate ad before the video playback. Here is the screen capture. It was Clinton endorsing the Big O.

farm9.staticflickr.com/">
 
2012-08-31 01:45:26 AM  

DeltaPunch: DORMAMU: what happens when you piss while fapping?


*golclap.gif*

I do find it interesting 911jenny has focused in the fapping piss instead of the spiders sqautting in your penile portrusion... Well squatting till evicted by degloving...
 
2012-08-31 01:45:32 AM  

freewill: He sees a case -- called "eggplant penis" -- at least once a month.

[www.mikelawton.com image 323x301]


This was pretty much the expression on my face when I saw the headline.
 
2012-08-31 01:45:38 AM  

DORMAMU: areful, based on that link you might have given him an orgasm..


WAIT, WHAT?!

www.pc486.net

Watersports aren't my bag, baby!
 
2012-08-31 01:46:50 AM  
fc09.deviantart.net
What a Bloody Sanchez may look like.

/Lookee at what I invented.
 
2012-08-31 01:48:38 AM  

BronyMedic: DORMAMU: areful, based on that link you might have given him an orgasm..

WAIT, WHAT?!



Watersports aren't my bag, baby!


I was referring to the rolled up paper swatting of your nose!

/Not a do it yourself log flume.
 
2012-08-31 01:49:21 AM  

DORMAMU: DeltaPunch: DORMAMU: what happens when you piss while fapping?

*golclap.gif*

I do find it interesting 911jenny has focused in the fapping piss instead of the spiders sqautting in your penile portrusion... Well squatting till evicted by degloving...


I've learned a lot today.

Spiders live in your skin til they explode from poo.

Degloving

And you can fap and pee at the same time.

Which leads me to...can you even pee and um, finish, at the same time?

/I don't know how you guys walk around with those things.
 
2012-08-31 01:49:48 AM  
this thread is not making me happy.
 
2012-08-31 01:51:24 AM  
members.mrtc.com
 
2012-08-31 01:52:11 AM  

Summer Glau's Love Slave: [fc09.deviantart.net image 350x466]
What a Bloody Sanchez may look like.

/Lookee at what I invented.


And right now the porn industry is creating a new fetish category, thanks to you.
 
2012-08-31 01:53:32 AM  

Summer Glau's Love Slave: [fc09.deviantart.net image 350x466]
What a Bloody Sanchez may look like.

/Lookee at what I invented.


I farking hate everyone here, especially you, SGLS, you take a horrible thread and make it even worse. You are a very bad person.
 
2012-08-31 01:53:32 AM  
To answer your question, i refer you to the link you swatted bronymedic on the nose for.

As for your slashie, i will quote the venerable & wise Robin Williams:

GOD GAVE MAN TWO HEADS! BUT ONLY ENOUGH BLOOD TO USE ONE AT A TIME!
 
2012-08-31 01:55:32 AM  

911Jenny: Which leads me to...can you even pee and um, finish, at the same time?


Some men can, but it's not a true orgasm. Certain parts of the male anatomy, when stimulated, can cause bladder spasms which can make you pee. When you have a true orgasm, that little sphincter at the base of your bladder slams shut. Certain things, like sounding or catheter play, can cause you to pee with an orgasm, because they're physically stinting the bladder open.

Women, on the other hand, can most definitely pee and have an orgasm. It's one of the reasons women can "squirt"

/how did we get on THIS?!
 
2012-08-31 01:55:38 AM  
my penis looks like a belly button right now.
 
2012-08-31 01:56:15 AM  

LordOfThePings:


I see you & raise you:

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2012/05/24/asexual-mao-sugiyama-cooks-s e rves-own-genitals_n_1543307.html

/stir fry anyone?
 
2012-08-31 01:57:09 AM  
www.oddpic.com
Artists depiction of the accident.
 
2012-08-31 01:57:55 AM  

BronyMedic: 911Jenny: Which leads me to...can you even pee and um, finish, at the same time?

Some men can, but it's not a true orgasm. Certain parts of the male anatomy, when stimulated, can cause bladder spasms which can make you pee. When you have a true orgasm, that little sphincter at the base of your bladder slams shut. Certain things, like sounding or catheter play, can cause you to pee with an orgasm, because they're physically stinting the bladder open.

