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(Some Guy Named Stu)   If your erection lasts more than three days, DO NOT put a bag of ice on it, wait in your car and hope for the best   (stunewslaguna.com) divider line 74
    More: PSA, glass  
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13839 clicks; posted to Main » on 21 Aug 2012 at 6:19 PM (2 years ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2012-08-21 05:20:53 PM  
Came for gruesome ending involving angle grinder, leaving disappointed.
 
2012-08-21 06:20:54 PM  
That's not normal?
 
2012-08-21 06:21:24 PM  
just take a friggin sudafed
how stupid are people these days

there's a drug for everything.

including ZZZquill which is shots of pure alcohol sold in the medicine aisle
just kidding its just Benadryl
 
2012-08-21 06:22:11 PM  
I know it would be scary, but damn, how do the bolt cutters not come out after Hour 12?
 
2012-08-21 06:22:44 PM  
Good idea,
 
2012-08-21 06:24:22 PM  
cdn2.hark.com

I'm calling a hooker!
 
2012-08-21 06:24:55 PM  
"He was provided privacy and used a tube of lubricating jelly to successfully remove the ring."

*cue wakka-wakka music"
 
2012-08-21 06:26:55 PM  
Superman, man of steel..

/ring
 
2012-08-21 06:27:19 PM  
My favorite part FTFA:Editor's Note: The ad says "after four hours - not four days..."

*snicker*
 
2012-08-21 06:27:38 PM  
So in the end it came off with some privacy and KY? And it took him 3 DAYS AND ADVICE FROM A COP to finally try that?

Stupidity, thy name is that guy.
 
2012-08-21 06:30:32 PM  

jayhawk88: I know it would be scary, but damn, how do the bolt cutters not come out after Hour 12?


I had a friend who was an ER nurse. She had a story about an old guy who came in with one of those things stuck on his peener. They actually did bring in the fire department and the bolt cutters.

The metal ones are just asking for trouble. I'll stick with elastic or leather snap-ons, thanks.


He was provided privacy and used a tube of lubricating jelly to successfully remove the ring.

Maybe that should have been the first thing he tried?
 
2012-08-21 06:31:08 PM  

El_Smack: ... And it took him 3 DAYS AND ADVICE FROM A COP to finally try that?


Well, cops are the authority on such matters.
 
2012-08-21 06:31:15 PM  
Same guy. Same risky behaviour. Just a little older.

gothamist.com
 
2012-08-21 06:32:07 PM  

BarkingUnicorn: Came for gruesome ending involving angle grinder, leaving disappointed.


Not going to wait for the Dremel Tool ad featuring this issue.
 
2012-08-21 06:32:23 PM  
El_Smack:

So in the end it came off with some privacy and KY? And it took him 3 DAYS AND ADVICE FROM A COP to finally try that?

And somebody mentioned Sudafed already.

Now I feel so redundant.
 
2012-08-21 06:32:42 PM  
He added that he had taken a "Superman" form of Viagra

Had to look that one up. Looks to be a Viagra/Cialis mix.
 
2012-08-21 06:33:09 PM  
4.bp.blogspot.com

/Instant derection
 
2012-08-21 06:39:20 PM  
Is this a good way to teach some geometry?

Ok kids, you've got this ring which is 2 inches in diameter, a box of superman viagra, and a weekend to kill. The circumference of your junk is ______.

Question: When your weekend is over, what is the angle between the car seat and your engorged shame stick as you turn your head in response to the police knocking on your window?



Bonus: Write out the equation of the shame spiral and draw it.
 
2012-08-21 06:40:01 PM  
You're supposed to go around and fark every hot chick you can find, then you get turned into a hot chick and get farked yourself.

You n00bs need to read more hentai
 
2012-08-21 06:41:13 PM  

Lanadapter: You're supposed to go around and fark every hot chick you can find, then you get turned into a hot chick and get farked yourself.

You n00bs need to read more hentai


What in the hell is "hentai"

Do I want to know?
 
2012-08-21 06:42:07 PM  
Take two kryptonite and call somebody...anybody... else in the morning.

technabob.com
 
2012-08-21 06:43:31 PM  

El_Smack: So in the end it came off with some privacy and KY? And it took him 3 DAYS AND ADVICE FROM A COP to finally try that?

Stupidity, thy name is that guy.


He still had a priapism to deal with.

Still, stupid guy.
 
2012-08-21 06:43:41 PM  
So the article failed to answer the question of whether this dude was legitimately raped nor did they mention how his body dealt with that sort of thing.
 
2012-08-21 06:47:06 PM  
Damn right I'll tell my doctor if it lasts 4 hours.

...and my dentist, my mailman, the neighbors, the people working the counter at the donut shop, that cute waitress at the pizza place....
 
2012-08-21 06:50:12 PM  

Yuri Futanari: What in the hell is "hentai"

Do I want to know?



You're soaking in it.
 
2012-08-21 06:50:35 PM  

Yuri Futanari: Lanadapter: You're supposed to go around and fark every hot chick you can find, then you get turned into a hot chick and get farked yourself.

