Do you have adblock enabled?
 
If you can read this, either the style sheet didn't load or you have an older browser that doesn't support style sheets. Try clearing your browser cache and refreshing the page.

(Yahoo)   Oh, non, pas cette merde à nouveau   (news.yahoo.com ) divider line
    More: Stupid, Canadian History, Canada Day, student protests, St. Lawrence River, separatists, Quebec, Prime Minister Stephen Harper, Pauline Marois  
•       •       •

8450 clicks; posted to Main » on 28 Aug 2012 at 1:30 PM (3 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



166 Comments   (+0 »)
   
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest

Archived thread

First | « | 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | » | Last | Show all
 
2012-08-28 03:11:08 PM  
Hostie de câlice de tabarnak de saint-ciboire!
 
2012-08-28 03:11:28 PM  
but i am le tired...
 
2012-08-28 03:12:48 PM  

phojo1946: The idea of Quebec seceeding from Canada is particularly attractive to the US because once it occurs, Canada will break apart and guess who will be therre to pick up the pieces...you're too smart for me...right...Uncle Sam and we will have new states in the union and new sources of natural resources to plunder. It was believed that the parts of Canada would not be strong enough to make a go of it on their own and would go into negotiations with the US to unite with us. It might take a few years to happen but eventually it would. Just think of all the oil, iron, etc that would be available around our new northern border on the Arctic Circle. And we wouldn't have to fire a single shot to make it happen.


Don't you have a convention or something that you are supposed to be at?
 
2012-08-28 03:13:14 PM  

doctorguilty: puckrock2000: Biness: mon dieu!

scare bleu!

Dijion!

Fromage!

Tabarnac!

LATRINE!

/ hanging out with Chevalier, Montage, Detente, Avant Garde, and Deja Vu
// obscure?


You forgot Chocolate Mousse and Hillary.

/it means "woman whose bosoms defy gravity"
 
2012-08-28 03:15:24 PM  

Andrew Wiggin: but i am le tired...


Well, have a nap. Then FIRE ZE MISSILES!
 
2012-08-28 03:16:20 PM  

montreal_medic: Love how they always forget us english-speaking Quebecois .....


Peasant!
 
2012-08-28 03:17:15 PM  

miss diminutive: Biness: Bondith: doctorguilty: puckrock2000: Biness: mon dieu!

scare bleu!

Dijion!

Fromage!

Tabarnac!

LATRINE!

Pamplemousse!

Deja vu!

Maudit de chrisse de putain de sacrament de bordel de merde de saloperie de conard d'encule et nique ta mere!


Caulisse!

Culture en danger

Click on CC on bottom right to turn on subtitles

/Still don't know who to vote for. Maybe the Parti Nul because they all suck.
 
2012-08-28 03:18:36 PM  

miss diminutive: Biness: Bondith: doctorguilty: puckrock2000: Biness: mon dieu!

scare bleu!

Dijion!

Fromage!

Tabarnac!

LATRINE!

Pamplemousse!

Deja vu!

Maudit de chrisse de putain de sacrament de bordel de merde de saloperie de conard d'encule et nique ta mere!


i didn't know you were bi!

/what color to you prefer? time to finally favorite you.
 
2012-08-28 03:18:38 PM  

montreal_medic: Hostie de câlice de tabarnak de saint-ciboire!


I was going to put exactly that. :)
 
2012-08-28 03:20:08 PM  
I'm not unemployed or smuggling cigarettes across the border
I don't eat Pepsi and Mae West for breakfast
I don't watch da hockey game doing it doggie-style
And no, I don't know Claude, Manon, or François in Abitibi-Témiscamingue
But I'm sure they all have nice teeth

I smoke in church
I speak "Québecois" and "joual", not "French" or "Hanglish"
I pronounce it "tird", not third
And eating French fries with cheese makes sense, mon ostie,
I believe in a distinct society, as long as someone else pays for it
I believe in language-police, not equal rights
And, calisse, I believe that Club Super-Sex is an appropriate place
for my wife and me to celebrate our anniversaire
What the hell, she goes on at ten anyway

In Québec, the Stanley Cup actually comes around more often than
Halley's comet
I can get beer at the dépanneur, not the convenience store
And maybe I can't turn right on a red light
But tabarnac, I can go right through it
Because Québec is the world's largest producer of maple syrup
The home of Céline Dion and Roch Voisine
The land where everybody is shacking up and the legal drinking age is
just a suggestion

Je m'appelle Guy, and I am not Canadian

Mot, t'a dit, tabarnac, ostie.
Merci, salut la vedette
 
2012-08-28 03:23:54 PM  

the_sidewinder: Gyrfalcon: but first do some research on how landlocked non-producing nations actually fare in the global economy. (Hint: They're all grindingly poor and full of angry people)

You may want to consult a map first, Quebec isn't exactly what I'd call "landlocked"


OK, my bad. I was thinking of Ontario. Which may be part of the problem actually.
 
