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(NYPost)   It's not news; It's CNN. No, really, it's not news   (nypost.com) divider line 36
    More: Stupid, CNN  
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19186 clicks; posted to Main » on 13 Aug 2012 at 5:07 PM (2 years ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



Voting Results (Smartest)
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest


Archived thread
2012-08-13 03:10:20 PM  
7 votes:
How about they go back to covering news instead of reading from Twitter?
2012-08-13 05:11:25 PM  
5 votes:
Pretty much going to drop the same comment in here that I just left in TFA but hey:

Well, TLC no longer stands for The Learning Channel, A&E used to give us Arts & Entertainment and the History Channel at least would give us old reels of WWII to watch. Now its about Cake Bosses, prostitots, Ice Road Truckers, and human clown cars. So why WOULDN'T Cable News Network abandon the news?
2012-08-13 05:38:11 PM  
4 votes:

jayhawk88: I_Am_Weasel: Here's an idea, CNN. Instead of holographic news reporters have some GOOD news reporters. Reporting actual news. As exciting as 12 hours of Wolf Blitzer is, it's hardly news. I'm not talking about the news that a dog in Topeka can operate a microwave, more along the lines of what the rebels are doing in that there latest of African countries with political strife. Take us back to a time that included Bernard Shaw said things like " "it's a dichotomy!, it's a dichotomy!", and others uttered the phrase "clearly I've never been there, but I feel like we're at the center of hell".

You used to do news, CNN, but now, now...what the hell is it that you do?

See, this is like the old "MTV should play music videos again" argument. No, they shouldn't, because no one cares about getting their news from TV any longer. Those people that do still watch TV for their news don't really want news, they just want Fox News to tell them that everything they believe is right, and all their problems are someone else's fault.


Not true. I don't need my breaking headlines from the television, but having in-depth pieces and analysis is still nice. The news apps mostly give you a tiny selection of highly truncated stories, the websites aren't great on in-depth video and are overwhelmed with Entertainment "news". CNN needs to go back to doing it's damn job and stop with the iReports BS and headlines like "Are you a Compulsive Ice Chewer?"

Honestly the best news coverage in the US is still the BBC.
2012-08-13 03:58:08 PM  
4 votes:
Here's an idea, CNN. Instead of holographic news reporters have some GOOD news reporters. Reporting actual news. As exciting as 12 hours of Wolf Blitzer is, it's hardly news. I'm not talking about the news that a dog in Topeka can operate a microwave, more along the lines of what the rebels are doing in that there latest of African countries with political strife. Take us back to a time that included Bernard Shaw said things like " "it's a dichotomy!, it's a dichotomy!", and others uttered the phrase "clearly I've never been there, but I feel like we're at the center of hell".

You used to do news, CNN, but now, now...what the hell is it that you do?
2012-08-13 07:20:14 PM  
3 votes:

LessO2: At the risk of sounding like a curmudgeon, the heart of CNN went away when people like Bernard Shaw and Judy Woodruff left.

And Wolf Blitzer has the worst diction in the world.

Fareed Zakaria was the best thing on CNN, but now his cred is in doubt.


I was just talking about Bernard Shaw in another thread, recently. THat was a dude who just looked you in the face and gave you some sober, dispassionate facts. You know, news.

Every so often I'll tune in to CNN. Jesus, it's just awful. Not as evil and abrasive as Fox, but equally worthless.
I grew up with CNN and miss it terribly. Of course, as others have pointed out, I used to love the History Channel, Discovery, TLC, et al. Look, we're getting the entertainment we deserve. These execs know that a return to straight news would result in even worse ratings than they currently have. That's on us.

tevis.net

"Everyone ready? 'Cos it's about to rain cold hard facts up in here."
2012-08-13 05:47:06 PM  
3 votes:
I wish they'd take a page from Al-Jazeera International.
2012-08-13 05:29:18 PM  
3 votes:
MTV = reality programming revolving around people you'd not waste a cup of water on if they were on fire
Food Network = contests/reality programming mostly revolving around cake
History Channel = reality programming for hard working Rednecks
Sci-FI Channel aka "Syfy" = no clue anymore
Weather Channel = reality programming pretending to be human interest stories

Why would CNN be about news? Duh.
2012-08-13 03:01:54 PM  
3 votes:
While I'm sure CNN will fark this up, I really wish people wouldn't blanket statement the term "reality show".

