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(Gawker)   Girl Responsible for 'Worst National Anthem Performance Ever' Gets Second Chance to show that, well, she just cannot sing well   (gawker.com ) divider line
    More: Followup, Harper Gruzins, The Star-Spangled Banner  
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5693 clicks; posted to Entertainment » on 31 Jul 2012 at 5:28 PM (3 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



99 Comments   (+0 »)
   
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2012-07-31 07:25:48 PM  
What?! And more importantly,why?
 
2012-07-31 07:27:47 PM  
...and there are several more in this hilarious video of the top ten worst renditions that are far worse than hers.
 
2012-07-31 07:37:41 PM  

CommieTaoist: Yeah, right, every 11 yo girl who sings in the shower is a diva nowadays. Don't put your daughter up to such an humiliating feat, just wait for the Kidz Bop callback instead. If she must sing the National Anthem, have her sing the farking song, don't have her ham it up with the chops she don't have.


I agree. Seriously parents, it's one thing to encourage your child, it's a whole other thing to just plain lie to your kids and humiliate them nationwide.

/probably sings better than me, but I'm wise enough to know my limitations and to not try that in public
 
2012-07-31 07:41:34 PM  
She really embodies that Texas spirit of "We're mediocre but we'll never admit it."
 
2012-07-31 07:50:03 PM  
well, my cat decided that something in the computer monitor or speakers was officially his life nemesis as soon as that video played.
my cat hates her to the point of knocking speakers off my farking desk.
thats all i have to say about that.

/not as bad, but tone deaf and... so many wrong things technically speaking from a vocal standpoint.
 
2012-07-31 07:56:52 PM  
My husband and I happened to see that televised live. We weren't really paying attention, but then we had to because she was so out of tune, yet so confident. It was impressive, but I forgot about it. When I saw this headline, I knew exactly who it was, though.

Poor thing.
 
2012-07-31 07:59:57 PM  
img.gawkerassets.com

Yeah, I'm not going to play an embedded video if the screencap at the top of the article looks like she's in the middle of knocking out a stomper.
 
2012-07-31 08:01:17 PM  
This kid will have her own reality show in a few months. Just wait.
 
2012-07-31 08:05:18 PM  

rudemix: Was this mom's career choice for her daughter after she got to be too old for Toddlers and Tiaras?


From appearances, yes.
 
2012-07-31 08:07:58 PM  

Psycoholic_Slag: This kid will have her own reality show in a few months. Just wait.


Agreed. Why else would the troll-in-training do this?
 
2012-07-31 08:19:42 PM  
roflrazzi.files.wordpress.com

2.bp.blogspot.com
 
2012-07-31 08:40:30 PM  

ManateeGag: maybe if she didn't extend EVERY SINGLE NOTE, it wouldn't have been that bad.


Hence why I blame Christina Aguilera for all of this.
 
2012-07-31 08:45:20 PM  
 
2012-07-31 08:48:07 PM  
Subby, please never put ", well," in writing ever again. In fact, nobody ever say it again. Real people don't talk that way.
 
2012-07-31 08:56:10 PM  

assjuice: Subby, please never put ", well," in writing ever again. In fact, nobody ever say it again. Real people don't talk that way.


Yes. Listen to assjuice. This guys sounds legit.


/assjuice
 
2012-07-31 08:58:09 PM  
Well, that was better. Not like she had a high bar to clear, though.

Soft bigotry, meet lowered expectations.
 
2012-07-31 08:58:56 PM  
She's 11. I'll give HER a pass, as long as she learns geometry. Her parents, however, should be boiled in oil as they watch every show of American Idol and X-Factor. The oil should be kept at a temperature insuring a reasonable amount of pain but no inability to hear.
 
2012-07-31 09:02:05 PM  
This performance makes me question my long-held belief that it is always wrong to stuff a dick in an 11 year-old girl's mouth.
 
2012-07-31 09:09:15 PM  

Jim from Saint Paul: The. Worst. Star. Spangled. Banner. EVER.



Too farking funny. Thanks for this!
 
2012-07-31 09:11:06 PM  

Pocket Ninja: Actually, she doesn't sound that bad there. The song is awful, but the National Anthem is a wretched, terrible song anyway.

She's also 11. But, hey, go for blood.


gotta agree. I'd imagine that she can sing other songs ok. I'm of the belief that any anthem should be kept to just instruments.

