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(Telegraph)   So is that a banana in your HOLY CRAP   ( divider line
    More: Scary, Holy Crap  
•       •       •

35572 clicks; posted to Main » on 05 Aug 2012 at 10:39 AM (4 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»

Voting Results (Funniest)
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest

2012-08-05 10:46:13 AM  
5 votes:

You're not gonna fall for the boa constrictor in the tailpipe?

It should be more natural, brother. It should flow out, like this: "Look, man, I ain't fallin' for no boa constrictor in my tailpipe!"
2012-08-05 11:04:19 AM  
3 votes:

2012-08-05 08:59:10 AM  
3 votes:
And now all her friends think her husband's wang, which she also described as as "banana-sized", is actually four feet long.
2012-08-05 10:52:23 AM  
2 votes:

oukewldave: This one sounds like a dingbat. How do you mistake a snake for a banana?
/ Ring ring ring


"I was going to pick up a rotten moldy banana but forgot about it for seven hundred days, then came back and the banana jumped up with a mouth and eyes! Then I grabbed my kids and ran for the hills but forgot how to open the door, so I just kept bumping into the door bump bump bump! Then I called animal control and they said I had to burn my house down to get rid of the banana eye snake"
2012-08-05 10:41:35 AM  
2 votes:
Those toddlers, always shoving moldy bananas in the darnedest places.
2012-08-05 10:07:12 AM  
2 votes:
2012-08-05 04:04:52 PM  
1 vote:
Back around 1990, I had a pet Red Tail Boa Constrictor. I was in the Navy at the time, and was on a Submarine.

Had to go on a Med Cruise, and I had someone take care of my snake. It was about 6 feet long, and about as big as my wrist. Had to feed it large Rats.

Somehow, she left to top open on the cage and the snake escaped.

3 months after this happened, I returned home, and was informed of what happened.

4 months after that, the Snake just showed up sitting in my kitchen sink... Bigger than before.

The apartment complex no longer had a rodent problem.
2012-08-05 12:43:48 PM  
1 vote:
2012-08-05 12:37:49 PM  
1 vote:
"But as the property was rented, the officer advised her to leave a tub full of water on the bathroom floor to entice the snake out."

Do you trust me?
2012-08-05 12:07:24 PM  
1 vote:
FTA: "It's a rented property so we couldn't do that, and in the end the officer said to put a box with some water in it, as snakes like water for some reason, and leave it there.

They get thirsty? That'd be my first guess...
2012-08-05 11:07:09 AM  
1 vote:
Oh, I'm being eaten
By a boa constrictor,
A boa constrictor,
A boa constrictor,
I'm being eaten by a boa constrictor,
And I don't like it--one bit.
Well, what do you know?
It's nibblin' my toe.
Oh, gee,
It's up to my knee.
Oh my,
It's up to my thigh.
Oh, fiddle,
It's up to my middle.
Oh, heck,
It's up to my neck.
Oh, dread,
It's upmmmmmmmmmmffffffffff...

-shel silverstein
2012-08-05 11:06:33 AM  
1 vote:

There's always money in the banana stand...
2012-08-05 10:58:51 AM  
1 vote:
Fifty Shades Of Boa
2012-08-05 10:47:40 AM  
1 vote:
I expected this to be a TSA-related story.
2012-08-05 10:46:42 AM  
1 vote:
So, what I'm getting out of this is that Britain must have very strange looking bananas.
Displayed 15 of 15 comments

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