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(Courier Mail)   More and more dog owners are spending big bucks on orthodontic braces, cosmetic dental work, root canal fillings, polishes and mouth washes to give their pooches dazzling, no-gap smiles and "kissable breath." Just adopt a kid already   ( divider line
    More: Obvious, root canals, Old Dogs, cosmetic dental  
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2050 clicks; posted to Main » on 12 Aug 2012 at 8:17 AM (5 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»

Voting Results (Funniest)
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest

2012-08-12 06:50:28 AM  
5 votes:
The problem with adopting a kid is that someone else's kid will never, ever love you half as much as a dog. Hell, your own kids won't either. Even if they go out in the world and make a billion dollars and give it all to you because they love you that much, it's still only measuring in low percentiles of a dog's affection.

The plus side of the coin is that kids probably won't jump on your lap feet first then let the biggest fart of their lives out as they lay across your legs, pinning you to the sofa where you have no choice but to endure the percolated stench of the ancient canine gut flora, passed down from that great hero Broken-tooth Longstrider, the Ice Age wolf that could fell Mammoths with his flatulence and thus was able to support a pack large enough that he's the distant grandfather of all domestic canines.

So, y'know dogs will love you more but kids will smell better. It's all a matter of your priorities at that point.
2012-08-12 08:23:56 AM  
3 votes:

Ed Finnerty: And dogs don't care where you put it, they'll lick peanut butter off any part of you.

Try getting your kids to do that.

i.imgur.comView Full Size
2012-08-12 09:00:40 AM  
2 votes:

military armrest: Hate to break it to subby but the bulk of people that treat their dog's like this ...

Their dog's what?

/sieg heil
2012-08-12 08:50:50 AM  
2 votes:
I suppose having nice clean teeth makes for a better poo eating experience.
2012-08-12 08:38:36 AM  
2 votes:

ButterMule: Fark dogs AND kids.

There, now everyone's happy.

i.imgur.comView Full Size
2012-08-13 05:02:58 AM  
1 vote:

dickfreckle: Alexander Mouse: If you want to be worshiped, get a dog, if you want to know your place in the world, get a cat, a very humbling experience.

You enjoy being humbled by an animal that licks its asshole? You're a grown, human being, capable of complex, rational, and abstract thought. You can create. You can use tools to mold the world around you. We even sent a man to the moon.

But being humbled by a cat is awesome? Do you also enjoy your close friends/romantic interests ignoring and/or using you? Aaaaah, now I get it. You're one of those types.

OK, carry on then.

Thank you for the kitty hate. If enough of us rise up against our feline masters America can be strong again.
2012-08-12 04:36:13 PM  
1 vote:

Grave_Girl: hbomb1129: Yeah but you can't put kids in a crate.

Sure you can:
[ image 400x400]
[ image 400x400]

I think those are just to keep the bugs in.
2012-08-12 10:00:04 AM  
1 vote:
hilltopanimalhospital.netView Full Size
2012-08-12 09:52:50 AM  
1 vote:

dickfreckle: Seems like an appropriate thread to post the only pic on the internet that actually makes me homicidal. You're all lucky; am working from home today.


The entire Internet out there and the one pic that makes you "homicidal" is an image of a lady with a pug in a stroller?

Alrighty then.
2012-08-12 09:38:11 AM  
1 vote:

hbomb1129: Yeah but you can't put kids in a crate.

You've just got to fold them right and they fit in real good.
2012-08-12 08:36:02 AM  
1 vote:
My dog sits when I tell it, can your child do that?

What kids look like...
foodgal.comView Full Size
2012-08-12 08:35:14 AM  
1 vote:
Fark dogs AND kids.

There, now everyone's happy.
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