2012-08-28 03:26:25 PM  

cyberbenali: montreal_medic: Hostie de câlice de tabarnak de saint-ciboire!

I was going to put exactly that. :)


Don't blame you - It's the only one worth using when you really need to swear. English has many strengths, swearing is not among them
 
2012-08-28 03:26:48 PM  

Gyrfalcon: your neighbor to the south hates Frenchies


So does our Prime Minister at the moment. You want to know the biggest allies of Quebec independence right now? Stephen Harper's contempt and Jean Charest's utter corruption. If it hadn't been for those two assholes separatism would be as dead and buried as it was last year.
 
2012-08-28 03:29:39 PM  

ttc2301: "Only thing worse than a Frenchman is a Frenchman who lives in Canada."
-- Ted Nugent


Wow, you've just quoted a man who voluntarily once spent two months without washing and shat his pants for several days without changing in order to get out of national service (source: the nugeatorium himself). Being insulted by that spastic retard is hardly a dishonor. Also we're not "Frenchmen who live in Canada", in fact we're not Frenchmen at all.
 
2012-08-28 03:33:41 PM  

clevershark: So does our Prime Minister at the moment. You want to know the biggest allies of Quebec independence right now? Stephen Harper's contempt and Jean Charest's utter corruption. If it hadn't been for those two assholes separatism would be as dead and buried as it was last year.


You know what sucks? I used to live in Harper's riding

/My vote was as good as no vote
//Hate the guy 
///Still voted
 
2012-08-28 03:34:37 PM  

Andrew Wiggin: miss diminutive: Biness: Bondith: doctorguilty: puckrock2000: Biness: mon dieu!

scare bleu!

Dijion!

Fromage!

Tabarnac!

LATRINE!

Pamplemousse!

Deja vu!

Maudit de chrisse de putain de sacrament de bordel de merde de saloperie de conard d'encule et nique ta mere!

i didn't know you were bi!

/what color to you prefer? time to finally favorite you.


Écoutez votre coeur.
 
2012-08-28 03:35:56 PM  
clevershark

So does our Prime Minister at the moment. You want to know the biggest allies of Quebec independence right now? Stephen Harper's contempt and Jean Charest's utter corruption. If it hadn't been for those two assholes separatism would be as dead and buried as it was last year.


Which is odd, because he first got elected on the strength of the Quebec vote in 2006.

Quebec gave us Mulroney, then they gave us the Bloc, then they gave us Harper's minority, then they gave us a whole raft of unqualified NDPers. If they're not going to vote like grown-ups, maybe they should leave and stop farking it up for the rest of us.
 
2012-08-28 03:37:44 PM  

clevershark: Gyrfalcon: your neighbor to the south hates Frenchies

So does our Prime Minister at the moment. You want to know the biggest allies of Quebec independence right now? Stephen Harper's contempt and Jean Charest's utter corruption. If it hadn't been for those two assholes separatism would be as dead and buried as it was last yeamontreal_medic: cyberbenali: montreal_medic: Hostie de câlice de tabarnak de saint-ciboire!

I was going to put exactly that. :)

Don't blame you - It's the only one worth using when you really need to swear. English has many strengths, swearing is not among them

 

Use of the F-word in Canada. Start at 3:12
 
2012-08-28 03:40:02 PM  

cyberbenali: clevershark: Gyrfalcon: your neighbor to the south hates Frenchies

So does our Prime Minister at the moment. You want to know the biggest allies of Quebec independence right now? Stephen Harper's contempt and Jean Charest's utter corruption. If it hadn't been for those two assholes separatism would be as dead and buried as it was last yeamontreal_medic: cyberbenali: montreal_medic: Hostie de câlice de tabarnak de saint-ciboire!

I was going to put exactly that. :)

Don't blame you - It's the only one worth using when you really need to swear. English has many strengths, swearing is not among them 

Use of the F-word in Canada. Start at 3:12


I should add NSFW language
 
2012-08-28 03:40:21 PM  

cyberbenali: clevershark: Gyrfalcon: your neighbor to the south hates Frenchies

So does our Prime Minister at the moment. You want to know the biggest allies of Quebec independence right now? Stephen Harper's contempt and Jean Charest's utter corruption. If it hadn't been for those two assholes separatism would be as dead and buried as it was last yeamontreal_medic: cyberbenali: montreal_medic: Hostie de câlice de tabarnak de saint-ciboire!

