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(Herald Tribune (SW Florida))   Yes sir, Officer Obie, I cannot tell a lie. I put that envelope under that garbage   (heraldtribune.com) divider line 70
    More: Florida, refuses, vacant lots  
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7975 clicks; posted to Main » on 09 Aug 2012 at 12:28 PM (2 years ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2012-08-09 09:17:05 AM  
with full orchestration and five part harmony and stuff like that...
 
2012-08-09 09:23:52 AM  
I wanna kill.
 
2012-08-09 09:24:55 AM  
Father rapers.
 
2012-08-09 09:39:48 AM  
I knew it wasn't a ordinary pickle.

/Wait, what?
 
2012-08-09 09:58:00 AM  

the_rev: I wanna kill.


I agree. Death penalty for illegal dumping.
 
2012-08-09 09:58:33 AM  
Great now that's gonna be stuck in my head all day

/song has lost some of it's luster after I found out Arlo was a Dubya fan
 
Pud
2012-08-09 10:07:15 AM  
He said, "What were you arrested for, kid?"
And I said, "Littering." And they all moved away from me on the bench
there
 
2012-08-09 10:11:47 AM  
Deputies arrested Lopez on a felony littering charge on Tuesday.


...and creating a nuisance
 
2012-08-09 10:22:52 AM  
He can only hope for a blind judge who won't look at the twenty seven eight-by-ten colour glossy photographs with circles and arrows and a paragraph on the back of each one explaining what each one was to be used as evidence against him.
 
2012-08-09 10:24:58 AM  
I'm sure it won't be hard to find shovels and rakes and implements of destruction to clean it up.
 
2012-08-09 10:35:27 AM  
Put him in on the Group W bench.
 
2012-08-09 10:44:36 AM  
320 cubic feet of garbage is like the length of a 100 meter/yard Olympic pool, but square and then as tall as a 20 story building. Or something like that.
 
2012-08-09 11:08:05 AM  
And 27 hi-definition color digital photos with circles and arrows photoshopped in...
 
2012-08-09 11:29:53 AM  
Now I'm in the mood for a Thanksgiving dinner that can't be beat
 
2012-08-09 12:31:41 PM  
The dump was closed? It's not even Thanksgiving.
 
2012-08-09 12:32:27 PM  
If the judge doesn't ask, "Kid, have you rehabilitated yourself," then he's missing a great opportunity.

/We had never heard of a dump being closed on Thanksgiving before, so with tears in our eyes, we loaded up the shovels and rakes and implements of destruction and looked for somewhere else to put the garbage.
 
2012-08-09 12:32:46 PM  
I is now hungry for yams, cranberries and such
 
2012-08-09 12:34:15 PM  

the_rev: I wanna kill.


I wanna see blood... and guts... in my teeth.
 
2012-08-09 12:34:30 PM  
Many years ago, I worked in charge of networking for a large university system. The phone call came in one day from a Berkeley Heights officer.
It seems a wire spool with my name on it had been found in a pile of garbage in their town and they wanted to know about it.

It was all I could do to avoid confessing to Officer Obie that I'd driven over to his town to stick that wire spool under that pile of garbage.
Turned out one of my contractors (who had his office in that town) had been told by his landlord it was OK to pile stuff behind the building but it turned out it was someone else's property.

All in all, it turned out OK. I didn't get arrested but my contractor did have to pick up the garbage.
 
2012-08-09 12:34:37 PM  
Kid, have you rehabilitated yourself?
 
2012-08-09 12:36:04 PM  
He looks like a father raper and a mother stabber to me.
 
2012-08-09 12:36:22 PM  

jack21221: the_rev: I wanna kill.

I wanna see blood... and guts... in my teeth.


With feeeling.
 
2012-08-09 12:37:18 PM  
Quotated
 
2012-08-09 12:39:23 PM  

Kevin72: 320 cubic feet of garbage is like the length of a 100 meter/yard Olympic pool, but square and then as tall as a 20 story building. Or something like that.


Well, the cube root of 320 is about 6.8 so about a 7 foot cube.

/\/\/\/ Estimation skills, how do they work?
 
2012-08-09 12:39:24 PM  
What's the big deal. Florida is full of trash.
 
2012-08-09 12:39:43 PM  
I live in a city named Fredericton, so i'm getting a kick....
 
2012-08-09 12:40:26 PM  
Don't worry. Alice will bail him out. Remember Alice? This thread's about her
 
2012-08-09 12:41:31 PM  
I mean... I mean... I mean I'm sitting here on the bench.
 
2012-08-09 12:42:00 PM  
aww, you farking bastards have no idea what you've done. I really like the song but for me its like Carried Away for Cartman. Once you start it, I have to finish it! I was letting it run through my head as I went through the comments but after every quoted line I had to pick up where it left off. You're killin' me.

/leaving to go sideways off a mountain
 
2012-08-09 12:44:19 PM  
Obie? I wonder if he means Old Ben...
 
