Do you have adblock enabled?
 
If you can read this, either the style sheet didn't load or you have an older browser that doesn't support style sheets. Try clearing your browser cache and refreshing the page.

(The Smoking Gun)   You grow 16 plants, and what do you get? Your picture in the Mugshot Review with your head in a net   (thesmokinggun.com ) divider line
    More: Dumbass, mug shots, plants  
•       •       •

10955 clicks; posted to Main » on 07 Aug 2012 at 4:07 AM (3 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



77 Comments   (+0 »)
   
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest

Archived thread

First | « | 1 | 2 | » | Last | Show all
 
2012-08-07 08:26:55 AM  
i.imgur.com
 
2012-08-07 08:28:16 AM  
i.imgur.com
 
2012-08-07 08:35:29 AM  
i.cdn.turner.com

1.bp.blogspot.com
 
2012-08-07 08:40:15 AM  
i877.photobucket.com

Hello everybody and welcome to another edition of This Ol' Ho'. We've been working on Starshine here for a couple of weeks and believe it or not, we are finally seeing results. We started down in the basement, realigning the pipes and getting them cleaned out. What a job that was! If you missed those five episodes, they're online. Not for the squeamish. Today, we're going to tackle the facade. Now, you may not be able to see it, but there appears to be a really solid base. Some of these old Ho's were built to high standards. They probably went to a finishing school or had very high maintenance done prior to becoming a Ho. You won't see that on the younger Ho's. They go right in to the business after dropping out of school. They don't get the substructure support these older ones have.

Anyhow, I've called in my good friend Gary from Gary's Sandblasting and Tuckpointing. Gary, what do you see her as you primary issue.

"Well, the paint will have to come out. We'll use a high pressure wet sander that will strip the old paint off without doing any damage to the base. I'll have two teams work each side simultaneously. Shouldn't take more than a day or two. "

Well, we'll lat you get started. The other problem area is here by the front entrance. It's been built up over the years and needs to be reduced. I've rented this industrial jack hammer to knock all the build up off. Now, you may be worried about using a jack hammer here. That you might damage the substructure but let me tell you, this part of the Ho is incredibly tough. If any part can take repeated and prolonged hammering, it's this spot right here.

Well, that's all the time we have this week. Next week, we'll show you what we uncovered and we'll start on the hair. It'll be a couple of weeks of chemical treatments but I think it's a better way to go than shaving and replanting. We'll see you next time on "This Ol' Ho'" Goodbye.
 
2012-08-07 08:52:23 AM  

Elegy: Onkel Buck: Always seems to be a lot of drag queens in these round ups. Why are they so violent? I guess walking around in high heels long enough with make anyone angry

Well, they're queens. What are you having problems understanding? They keep it real better more dramatically than black girls.

Plus, I would imagine that queens get shiat all day every day from everybody and their brother about being a queen. You know, random people pointing and yelling "lookit that freak, bubba!" and similar. I'm sure it contributes to making them edgy and confrontational.


I once heard that you should never pick a fight with a transvestite, because they've been fighting their whole life.
 
2012-08-07 09:01:16 AM  

Mini Ditka: [i.imgur.com image 340x408]


made my morning. and for that, I tip my cup o' java to you sir.
 
2012-08-07 09:03:38 AM  
i.cdn.turner.com

Hi everybody! I'm Renaldo.

And I'm Jericho and this is Ghey Eye for the Tattooed Guy.

Renaldo: Oh look at Mister Serious here. What a mess!

Jericho: Oh my yes. If you want to cover yourself in tats, fine, big boy. But at least have a plan!

Renaldo: I think he jus' went to the parlor ever week and and bought what was on sale!

Jericho: Well, let's start with the pluses. The tat on the adams apple is really well thought out. Good ink and good location. It's says "I'm a dude. Don't mess with me!"

Renaldo: Oh yes. And the forehead has a lot of important ink on it. You are definitely drawn up there.

Jericho: That dollar sign though. That should be a Question Mark 'cause I look at it and say "Why?"

Renaldo: True! If you're going with a dollar sign on the cheek, at least make it green, buddy. I look at that dollar sign and say 'that aint money'

Jericho: You can't put another monetary symbol on the other side for symmetry, friend? You went with a poorly inked MIA instead. Mixed messages.

Renaldo: To fix this, we need to go over some spots and merge a lot of the others in to one big message. Maybe bring some of the art from the back of the head forward.

Jericho: I say we just erase the big lug and start over. Hit 'em with the laser for a couple of day, bleach the skin and we'll have a new canvas on which we can create a master piece.

Renaldo:: What a wonderful idea. Let's get started immediately!

Commercial Break

Renaldo: It's been a couple of weeks. We cleaned off all the old tattoos, bleached up the skin and we are ready to go

t1.gstatic.com

Jericho: Uh, Reny? He says he doesn't want to get tatted again. Says he wants to go host "Let's Make a Deal".

Renaldo: Then go Mister What's Behind Curtain Number Three. We don't need you!

Jericho: Uh, we just blew our entire budget for the season on that guy.

Renaldo: Well, looks like this is the last episode of "Ghey Eye for the Tattooed Guy" I'll be reprising my role as broom jockey down at the Clip Joint on Cheshire Street.

Jericho: And I'm going back to my wealthy but closeted beneficiary.
 