/Canadian, not a fan of ours either
 
2012-07-31 09:14:14 PM  
I dated an opera singer years ago. She taught singing lessons on the side, mostly to kids. Parent after parent would come to her with their little phenom snowflake who couldn't sing worth shiat. Apparently we're born with perfect pitch, but we lose it at around age four or five. But most people don't know this, so they bring their little 4 year old singing genius in for singing lessons and then can't understand when the kid's voice goes to hell a year later.
 
2012-07-31 09:23:31 PM  
Here is the instrumental equivalent of this girl's version.

Link
 
2012-07-31 09:27:28 PM  

Apos: Jim from Saint Paul: The. Worst. Star. Spangled. Banner. EVER.


Too farking funny. Thanks for this!


BRAAAAAAAAAAAAAVE.
 
2012-07-31 10:10:41 PM  
Dear Little Snowflake,

Singing is not your future. Direct your energy elsewhere.

Yes, I'm sure you have been singing "all your life", but 11 isn't too old to move on to a new career. Shiat, I own socks that are older than you.

Half of life's lessons are learning from what you did wrong and applying that knowledge to future endeavors.

Best Wishes,

Devolving_Spud (who also does not sing for a living)
 
2012-07-31 10:18:58 PM  

Jim from Saint Paul: assjuice: Subby, please never put ", well," in writing ever again. In fact, nobody ever say it again. Real people don't talk that way.

Yes. Listen to assjuice. This guys sounds legit.


/assjuice


Drink from that fountain of wisdom.

/Booty Sweat
 
2012-07-31 10:34:19 PM  

Shostie: Quasar: whatever that musical convention is that makes them draw out notes during anthems and R&B songs

Melisma.


I thought that was swamp gas.
 
2012-07-31 10:37:59 PM  
I want to chain her to a radiator and feed her Alpo from my ass-crack.
 
2012-07-31 10:40:14 PM  

NewportBarGuy: Jim from Saint Paul: assjuice: Subby, please never put ", well," in writing ever again. In fact, nobody ever say it again. Real people don't talk that way.

Yes. Listen to assjuice. This guys sounds legit.


/assjuice

Drink from that fountain of wisdom.

/Booty Sweat


*sluuuuuuuuuurrrrrrrrrrrrrrppp*
 
2012-07-31 10:51:12 PM  
She's no Bianca Ryan, for sure.

/also eleven here
 
2012-07-31 11:35:59 PM  
Ironically she's trying too hard. if she had relaxed, it would have been much better.
 
2012-08-01 12:06:39 AM  
I'd hit her... parents with a brick... and then send her away to a foster home.
 
2012-08-01 12:15:38 AM  
What that kid needs is a singing teacher that'll be honest and tell her mother to get the HELL out of the music business.

My mother was my singing teacher for years, but lords, mine was classically trained to do that kind of thing, not just some backwoods piano teacher exploiting her kid for the fame.
 
2012-08-01 01:28:38 AM  

Ow! That was my feelings!: tudorgurl: Poor girl. I blame the mother.


This.

She's 11 -- do you think it was only her idea to setup a website and pursue this career? Maybe she really likes to sing, but I have no doubt that she has a set of parents that are riding her very hard to do this. If she were 16, I'd think differently. There's no way her mom isn't behind this, probably pushing her daughter to live a life she wished she had.
 
2012-08-01 01:54:59 AM  
forum.paticik.com
 
2012-08-01 02:03:52 AM  
Is she retarded? Are the people around her putting her up to this and granting permission retarded?

Wait, what? Texas?

Nevermind.

Where the fu*k is that Texas tag?
 
2012-08-01 02:32:10 AM  
I was just telling a friend about hearing a terrible version of the star spangled banner and having to walk into the tv room to see what it was all about. Funny to see there was an article written about it
 
2012-08-01 05:16:34 AM  
I do theatre in that area. It never ceases to amaze me how many "stage moms" there are in Coppell and how they think their spoiled, ADHD snowflake is incredibly talented. The few times I've worked with Coppell children I'm surprised I didn't end up in jail for murder.
 
2012-08-01 08:48:15 AM  
Were I one of the sound techs working that event, I'd threaten to sue that biatch of a mother for defamation and slander. Does she even know how sound equipment works?

"Listen, wench...using the levels on a soundboard, I can make her sound like a chipmunk, and alien or even the Devil. But I cannot make her sound off-key. Sound equipment does not work that way."
 
2012-08-01 09:02:24 AM  

shower_in_my_socks: I dated an opera singer years ago. She taught singing lessons on the side, mostly to kids. Parent after parent would come to her with their little phenom snowflake who couldn't sing worth shiat. Apparently we're born with perfect pitch, but we lose it at around age four or five. But most people don't know this, so they bring their little 4 year old singing genius in for singing lessons and then can't understand when the kid's voice goes to hell a year later.


