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(Sun Sentinel)   Man found hiding in church closet after urinating in child's tricycle basket. Then things get all Florida-y   (sun-sentinel.com) divider line 20
    More: Florida, florida, Sunday School, hiding, Baptist church, burglary  
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4635 clicks; posted to Main » on 31 Jul 2012 at 9:40 AM (2 years ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2012-07-31 08:22:51 AM  
FTFA: "I'm not paying the $5,000 fine, that's outrageous," King said. "It has nothing to do with me."
Broward County Judge John "Jay" Hurley lowered his bond amount to $3,500.


Next week on Law & Order: kindergarten pretend time:
Johnny: We know you took the cookie.
Suzy: Nuh uh.
Johnny: Yuh-huh!
Judge Sammy: Counselors, approach the bench.
*whisper whisper*
Judge Sammy: Defendant is to be released, pending further investigation on the grounds that Johnny is a stupid head. Find the Wuzzles, and bring them in for questioning.
 
2012-07-31 09:16:37 AM  
"I'm not paying the $5,000 fine, that's outrageous," King said. "It has nothing to do with me."

Broward County Judge John "Jay" Hurley lowered his bond amount to $3,500.

In an exchange with Hurley, King maintained his innocence.

"I didn't break in, the door was open," King said.

"Clearly he doesn't know the elements to burglary," Hurley said in response.


This may be my favorite court room exchange ever.
 
2012-07-31 09:44:22 AM  
Pissing on a tricycle is how Catholic priests mark their territory.
 
2012-07-31 09:45:01 AM  
So according to his statement, he was just minding his own business, peeing his pants and cutting up his clothes when the cops broke in and arrested him. Welcome to Obama's America!
 
2012-07-31 09:51:03 AM  
Neck beard + mullet. Looks like one of life's wieners!
 
2012-07-31 10:01:21 AM  
A tisket a tasket, a micturated basket.
 
2012-07-31 10:06:08 AM  
Piss Christ
 
2012-07-31 10:18:26 AM  
While I can appreciate subby's play on "get all stabby", Florida-y just seems a tad awkward.

I propose "Florida-licious".
 
2012-07-31 10:19:47 AM  
Where's he supposed to piss? On the floor? That would be rude
 
2012-07-31 10:22:55 AM  

probesport: A tisket a tasket, a micturated basket.


that basket really tied the bike together, man.
 
2012-07-31 10:23:34 AM  
Did they check for nose prints on the tricycle seat?
 
2012-07-31 10:29:51 AM  
Hey, boy - you got a purty mouth. Why'n'tcha come on over here...
 
2012-07-31 10:31:16 AM  

some_beer_drinker: probesport: A tisket a tasket, a micturated basket.

that basket really tied the bike together, man.


Nihilists.
 
2012-07-31 10:41:45 AM  
jumpingpolarbear.files.wordpress.com

I'll not pay this fine, it's unjust!
 
2012-07-31 10:48:18 AM  

what_now: "I'm not paying the $5,000 fine, that's outrageous," King said. "It has nothing to do with me."

Broward County Judge John "Jay" Hurley lowered his bond amount to $3,500.

In an exchange with Hurley, King maintained his innocence.

"I didn't break in, the door was open," King said.

"Clearly he doesn't know the elements to burglary," Hurley said in response.

This may be my favorite court room exchange ever.


This is full of win.

'I didn't steal the car. The keys were already in the ignition'
 
2012-07-31 10:58:30 AM  
Well, church usually keeps people in the closet. Just sayin..
 
2012-07-31 11:00:04 AM  
i.imgur.com
 
2012-07-31 05:16:18 PM  
I've been a proud heterosexual ever since I came out of the church closet...
 
2012-07-31 07:09:35 PM  
what the fark? that dude's pic looks like a pieced together composite they use to identify an unknown victim. creepy.
 
2012-07-31 11:55:12 PM  
"I didn't break in, the door was open," King said.
"Clearly he doesn't know the elements to burglary," Hurley said in response.


Apparently he does. It sounds more like trespassing than burgling. Correct me if I'm wrong, Farkers.
 
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