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(Times of Israel)   Israel: "Mess with us and you'll suffer the wrath of American military. What? That's what I said. Israeli military, No, I'm pretty sure I said Israeli military. Well, that's what I meant"   (timesofisrael.com) divider line 42
    More: Sad, american military, Americans, Quds Force, IDF, Benjamin Netanyahu, Israelis, Shaul Mofaz, foreign ministers  
•       •       •

15867 clicks; posted to Main » on 22 Aug 2012 at 8:07 PM (2 years ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



Voting Results (Funniest)
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest


Archived thread
2012-08-22 08:24:44 PM
4 votes:

KimNorth: I hope not because then Obama will declare a state of emergency and marshal law and stop the November election then we will all die under communistic Marxism.


Well, you guys will. I'm a black guy. So I've been assigned to Sector 8G and when the signal is given I am to assist in rounding up all the white-....

Hold on a second. Phone's ringing.

Er, yeah, never mind. HA! Kidding. It was a joke.

Yes. A.... joke.
2012-08-22 11:45:32 PM
3 votes:
xtupload.com

Dance, clown, dance! 
2012-08-22 09:19:12 PM
3 votes:
Come to think of it, for all we know, Iran has skittles.
2012-08-22 08:22:06 PM
3 votes:

gilgigamesh: Israel's Channel 10 News claimed on Monday night that Prime Minister Benjamin Netanyahu "is determined to attack Iran before the US elections," and that Israel is now "closer than ever" to a strike designed to thwart Iran's nuclear drive.

The report added that Netanyahu and Defense Minister Ehud Barak believe President Barack Obama would have no choice but to give backing for an Israeli attack before the US presidential elections in November.

/Not Subby


I hope not because then Obama will declare a state of emergency and marshal law and stop the November election then we will all die under communistic Marxism.
2012-08-22 08:14:37 PM
3 votes:

AverageAmericanGuy: Ehud Barak

Barak Hussein Obama

COINCIDENCE??


Wait a minute... Dick Sargent... Dick York... Sergeant York!
2012-08-22 08:11:28 PM
3 votes:
Ehud Barak

Barak
Hussein Obama

COINCIDENCE??
2012-08-22 09:51:48 PM
2 votes:

StoneColdAtheist: Reads TFH...says WFT...*clicks on link*

Facepalm. Guys...GUYS!?

Did any of you even read TFA?* Benny's comments "at the annual memorial to the casualties of the Golani Brigade" are the equivalent of the US Army's 101st Screaming Eagles commanding general's comments every June 6th when they commemorate and remember the sacrifices of D-Day.

It was not a prelude to war.

Besides, have some of you guys even looked at a map? It's a thousand farking miles from Israel to Iran with two bloody-minded anti-Israeli armies in the way, and Israel has virtually no force projection capacity. The ONLY thing they could do is try an F-15 raid on the surface facilities, which would do nothing to Iran's nuclear program anyway.

In short, they'd love to have the US take out Iran, but they can not and will not do it themselves.

* - insert [areyounewhere?.jpg]


Crack that Nuke
Give Iran a slip
Step on a crack
Break your momma's back

When a problem comes along
You must Nuke it
Before the cream sets out too long
You must Nuke it
When something's goin' wrong
You must Nuke it

Now whip it Into shape
Shape it up
Get straight
Go forward
Move ahead

Try to radiate it
It's not too late
To Nuke it
Nuke it good

When a good time turns around
You must Nuke it
You will never live it down
Unless you Nuke it
No one gets away
Until they Nuke it

I say Nuke it
Nuke it good
I say Nuke it
Nuke it good

Crack that Nuke
Give Iran a slip

Step on a crack Break ImadinnerJacket's back
When a problem comes along
You must Nuke it
Before the cream sets out too long
You must Nuke it
When something's goin' wrong

You must Nuke it
Now Nuke it
Into Hell
Shape it up
Get straight
Go forward
Move ahead
Try to radiate it
It's not too late
To Nuke it Into shape
Shape it up
Get straight
Go forward
Move ahead
Try to radiate it
It's not too late
To Nuke it
Well, Nuke it good
2012-08-22 08:59:11 PM
2 votes:
static.igossip.com
2012-08-22 08:44:43 PM
2 votes:

gilgigamesh: KimNorth: I hope not because then Obama will declare a state of emergency and marshal law and stop the November election then we will all die under communistic Marxism.

