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(Daily Stab)   Olympic gold medalist Ryan Lochte is all about the one night stands, says HIS MOM   (dailystab.com) divider line 54
    More: Silly, Ryan Lochte, one-night stands, olympics, gold medals, button-down shirt, mom  
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4897 clicks; posted to Entertainment » on 02 Aug 2012 at 8:55 PM (2 years ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2012-08-02 01:19:26 PM

Gyrfalcon: Dear god, he's a KID TOOL.


:|
 
2012-08-02 06:29:31 PM
Been a while since I wished SuperAIDS on someone. Guess I was due.
 
2012-08-02 06:33:46 PM
That's terrible.

Everyone knows you're supposed to have two night stands, one on each side of the bed.
 
2012-08-02 06:44:28 PM
Ew.
 
2012-08-02 07:00:24 PM
I have been rooting really hard for Phelps so I dont have to hear about this kid anymore.
 
2012-08-02 07:36:49 PM

Gunny Highway: I have been rooting really hard for Phelps so I dont have to hear about this kid anymore.


That's not how the media works.
 
2012-08-02 08:58:09 PM
the Olympic Village has a record 15,0000 free condoms floating around

That's some nice comma work there, Lou.
 
2012-08-02 09:02:55 PM
throw together a bunch of in-shape teenagers and twenty year old who have been missing out on parties and haven't been able to blow off any steam for years.


who could guess this would happen?
 
2012-08-02 09:06:15 PM

4NSpy: the Olympic Village has a record 15,0000 free condoms floating around

That's some nice comma work there, Lou.


Hey, for all we know they're using the British system.

/and excessive significant figures
 
2012-08-02 09:12:25 PM
Actually, his mom is covering up because she doesn't want it to get out that he has a black girlfriend. She is on the Love and Hip Hop Show on VH1. Her name is K Michelle. His mom thinks that K Michelle is too ghetto for him. I have never watched the show so I don't know.

http://cdn.mediatakeout.com/57556/mto-world-exclusive-love-and-hip-ho p -star-k-michelle-is-dating-olympic-swimmer-ryan-lochte-but-his-people- think-she-s-too-ghetto-for-him.html

For your entertainment.
 
2012-08-02 09:12:41 PM

IMDWalrus: 4NSpy: the Olympic Village has a record 15,0000 free condoms floating around

That's some nice comma work there, Lou.

Hey, for all we know they're using the British system.

/and excessive significant figures


That would be 15 condoms w/ a precision of 10^-4 condoms. Damn those silly Euros and their comma decimals and writing the date backwards.
 
2012-08-02 09:19:59 PM
You know who else likes bragging about my sexual conquests?

www.toonbarn.com
 
2012-08-02 09:22:05 PM

DoctorRock: thenewmissus: Actually, his mom is covering up because she doesn't want it to get out that he has a black girlfriend. She is on the Love and Hip Hop Show on VH1. Her name is K Michelle. His mom thinks that K Michelle is too ghetto for him. I have never watched the show so I don't know.

http://cdn.mediatakeout.com/57556/mto-world-exclusive-love-and-hip-ho p -star-k-michelle-is-dating-olympic-swimmer-ryan-lochte-but-his-people- think-she-s-too-ghetto-for-him.html

For your entertainment.

you can go straight to hell for making me read that


You're welcome. See you there. ; )

/bring water
//and ice
 
2012-08-02 09:31:19 PM
As his most recent ex I'm getting a kick out of these replies.

/not
 
2012-08-02 09:37:11 PM
Pimpin ain't easy....for Mama Lochte?
 
2012-08-02 09:42:20 PM
There is something about Ryan Lochte that just makes me want to punch him in the mouth every time I see him... Maybe it's the way he wears his hat... maybe it's the grill... I can't decide which.
 
2012-08-02 09:51:42 PM
I live in Omaha, that's RIGHT the BIG Omaha.

You know the one that had the MMVII & MMXII Olympic Swim Trials.

(do I have to put a bing map here?)

