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(New Jersey 101.5)   Casinos create "portable gaming devices" so customers can bleed money in bathrooms, restaurants, by the pool and everywhere else they can't fit a slot machine   (nj1015.com) divider line 24
    More: Interesting, Posner, Atlantic City, Harrah  
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1105 clicks; posted to Geek » on 09 Aug 2012 at 1:15 PM (2 years ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2012-08-09 01:19:07 PM
Why bother with the casino at all then?
 
2012-08-09 01:30:39 PM
I give them enough time until someone cheats at virtual blackjack or poker until they disappear.

On the casino floor they can monitor you for cheating... in your hotel room or the restroom they can't.
 
2012-08-09 01:37:03 PM

theresnothinglft: I give them enough time until someone cheats at virtual blackjack or poker until they disappear.

On the casino floor they can monitor you for cheating... in your hotel room or the restroom they can't.


yet
 
2012-08-09 01:47:06 PM

naz-drala: theresnothinglft: I give them enough time until someone cheats at virtual blackjack or poker until they disappear.

On the casino floor they can monitor you for cheating... in your hotel room or the restroom they can't.

yet


oo yeah that won't cause a PR controversy


"We had to put cameras in the hotel rooms and restrooms to keep guests from cheating on their handheld casino games. They are in no means meant to be used for other purposes." All while security camera operators watch the guy making out with a prostitute on monitor 69.
 
2012-08-09 02:11:06 PM
I don't really "get" casinos. Slot machines are not only boring, they chew your money at an extreme rate. You can easily blow through a few hundred bucks in an hour. And card games aren't really that much better.

On a unit basis, casinos are a horrible value for entertainment.

Plus they're all dark, smoky and full of horrible old people with depressing addictions.
 
2012-08-09 02:11:37 PM

theresnothinglft: "We had to put cameras in the hotel rooms and restrooms to keep guests from cheating on their handheld casino games. They are in no means meant to be used for other purposes." All while security camera operators watch the guy making out with a prostitute on monitor 69.


For $99.99 get a professionally produced video of the highlight of your vacation.

For $199.99 get a professionally produced video of attractive, well lit actors that you can say was the highlight of your vacation.
 
2012-08-09 02:58:32 PM

theresnothinglft: I give them enough time until someone cheats at virtual blackjack or poker until they disappear.

On the casino floor they can monitor you for cheating... in your hotel room or the restroom they can't.


I am thoroughly convinced some cruise ship casinos do cheat, at least with black jack. There is no oversight agency out there in international waters, so why not? Some anecdotal evidence - a Carnival Cruise I went on recently used Shufflemasters that continuously shuffeld (no shoes). Combine with the fact those things have optical reader technology that informs which cards are where, could easily rig it to cheat if you knew how many players there were in addition to the dealer. Usually players win every now and then, but not on that trip. We were all mercilessly beaten down for the duration of the cruise. A statistical improbability.. I remember one 15 minute stretch where the dealer had 7 blackjacks to my 0. The odds of that ratio happening are less than 1 in 100 and that they happened in such quick succession was equally as improbable. I remember one night they had a table without a shufflemaster, but I guess they weren't making enough with it and went back to Shufflemasters at all the tables.

Not saying don't gamble on cruise ships, have fun, but I wouldn't advise betting more than the table minimum.
 
2012-08-09 03:03:23 PM
A portable gaming device that makes me bleed money... They already have those. They're called hookers.
 
2012-08-09 03:05:56 PM
Zynga mobile apps point and laugh.
 
2012-08-09 03:30:05 PM
The trick for any Casino is for your buddy to bet $5.00 on Red while you bet $5.00 on black 99% of the time one of you will win, and since you are playing you can order free drinks. at the end of the night you tip the $5.00 to the dealer and walk away with $80.00 worth of booze in your liver.


They play their game, I play mine.
 
2012-08-09 03:45:59 PM

Pumpernickel bread: theresnothinglft: I give them enough time until someone cheats at virtual blackjack or poker until they disappear.

