If you can read this, either the style sheet didn't load or you have an older browser that doesn't support style sheets. Try clearing your browser cache and refreshing the page.

(POGO)   Tennessee's Y-12 uranium storage facility is supposed to be secure against up to a dozen heavily armed terrorists with insider security knowledge, yet is vulnerable to an 82-year-old nun   (pogoblog.typepad.com) divider line 62
    More: Sad, uranium  
•       •       •

11052 clicks; posted to Main » on 31 Jul 2012 at 12:16 PM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



62 Comments   (+0 »)
   
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest

Archived thread

First | « | 1 | 2 | » | Last | Show all
 
2012-07-31 12:27:21 AM
They're positively glowing with triumph.
 
2012-07-31 12:33:57 AM
To be fair to the facility - they're stuck a crappy applicant pool - they're in Tennessee.
 
2012-07-31 12:42:44 AM
This facility is "secured" by the same company as the Olympics in London.

Glad I'm not over there right now.
 
2012-07-31 12:52:25 AM
Stockton recommended that the department's independent Office of Health, Safety, and Security also investigate "what went so terribly wrong" at Y-12.

...

The guard force is provided by G4S Secure Solutions (formerly known as the Wackenhut Corp.)




Dear Mr. Stockton:

As a government employee with 18 years of management and evaluation experience, I offer my services as an evaluator of "what went so horribly wrong" at the Y-12 facility. Because this is such a highly sensitive matter, and so important to national security, I am willing to offer a discount. Consulting fees will be charged off at the rate of $250.00 per hour with a minimum contract of 1,000 hours.

I await your confirmation.

Sincerely,

Benevolent Misanthrope
 
2012-07-31 12:53:48 AM
They're lucky it wasn't an exploding penguin
 
2012-07-31 01:03:16 AM
So "After cutting through three fences surrounding the facility, the activists 'posted a banner on one of the buildings and poured human blood on the premises,'" and getting captured, this is supposed to mean the site is vulnerable? Wake me up when they get anywhere near something actually dangerous.
 
2012-07-31 05:59:11 AM
Well that's interesting.
 
2012-07-31 10:07:54 AM

m3000: So "After cutting through three fences surrounding the facility, the activists 'posted a banner on one of the buildings and poured human blood on the premises,'" and getting captured, this is supposed to mean the site is vulnerable? Wake me up when they get anywhere near something actually dangerous.


Hey, someone could have slipped on that human blood and seriously injured themselves; a torn ligament, fractured tailbone, bruised leg. The paperwork would have been crippling.
 
2012-07-31 10:13:24 AM
What's more, security guards at Y-12 have a history of literally sleeping on the job, as the News Sentinel reported in 2008 and 2012.

The guard force is provided by G4S Secure Solutions (formerly known as the Wackenhut Corp.), the self-proclaimed largest security contractor in the world. As the security provider of the 2012 Olympic Games in London, G4S made headlines earlier this summer when it failed to provide the promised number of security guards for the event, something the company agreed was "a humiliating shambles," the BBC reported.


Typical lib hit piece. Privatization never fails.
 
2012-07-31 10:48:45 AM

MaudlinMutantMollusk: They're lucky it wasn't an exploding penguin


[Funny!]
 
2012-07-31 11:05:11 AM
What's black and white and glowing green and sits in a jail cell?
 
2012-07-31 11:15:16 AM
After cutting through three fences surrounding the facility, the activists "posted a banner on one of the buildings and poured human blood on the premises,"

The police may want to consider the possibility of additional criminal activity.
 
2012-07-31 11:16:31 AM

Lionel Mandrake: After cutting through three fences surrounding the facility, the activists "posted a banner on one of the buildings and poured human blood on the premises,"

The police may want to consider the possibility of additional criminal activity.


To be fair, it was still water when she poured it.
 
2012-07-31 11:17:19 AM

Diogenes: Lionel Mandrake: After cutting through three fences surrounding the facility, the activists "posted a banner on one of the buildings and poured human blood on the premises,"

The police may want to consider the possibility of additional criminal activity.

To be fair, it was still water when she poured it.


Dammit! I mixed my Bible magic. I should have said wine.
 
2012-07-31 11:36:49 AM

Diogenes: Diogenes: Lionel Mandrake: After cutting through three fences surrounding the facility, the activists "posted a banner on one of the buildings and poured human blood on the premises,"

The police may want to consider the possibility of additional criminal activity.

