If you can read this, either the style sheet didn't load or you have an older browser that doesn't support style sheets. Try clearing your browser cache and refreshing the page.

(USA Today)   Parents can inflict emotional harm and not realize it, according to the Ric Romero Institute of Nothing is Ever Good Enough   (usatoday.com) divider line 52
    More: Obvious, American Academy in Berlin, emotional abuse, Montefiore Medical Center, American Academy of Pediatrics, adolescent psychiatry, Indiana University  
•       •       •

2766 clicks; posted to Main » on 31 Jul 2012 at 12:32 PM (2 years ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



52 Comments   (+0 »)
   
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest

Archived thread

First | « | 1 | 2 | » | Last | Show all
 
2012-07-31 11:23:08 AM  
This just in: spending nearly every day with someone for years and years on end may cause you to say some emotionally damaging things to each other.
 
2012-07-31 12:35:22 PM  
I wouldn't have to inflict anything if the little bastards did what I ask them to the first time.
 
2012-07-31 12:35:30 PM  

Lando Lincoln: This just in: spending nearly every day with someone for years and years on end may cause you to say some emotionally damaging things to each other.


Seems we're done here, you useless disappointments.
 
2012-07-31 12:36:02 PM  
Obvious tag's having an orgasm over this one
 
2012-07-31 12:36:05 PM  
Especially if dad is named Jerry Sandusky.
 
2012-07-31 12:37:19 PM  
the is old news ..
 
2012-07-31 12:39:00 PM  
they fark you up, your mum and dad
 
2012-07-31 12:39:38 PM  
you are a failure, so get over it and be successful in life you lil f*cking halfwit bastard.
 
2012-07-31 12:41:18 PM  
Excuse me a moment, I have to make a phone call
i87.photobucket.com
 
2012-07-31 12:41:32 PM  
No surprise, really. When I think back to the people I've known who were really (and often inexplicably) messed up it all became clear once I met one or both of their parents.
 
2012-07-31 12:42:44 PM  
But the beauty of it is that all that harm gets rectified when the respective parent(s) are on their death bed. Sure that means that the child is going to grow up and become a maladjusted adult but that's the seasoning that makes the human condition extra nice.

Now the question that's really going to boil your noodle is can a parent inflict emotional harm if the parent is non-existent? Take that and smoke it orphaned wild child living with wolves in Oregon!
 
2012-07-31 12:43:06 PM  
I'll even go so far as to agree with this premise.
However, perhaps it's time to re-assess whether "psychological harm" really means that much.
 
2012-07-31 12:43:13 PM  
The problem is not the parents who inadvertently do stupid things and mess with their kid's self-esteem. Children grow up, they realize that Mom and Dad are just people too, and sometimes they fark up. A normal, healthy reaction.

A worse problem is the parents who do all kinds of stupid things and harm their children, but who still think they're the greatest parents on earth. And the kids grow up believing that too--that their feelings of being farked up and worthless are entirely justified, not planted there by their abusive parents.

Then those people wonder why their children grow up and hate them, or end up in prison. Because they were TOTALLY a great parent!
 
2012-07-31 12:43:16 PM  

Jonny17: they fark you up, your mum and dad


Not nearly as much as we fark them up!

About 30% of my lifelong friends are now entering parenthood. Most are about 4years-ish in, some newer, some a bit longer.

These children are breaking them. Every day that passes they become more and more like husks of their previous selves. Time doesn't age you a tenth as much as 2 children will.

/But they love it, and are very fortunate
//we're just supposed to say that to make them feel better
 
2012-07-31 12:43:29 PM  
Whatever, subby. You were never good enough. Why can't you be more like your brother?

I can't even stand to look at you. Go sit in the corner where you belong.
 
2012-07-31 12:44:15 PM  
And it's not just what they do to kids directly. Kids will perpetuate the way parents treat each other, by letting it be done to them in "adulthood", in very insidious and hard to notice ways. Taking over the business, so to speak.
 
2012-07-31 12:44:30 PM  
 
2012-07-31 12:45:12 PM  
So, I should or should not keep calling my kids 'Dumbass'?
 
2012-07-31 12:46:19 PM  
I abuse my kids every week with this hateful language:

* Set the table
* Put the dirty dishes away
* Cut the grass
* Clean your room
 
2012-07-31 12:48:33 PM  

Lando Lincoln: This just in: spending nearly every day with someone for years and years on end may cause you to say some emotionally damaging things to each other.


