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(News 10 ABC Sacramento)   Today's ready for Fark headline: "Man arrested for beating opossum can sue police"   (news10.net) divider line 51
    More: Weird, Fark, Anaheim Police Department, United States courts of appeals  
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3126 clicks; posted to Main » on 11 Aug 2012 at 2:05 PM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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ZAZ [TotalFark]
2012-08-11 12:08:39 PM
Lorenzo Oliver called Anaheim police about the opossum attacking his bulldogs in his yard in 2008.

Also warrants the [WEIRD] tag.
 
2012-08-11 12:30:42 PM
How long till I can't kill animals at all?

*readies compound bow*
*sharpens skinning knife*
 
2012-08-11 01:04:20 PM
Beating the Opossum (or Possum for the rest of us) sounds like a great euphemistic term. Sorry, I was too busy beating the possum to answer the phone.
 
2012-08-11 02:10:01 PM
Anaheim PD screws up again... so what else is new?
 
2012-08-11 02:11:12 PM
The Asylum Presents: Mega Opossum Terror!
 
2012-08-11 02:15:45 PM

hlehmann: Anaheim PD screws up again... so what else is new?


shiat, now all of the opossums and raccoons are going to riot.
 
2012-08-11 02:16:51 PM

simplicimus: Beating the Opossum (or Possum for the rest of us) sounds like a great euphemistic term. Sorry, I was too busy beating the possum to answer the phone.


I'll be in my bunk.
 
2012-08-11 02:17:20 PM
If you do happen to kill an opossum, you nedd to know about proper opossum disposal
 
2012-08-11 02:17:59 PM
RIOT!!!
 
2012-08-11 02:19:14 PM
Good for him. Sue those jack booted thugs into the poorhouse.

//had to dispatch a fluffy, adorable little bunny this year after it got into my cool, delicious lettuce. It jumped like 8 feet high, then darted on the ground for a few feet before keeling over - all with its head blown off.
 
2012-08-11 02:20:59 PM
oh my opossum
why i eyes ya


i1.ytimg.com
 
2012-08-11 02:23:32 PM
wdfw.wa.gov

Never seen a possum "attack" anything. If cornered, they fall over and play dead. It's a sort of paralytic seizure- the entire body becomes stiff as a board, falls over in an unnatural posture, the anal glands dump a stinky musk, and the tongue hangs out. They won't react to ANYTHING. My dog picked one up in his mouth and dragged it around. You can poke it with a stick and flip it over. But the funny thing is, they eyes still look at you.

Before that, they'll open their mouth and hiss, but it's all for show. They don't even have a bite reflex. I toyed with one with a stick that was hissing. It didn't try to bite the stick, and after a bit slowly looked around with its mouth open showing it was just kinda stuck that way and he didn't know what to do next.

Possums aren't exactly important wildlife- they have an average lifespan of only 1-1/2 years in the wild, freakishly short. They reproduce fast though. They don't stay in one den more than a few days, they won't be your problem for long.
 
2012-08-11 02:23:42 PM
i suppose it's only illegal if you're farking them.

/near a school?
 
2012-08-11 02:26:43 PM
Needs this:
img861.imageshack.us
 
2012-08-11 02:27:38 PM
cdn.epicski.com
 
2012-08-11 02:29:50 PM

Oznog: [wdfw.wa.gov image 536x395]

Never seen a possum "attack" anything. If cornered, they fall over and play dead. It's a sort of paralytic seizure- the entire body becomes stiff as a board, falls over in an unnatural posture, the anal glands dump a stinky musk, and the tongue hangs out. They won't react to ANYTHING. My dog picked one up in his mouth and dragged it around. You can poke it with a stick and flip it over. But the funny thing is, they eyes still look at you.

Before that, they'll open their mouth and hiss, but it's all for show. They don't even have a bite reflex. I toyed with one with a stick that was hissing. It didn't try to bite the stick, and after a bit slowly looked around with its mouth open showing it was just kinda stuck that way and he didn't know what to do next.

Possums aren't exactly important wildlife- they have an average lifespan of only 1-1/2 years in the wild, freakishly short. They reproduce fast though. They don't stay in one den more than a few days, they won't be your problem for long.


Some are different from others. Some only hiss and then pass out, some will start an attack before they pass out.

simplicimus: Beating the Opossum (or Possum for the rest of us) sounds like a great euphemistic term. Sorry, I was too busy beating the possum to answer the phone.


I was trying to beat the possum, but he was playing dead.
 
2012-08-11 02:30:08 PM
It's pretty sad when the enforcers don't even know the very laws they are entrusted to enforce.
 
2012-08-11 02:31:12 PM
You forgot "France Surrenders," subby.

Just for old times.
 