To be fair, it was still water when she poured it.

Dammit! I mixed my Bible magic. I should have said wine.


Nile river water. Always with de Nile.
 
ZAZ [TotalFark]
2012-07-31 11:44:00 AM
Reminds me of the flight of Mathias Rust. Great PR, military applications less clear.
 
2012-07-31 12:20:16 PM
Sure, blame the nun.

Christ, I could go for a beer!
www.ecoefficientappliances.com
Saints be praised!
 
2012-07-31 12:21:10 PM

m3000: So "After cutting through three fences surrounding the facility, the activists 'posted a banner on one of the buildings and poured human blood on the premises,'" and getting captured, this is supposed to mean the site is vulnerable? Wake me up when they get anywhere near something actually dangerous.


if 80 year old lady can get through 3 fences and get inside the facility for long enough to hang banners it's pretty embarrassing.
 
2012-07-31 12:23:40 PM
Should they be prosecuted for trespass, or given a pass for demonstrating that the site has huge security issues.

I think I am leaning towards giving them a pass, as it seems that they are more whistle blowers than criminals.
 
2012-07-31 12:24:47 PM
EVERYTHING is vulnerable to an 82 year old nun
 
2012-07-31 12:26:49 PM
Hopefully they'll allow the octogenarian nun to take her Bible and spread the good word to them Godless Mooslims at Guantanamo Bay.
 
2012-07-31 12:28:54 PM

Benevolent Misanthrope: Stockton recommended that the department's independent Office of Health, Safety, and Security also investigate "what went so terribly wrong" at Y-12.

...

The guard force is provided by G4S Secure Solutions (formerly known as the Wackenhut Corp.)



Dear Mr. Stockton:

As a government employee with 18 years of management and evaluation experience, I offer my services as an evaluator of "what went so horribly wrong" at the Y-12 facility. Because this is such a highly sensitive matter, and so important to national security, I am willing to offer a discount. Consulting fees will be charged off at the rate of $250.00 per hour with a minimum contract of 1,000 hours.

I await your confirmation.

Sincerely,

Benevolent Misanthrope


Dear Mr. Stockton:

I will beat any competitor's bid for this contract by 10% and will also demonstrate what went wrong.

Sincerely,
stiletto_the_wise
 
2012-07-31 12:32:09 PM

Crewmannumber6: EVERYTHING is vulnerable to an 82 year old nun


They can fly. It's hard to secure against that.
 
2012-07-31 12:32:25 PM
They were on a "mission from gad."

40odd.files.wordpress.com
 
2012-07-31 12:33:45 PM
I read that as K-12 and was very confused
 
2012-07-31 12:34:55 PM
Why do we have weapons grade uranium that is not secured by Marines?

And this is scary, FTA: "Several years later, department security exercises revealed that intruders inside the facility's fences could enter one of the uranium storage building in about 45 seconds, POGO reported."

m3000: So "After cutting through three fences surrounding the facility, the activists 'posted a banner on one of the buildings and poured human blood on the premises,'" and getting captured, this is supposed to mean the site is vulnerable? Wake me up when they get anywhere near something actually dangerous.

It sounds like they had way more than the 45 seconds it would have taken to get to the uranium. Good thing they didn't actually want to do that...
 
2012-07-31 12:35:53 PM
RexTalionis


To be fair to the facility - they're stuck a crappy applicant pool - they're in Tennessee.

You know nothing of the folks from Tennessee.
I'll take someone from Tennessee over someone from any other state.

\except possibly Texas
 
2012-07-31 12:37:53 PM

stiletto_the_wise: Benevolent Misanthrope: Stockton recommended that the department's independent Office of Health, Safety, and Security also investigate "what went so terribly wrong" at Y-12.

...

The guard force is provided by G4S Secure Solutions (formerly known as the Wackenhut Corp.)



Dear Mr. Stockton:

As a government employee with 18 years of management and evaluation experience, I offer my services as an evaluator of "what went so horribly wrong" at the Y-12 facility. Because this is such a highly sensitive matter, and so important to national security, I am willing to offer a discount. Consulting fees will be charged off at the rate of $250.00 per hour with a minimum contract of 1,000 hours.