Every time I complain, people post the "Welcome to Fark" pic. :(
 
2012-07-31 12:51:12 PM  

czei: I abuse my kids every week with this hateful language:

* Set the table
* Put the dirty dishes away
* Cut the grass
* Clean your room


You inhuman monster!
 
2012-07-31 01:06:52 PM  
Mrs_Fab and I have done a decent enough job for 19 years, and now we're in the backing-off-and-letting-her-do-her-shiat phase. She's a good kid, and I'm proud of her (for the most part).

My only advice to young dads:

1. The best thing you can ever do for your kids is to love their mother. Genuinely. All the time.

2. Never let them get away with lying to you. Ever.

3. Always try to act like the sort of person you want them to grow up to be.


If you can handle those three, you're 95% of the way there. Good luck.
 
2012-07-31 01:07:01 PM  

MurphyMurphy: Jonny17: they fark you up, your mum and dad

Not nearly as much as we fark them up!

About 30% of my lifelong friends are now entering parenthood. Most are about 4years-ish in, some newer, some a bit longer.

These children are breaking them. Every day that passes they become more and more like husks of their previous selves. Time doesn't age you a tenth as much as 2 children will.

/But they love it, and are very fortunate
//we're just supposed to say that to make them feel better


So you're saying "Get out as early as you can, And don't have any kids yourself"?
 
2012-07-31 01:08:29 PM  
Just so much more American child worshiping. I mean really, what is the harm in telling a kid "Billy, you aren't as stupid, clumsy and ugly as some of the kids around here, but you're damned close!"
 
2012-07-31 01:09:30 PM  
 
2012-07-31 01:11:49 PM  

Snarfangel: Lando Lincoln: This just in: spending nearly every day with someone for years and years on end may cause you to say some emotionally damaging things to each other.

Every time I complain, people post the "Welcome to Fark" pic. :(


i758.photobucket.comi758.photobucket.comi758.photobucket.com

/Welcome to Fark Thrice
 
2012-07-31 01:12:04 PM  
Im sure this will be the next rallying cry for libs. Next I wont be able to tell my kids "no" when they want to go to McDonalds
 
2012-07-31 01:12:47 PM  
I fully expect my kids to hate me when they're 20, and be completely over it when they're 30.
 
2012-07-31 01:39:11 PM  
"You'll get over it" doesn't seem to work for me. I grew up with a biatch of a mother, who would usually call me all sorts of names like bastard, asshole, and pig. And my dad? Even worse than her. The only reason why I made it out this far in life was because 1) Dad worked all the time and was rarely awake when I was, and 2) Mom died when I was 23 and she was 43. It's no surprise then that I am such a f*ckup nowadays. Thank FSM I don't have kids, nor do I have any desire for kids. I would just fark them up some more.

I suspect that Dad feels quilty nowadays for not spending more time with me and that he thought my Mom is such a loving, caring mother that he could not understand why I turned out the way I am now. I'll just wait until he is on his deathbed before I tell him everything about my upbringing. Then piss on his grave once he croaks.
 
2012-07-31 01:45:05 PM  

66dude: "You'll get over it" doesn't seem to work for me. I grew up with a biatch of a mother, who would usually call me all sorts of names like bastard, asshole, and pig. And my dad? Even worse than her. The only reason why I made it out this far in life was because 1) Dad worked all the time and was rarely awake when I was, and 2) Mom died when I was 23 and she was 43. It's no surprise then that I am such a f*ckup nowadays. Thank FSM I don't have kids, nor do I have any desire for kids. I would just fark them up some more.

I suspect that Dad feels quilty nowadays for not spending more time with me and that he thought my Mom is such a loving, caring mother that he could not understand why I turned out the way I am now. I'll just wait until he is on his deathbed before I tell him everything about my upbringing. Then piss on his grave once he croaks.


Yeah, be bitter and let your childhood abuse define you as an adult all the way up until your dad dies! That'll show...someone.
 
2012-07-31 01:56:35 PM  

Jonny17:
So you're saying "Get out as early as you can, And don't have any kids yourself"?


No, I'm saying precisely what I said.

You can read the words can't you?
 
