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(93.9 MIA)   The all-time shiattiest hiding place to avoid police capture: a motel septic tank   (939mia.com) divider line 58
    More: Dumbass, septic tanks, The Modesto Bee, Ninth Street, Stanislaus County  
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4904 clicks; posted to Main » on 01 Aug 2012 at 3:46 PM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2012-08-01 01:28:58 PM
I sense a new Urban Dictionary entry coming on.
 
2012-08-01 01:47:33 PM
Once again, hope is just a shiatty pipe dream.
 
2012-08-01 02:02:28 PM
cftfitness.files.wordpress.com
 
2012-08-01 03:49:39 PM
Was the grass greener over this septic tank?
 
2012-08-01 03:50:00 PM
That place stinks.
 
2012-08-01 03:50:45 PM
I. Am. So. Clever.

D'oh!
 
2012-08-01 03:51:30 PM
Great place to hide books on how to make insulin and whatnot in case of meteor impact.
 
2012-08-01 03:53:41 PM
What a dump.
 
2012-08-01 03:53:45 PM
FTA: "Firefighters responded to the scene to extricate the man, but he didn't want to be rescued. Battalion Chief Bryan Hunt estimates that the tank is about 7 feet deep and said the liquid inside it reached the man's shoulders."

"COME OUT? NO THANKS. I'LL STAY HERE. BYE"
 
2012-08-01 03:57:10 PM

basemetal: [cftfitness.files.wordpress.com image 720x482]


Feces what you did there.
 
2012-08-01 03:57:20 PM
Too early for Joe Dirt? I'll be back later.
 
2012-08-01 03:57:36 PM
psy317harvind.files.wordpress.com
 
2012-08-01 03:58:17 PM
c'mon subby

i'm trying to have lunch over here.
 
2012-08-01 04:02:45 PM
Who's the lousy stool pidgeon who sqealed on him?
 
2012-08-01 04:06:07 PM
Ceres firefighters responded to the scene to extricate the man, but he didn't want to be rescued.

Bad Boys, Bad Boys
Whatcha gonna do?
Whatcha gonna do when you're standing in poo?
 
2012-08-01 04:09:03 PM

improvius:


Schindler's shiat list?
 
2012-08-01 04:10:28 PM
Ceres firefighters responded to the scene to exrement the man, but he didn't want to be rescued.
 
2012-08-01 04:15:22 PM
He really didn't want to raise a big stink.
 
2012-08-01 04:26:43 PM

SnarfVader: I sense a new Urban Dictionary entry coming on.


Motel Septic Tank (noun): A woman that's so skanky, you wouldn't even do her with your worst enemy's dick. Usage:"Stay away from her, she's a motel septic tank".

(verb):...nah, I can't even think up a definition for that.
 
2012-08-01 04:31:56 PM
Before he died a WWII vet (friend of my dad) recalled his narrow miss of capture by German soldiers.
During the first stage of the Battle of the Bulge he and three others were cut off behind German lines in heavy snow. They hid,standing, for four days in a septic tank adjacent to a farmhouse as German troops
passed by.Not until the tides of battle turned were they able to rejoin American troops and continue into battle.I guess the moral of this story is if you really don't want to be caught you'll be willing to stand in any old hole in the ground.
 
2012-08-01 04:35:36 PM

oh_please: Ceres firefighters responded to the scene to extricate the man, but he didn't want to be rescued.

Bad Boys, Bad Boys
Whatcha gonna do?
Whatcha gonna do when you're standing in poo?


I'm quite amused at this. How long are you gonna stay down there?

I guess the logic is that the cop and firefighters would be so disgusted he would simply leave? "Let it go, man"? And he could sneak out and run off in a few hours? I guess that's within the realm of Crazy Person Thinking.

I know how to get him out. How many gallons is the capacity? Get a hose. We're the fire department, don't we have a hose? ...THEY ALL FLOAT DOWN HERE!!!
 
2012-08-01 04:37:17 PM

sweet-daddy-2: Before he died a WWII vet (friend of my dad) recalled his narrow miss of capture by German soldiers.
During the first stage of the Battle of the Bulge he and three others were cut off behind German lines in heavy snow. They hid,standing, for four days in a septic tank adjacent to a farmhouse as German troops
passed by.Not until the tides of battle turned were they able to rejoin American troops and continue into battle.I guess the moral of this story is if you really don't want to be caught you'll be willing to stand in any old hole in the ground.


If Helen Keller had that kind of resolve, she never would have been captured by the Nazis. I guess it just comes down to what you're willing to go through.
 
2012-08-01 04:44:43 PM
Here's a fun fact...

In England a slang term for an American is 'septic'.

septic: n American: Hey, did you hear Bob had moved to New York and married a septic? From Cockney rhyming slang "septic tank" / "yank," where "yank" is in turn used in the U.K. to mean "American." The Australians use the same term and have further abbreviated septic to "seppo."

/The more you know?
 
2012-08-01 04:44:49 PM
If, when running from the cops, you think that a septic tank is a good hiding place perhaps a life of crime isn't for you.
 
2012-08-01 04:50:43 PM
Poop Thread! XD
 
2012-08-01 04:55:53 PM

blatz514: Ceres firefighters responded to the scene to exrement the man, but he didn't want to be rescued.


Highlighting your own spelling errors? I mean, not to be a grammar nazi, but you're just taunting at this point.
 
2012-08-01 04:58:19 PM
Poop-pipe to the crap-swamp.
 