What Anthony Bourdain does is different than Jersey Shore or Bad Girls Club.
2012-08-14 12:44:42 AM  
2 votes:
I am in the mood to learn something. Let me turn on The Learning Channel

img2.timeinc.net

Hmmm, maybe some music television...

mtv.mtvnimages.com

Maybe I can learn some history...

www.frugal-cafe.com

uhm...maybe some sports...

www.fouracepoker.com

Eeeesh, what's the weather like?

i.ytimg.com

FARK! What's news?

wonkette.com

I guess when you spend ZERO on production, whatever you make is pure profit.
2012-08-13 05:58:24 PM  
2 votes:
So have fewer channels. You add a new programming niche and all you get is a reduced slice of advertising. Since each channel has a smaller audience, there is less revenue to return into program creation. So everything ends up being a fawning reality show, less because of taste and more because there's no budget.

So consolidate MTV, CNN, The Weather Channel, and the Cartoon Network.

Real Music Videos and Classic Cartoons all day long. None of that reality programming shiat. No commentary or pundits. No shrieking divas. No farking rap shiat. No artless harlots just spreading their buttcheeks to a disco beat. None of that Speed Racer hipster shiat. Scooby Doo sucked cawk in the 70s, still sucks cawk now.

Just Bugs Bunny and Wiley Coyote and Animaniacs and ZZ Top and Pearl Jam. Three minute local weather on the hour. Three minute national news on the half hour.

I'd watch the fook out of that.
2012-08-13 05:55:01 PM  
2 votes:

LessO2: Fareed Zakaria was the best thing on CNN, but now his cred is in doubt.


Yeah, I'm hoping that's the last time he'll ever end up with plagiarism on his hands. A lesser journalist would have seen their career come to a screeching halt on that. He's otherwise good enough to where he can still recover from it, but that was a hack mistake that he's better than to make.
2012-08-13 05:34:36 PM  
2 votes:

KrispyKritter: it makes one wonder if there is some bizarre conspiracy to make certain anyone with a triple digit IQ will stop buying televisions.


Oh for Pete's sake, will people just stop with this 'the REALLY smart people don't watch television and it's going to die and all televisions in the whole world will be out on the curb any day now because of the Internet' claptrap? It's going to stay. It will. TV's a little more durable than vaudeville. There is intelligent viewing out there if you know where you're looking, and besides, even smart people want to take a load off and watch something dumb sometimes. I don't know about you, but I don't know anyone who's watching Masterpiece Theatre marathons. Or Masterpiece Theatre period. I know full well that Wipeout is silly, stupid, people-fall-down-go-boom guilty pleasure material. I watch it anyway.
2012-08-13 05:22:02 PM  
2 votes:
The whole idea of 24 hour news channels is terrible. Right and Left leaning "news" channels are responsible for much of the mental illness in this country.

The sensationalism seems to have effected people in a way that they can no longer tell what is important from what is not. People now watch news for an endorphin rush.
2012-08-13 05:19:21 PM  
2 votes:

I_Am_Weasel: Here's an idea, CNN. Instead of holographic news reporters have some GOOD news reporters. Reporting actual news. As exciting as 12 hours of Wolf Blitzer is, it's hardly news. I'm not talking about the news that a dog in Topeka can operate a microwave, more along the lines of what the rebels are doing in that there latest of African countries with political strife. Take us back to a time that included Bernard Shaw said things like " "it's a dichotomy!, it's a dichotomy!", and others uttered the phrase "clearly I've never been there, but I feel like we're at the center of hell".

You used to do news, CNN, but now, now...what the hell is it that you do?


And they need to stop it with the lame weekend specials like Black in America or their Heroes series. How about actual investigative news like what 60 Minutes does.
2012-08-13 05:09:40 PM  
2 votes:

I_Am_Weasel: Here's an idea, CNN. Instead of holographic news reporters have some GOOD news reporters. Reporting actual news. As exciting as 12 hours of Wolf Blitzer is, it's hardly news. I'm not talking about the news that a dog in Topeka can operate a microwave, more along the lines of what the rebels are doing in that there latest of African countries with political strife. Take us back to a time that included Bernard Shaw said things like " "it's a dichotomy!, it's a dichotomy!", and others uttered the phrase "clearly I've never been there, but I feel like we're at the center of hell".

You used to do news, CNN, but now, now...what the hell is it that you do?


Try and emulate Fox News.
2012-08-13 04:31:31 PM  
2 votes:
There are a lot of websites and TV shows that commonly state they aren't news, and they provide more news than CNN.
2012-08-13 03:50:05 PM  
2 votes:

vpb: The funny thing is that the article is on the NY Post.


Well, they are the "not news" experts.
2012-08-14 01:25:58 AM  
1 votes:
Might as well, CNN already looks like a "reality" based TV show.
farm3.staticflickr.com
2012-08-13 08:16:26 PM  
1 votes:

fozziewazzi: hammettman: coco ebert: I wish they'd take a page from Al-Jazeera International.