On the 1st day of trials I got to escort Ryan Lochte around for doping control. I also got to hold his shoes.

Everytime they talk about the swimmers.
 
2012-08-02 09:58:46 PM
Fark needs an "Awkward" tag. Seriously.
 
2012-08-02 10:10:32 PM
Good for him, he's young and good looking, might as well enjoy the benefits of that. Although I hope when he said he single in London and is gunna have a good time he meant with other Olympians and not the local London skanks.
 
2012-08-02 10:33:35 PM
too bad he's dumb as dirt

/Dumb
 
2012-08-02 10:36:01 PM
chicks dig swimmers
 
2012-08-02 10:36:50 PM
Dear god, he's a KID.

Let him f*ck around, as long as he uses protection.
 
2012-08-02 10:47:40 PM
As someone who could be considered somewhat of a role model for younger kids shouldn't he keep these sorts of antics private. I don't really care what he does in his spare time but I don't think he needs to talk about it in every interview he does.
 
2012-08-02 10:56:55 PM

Thac0isWhac0: There is something about Ryan Lochte that just makes me want to punch him in the mouth every time I see him... Maybe it's the way he wears his hat... maybe it's the grill... I can't decide which.


Ever heard him talk? He makes NBA players sound smart.
 
2012-08-02 11:20:15 PM

Thac0isWhac0: There is something about Ryan Lochte that just makes me want to punch him in the mouth every time I see him... Maybe it's the way he wears his hat... maybe it's the grill... I can't decide which.


Well Phelps just beat him for the gold. That probably hurts worse than a single punch.
 
2012-08-02 11:54:00 PM
dibs
 
2012-08-03 12:02:59 AM

wookiee cookie: dibs


on what, his sloppy seconds? Now that I think about it, the quality of the tail he gets would make that worth while. Danm!!!
 
2012-08-03 12:04:10 AM

thenewmissus: Actually, his mom is covering up because she doesn't want it to get out that he has a black girlfriend. She is on the Love and Hip Hop Show on VH1. Her name is K Michelle. His mom thinks that K Michelle is too ghetto for him. I have never watched the show so I don't know.

http://cdn.mediatakeout.com/57556/mto-world-exclusive-love-and-hip-ho p -star-k-michelle-is-dating-olympic-swimmer-ryan-lochte-but-his-people- think-she-s-too-ghetto-for-him.html

For your entertainment.


I haven't been this confused about a white athlete since Dirk from four days ago.

i.imgur.com
 
2012-08-03 12:35:50 AM
woulda figured him for a poofter.

/ not really
// lucky sumbiatch
 
2012-08-03 12:45:25 AM
Mom, I told you it would be just a one time thing. Don't be mad.
 
2012-08-03 01:04:32 AM

thenewmissus: For your entertainment.


This is the sort of stuff you can't make up. I love you, fark.
 
2012-08-03 01:18:42 AM
She also said that he sleeps in the nude, which is way more info than I needed from his MOM.
/different article
 
2012-08-03 01:48:33 AM

miss jinxed: too bad he's dumb as dirt

/Dumb


That reminds me of the interview from Talladega Nights. Except sad instead of funny, since it's real.
 
2012-08-03 02:18:35 AM
Good God, he's Spicoli.

"I like swimming because...racing."
 
2012-08-03 02:35:44 AM
encrypted-tbn3.google.com

Why don't you have a seat right over there.
 
2012-08-03 02:54:27 AM

Gig103: miss jinxed: too bad he's dumb as dirt

/Dumb

That reminds me of the interview from Talladega Nights. Except sad instead of funny, since it's real.


i was thinking more Zoolander
 
2012-08-03 04:13:53 AM
No, she said - "My boy is too good for any of you strumpets."
 
2012-08-03 04:17:12 AM
For all the hype, Lochte has been a bust.

Sure, Phelps hasn't been any better (well, he was in that relay...), but Phelps is OLD. And busted.
 