2012-08-09 12:46:05 PM  

NuttierThanEver: Great now that's gonna be stuck in my head all day

/song has lost some of it's luster after I found out Arlo was a Dubya fan


Why would you say that. Some things people just don't need to know.
I bet you go around sharing the Daddy ate my eyes.

/I had more examples but none were safe for work, and I'm not in the mood to share those mind bombs.
 
2012-08-09 12:46:45 PM  

rnatalie: All in all, it turned out OK. I didn't get arrested but my contractor did have to pick up the garbage.


Did you have to pay $50?
 
2012-08-09 12:47:14 PM  
Happy Thanksgiving you Jive Turkeys
 
2012-08-09 12:48:20 PM  

jim32rr: I is now hungry for yams, cranberries and such


I had a lean cuisine, wih Turkey, green beans, cranberry and had some french fried onions at my desk. Mini-Thanksgiving Dinner.

/So I'm getting a kick...
 
2012-08-09 12:49:21 PM  

NuttierThanEver: Great now that's gonna be stuck in my head all day

/song has lost some of it's luster after I found out Arlo was a Dubya fan


Group dubya fan, you mean.
 
DAR [TotalFark]
2012-08-09 12:53:24 PM  
"Obie, did you think I was going to hang myself for littering?"
 
2012-08-09 12:53:29 PM  
Our dirt road that leads past our house is a popular place for people (asshats) to dump their trash on the side of the road. I'm always elated when I ride my four-wheeler down there and an officer is picking through a pile of trash to find any mail or paperwork that will tie it to an individual so they can by fined heavily (and hopefully made to clean up their own mess).

/glad the cops care enough to check

//otherwise cops please stay away from my place! Especially the secret garden in the woods!
 
2012-08-09 12:55:05 PM  
Could you imagine everyone on Fark walking in singing a verse of Alice's restaurant and walking out? They may think it's a movement.
 
2012-08-09 12:56:00 PM  
A felony? Littering is bad, dumping is really bad, but a felony? A mark that will stay on your record forever, affecting your ability to find employment, housing, and government assistance, should you require it? A felony?

/practice?
 
2012-08-09 12:56:08 PM  
I think we should all go down to the recruiting station, and sing a few bars....
 
2012-08-09 12:57:23 PM  
Felony littering?

Wow.
 
2012-08-09 01:04:53 PM  
I'm going to guess that Mr Lopez is not familiar with the tune about Alice's Restaurant... nor any other works by Mr Guthrie.
 
2012-08-09 01:10:01 PM  
Wait for it to come around on the guitar
 
2012-08-09 01:15:11 PM  

FibSeq: aww, you farking bastards have no idea what you've done. I really like the song but for me its like Carried Away for Cartman. Once you start it, I have to finish it! I was letting it run through my head as I went through the comments but after every quoted line I had to pick up where it left off. You're killin' me.

/leaving to go sideways off a mountain


You seem like a flying singing writing weirdo-freak.

/which is illegal.
 
2012-08-09 01:19:33 PM  

SonOfSpam: NuttierThanEver: Great now that's gonna be stuck in my head all day

/song has lost some of it's luster after I found out Arlo was a Dubya fan

Group dubya fan, you mean.


From 2009:
Arlo Guthrie: "I became a registered Republican about five or six years ago because to have a successful democracy you have to have at least two parties, and one of them was failing miserably. We had enough good Democrats. We needed a few more good Republicans. We needed a loyal opposition."
 
2012-08-09 01:25:14 PM  
Well you got your summary littering, where you drop your cig butt out the window because you're too stupid to figure out how to use an ash tray, then there's your misdemeanor littering where you toss your couch off the back of your pickup onto the shoulder of a backroad because you're too stupid to figure out how to arrange for bulk item pickup, then there's your felony littering, where you dump a truckload of construction material junk onto a vacant lot because you're too stupid to realize you left your invoice in there and someone might care enough to find it.

That's how I imagine it might be considered a felony.
 
2012-08-09 01:36:22 PM  

Sofa King Smart: I'm going to guess that Mr Lopez is not familiar with the tune about Alice's Restaurant... nor any other works by Mr Guthrie.


How about his dad's song, Deportee?
 
2012-08-09 01:39:21 PM  
Ever tried playing that cute little riff? It's devilish tricky. Once you get it down, muscle memory takes over, but learning it for the first time makes you think that Arlo's fingers were being independently operated by a set of twelve schizophrenic personalities, each one responsible for a single note played at a single point in the sequence. Fun at parties, though.
 
2012-08-09 01:40:17 PM  
Officer: Do you know why I pulled you over?
Lopez: Littering?
Officer: Littering and ???
Lopez: Littering and ...
Officer: Littering and ???????
Lopez: Littering and ..........
Officer: Littering and smoking the Palm Fronds.
 
2012-08-09 01:42:27 PM  
Felony littering?
 
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