2012-08-01 05:03:39 PM
Ok, how far out in the country is that motel? It's apparently so far out in the country that it needs its own septic tank, rather than being hooked up to a munucipal sewage authority.
 
2012-08-01 05:07:44 PM

Tanthalas39: blatz514: Ceres firefighters responded to the scene to exrement the man, but he didn't want to be rescued.

Highlighting your own spelling errors? I mean, not to be a grammar nazi, but you're just taunting at this point.


goddamittsomuch. You know what the really retarded thing about this is that I actually googled it so I would spell it correctly.

/can't even blame alcohol.
 
2012-08-01 05:12:26 PM
No Subby, it is the all-time shiattiest place to be FOUND trying to avoid police capture, if it works and you stay out of jail it's not so bad. I presume since this link was posted, someone was FOUND trying to hide in such a palce, which is why it is truly shiatty.
 
2012-08-01 05:21:11 PM
Wouldn't that tank just be slowing filling up with used condoms? What's the break down rate on those?
 
2012-08-01 05:21:56 PM

illannoyin: Here's a fun fact...

In England a slang term for an American is 'septic'.

septic: n American: Hey, did you hear Bob had moved to New York and married a septic? From Cockney rhyming slang "septic tank" / "yank," where "yank" is in turn used in the U.K. to mean "American." The Australians use the same term and have further abbreviated septic to "seppo."

/The more you know?


Here's another fun fact: All rhyming slangs are a pointless waste of effort and show little sense of wit.
 
2012-08-01 05:26:21 PM
A man caused a disturbance this morning,
When the police came he did split,
Looking around for a place to hide,
He jumped in a big tank of Shaving Cream


shiat smelling foulness I can't even imagine, or maybe I just don't want to.
 
2012-08-01 05:29:53 PM

trappedspirit: Wouldn't that tank just be slowing filling up with used condoms? What's the break down rate on those?


Eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeewwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww w w.
 
2012-08-01 05:32:58 PM
Living in Modesto, he was already in a shiat-hole.
 
2012-08-01 05:48:57 PM
cdn.9laughs.com

/couldn't find it sans the stupid caption
 
2012-08-01 06:02:20 PM
A Moesto man crawled to freedom jail through 7 feet of poo-smelling foulness I can't even imagine. Or maybe I just don't want to.
 
2012-08-01 06:11:43 PM
Ceres firefighters responded to the scene to extricate the man, but he didn't want to be rescued.

Battalion Chief Bryan Hunt estimates that the tank is about 7 feet deep and said the liquid inside it reached the man's shoulders.


Ok..so..weld the lid down and call it a day. He's where he wants to be...the taxpayers don't have to spend any more money on his ass. And really, why would you be willing to hide in sewage up to your shoulders to avoid a minor law infraction?
 
2012-08-01 06:19:40 PM
He climbed out and lit a smoke.
NOW THAT is a determined smoker if he kept his cigarettes and lighter dry while up to his shoulders in shiat!

The idea of hiding in a septic tank gives me nightmares! I saw a low budget SCI-FI movie called the 'Reeker' where this guy busted into a hotel septic tank and swam around looking for his car keys to escape.
 
2012-08-01 06:29:45 PM
Nice little addendum: "Read more about this disgusting story at The Modesto Bee." Great journalism.
 
2012-08-01 06:32:35 PM
I can't even imagine. Or maybe I just don't want to.
 
2012-08-01 06:36:46 PM
As someone who once fell into a septic tank, I'm getting....well, no....EWWWWWW.

I was walking through the yard and the lid gave way under me. I suddenly found myself hip deep in shiat and I had managed to tear my foot open from a piece of rebar on the way down. I must have used half a gallon of alcohol cleaning that wound.

The worst part, though? That happened in November, when we moved out of the house in the middle of the following March, the tank hadn't been repaired and was still open with only a plastic tarp over it.

/never renting from family again
 
2012-08-01 06:41:51 PM
I've done it in the sewer pipes..... couldn't have our parents seeing us naked together............ I don't see the big deal.
 
2012-08-01 06:45:00 PM
AHH Chief can you send a backup car to take suspect to booking....
 
2012-08-01 07:00:50 PM
Sure did pick a bad day to quit smoking. Hey wait, I still got my Zippo so I can at least see what I'm doing.
 
2012-08-01 07:40:55 PM
I submitted this story from the Modesto Bee this morning. I really think Drew should review who the fark is greenlighting stories. A change is needed.

Here is the originating newspaper's link.

/Feel free to submit the Welcome to Fark photo. Or butthurt. Or etc...
 
2012-08-01 07:41:41 PM
It worked for me, once, in New Delhi.
 
2012-08-01 07:49:15 PM
I heard the guy couldn't swim, but he went through all the movements.
 
2012-08-01 07:50:54 PM
Was he just a little drunk, or was he really shiat-faced?
 
2012-08-01 07:55:07 PM

Bit'O'Gristle: Ceres firefighters responded to the scene to extricate the man, but he didn't want to be rescued.

Battalion Chief Bryan Hunt estimates that the tank is about 7 feet deep and said the liquid inside it reached the man's shoulders.

Ok..so..weld the lid down and call it a day. He's where he wants to be...the taxpayers don't have to spend any more money on his ass. And really, why would you be willing to hide in sewage up to your shoulders to avoid a minor law infraction?


Because you think it will work?

"If I really stink and I'm covered in fermented shiat, maybe the cops won't WANT to take me in! I'm a genius!"
 
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