Do you have adblock enabled?
If you can read this, either the style sheet didn't load or you have an older browser that doesn't support style sheets. Try clearing your browser cache and refreshing the page.

(WPTV)   Former pastor found guilty of teen sex wasn't trying to kill himself in court, he was just making sure his breath was sweet enough for prison   (wptv.com) divider line 19
    More: Followup, found guilty, Palm Beach County Sheriff's Office, suicide attempts, teens, football stars  
•       •       •

8767 clicks; posted to Main » on 14 Aug 2012 at 8:45 AM (2 years ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



19 Comments   (+0 »)
   
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest

Archived thread
 
2012-08-14 08:51:57 AM  
upload.wikimedia.org

maybe he wasn't getting enough RETSYN.
 
2012-08-14 08:52:40 AM  
That this vile POS was convicted by a cricket makes this even better.
 
2012-08-14 08:57:00 AM  
i.imgur.com
 
2012-08-14 08:58:53 AM  

Apos: That this vile POS was convicted by a cricket makes this even better.


images2.wikia.nocookie.net
 
2012-08-14 09:06:00 AM  

ChipNASA: [i.imgur.com image 850x534]


Mentos, the rape maker!
 
2012-08-14 09:10:42 AM  
Thou shalt not troll the court.
 
2012-08-14 09:12:51 AM  
My initial reaction was the same as the one I had at the time this happened

What is this I don't even...
 
2012-08-14 09:13:16 AM  
That little stunt was probably one of the best short-term acts of self preservation he could come up with. Act suicidal, get put on suicide watch. I'd imagine that tends to cut down on the butt-rape for a while.
 
Skr
2012-08-14 09:15:35 AM  

ChipNASA: [i.imgur.com image 850x534]




As long as he doesn't think Mints give him the okay to slide through the back seat of my car.
fc07.deviantart.net
 
2012-08-14 09:17:34 AM  
That's okay, his breath will soon be smelling like asshole and syrup.
 
2012-08-14 09:32:09 AM  
What do you want to bet someone made a bundle by selling him altoids and saying they were poison?
 
2012-08-14 09:32:35 AM  
What an attention whore.

Even if they were pills, taken them in front of about 100 people is such dramatic fashion is not a attempt to kill yourself, it's screaming "LOOK AT ME!"
 
2012-08-14 09:43:46 AM  
How was he convicted by a cricket?
 
2012-08-14 10:01:16 AM  

MythDragon: That's okay, his breath will soon be smelling like asshole and syrup.



I prefer jelly
 
2012-08-14 10:01:26 AM  
Wow, that's probably the douchiest thing ever. At the moment he's convicted, rather than listen to the judge berate him, and get carted out, he swallows a fist full of mints and acts suicidal. They have to stop the proceedings, and he's carried out on a gurney getting all kinds of attention.

Total psycho - it's all about him. I just wish they had caught the manipulative bastard sooner.

May he rot in prision solitary. That's the worst punishment possible for an attention whore sociopath like him: forced to live, but given no attention. No interaction. Nothing. Just him and 4 walls while entropy slowly takes his sight, his hearing, his strength, his mind - and finally, his life.
 
2012-08-14 10:16:33 AM  

MythDragon: That's okay, his breath will soon be smelling like asshole and syrup.


Or Welch's grape jelly. They come in those handy little packets.
 
2012-08-14 10:19:38 AM  
This jerk is still playing the system.
 
2012-08-14 10:44:51 AM  
I see them finding him hung in his cell and will call it suicide even though he will have a broken nose, ribs, arms, legs and neck.
 
2012-08-14 12:58:47 PM  
Because there's nothing worse than getting a BJ from someone with bad breath. Well...almost nothing.
 
Displayed 19 of 19 comments

View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest


This thread is archived, and closed to new comments.

Continue Farking
Submit a Link »
Advertisement
On Twitter





In Other Media


  1. Links are submitted by members of the Fark community.

  2. When community members submit a link, they also write a custom headline for the story.

  3. Other Farkers comment on the links. This is the number of comments. Click here to read them.

  4. Click here to submit a link.

Report