On the casino floor they can monitor you for cheating... in your hotel room or the restroom they can't.

I am thoroughly convinced some cruise ship casinos do cheat, at least with black jack. There is no oversight agency out there in international waters, so why not? Some anecdotal evidence - a Carnival Cruise I went on recently used Shufflemasters that continuously shuffeld (no shoes). Combine with the fact those things have optical reader technology that informs which cards are where, could easily rig it to cheat if you knew how many players there were in addition to the dealer. Usually players win every now and then, but not on that trip. We were all mercilessly beaten down for the duration of the cruise. A statistical improbability.. I remember one 15 minute stretch where the dealer had 7 blackjacks to my 0. The odds of that ratio happening are less than 1 in 100 and that they happened in such quick succession was equally as improbable. I remember one night they had a table without a shufflemaster, but I guess they weren't making enough with it and went back to Shufflemasters at all the tables.

Not saying don't gamble on cruise ships, have fun, but I wouldn't advise betting more than the table minimum.


i.ytimg.com

Bet I know where that boat was heading...
 
2012-08-09 03:53:58 PM

Kanemano: The trick for any Casino is for your buddy to bet $5.00 on Red while you bet $5.00 on black 99% of the time one of you will win, and since you are playing you can order free drinks. at the end of the night you tip the $5.00 to the dealer and walk away with $80.00 worth of booze in your liver.


They play their game, I play mine.


I like this idea.
 
2012-08-09 04:08:16 PM
I just want craps, hookers, and blow. Is that too much to ask for?
 
2012-08-09 04:09:05 PM

Kanemano: The trick for any Casino is for your buddy to bet $5.00 on Red while you bet $5.00 on black 99% of the time one of you will win, and since you are playing you can order free drinks. at the end of the night you tip the $5.00 to the dealer and walk away with $80.00 worth of booze in your liver.


They play their game, I play mine.


I've used that same strategy as well. Sometimes, I'll bet $5 on Black and $6 on Red, or vice versa, just to switch it up. I'm either ahead a dollar or only lost a dollar...and keep those drinks coming.
 
2012-08-09 04:23:27 PM

Kanemano: The trick for any Casino is for your buddy to bet $5.00 on Red while you bet $5.00 on black 99% of the time one of you will win, and since you are playing you can order free drinks. at the end of the night you tip the $5.00 to the dealer and walk away with $80.00 worth of booze in your liver.


They play their game, I play mine.


Uh, there are 36 red/black numbers and 2 greens. 1 out of every 19 spins you're likely to lose your money, not 1 out of 100. I hope you can drink fast enough to make it worth losing $10 every 15 minutes or so.
 
2012-08-09 05:20:53 PM

Farker Soze: Uh, there are 36 red/black numbers and 2 greens. 1 out of every 19 spins you're likely to lose your money, not 1 out of 100. I hope you can drink fast enough to make it worth losing $10 every 15 minutes or so.


Unless it's a European layout with only one zero, which case one of you will win 36/37 times. With well over a minute between rolls - sometimes even three four minutes on heavily played tables, or on rounds with a number of winners - you're very rarely going to lose more than $10/hour - on average, of course.. If you each get in three drinks in an hour, and tip $1 each, you're getting six drinks for $16. Decent price.
 
2012-08-09 05:39:26 PM

kronicfeld: Farker Soze: Uh, there are 36 red/black numbers and 2 greens. 1 out of every 19 spins you're likely to lose your money, not 1 out of 100. I hope you can drink fast enough to make it worth losing $10 every 15 minutes or so.

Unless it's a European layout with only one zero, which case one of you will win 36/37 times. With well over a minute between rolls - sometimes even three four minutes on heavily played tables, or on rounds with a number of winners - you're very rarely going to lose more than $10/hour - on average, of course.. If you each get in three drinks in an hour, and tip $1 each, you're getting six drinks for $16. Decent price.


Where you find a Euro table where you can get drinks at a frequency of anything better than one an hour, unless you're tipping real good?