Well, you guys will. I'm a black guy. So I've been assigned to Sector 8G and when the signal is given I am to assist in rounding up all the white-....

Hold on a second. Phone's ringing.

Er, yeah, never mind. HA! Kidding. It was a joke.

Yes. A.... joke.


Wait, wait wait wait. Stop the thread, stop the arguing, this is serious.

...there are BLACK PEOPLE on FARK?!
2012-08-22 08:34:54 PM
2 votes:
Maybe I am just some dumb shiat, but why do we give Israel anything in the first place?
All they want to do is blow brown people up.. Oh, nevermind.
2012-08-22 08:28:47 PM
2 votes:
As a protest, Iran promises to only watch NCIS re-runs before Ziva.
2012-08-22 08:17:44 PM
2 votes:
Israel as an ally is like having a little brother who goes around bullying and picking fights, and when someone dares to fight back, comes running to you and tells you to go beat up that kid for him.

Maybe this time we should sit this one out if Israel wants to attack Iran. We certainly don't want any of our Naval ships to be mistaken for the enemy and shot full of holes THIS time, do we? ;)
2012-08-22 08:15:41 PM
2 votes:

Bith Set Me Up: AverageAmericanGuy: Ehud Barak

Barak Hussein Obama

COINCIDENCE??

Wait a minute... Dick Sargent... Dick York... Sergeant York!


We're through the looking glass here, people.
2012-08-22 07:41:11 PM
2 votes:
jaypgreene.files.wordpress.com

/I usually submit this as a joke :/
2012-08-23 05:08:48 PM
1 votes:

muck4doo:
The hate in your head is thick. Not only do you hate Jews, but Texans too. What a sad little life you lead.


Awww, you think you're worth hating lol keep dreaming, kid. I just feel a little sorry for you, like any mentally handicapped child I pass in the mall that reeks of the crap in its pants. But no, not hate. My hate is wayyyyy to valuable to be wasted on Texans or Israel.
2012-08-23 01:25:43 PM
1 votes:
israel is afraid of a truly balanced, level, playing field.

that is why your friends are made to suffer.
2012-08-23 01:01:11 AM
1 votes:

RanDomino: consider this
Guess that doesn't apply to the Jews, right?

At this point, it's like the American theft of Indian land- the original criminals and victims are largely dead, and now there are a lot of people who are living on stolen land through no fault of their own; it wouldn't be fair to kick them out either, and the people who would have inherited it don't know it personally either. So it's fair that practically all of Israel proper and probably most of the settlements should stay the way they are, since it's been a generation or two. But the most recent settlements, from the last decade at the very least, should definitely be removed.


muck4doo
RanDomino is a racist tard that has been p[otsing this kind of crap for years, and needs to be called for the Nazi he is.

I'm an Anarchist- I mainly only care about power relations. Israel overwhelmingly has the power in this situation. Any way you slice it the Palestinians are the victims here. The ethnic cleansing and land grab is nothing but a Primitive Accumulation for a civilization and economy that has run out of legitimately productive activities and has to resort to mass robbery. Sorry if you don't like being called out.


I've see your posts for years. the answer is no. You are a straight up Jew hater that hides behind the "I'm just an anti-zionist" flag. We know you blame the jews for bringing their own problems in them and such, including rockets from gaza, but you aren't fooling anyone other than the racist idiots like yourself here on fark. Racist tards like yourself are just like the racists who say "I don't hate black people, I hate n******". Search out some day why you are such a hateful douche.
2012-08-23 12:55:50 AM
1 votes:
memedepot.com
I love you all. At least at this moment.
2012-08-23 12:43:33 AM
1 votes:
fatalvenom
the Jews

All of them, yeah?

OMG...someone can hate people.

The agony!?!?!?!?


Yes, that does in fact make you a terrible person.


yagottabefarkinkiddinme
They may be 100% correct as Iranian leaders keep saying just that.

they say they want nuclear power for civilian purposes only = ignore what they say
they say they want to destroy Israel = everything they say is true

we would lose an ally most likely forever

Worst. Ally. Ever.

The hundreds of thousands of people that could potentially die in such a situation, that's a problem, though.
2012-08-23 12:42:31 AM
1 votes:

fatalvenom: consider this: The Germans and the Russians kicked Latvia's ass so this guy hates the Jews. Sounds logical.

If it wasnt for the Jews, the Germans would probably have never invaded and then the Russians wouldn't have been provoked into more slaughter.