I was going to put exactly that. :)

Don't blame you - It's the only one worth using when you really need to swear. English has many strengths, swearing is not among them 

Use of the F-word in Canada. Start at 3:12


Well placed! C'était Fouqué
 
2012-08-28 03:43:27 PM  
en nouveau Orleans, il pleut comme la vache qui pisse.
 
2012-08-28 03:45:57 PM  
At least they want to protect their natural resources from outside exploitation, unlike here in BC where we seem to want to be a province of China. We don't want our gold, or other valuable commodities, nor do we want our people working in the mines, so we'll just give it away. Quebec apparently wants an economy and some sort of self-sufficiency, which Harper isn't interested in for any Canadian but his cronies. Bush v2.0.1.

Go Quebec Go.
 
2012-08-28 03:47:19 PM  
You really have to respect the Canadians. They discuss this sort of thing in a more or less civilized fashion and one expects that they would all abide by whatever the outcome is. The last time the US went down this path, 600,000 people died.
 
2012-08-28 03:48:41 PM  

miss diminutive: Andrew Wiggin: miss diminutive: Biness: Bondith: doctorguilty: puckrock2000: Biness: mon dieu!

scare bleu!

Dijion!

Fromage!

Tabarnac!

LATRINE!

Pamplemousse!

Deja vu!

Maudit de chrisse de putain de sacrament de bordel de merde de saloperie de conard d'encule et nique ta mere!

i didn't know you were bi!

/what color to you prefer? time to finally favorite you.

Écoutez votre coeur.


comment ca va?
 
2012-08-28 03:49:28 PM  

puckrock2000: doctorguilty: puckrock2000: Biness: mon dieu!

scare bleu!

Dijion!

Fromage!

Tabarnac!

LATRINE!

/ hanging out with Chevalier, Montage, Detente, Avant Garde, and Deja Vu
// obscure?

You forgot Chocolate Mousse and Hillary.

/it means "woman whose bosoms defy gravity"


It all sounds like some bad movie.

(looks at the camera)
 
2012-08-28 03:53:19 PM  

dofus: You really have to respect the Canadians. They discuss this sort of thing in a more or less civilized fashion and one expects that they would all abide by whatever the outcome is. The last time the US went down this path, 600,000 people died.


I told you we are hardcore!
 
2012-08-28 03:53:37 PM  

mcsestretch: puckrock2000: doctorguilty: puckrock2000: Biness: mon dieu!

scare bleu!

Dijion!

Fromage!

Tabarnac!

LATRINE!

/ hanging out with Chevalier, Montage, Detente, Avant Garde, and Deja Vu
// obscure?

You forgot Chocolate Mousse and Hillary.

/it means "woman whose bosoms defy gravity"

It all sounds like some bad movie.

(looks at the camera)


"I'm pleased to meet you. My name's Nick."
"Nick? What does that mean?"
"Oh, nothing. My dad thought of it while he was shaving."
 
2012-08-28 04:20:42 PM  
I don't care enough to look up any particulars, but if they were to secede, what does Quebec do about things like "national" defense? Currency? Who's automatically a citizen and who has to apply to live in their country? Plus a million other details.....Seems like they haven't thought this brilliant plan through very well....
 
2012-08-28 04:24:39 PM  
Ice cream de tous les Dieux!

/obscure
 
2012-08-28 04:37:06 PM  
As a life long Quebecer, I can say 2 things with absolute certainty.

1) We will not separate, even with a PQ majority. That time has passed, and the farther we get from '95, the less old school nationalists we have. You're more than likely to meet a young, french speaking Quebecer who is dying to learn English than a hardcore francophone who wants English abolished.

2) There is nothing quite like sleeping with a french girl. I wouldn't marry one, but yeah...
 
2012-08-28 04:48:31 PM  
If they secede can we somehow work out an international agreement prohibiting them from wearing speedos at the beaches in Cape Cod?
 
2012-08-28 04:54:39 PM  

Beaver Knievel: If they secede can we somehow work out an international agreement prohibiting them from wearing speedos at the beaches in Cape Cod?


The Treaty for the Prevention of Littoral Grape-Smuggling.
 