You n00bs need to read more hentai

What in the hell is "hentai"

Do I want to know?


With a username like that, and asking in your profile for people to not Google it at work, you know quite well what it is.

Nice try ;)
 
2012-08-21 06:55:15 PM  
I could fap furiously with this.
 
2012-08-21 06:55:31 PM  
A few years ago, I had a patient call me on the phone (I'm a hospice nurse) and tell me that he had an erection that had lasted 7 days and was quite painful. He had heard on T.V. that if this kind of thing happened, that he should seek medical help, so he decided to call ME. I too had heard to seek medical help, but as a medical professional, the treatment for this condition had not been shared with me, ever. I had no idea what to do. I eventually sent him to a urologist, but he couldn't do anything much either. It remained a problem until the poor man died.

so sudafed huh? Hopefully this never happens again, but I will keep that in mind.
 
2012-08-21 06:57:02 PM  
Duly noted.
 
2012-08-21 06:58:17 PM  
Came for the Obamacare cure, leaving disappernted.
 
2012-08-21 06:58:24 PM  
Read "erection" as "election". Thought this was gonna be a weird as hell Akin thread.

/Am disappoint.
 
2012-08-21 07:01:00 PM  
PSA: Make sure the cock ring has an appropriate diameter to prevent stuff like this. That's what grandma always said.
 
2012-08-21 07:01:17 PM  

Yuri Futanari: Lanadapter: You're supposed to go around and fark every hot chick you can find, then you get turned into a hot chick and get farked yourself.

You n00bs need to read more hentai

What in the hell is "hentai"

Do I want to know?


I'm so happy we end up in the same threads. Watching people catch on (or not) is hilarious.

/seriously
 
2012-08-21 07:05:15 PM  
media.screened.com

Another satisfied customer.
 
2012-08-21 07:05:39 PM  

jayhawk88: I know it would be scary, but damn, how do the bolt cutters not come out after Hour 12?


Would YOU let anyone near your junk with a pair of bolt cutters?
 
2012-08-21 07:05:48 PM  
I bet a little tiger balm on his nuts would have cleared this right up.
 
2012-08-21 07:05:59 PM  

berylman: PSA: Make sure the cock ring has an appropriate diameter to prevent stuff like this. That's what grandma always said.


Sometimes that's hard to gauge, especially if you're a grower and not a shower.
 
2012-08-21 07:24:23 PM  
Geez, I'm getting old... I WANT my erection to last more than thirty minutes.
 
2012-08-21 07:27:21 PM  
Christ, do I have to do everything?

snl.jt.org
 
2012-08-21 07:32:40 PM  

kidsizedcoffin: I bet a little tiger balm on his nuts would have cleared this right up.


Yeah, learned that after applying some on my shoulder, then unfortunately adjusted my junk.
Will never. Do that. Again.

/not a cool story, brah
 
2012-08-21 07:34:31 PM  
From the editors note on the article, I think the 3 day claim is specious. I think this event happened in a smaller time frame.

Then again, I live in a country with real health care, so perhaps I'm conditioned to seek medical advice sooner than this guy.
 
2012-08-21 07:36:27 PM  

Random Bastage: Geez, I'm getting old... I WANT my erection to last more than thirty minutes.


I've heard your wife say something similar.
 
Biv
2012-08-21 07:37:11 PM  
In this week's heartwarming episode of "Little House on the Prairie."
 
2012-08-21 07:40:46 PM  
The original ads said "...lasting more than 48 hours." They changed it to four hours.
 
2012-08-21 07:47:49 PM  
they need to make freebase viagra for those of us that only need 4 MINUTES
 
2012-08-21 07:53:27 PM  

Littleturtle: A few years ago, I had a patient call me on the phone (I'm a hospice nurse) and tell me that he had an erection that had lasted 7 days and was quite painful. He had heard on T.V. that if this kind of thing happened, that he should seek medical help, so he decided to call ME. I too had heard to seek medical help, but as a medical professional, the treatment for this condition had not been shared with me, ever. I had no idea what to do. I eventually sent him to a urologist, but he couldn't do anything much either. It remained a problem until the poor man died.

so sudafed huh? Hopefully this never happens again, but I will keep that in mind.


I heard it's pretty godawful to look at because they use a large needle to drain the blood. Well, it actually probably isn't that painful in itself, esp when you've already got a painful predicament, the problem is the whole "don't stick needles in my junk" thing. And blood...
 
2012-08-21 07:56:52 PM  
i90.photobucket.com

would like a word
 
2012-08-21 07:57:16 PM  
What do you do with a 3-hour erection if you don't have kids?
 
2012-08-21 08:02:12 PM  

Schroedinger's Glory Hole: What do you do with a 3-hour erection if you don't have kids?


images.encyclopediadramatica.se
 
2012-08-21 08:07:13 PM  

Schroedinger's Glory Hole: What do you do with a 3-hour erection if you don't have kids?


The glory holes at the local adult book store and/or extreme masturbation. Just throwing out ideas.
 
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