Because the Germans totally weren't out to take over all of Europe and eventually the world.
2012-08-23 12:38:29 AM
1 votes:

consider this: The Germans and the Russians kicked Latvia's ass so this guy hates the Jews. Sounds logical.


If it wasnt for the Jews, the Germans would probably have never invaded and then the Russians wouldn't have been provoked into more slaughter.
2012-08-23 12:31:01 AM
1 votes:
BolloxReader
Oh, and I want to point out that all of this could have been avoided if Great Britain had granted the Palestinians independence following WWI as had been promised in exchange for rising up against the Ottomans. Then nobody would have been able to establish Israel by kicking out natives and turning them into refugees and pissing off everyone else.

Creating bloody and intractable religious conflicts was the imperial strategy for keeping the natives too busy fighting each other to have time to fight their rulers; later, it served in former colonies for making sure their victims would never be inclined to seek revenge.


RandomRandom
Add all this up and it becomes very clear that Israel is completely full of shiat.

By all indications they've got themselves so psyched up that at this point if they don't try then they'll look like just as much of fools. Why choose a path with a 100% chance of humiliation (i.e. not attacking) when there is a path with only a 95% chance?


dr_blasto
Indifferent attitude to the slaughter of civilians, including women and children, through the deployment and use of modern, highly efficient weapons with highly accurate targeting and control systems

That doesn't even really matter. The real issue is that Israel has absolute territorial and military control. Israel is the power here. There is literally nothing that the Palestinians can do that will cause Israel to remove the settlers, checkpoints, border controls, blockades etc and otherwise allow Palestine to be a viable state where people have at least a chance of living with some kind of basic dignity. Israelis complaining about anything Palestinians do against them is like a 5th grader holding down a 2nd grader and complaining that he'shiatting back.


consider this
Yeah, if only they had somewhere else to go.

lol at anything east of Iraq being considered "Arab".

People want to live in their home, not some random patch of rock a thousand miles away.

the people that have launched over 9,000 rockets at them in the past 10 years

The civilian population = the terrorists, eh? By that logic, because of settler attacks on Palestinian civilians, every Israeli should be considered a terrorist too, right?


muck4doo
Where is your outrage when Hamas sends rockets into Israel?

Let me know when Hamas carpets Israel in checkpoints, demolishes Israeli airports and power plants, restricts Israeli access to water, sequesters Israelis into isolated ghettoes that require intentionally excessively circuitous routes to pass between, denies Israel access to the Mediterranean, arrests members of the Knesset, arbitrarily denies Israelis building permits and sends in the bulldozers when they build anyway, and allows Palestinians to illegally take over apartment blocks in Tel Aviv and protects them with thousands of soldiers. Then I will give a fark.
2012-08-23 12:17:41 AM
1 votes:

RoyBatty: danielscissorhands: The prevalence of mental illness online is just outstanding. All these people who don't have the confidence to say this stuff in person because they know they'll get their asses handed to them just go online and spout it for attention.

Very seriously I have to admit that I admire fatalvenom's courage or his understanding that nothing will happen to him for spouting these views.

He puts in his profile plenty of stuff to identify him in real life including name, location, pictures, and then comes online and just spews this crap.

I keep my profile as clean as can be, and am always sweating someone will figure out who I am, and then take as honorable, virtuous positions as I can (and still FARKERS like GAT_00 compare me to a North Korean diplomat).

This is one reason I think I am glad FARK and other sites like this exist, so that the fatalvenoms can come out and express themselves and we can all see that anti-semitism really ain't dead.

But it's scary.


The untreated mental illness is a lot scarier.
2012-08-23 12:03:42 AM
1 votes:

consider this: Should have known you were a Arab with your disgusting attitude.


It must be nice to be not racist like you.
2012-08-22 11:55:49 PM
1 votes:
WTF? Take 2...

Also, I don't see what OJ has to do with this...

images.cheezburger.com
2012-08-22 11:49:29 PM
1 votes:
There is considerable opposition to an Israeli strike on Iran's nuclear facilities, the report noted - with President Shimon Peres, the army's chief of the General Staff and top generals, the intelligence community, opposition leader Shaul Mofaz, "and of course the Americans" all lined up against Israeli action at this stage.

Shimon Peres said in a statement, condemning any sudden action:

"And Iran... Iran so far away."
2012-08-22 11:43:25 PM
1 votes:
Jews got holocausted. I think Americans should stand shoulder to shoulder with these victims to prove once and for all that white people are innocent of all crimes comitted against these impoverished, innocent and unjustley victomized people. The people of Israel are constantly under attack. You see it everywhere, Katusha rockets, suicide bombings, kidnappings, you name it.

