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(The Consumerist)   Dear Consumerist: My hands tremble as I write to tell you a bottle of White-Out came in its own box separate from other office supplies I ordered. Please let your readers know I'm shaken to my core, but will somehow find the strength to live   (consumerist.com) divider line 175
    More: Stupid, superhuman strength, heart, wage slaves  
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19188 clicks; posted to Main » on 21 Aug 2012 at 2:27 PM (2 years ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2012-08-21 05:12:22 PM  

Aarontology: Ten bucks says that when they placed their order, there was a section or prompt that said "Some items may ship at other times separate from the main order due to *insert boring as shiat warehouse logistics reason*"


Pretty sure there is an option near the check out to "ship items as they become available" or "ship in fewer shipments". Wonder which one they picked.
 
2012-08-21 05:15:33 PM  
I've used White-Out/Liquid Paper to cover up mistakes in handwritten documents (college essays written in class) and to mark a unmarked speaker knob so I could see what the volume was cranked up to, to cover dings or scratches on a white surface, etc. Any time you need a very small bit of white paint, it's good stuff.
 
2012-08-21 05:23:18 PM  
I worked at a Staples for 6 years through high school and university, so I'm really getting a kick, etc.

We had a delivery center at our store, so I probably know what happened. It could be either one of two things:

1. To save $$$ on boxes, the delivery center uses the store's boxes left over from when it stocks it's shelves. A big box store like Staples doesn't get too many small boxes, so therefore, had to use a bigger one.

2. The most likely answer would be that the employee picking your order had a sense of humor and put a single tiny item in a big box to give themselves, and hopefully the customer, a laugh. I've seen it plenty of times, and have done it once, myself.

Sometimes people picking those orders don't realize that those customers have sandy vaginas, though. And this article is a perfect example. I hope the DC that services this author's area doesn't find out who they are, though. Otherwise every item on their future orders will be drenched in ball sweat.
 
2012-08-21 06:02:17 PM  

Sgt Otter: "Hey, we're out of White-Out."
"Yeah, I know. Just ship the rest of our order and let the Baltimore warehouse know they'll need to cover down to complete the order."

...meanwhile, in Baltimore...

"Hey, these idiots ordered ONE bottle of White-Out."
"So? Lots of our customers only order one case."
"Not one case. One bottle."
"WTF?"
"Do we even have any boxes that small?"
"No, because we assume nobody is that farking stupid."


^THIS^
 
2012-08-21 06:11:02 PM  
This is actually a running gag on Consumerist. "How ridiculous can Amazon/Office Depot/Staples/Wal Mart get with their shipping tricks?" I have seen boxes just as big containing a single Sharpie.
 
2012-08-21 06:15:41 PM  

rhinoguy: This is actually a running gag on Consumerist. "How ridiculous can Amazon/Office Depot/Staples/Wal Mart get with their shipping tricks?" I have seen boxes just as big containing a single Sharpie.


Their piece about HP using a box the size of a server rack to hold 32 pieces of A4 paper, in 16 separate boxes within the outer box was quite amusing.
 
2012-08-21 07:07:11 PM  

MoronLessOff: kiwimoogle84: WarszawaScream: Ffff it happens all the time, I had OfficeMax send me a box of pens in a separate way-too-big box once. It probably shipped from a different warehouse from the rest of the order.

I was very concerned for a second that you had a penis shipped to you. I think I need a new glasses prescription.

Yea. You don't get those shipped. You pick them up at the corner off a blanket. But be sure to wash it off first.


How much did you pay for yours? I hope you didn't pay more than $22. I talked the guy down to $17.
 
2012-08-21 07:11:08 PM  

lake_huron: MoronLessOff: kiwimoogle84: WarszawaScream: Ffff it happens all the time, I had OfficeMax send me a box of pens in a separate way-too-big box once. It probably shipped from a different warehouse from the rest of the order.

I was very concerned for a second that you had a penis shipped to you. I think I need a new glasses prescription.

Yea. You don't get those shipped. You pick them up at the corner off a blanket. But be sure to wash it off first.

How much did you pay for yours? I hope you didn't pay more than $22. I talked the guy down to $17.


Yeah, but did you get anything for the broken toaster oven?
 
2012-08-21 07:21:45 PM  

QueenMamaBee: kiwimoogle84: WarszawaScream: Ffff it happens all the time, I had OfficeMax send me a box of pens in a separate way-too-big box once. It probably shipped from a different warehouse from the rest of the order.

I was very concerned for a second that you had a penis shipped to you. I think I need a new glasses prescription.

A box of penis, actually. Penises? Penii?


I was led to believe that dicks generally came in bags.
 