I await your confirmation.

Sincerely,

Benevolent Misanthrope

Dear Mr. Stockton:

I will beat any competitor's bid for this contract by 10% and will also demonstrate what went wrong.

Sincerely,
stiletto_the_wise


I'll underbid by 40%, won't deliver anything, and will require five or more contract mods of currently indeterminate length or dollar value to provide a halfass analysis eighteen months past the original POP end date.

/sees this shiat every day
//gov't SETA contractor
 
2012-07-31 12:41:18 PM
Where does a nun go to get a big bottle of human blood, anyway?
 
2012-07-31 12:43:15 PM

Kentucky Fried Children: stiletto_the_wise: Benevolent Misanthrope: Stockton recommended that the department's independent Office of Health, Safety, and Security also investigate "what went so terribly wrong" at Y-12.

...

The guard force is provided by G4S Secure Solutions (formerly known as the Wackenhut Corp.)



Dear Mr. Stockton:

As a government employee with 18 years of management and evaluation experience, I offer my services as an evaluator of "what went so horribly wrong" at the Y-12 facility. Because this is such a highly sensitive matter, and so important to national security, I am willing to offer a discount. Consulting fees will be charged off at the rate of $250.00 per hour with a minimum contract of 1,000 hours.

I await your confirmation.

Sincerely,

Benevolent Misanthrope

Dear Mr. Stockton:

I will beat any competitor's bid for this contract by 10% and will also demonstrate what went wrong.

Sincerely,
stiletto_the_wise

I'll underbid by 40%, won't deliver anything, and will require five or more contract mods of currently indeterminate length or dollar value to provide a halfass analysis eighteen months past the original POP end date.

/sees this shiat every day
//gov't SETA contractor



My contracting company is a Federally-recognized Minority-owned Small Business. We'll take the contract and sub it out to someone else for pennies.
 
2012-07-31 12:44:47 PM
What is she protesting exactly? Doesn't want the storage facility "in her backyard?" If that's the case, what are we supposed to do with all that nuclear material?
 
2012-07-31 12:45:59 PM

stiletto_the_wise: Kentucky Fried Children: stiletto_the_wise: Benevolent Misanthrope: Stockton recommended that the department's independent Office of Health, Safety, and Security also investigate "what went so terribly wrong" at Y-12.

...

The guard force is provided by G4S Secure Solutions (formerly known as the Wackenhut Corp.)



Dear Mr. Stockton:

As a government employee with 18 years of management and evaluation experience, I offer my services as an evaluator of "what went so horribly wrong" at the Y-12 facility. Because this is such a highly sensitive matter, and so important to national security, I am willing to offer a discount. Consulting fees will be charged off at the rate of $250.00 per hour with a minimum contract of 1,000 hours.

I await your confirmation.

Sincerely,

Benevolent Misanthrope

Dear Mr. Stockton:

I will beat any competitor's bid for this contract by 10% and will also demonstrate what went wrong.

Sincerely,
stiletto_the_wise

I'll underbid by 40%, won't deliver anything, and will require five or more contract mods of currently indeterminate length or dollar value to provide a halfass analysis eighteen months past the original POP end date.

/sees this shiat every day
//gov't SETA contractor


My contracting company is a Federally-recognized Minority-owned Small Business. We'll take the contract and sub it out to someone else for pennies.


Sold!
 
2012-07-31 12:47:17 PM
Whoa whoa, they said it was terrorist proof not penguin proof. Big difference there.
 
2012-07-31 12:52:22 PM

Benevolent Misanthrope: Stockton recommended that the department's independent Office of Health, Safety, and Security also investigate "what went so terribly wrong" at Y-12.

...

The guard force is provided by G4S Secure Solutions (formerly known as the Wackenhut Corp.)



Dear Mr. Stockton:

As a government employee with 18 years of management and evaluation experience, I offer my services as an evaluator of "what went so horribly wrong" at the Y-12 facility. Because this is such a highly sensitive matter, and so important to national security, I am willing to offer a discount. Consulting fees will be charged off at the rate of $250.00 per hour with a minimum contract of 1,000 hours.

I await your confirmation.

Sincerely,

Benevolent Misanthrope


Dear Mr. Misanthrope,

We are required to pay "prevailing wages," so I suggest that you re-submit your bid with an hourly fee of $250,000.
 