2012-08-28 05:00:57 PM  

edgesrealm: phojo1946: The idea of Quebec seceeding from Canada is particularly attractive to the US because once it occurs, Canada will break apart and guess who will be therre to pick up the pieces...you're too smart for me...right...Uncle Sam and we will have new states in the union and new sources of natural resources to plunder. It was believed that the parts of Canada would not be strong enough to make a go of it on their own and would go into negotiations with the US to unite with us. It might take a few years to happen but eventually it would. Just think of all the oil, iron, etc that would be available around our new northern border on the Arctic Circle. And we wouldn't have to fire a single shot to make it happen.

Hey, hey, keep that Manifest Destiny talk out of here or we'll burn down your White House again.

// LOL...
// Or attempt to, but we wouldn't get past the snipers or Secret Service.


You weren't a country until about 50 years later :-P

India didn't win WWII!
 
2012-08-28 05:02:31 PM  
i.chzbgr.com
 
2012-08-28 05:07:06 PM  

montreal_medic: subsetzero: Them Quebecois are a proud folk. Very family oriented. They often post their family name on signs on their front lawn.

Just the other day I drove through the West Island of Montreal.

Seems like every other house had a sign that said A VENDRE

That's one big family!

I wish! I'm trying to move there, but the prices haven't come down much yet


Just wait until the PQ gets in. There will be many homes for sale in the West Island, I suspect.
 
2012-08-28 05:13:05 PM  

the_sidewinder: "The Parti Quebecois (PQ) complains that Quebec does not make enough from rich reserves of iron, zinc, nickel, copper and gold and wants to force mining firms to pay higher royalties. It also plans to make it harder for foreign firms to take over Quebec companies.
It will strengthen already tough language laws to ensure French dominates, and promises a third referendum on splitting off from Canada when the time is right."

Good luck with that profitability thing


That and Quebec totally farked Newfoundland by buying out their power plans and totally jacked them hard. Then they went and got some phone lines so that anyone building anything on those lines pays big. They are a bunch of way-too-proud-for-little-to-no-accomplishments types that think the world should bend to their rules. Total dogshiat. They can go independent and try to deal with Canada like a foreign nation. See how that works out.
 
2012-08-28 05:14:22 PM  
catson

Because it is none of their farking business.

As a québécois, I hope the referendum will succeed and we will become a sovereign and prosperous nation, while all the foreigners and the rest of Canada can go suck cock.


Why do you guys want to split off so bad anyway? Besides this apparent streak of "fark anglophones".
 
2012-08-28 05:21:04 PM  

catson: madcan34: Why doesn't the rest of the country have a vote to see if they can stay?

Because it is none of their farking business.

As a québécois, I hope the referendum will succeed and we will become a sovereign and prosperous nation, while all the foreigners and the rest of Canada can go suck cock.


HAHAHAHH!!! HAHAHHA!!! HAHAHA !!! Wait is this for reals?
 
2012-08-28 05:24:34 PM  

Highroller48: -A vote for separation would trigger massive federal granting of all pending Indian land claims prior to secession, cutting the size of Quebec by about 75%.


I remember what happened the last time Canada granted concessions to Indian tribes before another sovereign nation took over. The Chippewa and Potawatomi remember, too.

\They received Jacksonian democracy
 
2012-08-28 05:32:46 PM  

Highroller48: These dipshiats make me ashamed to be 1/2 Quebecois.

What a bunch of self-deluded fools. You see, most separatists call for "sovereignty-association", in other words, independence from Ottawa but still keeping all the benefits of confederation. Problem: That's not up to them, it's up to us, and they're kidding themselves if they think they're going to be allowed to choose anyting other than "you're in or you're out".

What separatists don't realize is that public opinion would turn the tide very quickly into something like this:

-When they left they'd have to pay off their entire per-capita share of the national debt.
-A vote for separation would trigger massive federal granting of all pending Indian land claims prior to secession, cutting the size of Quebec by about 75%.
-All federal assets, including infrastructure, that aren't removed would have to be purchased by the province.
-Quebec would be left completely wihtout a military force of any kind, as all personnel and equipment would be removed.
-Quebec would have to join NAFTA or negotiate a separate trade deal with Canada, otherwise their status would be no different than, say, Botswana.
-Quebec would no longer be entitled to any current federal funding of any programs or projects.
-Any person who wished to retain Canadian citizenship would have the legal right to do so, creating a sub-community with divided loyalties within the province.
-Industries would be given huge tax and other incentives to relocate out of Quebec and remain in Canada proper.
-The federal government would freeze any Quebec assets under its control until all monies owed were paid in full.
-Quebec would not be able to use Canadian currency, throwing their financial markets into utter chaos.
-Their tax base of well under 10 million people is simply not big neough to sustain all the new responsibilities a "federal" Quebec government would suddenly have.