Women, on the other hand, can most definitely pee and have an orgasm. It's one of the reasons women can "squirt"

/how did we get on THIS?!


*raises hand*

My post near bottom of page 1.
 
2012-08-31 01:59:51 AM  

BronyMedic: 911Jenny: Which leads me to...can you even pee and um, finish, at the same time?

Some men can, but it's not a true orgasm. Certain parts of the male anatomy, when stimulated, can cause bladder spasms which can make you pee. When you have a true orgasm, that little sphincter at the base of your bladder slams shut. Certain things, like sounding or catheter play, can cause you to pee with an orgasm, because they're physically stinting the bladder open.

Women, on the other hand, can most definitely pee and have an orgasm. It's one of the reasons women can "squirt"

/how did we get on THIS?!


Thanks Doc!

/ahead of the curve
//prep is key to mess
///3rd times is the charm
 
2012-08-31 02:00:08 AM  

DORMAMU: I see you & raise you:

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2012/05/24/asexual-mao-sugiyama-cooks-s e rves-own-genitals_n_1543307.html

/stir fry anyone?


What.... it's just a ball of clay.
 
2012-08-31 02:00:38 AM  

BronyMedic: 911Jenny: Which leads me to...can you even pee and um, finish, at the same time?

Some men can, but it's not a true orgasm. Certain parts of the male anatomy, when stimulated, can cause bladder spasms which can make you pee. When you have a true orgasm, that little sphincter at the base of your bladder slams shut. Certain things, like sounding or catheter play, can cause you to pee with an orgasm, because they're physically stinting the bladder open.

Women, on the other hand, can most definitely pee and have an orgasm. It's one of the reasons women can "squirt"

/how did we get on THIS?!


and i didn't think this could get anymore disturbing....huh.
/you're quite the fountain of information aren't you?
 
2012-08-31 02:02:21 AM  
 
2012-08-31 02:03:41 AM  
I had a joke about Lorena Bobbitt changing her tactics, but then Basemetal happened.
 
2012-08-31 02:04:05 AM  

drayno76: Summer Glau's Love Slave: [fc09.deviantart.net image 350x466]
What a Bloody Sanchez may look like.

/Lookee at what I invented.

I farking hate everyone here, especially you, SGLS, you take a horrible thread and make it even worse. You are a very bad person.


*Clicks Favorites*
 
2012-08-31 02:05:32 AM  

Summer Glau's Love Slave: [www.oddpic.com image 443x437]
Artists depiction of the accident.


t1.gstatic.com

Close up of the malfunction
 
2012-08-31 02:06:11 AM  
You know, I would've been content going my whole life without knowing this.

Now? Now I'm going to be fearing it my whole life. Thank you, subby. I'll remember to curse you on my deathbed.
 
2012-08-31 02:06:53 AM  
Now Im going to ask my boyfriend if he has accidentally peed-za'd when he meant to French fry.

Or maybe I dont want to know.

No....I do.
 
2012-08-31 02:07:34 AM  

LordOfThePings: DORMAMU: I see you & raise you:

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2012/05/24/asexual-mao-sugiyama-cooks-s e rves-own-genitals_n_1543307.html

/stir fry anyone?

What.... it's just a ball of clay.


Sorry. lookked like a liquid nitrogen frozen mammal teste dropped on the floor.

\carr on
 
2012-08-31 02:08:32 AM  

Gyrfalcon: this thread is not making me happy.


Why? I'm laughing my ass off, sorry degloving my ass :)
 
2012-08-31 02:08:44 AM  

DORMAMU: To answer your question, i refer you to the link you swatted bronymedic on the nose for.

As for your slashie, i will quote the venerable & wise Robin Williams:

GOD GAVE MAN TWO HEADS! BUT ONLY ENOUGH BLOOD TO USE ONE AT A TIME!


This message intended for 911jenny....
 
2012-08-31 02:09:20 AM  
www.russellheimlich.com

/Penis.
//The other red meat.
 
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