The State Of Israel has been in existance for over TWO THOUSAND YEARS and yet the rags wan't them out now? Truly this is a case of muslum extremism gone awry.

Americans! Stand with the Jews! Or by God, freedom will disapeare faster than CNN ratings.
2012-08-22 11:31:03 PM
1 votes:

dr_blasto: beta_plus: I love how Fark Anti-Semite Libs think that poor weak mean Israel only exists with America's support through somehow magically manipulating our chaotic electoral system.

Did it ever occur to you jew haters that all America does is try to get Israel to hold back?

They wouldn't fall without us. They'd wipe their neighbors and Iran out.

/you can thank the French for giving them 200+ nukes

How much military aid do we supply Israel with annually? Are you so incredibly stupid that you think they could sustain their own military-industrial-complex on their GDP?

Clearly, though, you think that calling out Israel for being assholes when they're, you know, actually being assholes about something is anti-semitic.

You know, you seem to think so little of our Jewish friends in the middle east that you believe they can't take even a little constructive criticism. Maybe you're the anti-semite. Are you one of those end of the world god-botherer types that's praying for the destruction of Israel to bring you to the End Times? Maybe this is more of your stupid "MY TEAM RIGHT OR WRONG" politics.

Maybe you've succumbed to some kind of TBI and I'm just picking on a disabled person who isn't in full control of their faculties. I guess that'd make me the dick.

Which is it, beta_plus?


Actually, they did just fine on their GDP defending themselves without our help until 1973, when they stupidly did not buy enough bullets for a few years. You know why we bailed them out? Because they prepped all of their nuclear weapon delivery vehicles right when out spy satellites could see them. I'll let you guess what message they were trying to send.

We weren't saving Israel then and we are not now. We were (are) saving the millions who live(d) in Cairo, Damascus, Baghdad, Riyadh, Mecca, Medina, and possibly back then Odessa, Kiev, and (assuming a blatant suicide mission wasn't out of the question and they had put some aces up their sleeve) Moscow. They don't really need our support. They'll happily take it - why pay for things when you don't have to? But they'd be fine if we cut them off completely.

Oh, but evil Jewish Israel is full of hate towards Iranians because evil Jews are all racist:

"Our dear Imam (referring to Ayatollah Khomeini) said that the occupying regime must be wiped off the map and this was a very wise statement. We cannot compromise over the issue of Palestine. Is it possible to create a new front in the heart of an old front. This would be a defeat and whoever accepts the legitimacy of this regime has in fact, signed the defeat of the Islamic world. Our dear Imam targeted the heart of the world oppressor in his struggle, meaning the occupying regime. I have no doubt that the new wave that has started in Palestine, and we witness it in the Islamic world too, will eliminate this disgraceful stain from the Islamic world." - Mahmoud Ahmadinejad, leader of Iran

B-B-B-But he didn't say Israel, so it's OK! Israel is just pretending to feel threatened because they will take over the oil in collusion with the Rothschilds!

/maybe you should try reading some history books not by Howard Zinn and Noam Chomsky and newspapers besides the Guardian
//you should try to expand your mind but I know your knee jerk hatred of jews is so much easier
2012-08-22 10:42:25 PM
1 votes:

Linkster:

Crack that Nuke
Give Iran a slip
Step on a crack
Break your momma's back

When a problem comes along
You must Nuke it
Before the cream sets out too long
You must Nuke it
When something's goin' wrong
You must Nuke it

Now whip it Into shape
Shape it up
Get straight
Go forward
Move ahead

Try to radiate it
It's not too late
To Nuke it
Nuke it good

When a good time turns around
You must Nuke it
You will never live it down
Unless you Nuke it
No one gets away
Until they Nuke it

I say Nuke it
Nuke it good
I say Nuke it
Nuke it good

Crack that Nuke
Give Iran a slip

Step on a crack Break ImadinnerJacket's back
When a problem comes along
You must Nuke it
Before the cream sets out too long
You must Nuke it
When something's goin' wrong

You must Nuke it
Now Nuke it
Into Hell
Shape it up
Get straight
Go forward
Move ahead
Try to radiate it
It's not too late
To Nuke it Into shape
Shape it up
Get straight
Go forward
Move ahead
Try to radiate it
It's not too late
To Nuke it
Well, Nuke it good


Odd. I really want to microwave a burrito right now.