There are others, but perhaps the biggest consequence of separation would be this: O ...


SO MUCH THIS. Please, let them try on their own for say a decade, and when they got nothing, let them come crawling back to HUGE penalties?
 
2012-08-28 06:08:22 PM  
It has nothing to do with separatism and everything to do with the student strike. Really, none of you know about it? Repeated quarter million -turnout rallies, classes canceled, thousands of people fighting police (and sometimes winning)? Yes? No?
 
2012-08-28 06:08:35 PM  
What would happen probably is after a few weeks some Germans from who knows where will march in and the faux frogs will surrender.
 
2012-08-28 06:27:50 PM  

Huntceet: What would happen probably is after a few weeks some Germans from who knows where will march in and the faux frogs will surrender.


Nice of you to go full retard for our entertainment like that.
 
2012-08-28 06:31:30 PM  
RanDomino
It has nothing to do with separatism and everything to do with the student strike. Really, none of you know about it? Repeated quarter million -turnout rallies, classes canceled, thousands of people fighting police (and sometimes winning)? Yes? No?

There are signs up on campus here promoting solidarity. Fortunately nobody's personally asked me to support the strike, so I haven't had to swear at anyone.

Tellingly, the anglophone universities have gone back, but the francophone ones are still out.

Quitcherbloody whining and get your entitled asses back in the classroom. $300 and this is the response? It's a good thing the poor little dears weren't in BC when the tuition freeze came off. The shock and apoplexy might have killed them.
 
2012-08-28 06:43:08 PM  

ttc2301: "Only thing worse than a Frenchman is a Frenchman who lives in Canada."
-- Ted Nugent


Also, you do realize that Ted Nugent is a self-admitted pedophile, right? Well maybe you don't find that as shocking as I do.
 
2012-08-28 06:50:04 PM  
Oui, c'est la merde nouveau.
www.blogcdn.com
 
2012-08-28 07:07:44 PM  

RanDomino: It has nothing to do with separatism and everything to do with the student strike. Really, none of you know about it? Repeated quarter million -turnout rallies, classes canceled, thousands of people fighting police (and sometimes winning)? Yes? No?


Yes. Sounded staggeringly stupid--the fight was over a small fee rise or something. And they actually had "student unions" who prevented students who wanted to go to class from doing so.
 
2012-08-28 07:08:16 PM  

the7dead: catson: madcan34: Why doesn't the rest of the country have a vote to see if they can stay?

Because it is none of their farking business.
As a québécois, I hope the referendum will succeed and we will become a sovereign and prosperous nation, while all the foreigners and the rest of Canada can go suck cock.

HAHAHAHH!!! HAHAHHA!!! HAHAHA !!! Wait is this for reals?


Considering a good chunk of my tax dollars goes into Quebec's pockets, it is my goddamn business. When you stop sucking up billions of our tax dollars and actually take some goddamn responsibility for yourselves, I will stay out of your business. Until then, TS!

//comment applies only to the ignorant douchbages of that province.
 
2012-08-28 07:43:31 PM  

rkane1: As a former Quebec resident and a fluent Acadian francophone, I say good riddance.

The victim culture in Quebec is like nothing I've ever seen.

There is nothing in the world that a hard-lined quebecer likes better than to blame someone else for their woes.

If they actually separate, and force all the anglos out, then they'll have no one left to blame. Only once this happens might they actually develop a culture worth saving.


Spoken like someone who actually knows un peu about La Belle Provence...
 
2012-08-28 08:40:34 PM  

miss diminutive: Andrew Wiggin: miss diminutive: Biness: Bondith: doctorguilty: puckrock2000: Biness: mon dieu!

scare bleu!

Dijion!

Fromage!

Tabarnac!

LATRINE!

Pamplemousse!

Deja vu!

Maudit de chrisse de putain de sacrament de bordel de merde de saloperie de conard d'encule et nique ta mere!

i didn't know you were bi!

/what color to you prefer? time to finally favorite you.

Écoutez votre coeur.


Dressage!
 
Displayed 50 of 166 comments

First | « | 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | » | Last | Show all

View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest


This thread is archived, and closed to new comments.

Continue Farking
Submit a Link »
On Twitter






In Other Media


  1. Links are submitted by members of the Fark community.

  2. When community members submit a link, they also write a custom headline for the story.

  3. Other Farkers comment on the links. This is the number of comments. Click here to read them.

  4. Click here to submit a link.

Report