2012-08-07 09:51:08 AM  
FTA: Arrested for corporal injury of a spouse.

I think someone forgot the Special word.

i.cdn.turner.com

/Also I thought they would give her something to cover herself up with.
 
2012-08-07 10:05:32 AM  
i50.tinypic.com
 
2012-08-07 10:09:35 AM  

Abe Vigoda's Ghost: [i50.tinypic.com image 300x1125]


could someone please morph this guy's photo into that infamous BRIAN PEPPERS photo?

i have zero skills AND i'm at work
 
2012-08-07 10:20:22 AM  

libranoelrose: Bathia_Mapes: NowhereMon: repeat, but I really don't understand that net thing

It's a weekly event. Lots of fun too since quite a few of the posters will do some photoshopping of the various mugshots.

[i.imgur.com image 500x625]

Sweet dreams...


The Corinthian has really let himself go. His skin is all leathery.

/get it? Corinthian leather??
//never mind
 
2012-08-07 10:30:09 AM  
i.imgur.com
 
2012-08-07 10:51:20 AM  

fusillade762: Arrested for resisting arrest.

Isn't this kind of a chicken/egg thing? If they hadn't tried to arrest him in the first place... I just... I don't get it.


This is exactly what I came here to ask. Any answers?
 
2012-08-07 11:25:18 AM  

Lolthien: fusillade762: Arrested for resisting arrest.

Isn't this kind of a chicken/egg thing? If they hadn't tried to arrest him in the first place... I just... I don't get it.

This is exactly what I came here to ask. Any answers?


It's a longshot, but what might have happened is that the cops were going to arrest him for some sort of a misdemeanor and then he started fighting. That's gross misdemeanor resisting arrest (resisting arrest w/force, or obstruction with force, depends on what the state statue calls it.) So he actually gets arrested for the gross misdemeanor and they just issue citations for whatever misdemeanors he had.
I have no idea if that's what happened, but it's one way.
 
2012-08-07 11:56:12 AM  
i.cdn.turner.com

YES


i.cdn.turner.com

NO

i.cdn.turner.com

HELL NO


i.cdn.turner.com

Maybe

i.cdn.turner.com

Yup

i.cdn.turner.com

She's A Man, Baby, A Man!
 
2012-08-07 12:06:40 PM  

cgw_niu: [i.cdn.turner.com image 480x600]

YES


[i.cdn.turner.com image 500x625]

NO

[i.cdn.turner.com image 498x627]

HELL NO


[i.cdn.turner.com image 477x599]

Maybe

[i.cdn.turner.com image 600x750]

Yup

[i.cdn.turner.com image 650x491]

She's A Man, Baby, A Man!


Im gonna say your "maybe" is a dude too, NTTIAWWT, you do what makes you happy.
 
2012-08-07 12:15:33 PM  

Onkel Buck: Im gonna say your "maybe" is a dude too, NTTIAWWT, you do what makes you happy.


AWE dammit!!! Will now need an inspection to remain in the maybe category
 
2012-08-07 12:21:45 PM  
i.imgur.com
 
2012-08-07 12:22:22 PM  
So Dave Grohl was arrested?

i907.photobucket.com

blog.chron.com
 
2012-08-07 12:44:56 PM  

Lolthien: fusillade762: Arrested for resisting arrest.

Isn't this kind of a chicken/egg thing? If they hadn't tried to arrest him in the first place... I just... I don't get it.

This is exactly what I came here to ask. Any answers?


A guy like that must be breaking some kind of law, so a cop probably stopped him while he was walking down the street and demanded to see his ID (happens to me now and then, and I don't look like... that.) This pissed him off because supposedly this isn't East Germany, so he refused, spoke belligerently, and walked away. The pig in question can't stand it when people refuse to respect his authoritah, so he went after the guy, grabbed his shoulder, and the guy shook him off. Hence, resisting arrest.

A person with more impulse control would grit his teeth and produce the damned ID, because as wrong and even evil as the cop's actions are, literally nothing good can come of it if he doesn't, but I somehow doubt this guy has impulse control.
 
2012-08-07 01:12:15 PM  
i.imgur.com
 
2012-08-07 03:45:45 PM  

Mini Ditka: [i.imgur.com image 614x383]


Nailed it, lol
 
2012-08-07 04:38:46 PM  
i.cdn.turner.com

YOU WEREN'T THERE, MAN
YOU WEREN'T THERE

 
2012-08-07 10:08:23 PM  

minnkat: [i.imgur.com image 824x770]


s1.hubimg.com
 
2012-08-08 03:15:34 AM  
i.imgur.com
static02.mediaite.com
 
2012-08-08 04:23:14 AM  
i.cdn.turner.com

sockergumman.blogg.se
 
2012-08-08 05:01:17 AM  
Still laughing, and occasionally shrinking back in horror. I love these threads.
 
Displayed 27 of 77 comments

First | « | 1 | 2 | » | Last | Show all

View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest


This thread is archived, and closed to new comments.

Continue Farking
Submit a Link »
On Twitter






In Other Media


  1. Links are submitted by members of the Fark community.

  2. When community members submit a link, they also write a custom headline for the story.

  3. Other Farkers comment on the links. This is the number of comments. Click here to read them.

  4. Click here to submit a link.

Report