2012-08-03 05:17:29 AM

DoctorRock: thenewmissus: Actually, his mom is covering up because she doesn't want it to get out that he has a black girlfriend. She is on the Love and Hip Hop Show on VH1. Her name is K Michelle. His mom thinks that K Michelle is too ghetto for him. I have never watched the show so I don't know.

http://cdn.mediatakeout.com/57556/mto-world-exclusive-love-and-hip-ho p -star-k-michelle-is-dating-olympic-swimmer-ryan-lochte-but-his-people- think-she-s-too-ghetto-for-him.html

For your entertainment.

you can go straight to hell for making me read that


t3.gstatic.com
 
2012-08-03 05:21:12 AM

underwhere: As someone who could be considered somewhat of a role model for younger kids shouldn't he keep these sorts of antics private. I don't really care what he does in his spare time but I don't think he needs to talk about it in every interview he does.


Bruce says, fark you.
cdn04.cdnwp.celebuzz.com

/why are all porno chicks, stars?
 
2012-08-03 09:24:36 AM

puffy999: For all the hype, Lochte has been a bust.

Sure, Phelps hasn't been any better (well, he was in that relay...), but Phelps is OLD. And busted.


he is the overall medal leader at this Olympics with 5 (2 gold 2 silver 1 bronze). He did just scratch himself from his last event so he could start penetrating the pussay.
 
2012-08-03 09:41:12 AM

bill4935: You know who else likes bragging about my sexual conquests?

[www.toonbarn.com image 600x300]


Came here for this, leaving satisfied.
 
2012-08-03 09:48:59 AM

Thac0isWhac0: There is something about Ryan Lochte that just makes me want to punch him in the mouth every time I see him... Maybe it's the way he wears his hat... maybe it's the grill... I can't decide which.


It's the grill, son. I'd curb stomp him just for the lulz of seeing his diamond-encrusted teeth tumble down into the gutter.

And it seems like his dad is a dick, too. Who the FARK wears a shirt and tie to the Olympics, unless you're an IOC executive?
 
2012-08-03 09:52:34 AM
Is all this hate jealousy on the part of Farkers?

1) Who cares?
2) He's already a well-established medaling olympian in his own right--one of the best in the world in his chosen sport--so who cares?
3) Sex is fun, and we would do well as a species if we had more of it versus more violence, so as long as he isn't raping everybody up in here, he's still a better role model than most, so who cares?
4) If I was going to the Olympics I'd want to be single too, so who cares?

I say awesome for him for taking full advantage of his situation in life, and despite the moderate societally-mandated weirdness of it, good for his family to be open enough about things that his mom knows his shiat.
 
2012-08-03 10:18:28 AM
I saw him on an NBC interview this morning, and the woman interviewing him asked just what was up. Ryan tried to brush it off with a, "Yeah, my mom means that because I'm training all the time, I have no time to develop relationships. It's always one date and done."

The (hot and blonde) interviewer held her papers up to cover her face while he replied. I like to think she mouthed the words, "Call me."
 
2012-08-03 11:07:42 AM
Very classy to have mommy making excuses for her 28-yr-old baby boy being a manwhore.

/unexpected Lochte grandchild in 3...2...1...
//if he has siblings, does she cut them the same amount of slack?
 
2012-08-03 12:27:14 PM

miss jinxed: too bad he's dumb as dirt

/Dumb


I feel bad making fun of him now after watching that.

It's not nice to make fun of the mentally handicapped.
 
2012-08-03 12:28:18 PM
At least he's bothering to actually have a date first. That's class.
 
2012-08-03 02:08:37 PM

StoPPeRmobile: underwhere: As someone who could be considered somewhat of a role model for younger kids shouldn't he keep these sorts of antics private. I don't really care what he does in his spare time but I don't think he needs to talk about it in every interview he does.

Bruce says, fark you.
[cdn04.cdnwp.celebuzz.com image 580x435]

/why are all porno chicks, stars?


That's clearly Julia Child's head photoshopped on Jenner's body.

/Wait, you mean that's real?
//DAMN
 
2012-08-03 02:31:23 PM
He's Mom is Milfy enough - I would do her while he's out!!
 
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