2012-07-31 02:06:55 PM  
Back in the day when Reader's Digest was still a big thing, a similar article was within its pages. I read it and, precocious little genius that I was, recognized my mother did the same things that were discussed. I showed her the article.

After the three hours of "discussion" I had with my mother that day, I learned my lesson and would never do that again.
 
2012-07-31 02:16:08 PM  

cryinoutloud: The problem is not the parents who inadvertently do stupid things and mess with their kid's self-esteem. Children grow up, they realize that Mom and Dad are just people too, and sometimes they fark up. A normal, healthy reaction.

A worse problem is the parents who do all kinds of stupid things and harm their children, but who still think they're the greatest parents on earth. And the kids grow up believing that too--that their feelings of being farked up and worthless are entirely justified, not planted there by their abusive parents.

Then those people wonder why their children grow up and hate them, or end up in prison. Because they were TOTALLY a great parent!


Bingo. My mom used do a little modeling before she had me. Every time I come home for a visit, it's always "Wow honey, you look...healthy!" and "Doesn't your school have a salad bar?" spoken with a critical eye on my waistline.

Meanwhile, my dad spent my formative years screaming and throwing things while I hid behind the couch. It wasn't his fault, it was the meds, but he scared the holy hell out of me.

Then they wonder aloud why their daughter has body issues, doesn't let people in her personal space, and has next to no interest in dating.

They are great parents and I love them, but there's some issues there.
 
2012-07-31 02:17:22 PM  

MurphyMurphy: Jonny17:
So you're saying "Get out as early as you can, And don't have any kids yourself"?

No, I'm saying precisely what I said.

You can read the words can't you?


let me explain.
 
2012-07-31 02:17:38 PM  
Parents can inflict emotional harm and not realize it

Exhibit A: Asia.
 
2012-07-31 02:41:04 PM  
Anyone who sees a child being berated should, at least, step in to "break the moment."

This will end badly.
 
2012-07-31 02:43:15 PM  
It's really simple. GET OVER YOURSELF. Everyone suffered some kind of abuse. Everyone. The definition is so loose these days. Anyway. Get some therapy and move on.
/late for my therapy appointment
 
2012-07-31 02:45:08 PM  

Bondith: Parents can inflict emotional harm and not realize it

Exhibit A: Asia.


You mean the horrible progressive-pop band from the 80s? Because inflicting that shiat on a defenseless child would be hideously abusive, indeed.

/even if it was... in the heat of the moment
//yeeeaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhhhh
 
2012-07-31 03:20:29 PM  
I often thought a tape recording would've saved me from a lot of exhaustion over the years.

"Why?" asked one little cuss or another.

"Because I'm the meanest mom in the universe, that's why."
 
2012-07-31 03:36:03 PM  
I'm surprised by how many people in this thread seem to think getting emotionally abused by your parents is a normal part of life for everyone. My parents never called me stupid or worthless--it was the kids at school who did that. If my parents had done it too, I probably wouldn't have turned out all right at all. My parents have flaws but they were never abusive in any way. When I think about it, I am actually kind of amazed with the restraint my dad was able to show with me even in instances where I know that his first instinct would probably have been to haul off and hit me (we butt heads a lot and I can be pretty difficult). I guess he'd had enough lashings as a kid and he didn't want to pass that particular family tradition on. Thanks, Dad.

I did have a friend in high school with a seriously manipulative and abusive mother. She never hit my friend, but she used emotional blackmail and demeaning language like a champ. She's the first person I ever really felt true, burning hatred toward. They seem to get along better these days, but I can't forget how awful she was then.
 
2012-07-31 04:04:34 PM  
Parents inflict emotional harm on us because they love us. Why don't you visit them more often? You don't live far away just come over for dinner one night and it'll be nice. And by the way, why don't you cut your hair and dress better so you won't be so ugly and unemployable and girlfriend-less anymore? Why don't you respond instead of standing there quiet like an idiot? Where are you going? She just wants to talk to you, why can't you just talk she's your mother and she loves you?
 
2012-07-31 04:12:07 PM  
to this whole thread:

s10.postimage.org
 
2012-07-31 06:04:45 PM  
FTFA: Anyone who sees a child being berated should, at least, step in to "break the moment."

Great. I finally made it through the gantlet of well-meaning old ladies telling me to stop shaking my baby every time I bounce him on my knee. Now I can look forward to "stop emotionally abusing your child" if I scold him for being a brat. Or ignore him-- because that can be abuse too.
 