Actually it depends mostly on the native language of the kid too. Tonal languages, like Mandarin for instance, actually develop a more musically inclined ear an sustain a life long perfect pitch in most of its speakers. There was an experiment where a group of gifted students from a music conservatory were asked to identify some notes upon hearing them and more often than not the Asian born kids or kids who spoke tonal language at home had a superior accuracy when compared to their English speaking counterparts. This is why when you were 11 and still playing Heart and Soul that 7 year old Chinese girl was pounding out Rachmaninoff.
 
2012-08-01 10:27:55 AM  
Melisma is the enemy of decent singing.

Anyone who relies on vocal histrionics to make their name in music isn't a singer; They're a warbler, screecher, wailer, or show-off. Whitney Houston, Celine Dion, and Christina Aquilera were all examples of what not to do as a singer.

Not everything has to sound like a drawn-out, over-the-top gospel song. Learn WHEN to use the vocal tricks, and when to stick to the notes in front of you.
 
2012-08-01 10:30:12 AM  

KatjaMouse: shower_in_my_socks: I dated an opera singer years ago. She taught singing lessons on the side, mostly to kids. Parent after parent would come to her with their little phenom snowflake who couldn't sing worth shiat. Apparently we're born with perfect pitch, but we lose it at around age four or five. But most people don't know this, so they bring their little 4 year old singing genius in for singing lessons and then can't understand when the kid's voice goes to hell a year later.

Actually it depends mostly on the native language of the kid too. Tonal languages, like Mandarin for instance, actually develop a more musically inclined ear an sustain a life long perfect pitch in most of its speakers. There was an experiment where a group of gifted students from a music conservatory were asked to identify some notes upon hearing them and more often than not the Asian born kids or kids who spoke tonal language at home had a superior accuracy when compared to their English speaking counterparts. This is why when you were 11 and still playing Heart and Soul that 7 year old Chinese girl was pounding out Rachmaninoff.


To be fair, nobody "pounds out" Rachmaninoff. Not even Rachmaninoff.
 
2012-08-01 11:11:09 AM  
Did not click. Urban Yodeling?
 
2012-08-01 11:17:16 AM  
can't we just have a sporting event without "up and coming singer/songwriter butchers the national anthem and it takes 4 minutes even though the song is 1 minute long"
 
2012-08-01 11:24:58 AM  
static2.dmcdn.net
You guys are slippin'...
 
2012-08-01 11:45:30 AM  
it would help if she didn't try to sing like her idol Christina Aguilera
 
2012-08-01 03:31:53 PM  
TLC was already seen knocking down her door.
 
2012-08-01 09:24:37 PM  

Miss Stein: She's no Bianca Ryan, for sure.

/also eleven here


Better, no doubt. Lots of times she cut corners pronouncing words, specifically plurals.

Not being a dick, I just prefer it to be sung CORRECTLY.

/at least this kid can sing though
 
2012-08-02 03:30:46 AM  

Jim from Saint Paul: Miss Stein: She's no Bianca Ryan, for sure.

/also eleven here

Better, no doubt. Lots of times she cut corners pronouncing words, specifically plurals.

Not being a dick, I just prefer it to be sung CORRECTLY.

/at least this kid can sing though


Ya...I noticed the same thing with her enunciation, but I wasn't sure how much of what I was hearing was that vs. the horrible acoustics/reverb/recording. I can't stand when singers enunciate either lazily or in a modified/unnatural manner. This is why I hated emo. I was taught by classical/opera and theater singers to modify a lot in order to perfect tone; but then had to undo it all later with a rock/pop teacher in order to sound more natural. I was taught that a big part of finding/creating your own unique style is enunciating the way you speak, which obviously varies across regions and individuals. I guess it just depends what style you're going for.
 
2012-08-02 10:09:49 AM  
Poor kid.

With a good teacher, lots of work, and a realistic assessment of her abilities she could be a decent singer. She at least wouldn't be an embarrassment.

However, it looks like she has her mom "helping" her, and her mom isn't honest about what she is and isn't good at, and needs to work on. I wonder if the kid has even ever heard a recording of herself. Unless she's tone deaf, she should be able to listen to herself and realize she has a LONG way to go. And trying to do all kinds of "fancy" vocal work doesn't cover up your inadequacies, it brings attention to them.
 
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