2012-08-21 08:12:11 PM  
Maybe the white-out refused to travel with the other "inferior" products. Probably just a primadonna bottle.
 
2012-08-21 08:51:17 PM  
Looks like Staples has a White-Out only policy.
 
2012-08-21 08:55:24 PM  
I'm probably just asking to get flamed here, but can anyone tell me when The Consumerist jumped the shark? I remember when it had actual stories of consumers who got fornicated and the efforts to help said consumers.
 
2012-08-21 09:12:04 PM  

Sgt Otter: "Hey, we're out of White-Out."
"Yeah, I know. Just ship the rest of our order and let the Baltimore warehouse know they'll need to cover down to complete the order."

...meanwhile, in Baltimore...

"Hey, these idiots ordered ONE bottle of White-Out."
"So? Lots of our customers only order one case."
"Not one case. One bottle."
"WTF?"
"Do we even have any boxes that small?"
"No, because we assume nobody is that farking stupid."


I LOLd. +1 for probably-being-true.
 
2012-08-21 09:30:35 PM  

My company once ordered a dozen waste baskets from Staples. They could have been nested together and shipped in one box. Instead, they were each packed in their own oversized box, with several cubic feet of air pillows each. It took a random office flunky more than an hour to unpack the boxes, break down eleven of them, deflated the air pillows and bundle all the waste into one box for the cleaning crew to throw out.

/Wasteful packaging is wasteful.

 
2012-08-21 09:36:48 PM  
O.o Dafuq. waste of packing materials.
 
2012-08-21 09:41:20 PM  

poodebunker: Maybe the white-out refused to travel with the other "inferior" products. Probably just a primadonna bottle.


Or a white supremacist that doesn't want to mix with the yellow pencils or the black printer ink.
 
2012-08-21 10:15:46 PM  
It was always fun receiving boxes from customers with crazy packing material in them. Some places would try to be all "green" and would use shredded socks or sweatpants, plastic cookie trays, etc. (basically their garbage):

i895.photobucket.com

Then there was that one time...

i895.photobucket.com
 
2012-08-21 10:27:22 PM  

Cappalotti: It was always fun receiving boxes from customers with crazy packing material in them. Some places would try to be all "green" and would use shredded socks or sweatpants, plastic cookie trays, etc. (basically their garbage):

[i895.photobucket.com image 600x400]

Then there was that one time...

[i895.photobucket.com image 600x420]


They threw away a white woman to send you packing peanuts?
 
2012-08-21 10:38:34 PM  

Mad_Radhu: QueenMamaBee: kiwimoogle84: WarszawaScream: Ffff it happens all the time, I had OfficeMax send me a box of pens in a separate way-too-big box once. It probably shipped from a different warehouse from the rest of the order.

I was very concerned for a second that you had a penis shipped to you. I think I need a new glasses prescription.

A box of penis, actually. Penises? Penii?

I was led to believe that dicks generally came in bags.


Haven't you heard of dick in a box?

http://youtu.be/WhwbxEfy7fg
 
2012-08-21 11:05:34 PM  

Mad_Radhu: poodebunker: Maybe the white-out refused to travel with the other "inferior" products. Probably just a primadonna bottle.

Or a white supremacist that doesn't want to mix with the yellow pencils or the black printer ink.


But the name "white-out" would negate the racist overtone, no? I'm standing with the primadonna bottle.
 
2012-08-22 02:46:14 AM  

FloydA: Fifty bucks he picks his nose


Fifty bucks more says he eats it.
 
2012-08-22 03:45:46 AM  
Just received a netbook in a refrigerator-sized box. A netbook, a refrigerator-sized box, and lots of brown butcher/filler paper -- I'm set for life.
 
2012-08-22 05:09:35 AM  

nelsonal: Loaf's Tray: THE WHITE-OUT CONTAINS POTASSIUM BENZOATE.

(That's bad).

Does it come with sprinkles?


he calls it a "frogort" from episode 1F23
 
2012-08-22 08:49:48 AM  
Offices still use typewriters? It's time to stop writing to the Consumerist and start finding a modern workplace.
 
2012-08-22 02:01:42 PM  
In a boardroom somewhere...

"So these Consumerist people are getting annoying. We can't have this kind of freely available information about all the evil we're perpetrating."

"Astroturf campaign?"

"Maybe, but the online community is savvy now. A straight out disinformation campaign might not work."

"What if we leveraged their collective hipsterism and love of sarcasm?"

"hmm... yes. YES. I've GOT it! We'll start a Fark cliche about stupid, unreasonable consumer complaints posted on consumerist.com. The first debunker crowd will become our PR shield for legitimate reports OVERNIGHT! It's brilliant. BRILLIANT!"
 
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