Yes, Al-Jazeera does embody the essence of unvarnished, unbiased journalism. They have picked up the torch, dropped by the major broadcast networks in the 80's, carried on by CNN during the Turner reign in the 90's, kept alight by the beeb and PBS during the early naughts... Unfortunately, the BBC and PBS don't offer full time coverage, but, I'm actually sensing, in a tilting at windmills kind of way, a rebirth of actual news outlets. Network news, with its pablum, is being savaged by small outlets and even parody -- TDS and Colbert. I have a feeling that real news will at some point make a comeback. Film at 11...

PBS and the BBC are both publicly funded and have the luxury of reporting hard news at length without obsessing over ratings. Al Jazeera, funded by the state of Qatar, has yet to turn a profit. If there was market demand for a 24x7 hard news channel we'd have one.


Therein lies the rub. News divisions of old were never intended, nor needed to "turn a profit" but were part of networks as a whole, which used to operate in the public interest. Having news divisions which reported factually was part of that contract.
2012-08-13 07:42:25 PM  
1 votes:

hammettman: coco ebert: I wish they'd take a page from Al-Jazeera International.

Yes, Al-Jazeera does embody the essence of unvarnished, unbiased journalism. They have picked up the torch, dropped by the major broadcast networks in the 80's, carried on by CNN during the Turner reign in the 90's, kept alight by the beeb and PBS during the early naughts... Unfortunately, the BBC and PBS don't offer full time coverage, but, I'm actually sensing, in a tilting at windmills kind of way, a rebirth of actual news outlets. Network news, with its pablum, is being savaged by small outlets and even parody -- TDS and Colbert. I have a feeling that real news will at some point make a comeback. Film at 11...


PBS and the BBC are both publicly funded and have the luxury of reporting hard news at length without obsessing over ratings. Al Jazeera, funded by the state of Qatar, has yet to turn a profit. If there was market demand for a 24x7 hard news channel we'd have one.
2012-08-13 07:35:49 PM  
1 votes:
Listen, lad. I built this network up from nothing. When I started , all there was was ABC, CBS and NBC. Others said I was daft to build an all news network on cable, but I built CNN all the same, just to show 'em. It was great. But I needed more. So, I built the CNN Checkout Channel especially for grocery stores. That died in 1993. So, I built a third one, CNNSI. That one died in 2002. But the fourth one, Headline News stayed up! And that's what you're gonna get, lad: a former great idea that today struggles with delusions of relevance..

I want my MTV back.
2012-08-13 06:51:59 PM  
1 votes:
How about doing unbiased in-depth real world issues-based investigative news. Nobody else is.
2012-08-13 06:48:43 PM  
1 votes:
It probably already been said, but lets restore the 'truth in newscasting law' and we can get back to real news on the news stations and delete foxnews at the same time.

/Canadas foxnews north gets around the truth law by having daily 'commentary' from in house d-bags.
//Pre-zombie Reagan removed the truth law.
Ehh
2012-08-13 06:31:02 PM  
1 votes:
hammettman: coco ebert: I wish they'd take a page from Al-Jazeera International.

Yes, Al-Jazeera does embody the essence of unvarnished, unbiased journalism. They have picked up the torch, dropped by the major broadcast networks in the 80's, carried on by CNN during the Turner reign in the 90's, kept alight by the beeb and PBS during the early naughts... Unfortunately, the BBC and PBS don't offer full time coverage, but, I'm actually sensing, in a tilting at windmills kind of way, a rebirth of actual news outlets. Network news, with its pablum, is being savaged by small outlets and even parody -- TDS and Colbert. I have a feeling that real news will at some point make a comeback. Film at 11...


Every time I watch a minute or so of CNN in the morning when the BBC or Al-Jazeera is running a commercial or riding one of its hobby-horses, I just get angry quickly. CNN isn't news. It's propaganda mixed with BS mixed with a high school pep rally.

Next up: What somebody said about somebody else--what's your opinion? We have a collection of idiots to tell you what they think others will say.
2012-08-13 06:22:39 PM  
1 votes:

thomps: I_Am_Weasel: Here's an idea, CNN. Instead of holographic news reporters have some GOOD news reporters. Reporting actual news. As exciting as 12 hours of Wolf Blitzer is, it's hardly news. I'm not talking about the news that a dog in Topeka can operate a microwave, more along the lines of what the rebels are doing in that there latest of African countries with political strife. Take us back to a time that included Bernard Shaw said things like " "it's a dichotomy!, it's a dichotomy!", and others uttered the phrase "clearly I've never been there, but I feel like we're at the center of hell".

You used to do news, CNN, but now, now...what the hell is it that you do?

that sounds sooooo booooooring


I'd be just as glad to go back to the Olden Days when there were only three news stations, nobody had to jostle for ratings and advertising, and we actually got NEWS instead of this "fair & balanced" crap.
2012-08-13 06:13:46 PM  
1 votes:

coco ebert: I wish they'd take a page from Al-Jazeera International.