BRB.
2012-08-22 10:17:55 PM
1 votes:
Well, I see the anti-semite label has been thrown around, and a random picture of female IDF soldiers has been posted, so this is almost an official Israeli thread on Fark. Just need a certain someone to show up and say hi. Damn it, let me try and page him.
2012-08-22 09:28:41 PM
1 votes:

Gyrfalcon: Maybe we don't like EITHER ONE OF THEM, you ever consider that?


No way. It's an entirely black & white world. You're either good or evil. Also, you have to pick sides. If two assholes want to rip each other to shreds, make a decision on who you think is a slightly lesser asshole, and you arm and fund the sh*t out of them. They will totally thank you for it and always act in our best national interests in the future. Trust me.
2012-08-22 09:20:06 PM
1 votes:
Well, it's pretty much what Romney promised Israel. No word on whether the "secret" meeting with MI6 covered the same topic. If he can get us into a war before even taking office, he'll have won his bet with Bush.
2012-08-22 09:07:08 PM
1 votes:
The only winners in war are the dead, for they no longer have to put up with their leader's trivialities.
2012-08-22 08:58:53 PM
1 votes:

AverageAmericanGuy: conjecture and hearsay: Jews tend to be annoying?

That's pretty defamatory. Are you some kind of anti-semite or something?


Meh, lived in Montreal then new York. I am more anti- annoying.
2012-08-22 08:56:34 PM
1 votes:
Like we still have a military.
2012-08-22 08:36:51 PM
1 votes:
For some reason I would find it hard to feel threatened by a grown man who goes by Benny
2012-08-22 08:36:08 PM
1 votes:

RogermcAllen: gilgigamesh: Israel's Channel 10 News claimed on Monday night that Prime Minister Benjamin Netanyahu "is determined to attack Iran before the US elections," and that Israel is now "closer than ever" to a strike designed to thwart Iran's nuclear drive.

The report added that Netanyahu and Defense Minister Ehud Barak believe President Barack Obama would have no choice but to give backing for an Israeli attack before the US presidential elections in November.

/Not Subby

This sounds like bad news...
...for Romney.

You can't vote out a wartime president, that would be unpatriotic.

/why do Republicans hate America?

You can't vote out a wartime president, that would be unpatriotic.

Oh sure you can. I think it would be a huge mistake for him to back an attack on Iran. The 50% that think an attack is appropriate have no intention of voting for him in the first place. The other 50% would see him propping up the Israeli machine keeping the Palestine people down.

Of course, it's a no-win situation. If the Israeli's go in and lose, other allies will question our resolve to help with the chips are down. If they go in and win, other allies will question whether they need our help at all.

/why do Republicans hate America?
For the same reason Democrats do. They both hate the 50% of the country that doesn't completely agree with them.
2012-08-22 08:33:37 PM
1 votes:
img855.imageshack.us
2012-08-22 08:26:40 PM
1 votes:
Just sayin': it's hard for me to take seriously a General officer named "Benny".
2012-08-22 08:24:33 PM
1 votes:
The only army Netanyahu needs is the army of "American" media personalities, led by Wolf Blitzer, who will sell American blood, yet again.
2012-08-22 08:20:04 PM
1 votes:
War has changed. It's no longer about nations, ideologies, or ethnicity. It's an endless series of proxy battles fought by mercenaries and machines. War - and its consumption of life - has become a well-oiled machine. War has changed. ID-tagged soldiers carry ID-tagged weapons, use ID-tagged gear. Nanomachines inside their bodies enhance and regulate their abilities. Genetic control. Information control. Emotion control. Battlefield control. Everything is monitored and kept under control. War has changed. The age of deterrence has become the age of control... All in the name of averting catastrophe from weapons of mass destruction. And he who controls the battlefield... controls history. War has changed. When the battlefield is under total control... War becomes routine.
2012-08-22 08:18:01 PM
1 votes:

gilgigamesh: Israel's Channel 10 News claimed on Monday night that Prime Minister Benjamin Netanyahu "is determined to attack Iran before the US elections," and that Israel is now "closer than ever" to a strike designed to thwart Iran's nuclear drive.

The report added that Netanyahu and Defense Minister Ehud Barak believe President Barack Obama would have no choice but to give backing for an Israeli attack before the US presidential elections in November.

/Not Subby


This sounds like bad news...
...for Romney.

You can't vote out a wartime president, that would be unpatriotic.

/why do Republicans hate America?
 
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