2012-08-11 02:33:30 PM
Possum. Big, freaky, lookin' biatch. Since when did they change it to opossum? When I was comin' up it was just possum. Opossum makes it sound like he's irish or something. Why do they gotta go changing everything?
 
2012-08-11 02:37:23 PM

hlehmann: Anaheim PD screws up again... so what else is new?


Well, this time they may have to answer for their actions. Maybe. That's kinda new.
 
2012-08-11 02:39:12 PM
2.bp.blogspot.com

Coming back to haunt you.
 
2012-08-11 02:42:40 PM
I was riding down the road one day
Someone hit a possum

Whoa, possum, possum, possum, POSSUM!
 
2012-08-11 02:43:16 PM

ThatVANguy: Possum. Big, freaky, lookin' biatch. Since when did they change it to opossum? When I was comin' up it was just possum. Opossum makes it sound like he's irish or something. Why do they gotta go changing everything?


It has always been opossum but when they started flooding the US in the 1840s during the potato famine they had a hard time finding work so some of them dropped the "o" for a more German sounding name so they could find work.
 
2012-08-11 02:43:23 PM
You can be arrested and have a bond set by a judge even when no charges exist. Ain't US style fascism just grand.
 
2012-08-11 02:50:21 PM

Oznog: [2.bp.blogspot.com image 450x303]

Coming back to haunt you.


OK, I have to know. What movie is that from?
 
2012-08-11 02:50:41 PM

hlehmann: Anaheim PD screws up again... so what else is new?


I think the cops are in the moral right here. Whatever the law says, I'm glad this jerkstore was inconvenienced for trying to beat an animal to death with a shovel.
 
2012-08-11 02:52:44 PM

bigstoopidbruce: Oznog: [2.bp.blogspot.com image 450x303]

Coming back to haunt you.

OK, I have to know. What movie is that from?


Citizen Kane.
 
2012-08-11 03:00:01 PM

Oznog: [wdfw.wa.gov image 536x395]

Never seen a possum "attack" anything. If cornered, they fall over and play dead. It's a sort of paralytic seizure- the entire body becomes stiff as a board, falls over in an unnatural posture, the anal glands dump a stinky musk, and the tongue hangs out. They won't react to ANYTHING. My dog picked one up in his mouth and dragged it around. You can poke it with a stick and flip it over. But the funny thing is, they eyes still look at you.

Before that, they'll open their mouth and hiss, but it's all for show. They don't even have a bite reflex. I toyed with one with a stick that was hissing. It didn't try to bite the stick, and after a bit slowly looked around with its mouth open showing it was just kinda stuck that way and he didn't know what to do next.

Possums aren't exactly important wildlife- they have an average lifespan of only 1-1/2 years in the wild, freakishly short. They reproduce fast though. They don't stay in one den more than a few days, they won't be your problem for long.


I fed one a pork chop a few months ago. Pretty docile.

img692.imageshack.us
 
2012-08-11 03:03:49 PM

bigstoopidbruce: Oznog: [2.bp.blogspot.com image 450x303]

Coming back to haunt you.

OK, I have to know. What movie is that from?

Beetlejuice

 
2012-08-11 03:03:55 PM

titwrench: bigstoopidbruce: Oznog: [2.bp.blogspot.com image 450x303]

Coming back to haunt you.

OK, I have to know. What movie is that from?

Citizen Kane.


Bugdrink.
 
2012-08-11 03:06:45 PM

crazytrain: Good for him. Sue those jack booted thugs into the poorhouse.

//had to dispatch a fluffy, adorable little bunny this year after it got into my cool, delicious lettuce. It jumped like 8 feet high, then darted on the ground for a few feet before keeling over - all with its head blown off.


one more name on my "hope you get ass cancer" list
 
2012-08-11 03:08:52 PM
Isn't animal cruelty illegal? I mean, I'm pretty sure beating anything to death with a shovel can be considered cruelty. I mean you can kill pests but I thought it had to be done, you know, humanely unless you're a psychopath or a hillbilly or a hillbilly psychopath.
 
2012-08-11 03:09:45 PM

KrispyKritter: crazytrain: Good for him. Sue those jack booted thugs into the poorhouse.

//had to dispatch a fluffy, adorable little bunny this year after it got into my cool, delicious lettuce. It jumped like 8 feet high, then darted on the ground for a few feet before keeling over - all with its head blown off.

one more name on my "hope you get ass cancer" list


Now give him the benefit of the doubt. Perhaps he lobbethed thine Holy Hand grenade of Antioch. If he is religious he had no choice it is right there in the book of Armaments .
 
2012-08-11 03:25:25 PM

titwrench: KrispyKritter: crazytrain: Good for him. Sue those jack booted thugs into the poorhouse.