2012-07-31 06:54:48 PM  

Gdalescrboz: Im sure this will be the next rallying cry for libs. Next I wont be able to tell my kids "no" when they want to go to McDonalds


I thought the next rallying cry for "the libs" was to ban McDonalds. Now I don't know which direction to crap my pants in.
 
2012-07-31 07:03:56 PM  
know what? you may have had it bad but others had it worse. now quit being a whiny self-pity machine and get some help. there are counselors, therapists and psychiatrists all across the land. drop a dime, make a appointment and get started on the road to recovery. you don't have to live in the shadow of your childhood. you don't have to carry the hurt all your life.

and remember: there are more people that love you than you will ever know. because you are a good person, and you deserve it.
 
2012-07-31 07:14:42 PM  

Mr_Fabulous: 2. Never let them get away with lying to you. Ever.


Is that to teach them about hypocrisy or to train them a better liar than you are lie detector? Or are you from some society where lying isn't a vital part of normal social interactions?
 
2012-07-31 08:44:11 PM  
During my teen years, my Dad acted like he was spiting me for being young. I think it had something to do with his relationship with his father, and missed opportunities when he was my age. No excuse for him taking that out on me, you're supposed to be the better man. When he wasn't doing that he would purposefully make things difficult for me, to "build character". I was a loser in H.S. because of it. Other kids would get handmedown sedans from their parents (generally 3-series BMWs) whereas I had to walk until I could afford a pos senior year. I didn't have a date or anything through H.S., didn't even have interests or anything to talk about since he tried to keep me naive too (catholic upbringing). He'd also call me names, call me useless, tell me my friends weren't actually friends (tried to single me out and make me feel alone), took me out of school when my social life was just getting going (next year when I went back all my friends had moved to different schools because of a restructuring of the district). He never hit me but he came damn close several times, scared me so bad I actually pissed my pants once. He'd do just about everything you could do within the law to degrade his child and crush his ego.

Since I went off to college he's treated me like I'm some sort of delinquent. When I moved back in with him he was paranoid delusional and believed I was going to rob him, so he called the cops on me. He was 1 step away from completely farking over my future, and all because he was crazy and trying to prove a point. Figured out later that he treated me like that because he thought I was who he was at that age.

Now he acts like my sole purpose for existing is providing him grandkids. He has cut just about everyone else out of his life because of anger and hate, so he's always alone, and expects me to create a little family for him to dote on. He's gone so far as to say that I should've knocked up some girl because apparently "love" is more important than anything. Baby boomer bullshiat. Never gave me shiat, never gave me any tools to be successful, and then he thinks its MY fault when I have horrible relations with women.

He has made me hate family and family life more than anything. I never want kids, don't want to deal with the bullshiat of raising them and I hate to think I'd treat them the same as he did me. Last time I talked to him, I told him that if he wanted grandkids he better produce a daughter. He basically disowned me, which doesn't mean anything since he doesn't have shiat. I'd probably have to pay for his casket when he dies, except if given the choice I'd let him have a pauper's grave. I'd find it later just to piss on it.
 
2012-07-31 08:46:24 PM  
Yes I am a certified nutcase, bipolar bear with a side order of OCD. But I have remained functioning and employed my whole life.

Rather than think my parents are the cause of my mental illness, I instead think they are the cause of my functionality and employability despite my illness.

And I love them unreservedly.
 
2012-07-31 09:59:55 PM  
Well, yeah, not wanting anything to do with your offspring until they're old enough to go to the bar with you can have that effect.
 
2012-08-01 02:39:31 AM  

barefoot in the head: And it's not just what they do to kids directly. Kids will perpetuate the way parents treat each other, by letting it be done to them in "adulthood", in very insidious and hard to notice ways. Taking over the business, so to speak.


That "business" is called America and it's made us the greatest country in the world. I hope someone ties you to a tree and cuts off your arms and legs, you rotten humanist liberal pussy.

/no srsly tho, you make a great point.
//one I'm sure would make a lot of people react as I pretended to.
 
Displayed 50 of 52 comments

First | « | 1 | 2 | » | Last | Show all

View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest


This thread is archived, and closed to new comments.

Continue Farking
Submit a Link »






Report