Yes, Al-Jazeera does embody the essence of unvarnished, unbiased journalism. They have picked up the torch, dropped by the major broadcast networks in the 80's, carried on by CNN during the Turner reign in the 90's, kept alight by the beeb and PBS during the early naughts... Unfortunately, the BBC and PBS don't offer full time coverage, but, I'm actually sensing, in a tilting at windmills kind of way, a rebirth of actual news outlets. Network news, with its pablum, is being savaged by small outlets and even parody -- TDS and Colbert. I have a feeling that real news will at some point make a comeback. Film at 11...
2012-08-13 06:11:04 PM  
1 votes:
By the way, for a package of good journalists, look at this (hotlinked) picture:

www.jackarcher.com

That was Current's Vanguard team circa 2009. All five of these people kick ass. From left, and I've already mentioned two of them:

Kaj Larsen (now with CNN, does CNN Presents)
Mariana van Zeller (now with National Geographic)
Laura Ling (now with E!, does E! Investigates)
Christof Putzel (still with Current)
Adam Yamaguchi (still with Current)
2012-08-13 05:38:10 PM  
1 votes:

Why Would I Read the Article: I try to watch CNN on weekends from time to time, but Fredricka Whitfield, Soledad Obrien and Don Lemon and so spectacuarly stupid and terrible anchors that it is just impossible. I don't need them to go the Fox route and bring only beauty queens, but finding competent anchors would be a start. I can't speak to the competency of their weekday anchors, but I'm assuming they're also terrible.


Anderson Cooper. Also Sanjay Gupta. And the aforementioned Christiane Amanpour. There's also Kaj Larsen, who they recently grabbed off Current in the wake of Olbermann showing up, breaking the news division all to hell and then getting himself fired, leaving a smoking shell where a halfway decent network used to be.

I disagree with you on Soledad O'Brien, but that's your call.
2012-08-13 05:34:35 PM  
1 votes:
I try to watch CNN on weekends from time to time, but Fredricka Whitfield, Soledad Obrien and Don Lemon and so spectacuarly stupid and terrible anchors that it is just impossible. I don't need them to go the Fox route and bring only beauty queens, but finding competent anchors would be a start. I can't speak to the competency of their weekday anchors, but I'm assuming they're also terrible.
2012-08-13 05:34:13 PM  
1 votes:

hdhale: MTV = reality programming revolving around people you'd not waste a cup of water on if they were on fire
Food Network = contests/reality programming mostly revolving around cake
History Channel = reality programming for hard working Rednecks
Sci-FI Channel aka "Syfy" = no clue anymore
Weather Channel = reality programming pretending to be human interest stories

Why would CNN be about news? Duh.


If CNN wiggled in a few porn reality programs, they'd be back in the black in no time.
2012-08-13 05:26:45 PM  
1 votes:
What is with the idiot in the comments who keeps referring to the owner, Ted Turner? He hasn't owned CNN in well over a decade.
2012-08-13 05:21:04 PM  
1 votes:

KatjaMouse: Pretty much going to drop the same comment in here that I just left in TFA but hey:

Well, TLC no longer stands for The Learning Channel, A&E used to give us Arts & Entertainment and the History Channel at least would give us old reels of WWII to watch. Now its about Cake Bosses, prostitots, Ice Road Truckers, and human clown cars. So why WOULDN'T Cable News Network abandon the news?


it's so sad, isn't it? as more people got more channels those channels became not worth watching. CNN is just another fine example of well paid professionals driving a car right off a cliff. it makes one wonder if there is some bizarre conspiracy to make certain anyone with a triple digit IQ will stop buying televisions.
2012-08-13 05:16:21 PM  
1 votes:
And with their "premier" newsperson, Fahreed Zacarias now in deep shiat, their credibility will be tarnished, making it that much harder for them be relevant...

downstairs: While I'm sure CNN will fark this up, I really wish people wouldn't blanket statement the term "reality show".

What Anthony Bourdain does is different than Jersey Shore or Bad Girls Club.


yeah....the Jersey Shore and Bad Girls Club cast aren't nearly as self-important or pretentious as that douchnozzle Bourdain...
2012-08-13 05:16:12 PM  
1 votes:
Don't forget HLN, which I've given up on entirely, and the Weather Channel, which I still have some hope for. At least they are willing to preempt their reality shows at the first sign of real severe weather.
2012-08-13 05:14:08 PM  
1 votes:
I hope they put on Ow, My Balls!
vpb [TotalFark]
2012-08-13 03:31:17 PM  
1 votes:
The funny thing is that the article is on the NY Post.
 
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