//had to dispatch a fluffy, adorable little bunny this year after it got into my cool, delicious lettuce. It jumped like 8 feet high, then darted on the ground for a few feet before keeling over - all with its head blown off.

one more name on my "hope you get ass cancer" list

Now give him the benefit of the doubt. Perhaps he lobbethed thine Holy Hand grenade of Antioch. If he is religious he had no choice it is right there in the book of Armaments .


And the bunny, being naughty in his sight, did snuff it.
 
2012-08-11 03:26:28 PM
 
2012-08-11 03:29:03 PM

Apos: The Asylum Presents: Mega Opossum Terror!


I would not have gotten that joke two days ago.
 
2012-08-11 03:31:17 PM
The man deserves a medal. I've got a few of 'em invading my back yard garden that he can come over and beat anytime he likes.
 
2012-08-11 03:32:08 PM

t-spoon: hlehmann: Anaheim PD screws up again... so what else is new?

I think the cops are in the moral right here. Whatever the law says, I'm glad this jerkstore was inconvenienced for trying to beat an animal to death with a shovel.


img209.imageshack.us
 
2012-08-11 03:40:44 PM
If he wasn't charged, why did he have to raise $20k to bond out of jail?
 
2012-08-11 03:40:52 PM
Look, I am a Vegan and against killing animals and such...but being ARRESTED for it?! What the fark?!

If you wanna "punish" the guy, making spend a weekend at a petting zoo cleaning up animal shiat or cleaning after the dogs/kittehs at an Animal Shelter.
 
2012-08-11 04:03:24 PM
The opossum was attacking his bulldogs. Yeah, I totally believe that! I really really do.
 
2012-08-11 04:31:39 PM
Before he crossed he looked both ways,
Then on the centerline he fixed his gaze,
He was a possum happy and fat,
Before my semi made him flat.
 
2012-08-11 04:35:40 PM
www.motifake.com

Man arrested for beating opossum can sue police

What's the problem?

/and the verb in that sentence isn't conjugated correctly
 
2012-08-11 04:55:02 PM

TheWhoppah: If you do happen to kill an opossum, you nedd to know about proper opossum disposal


From what I hear you don't want to try burning them in your pot belly stove. They contain a lot of fat and may burn your house down.

GEICO -A Pet Possum : Easier Way to Save
 
2012-08-11 05:11:14 PM

StokeyBob: TheWhoppah: If you do happen to kill an opossum, you nedd to know about proper opossum disposal

From what I hear you don't want to try burning them in your pot belly stove. They contain a lot of fat and may burn your house down.

GEICO -A Pet Possum : Easier Way to Save


here's a little known fact sl
if you scramble the words (anagram) of disposal you can get "adipos ls" the ls for lisa simpson cause i'm so fscking smart
 
2012-08-11 06:31:28 PM
Opossums were attacking his bulldogs? Er, I think not. I think it was the other way around. Just like the woman who called the clinic where I work, sure that a groundhog attacked her 110 pound dog. Sure.

So, you can kill animals with any method you want? What about slow strangulation? The rack? Sorry, I think outside of respectful hunting, any animal killing is questionable. Beating an opossum with a shovel?!

Opossums are fairly docile. All the have is a growl, mostly, then they pass out. But yes, if you attack them, they'll bite back.

/Wildlife Rehabilitator; has handled hundreds of sick/injured opossums
 
2012-08-11 06:50:58 PM
Oznog
Possums aren't exactly important wildlife- they have an average lifespan of only 1-1/2 years in the wild, freakishly short. They reproduce fast though. They don't stay in one den more than a few days, they won't be your problem for long.

I agree with everything in your post, and thank you for it, except for parts of the above. Who among us humans can say what is 'important' wildlife? Possums are one of the oldest mammals on earth - been around millions of years, even though their lifespan is short. That must count for something.
 
2012-08-11 09:48:44 PM

t-spoon: hlehmann: Anaheim PD screws up again... so what else is new?

I think the cops are in the moral right here. Whatever the law says, I'm glad this jerkstore was inconvenienced for trying to beat an animal to death with a shovel.




I bet firing a gun within city limits is illegal, leaving few options.
 
2012-08-11 09:51:11 PM

mafiageek1980: Look, I am a Vegan and against killing animals and such...but being ARRESTED for it?! What the fark?!

If you wanna "punish" the guy, making spend a weekend at a petting zoo cleaning up animal shiat or cleaning after the dogs/kittehs at an Animal Shelter.


you don't get to punish people for actions that are legal.
 
2012-08-11 11:09:18 PM
This is a step in the right direction.

But while possum-beaters may walk free, the rest of us chicken-chokers and monkey-spankers still get accused of "public lewdness" or whatever.
 
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