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(Travel and Leisure)   Alaskan Airlines: Our techs are so good, they write notes on minor tears on the wing   ( divider line
    More: Scary, Alaska Airlines, technicians, major airline  
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11001 clicks; posted to Main » on 08 Aug 2012 at 10:23 PM (5 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»

Voting Results (Funniest)
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest

2012-08-09 01:05:52 AM  
3 votes:
Note should have read:

"You should see the OTHER wing!"
2012-08-08 10:43:00 PM  
3 votes:
Don't worry, it's Alaska Airlines so their technicians did 20 minutes of prayer before takeoff.
2012-08-08 10:30:35 PM  
3 votes:
We know about this

2012-08-09 01:38:05 AM  
2 votes:
P: Something loose in cockpit.
S: Something tightened in cockpit.

P: DME volume unbelievably loud.
S: DME volume set to more believable level.

P: Flight attendant cold at altitude.
S: Ground checks OK.
2012-08-09 01:01:15 AM  
2 votes:

JericoPaladin: Kind of like posting a comment in some code that you know needs to be cleaned up... if it works similarly on planes during inspections (which seems to be the case according to some posters), then this is not a big deal.

About 30 years ago in my east coast town a steel light pole fell in a storm and karate-chopped my Vega Kammback, taking out the windshield and crushing in the roof.  Not surprisingly, the 8-year old station wagon was a total loss. Turned out that the base of the heavy pole, which could have been a half-century old, had rusted from many years of road salt, rain and snow, finally succumbing to particularly high winds one night.

This type of pole was ubiquitous, with thousands of them bearing faded dark green paint to be found throughout the city.  After tilting alternately at the city government and the local utility whilst they each pointed their fingers at the other I finally just settled through my own insurer and gave the matter no further thought. 

That is, until a few months later, when I began to notice what I thought was a new tagger in the area. The word "HOLE" began to appear, written with what I guessed was a white liquid shoe polish applicator on random light poles in my bustling university neighborhood.  The big block letters were scrawled vertically down dozens of the poles over the period of just a day or two. It seemed gritty and primal - quite apart from the stylistic, often brightly-colored graffiti I was used to seeing. I imagined a brooding, angry, rebellious artist, intent on shocking our urbane urban sensibilities, eschewing the typical flowery style of the 80's street artists for his simple, no-frills, and decidedly vulgar message.

For month or so I wondered if I
might catch a glimpse of Hole in the act of splashing his social statement at eye level for all to see. Admittedly, I was somewhat disappointed when I learned, through a brief mention in a "man on the street" feature in the city's alternative rag, that it was simply a misguided utility employee who had been tasked with inspecting the steel light poles and marking those found to be rusted through.

/Allstate let me keep the car and I later sold it to a guy for $450.
2012-08-09 12:24:41 AM  
2 votes:

AverageAmericanGuy: They serve good coffee on the flights, so that makes up for it.

Coffee? Every time I've flown Alaska they've served complimentary beer. Helps with the pressurization/depressurization issues.

/first world inner ear problems
2012-08-08 10:56:04 PM  
2 votes:
I don't know about that, but didn't the Titanic have a note on the hull, something about icebergs?
2012-08-08 10:54:12 PM  
2 votes:
My Dad was an aircraft mechanic. Growing up he would bring all kinds of fun things from work for me to play with. I got a big roll of speed tape. This stuff has to be used to be appreciated. I brought some to school and managed to tape shut a locker door. You couldn't peel it off or open the door. The janitor had to come to cut it.
2012-08-08 10:27:58 PM  
2 votes:
like tears in the wing... Time to die.
2012-08-08 10:27:27 PM  
2 votes:
Had the note read, "We do not know about this" then that would be something
2012-08-09 04:03:57 PM  
1 vote:

clear_prop: Bruxellensis: I once heard that a Boeing 747 is built to withstand the stress of doing several full loops. Not that a commercial airline pilot would do that. "Uuuuhhhhhhhhh.....this is your cap'n speaking......uuuuhhhhh...prepare your tray tables for some...uuuhhhh....loopty loops. Thank you."

The 707 prototype was rolled intentionally as a PR stunt.

The 747 has been rolled accidentally and landed safely. China Airlines Flight 6

Looping a commercial jet would be a challenge due to the altitude and speeds needed.

A loop is wings level and pull the nose up and over. A roll is nose pointed straight ahead and the wings rotate around the direction of flight.

One of my uncles flies 737s and says he's always wanted to pull a 1g barrel roll at night and see if any passengers notice.

(according to him the aircraft is more than capable of the maneuver, but in reality he'd never intentionally place the passengers in danger of course)
2012-08-09 07:24:12 AM  
1 vote:
P: Dead bugs on windshield.
S: Live bugs on order
2012-08-09 02:06:59 AM  
1 vote:
I picked the wrong week to stop sniffing glue.
2012-08-09 01:51:46 AM  
1 vote:
P: Right engine missing.
S: Right engine found on right wing after brief search.
2012-08-09 01:39:57 AM  
1 vote:
P: auto-land very rough
S: auto-land not installed on this aircraft.
2012-08-09 12:31:00 AM  
1 vote:
Tear? Since when do tears have perfect arcs? That was clearly a manmade cut. And a tiny one at that.

2012-08-08 11:44:28 PM  
1 vote:

moike: We'd be out somewhere, and a commercial jet would fly over... he'd point and laugh, and just say he had no clue how the hell it was staying up there. Not in an 'I do not understand basic flight physics' way, but in a 'I have no idea why those engines have not exploded yet' way.

Needless to say he hates to fly... i just figure if it's my time to go, I'm going fast enough that the last thing to go through my mind on impact will be the tray table.

The amount of shiat that commercial jets are built to take is just amazing. Multiple times per day, some minimum wage flunkies hit it with catering trucks and baggage loaders. They have to be able to go from 120 degrees to -60 degrees in 20 minutes, and have nothing crack. 500,000lbs of plane slamming into the ground on tires barely bigger than you'd find on a big rig.

The more you actually thing about it, the less comfortable it becomes.
2012-08-08 11:09:37 PM  
1 vote:
Just wait until they find out that often the remedy to keep fatigue cracks from propagating is to drill holes at the end points to relieve the stress concentration.
2012-08-08 11:08:00 PM  
1 vote:

Meh. A little tear is nothing.
2012-08-08 11:02:51 PM  
1 vote:

powhound: They call that a tear?

[ image 640x482]

2012-08-08 10:56:23 PM  
1 vote:
It was the Langoliers
2012-08-08 10:50:31 PM  
1 vote:
They call that a tear?
2012-08-08 10:44:06 PM  
1 vote:

KidneyStone: yawn. Nothing to see here.tortilla burger: Had the note read, "We do not know about this" then that would be something

And that something would be named "funny"

MrEricSir: Don't worry, it's Alaska Airlines so their technicians did 20 minutes of prayer before takeoff.

Ha! Some damn fine posts in this thread.
2012-08-08 10:35:09 PM  
1 vote:
pops to more decenter story
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