2012-07-31 12:52:47 PM
People still protest nukes?
 
2012-07-31 12:54:21 PM

stiletto_the_wise: Kentucky Fried Children: stiletto_the_wise: Benevolent Misanthrope: Stockton recommended that the department's independent Office of Health, Safety, and Security also investigate "what went so terribly wrong" at Y-12.

...

The guard force is provided by G4S Secure Solutions (formerly known as the Wackenhut Corp.)



Dear Mr. Stockton:

As a government employee with 18 years of management and evaluation experience, I offer my services as an evaluator of "what went so horribly wrong" at the Y-12 facility. Because this is such a highly sensitive matter, and so important to national security, I am willing to offer a discount. Consulting fees will be charged off at the rate of $250.00 per hour with a minimum contract of 1,000 hours.

I await your confirmation.

Sincerely,

Benevolent Misanthrope

Dear Mr. Stockton:

I will beat any competitor's bid for this contract by 10% and will also demonstrate what went wrong.

Sincerely,
stiletto_the_wise

I'll underbid by 40%, won't deliver anything, and will require five or more contract mods of currently indeterminate length or dollar value to provide a halfass analysis eighteen months past the original POP end date.

/sees this shiat every day
//gov't SETA contractor


My contracting company is a Federally-recognized Minority-owned Small Business. We'll take the contract and sub it out to someone else for pennies.



Goddammitsomuch

I hate "minority/female-owned small businesses".

Minorities and women got farked over so now the moment they are given better footing they turn around and fark over others.
 
2012-07-31 01:02:20 PM
"The Department of Energy has repeatedly claimed that security at the site, which houses 300 to 400 metric tons of bomb-grade uranium, is robust enough to defend against more than a dozen heavily-armed terrorists with inside knowledge of security procedures" Peter Stockton, a nuclear security expert at the Project On Government Oversight (POGO), ironically observed.

Wait. 300-400 TONS of weapons grade uranium? That number seems a bit high.
 
2012-07-31 01:06:19 PM
I found a picture of the nun in question.

img170.imageshack.us
We will fight them on the beaches! We will fight them on the glaciers!
 
2012-07-31 01:12:54 PM

HellRaisingHoosier: stiletto_the_wise: Kentucky Fried Children: stiletto_the_wise: Benevolent Misanthrope: Stockton recommended that the department's independent Office of Health, Safety, and Security also investigate "what went so terribly wrong" at Y-12.

...

The guard force is provided by G4S Secure Solutions (formerly known as the Wackenhut Corp.)



Dear Mr. Stockton:

As a government employee with 18 years of management and evaluation experience, I offer my services as an evaluator of "what went so horribly wrong" at the Y-12 facility. Because this is such a highly sensitive matter, and so important to national security, I am willing to offer a discount. Consulting fees will be charged off at the rate of $250.00 per hour with a minimum contract of 1,000 hours.

I await your confirmation.

Sincerely,

Benevolent Misanthrope

Dear Mr. Stockton:

I will beat any competitor's bid for this contract by 10% and will also demonstrate what went wrong.

Sincerely,
stiletto_the_wise

I'll underbid by 40%, won't deliver anything, and will require five or more contract mods of currently indeterminate length or dollar value to provide a halfass analysis eighteen months past the original POP end date.

/sees this shiat every day
//gov't SETA contractor


My contracting company is a Federally-recognized Minority-owned Small Business. We'll take the contract and sub it out to someone else for pennies.



Goddammitsomuch I hate "minority/female-owned small businesses".

Minorities and women got farked over so now the moment they are given better footing they turn around and fark over others.


I feel like I deal with shenanigans and/or shady dealings from tribally-owned service disabled veteran women minority 8(A) NAICS corporations every day, so I'm getting a kick...
 
2012-07-31 01:20:56 PM
Well, I hope your protest was worth going to jail for the rest of your life.
 
2012-07-31 01:22:26 PM

Satanic_Hamster: "The Department of Energy has repeatedly claimed that security at the site, which houses 300 to 400 metric tons of bomb-grade uranium, is robust enough to defend against more than a dozen heavily-armed terrorists with inside knowledge of security procedures" Peter Stockton, a nuclear security expert at the Project On Government Oversight (POGO), ironically observed.