Meh, I can get a nice 6 pack for $7, or $20 for a fifth of Jack and about $1.50 per shot, and I don't have to watch a bunch of elderly dead eyed degenerates pawn their soul one green chip at a time.

Better yet, I'll hit the poker tables. There I can still watch a bunch of dead eyed degenerates mortgage their soul one pot at a time, but it's all good because I'll play tight and usually at least break even before the free drinks, so screw those losers.
 
2012-08-09 07:55:39 PM

Vegan Meat Popsicle: I don't really "get" casinos. Slot machines are not only boring, they chew your money at an extreme rate. You can easily blow through a few hundred bucks in an hour. And card games aren't really that much better.

On a unit basis, casinos are a horrible value for entertainment.

Plus they're all dark, smoky and full of horrible old people with depressing addictions.


I have a friend whose stepmother looks down her nose at him playing videogames of any sort, yet will spend hours in front of her laptop playing virtual blackjack. I understand the appeal when it is for money but you can't seriously tell me that your card game is more mentally stimulating than say, the Elder Scrolls or Minecraft or Battlefield or Mass Effect or what have you.

My dad I think, has it right. When he goes to Vegas part of his entertainment budget is for the tables, and he doesn't treat it any differently than money spent on shows or dinner or something. Often he breaks even or comes out ahead, but if he goes through it all, he stops.
 
2012-08-09 09:16:59 PM

Kanemano: The trick for any Casino is for your buddy to bet $5.00 on Red while you bet $5.00 on black 99% of the time one of you will win, and since you are playing you can order free drinks. at the end of the night you tip the $5.00 to the dealer and walk away with $80.00 worth of booze in your liver.


They play their game, I play mine.


Don't forget the $5 each to the waitress when you first sit down so she brings you drinks when she takes orders as well as when she fills orders. You drink twice as fast for the price of one drink at the bar. Worked for me and a buddy at MGM Grand.

These days I play Pai Gow Poker. Statistically, you can push roughly 28% of the time (you do pay 5% on a win though), and a full table can take 2 minutes per hand.
 
2012-08-09 09:19:34 PM

Pumpernickel bread: Shufflemasters that continuously shuffeld (no shoes).


My buddy claims the same thing you do, and states that [Citation needed] the patent on a Shufflemaster is in the Caribbean where they aren't public record so you can't prove it's actually random. I bet the ones in Vegas are though, the NGC takes that seriously.
 
2012-08-09 10:29:44 PM

Vegan Meat Popsicle: I don't really "get" casinos. Slot machines are not only boring, they chew your money at an extreme rate. You can easily blow through a few hundred bucks in an hour. And card games aren't really that much better.

On a unit basis, casinos are a horrible value for entertainment.

Plus they're all dark, smoky and full of horrible old people with depressing addictions.


Find penny slots, wait for cocktail girls, receive drink, move to different penny slot so you're in line for cocktail girl rotation again. It works pretty well.

I spent a whopping $12 last night and got 5 drinks. Not bad, I don't think

Also, all slot machines should be required to have a lever. Pressing buttons is boring, but a lever? Hours of fun.
 
2012-08-09 10:58:35 PM
When I went to Vegas for the first time, I noticed there were slot machines around me from the moment I got off the plane until I got into a taxi. I asked the taxi driver why there wasn't a slot machine in his car, and he replied with "Don't give them any ideas."
 
2012-08-09 11:56:48 PM
as I left vegas this morning the stewardess asked how I did. I said I broke even .she said" honey we call that winning" /now home in the boring atl and still drunk
 
2012-08-10 09:12:31 AM

Pumpernickel bread: Usually players win every now and then, but not on that trip. We were all mercilessly beaten down for the duration of the cruise. A statistical improbability.. I remember one 15 minute stretch where the dealer had 7 blackjacks to my 0. The odds of that ratio happening are less than 1 in 100 and that they happened in such quick succession was equally as improbable.


LOL. Anyone else wise up, or did you all keep coming back to the barn to get fleeced?

I hate casinos. When I worked in advertising for a year I had to go to Foxwoods a few times and it was just depressing.
 
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