Wait. 300-400 TONS of weapons grade uranium? That number seems a bit high.


Well, that stuff IS really heavy, right?
 
2012-07-31 01:24:04 PM

SN1987a goes boom: Well, I hope your protest was worth going to jail for the rest of your life.


Maybe that was their retirement plan.
 
2012-07-31 01:35:37 PM

stiletto_the_wise: Kentucky Fried Children: stiletto_the_wise: Benevolent Misanthrope: Stockton recommended that the department's independent Office of Health, Safety, and Security also investigate "what went so terribly wrong" at Y-12.

...

The guard force is provided by G4S Secure Solutions (formerly known as the Wackenhut Corp.)



Dear Mr. Stockton:

As a government employee with 18 years of management and evaluation experience, I offer my services as an evaluator of "what went so horribly wrong" at the Y-12 facility. Because this is such a highly sensitive matter, and so important to national security, I am willing to offer a discount. Consulting fees will be charged off at the rate of $250.00 per hour with a minimum contract of 1,000 hours.

I await your confirmation.

Sincerely,

Benevolent Misanthrope

Dear Mr. Stockton:

I will beat any competitor's bid for this contract by 10% and will also demonstrate what went wrong.

Sincerely,
stiletto_the_wise

I'll underbid by 40%, won't deliver anything, and will require five or more contract mods of currently indeterminate length or dollar value to provide a halfass analysis eighteen months past the original POP end date.

/sees this shiat every day
//gov't SETA contractor


My contracting company is a Federally-recognized Minority-owned Small Business. We'll take the contract and sub it out to someone else for pennies.


75 cents and a look at your wife's knickers.

Final offer.
 
2012-07-31 01:43:42 PM
But what if they send 13 terrorists? Then they're screwed.
 
2012-07-31 01:52:21 PM
This is a non-story. A penguin got into the front lawn. "Human blood"? I bet goat's blood.
 
2012-07-31 01:52:37 PM
Hundreds of tons of depleted Uranium. Good for projectiles and, more importantly, use as fuel in Integral Reactors (you know, the kind that shut down on their own if they overheat). Have sufficient depleted Uranium stores, along with the really hot stuff being stashed onsite at current LWR's across the country, to supply all electricity for U.S. for at least a thousand years.

We spent 20 billion perfecting the technology (Sodium Cooled unit is currently being dismantled at Idaho National Labs after a 30 yr. run) and then shut the project down three years short of completion: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Integral_Fast_Reactor

Greenies are probably being funded by coal/natural gas interests, under the table
 
2012-07-31 02:37:26 PM

JeffreyScott: Should they be prosecuted for trespass, or given a pass for demonstrating that the site has huge security issues.

I think I am leaning towards giving them a pass, as it seems that they are more whistle blowers than criminals.


Haven't you heard. With the Obama administration and current batch of congress critters there are no whistle blowers. Only traitors.

 
2012-07-31 02:48:07 PM

ladyfortuna: Satanic_Hamster: "The Department of Energy has repeatedly claimed that security at the site, which houses 300 to 400 metric tons of bomb-grade uranium, is robust enough to defend against more than a dozen heavily-armed terrorists with inside knowledge of security procedures" Peter Stockton, a nuclear security expert at the Project On Government Oversight (POGO), ironically observed.

Wait. 300-400 TONS of weapons grade uranium? That number seems a bit high.

Well, that stuff IS really heavy, right?


Metric ton is only a thousand pounds, right? RIGHT?
/joke will fail if it actually is. Still hungover from DEFCON20. Irony? No.
 
2012-07-31 03:44:37 PM

Diogenes: Lionel Mandrake: After cutting through three fences surrounding the facility, the activists "posted a banner on one of the buildings and poured human blood on the premises,"

The police may want to consider the possibility of additional criminal activity.

To be fair, it was still water when she poured it.


Bwahahaha!!!
 
2012-07-31 05:06:00 PM
This is hilarious. Y12 makes a huge deal of how super-secure they are, being the place where we store all of the uranium from the Libyan program. Secure storage is their new thing, now that the whole enriching nuclear fuel thing is over at that site. You're supposed to get shot if you cross the security fence.
 
Displayed 50 of 62 comments

First | « | 1 | 2 | » | Last | Show all

View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest


This thread is closed to new comments.

Continue Farking
Submit a Link »






Report