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(Time)   News: The apes have risen. Cool: And they're pretty freaking nice   (newsfeed.time.com ) divider line
    More: Interesting, poachers, gorillas, apes  
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22884 clicks; posted to Main » on 30 Jul 2012 at 12:28 AM (4 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



76 Comments     (+0 »)
 
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2012-07-30 12:30:56 AM  
Michael Crichton saw this coming ages ago.
 
2012-07-30 12:30:57 AM  
They're so well spoken. So clean.
 
2012-07-30 12:33:20 AM  
i291.photobucket.com
 
2012-07-30 12:33:27 AM  
1.bp.blogspot.com
 
2012-07-30 12:33:59 AM  
I think the 'field staff' just taught them to avoid and dismantle these traps.
 
2012-07-30 12:35:10 AM  
More recruits for Caesar.
 
2012-07-30 12:35:12 AM  
Ape shall not kill ape. The black dude goes in the museum.
 
2012-07-30 12:37:03 AM  
It's kind of arrogant for us to assume that other species don't have high intelligence and similar emotions to ourselves. After all, we're just another type of animal. It would be more surprising to find that humans were the only ones that experience empathy and love.

It's also a bit racist. The thread below about the 8 women stabbing the elderly man shows how prevalent racism still is.
 
2012-07-30 12:38:16 AM  
And decades of research shows that apes have better memories than college students

*insert obligatory weed joke here*
 
2012-07-30 12:42:50 AM  
scientists have found that chimps who throw their feces often and accurately tend to be the smartest and best communicators in their group.

Much like our modern business culture.
 
2012-07-30 12:43:47 AM  
It's a travesty that we aren't treating other high apes more humanely. We can barely treat each other civilly though, so there's that.
 
2012-07-30 12:44:16 AM  
how do we teach them to set traps that'll kill and maim poachers?
 
2012-07-30 12:44:25 AM  

Tsar_Bomba1: [1.bp.blogspot.com image 700x525]


wat
 
2012-07-30 12:44:31 AM  
images.wikia.com

He can destroy snares! He can destroy snares!
He can destroy snares! He can destroy snares!
 
2012-07-30 12:48:07 AM  

AverageAmericanGuy: It's kind of arrogant for us to assume that other species don't have high intelligence and similar emotions to ourselves. After all, we're just another type of animal. It would be more surprising to find that humans were the only ones that experience empathy and love.

It's also a bit racist. The thread below about the 8 women stabbing the elderly man shows how prevalent racism still is.


What, and if it was an article about a bunch of drunk white girls with names like Dystyny and Starlene stabbing someone, you think people wouldn't be making comments about their names or likely socio-economic status?
 
2012-07-30 12:49:58 AM  
Since this already hit the internet two weeks ago I'm not sure which apes are rising faster. But as usual, Fark is left with the old banana peels. You're giving "ironic apathy" a bad name if you're two blocks behind the rest of the internet, Fark.
 
2012-07-30 12:53:33 AM  
Looks like something from the church of scientology

timenewsfeed.files.wordpress.com
 
2012-07-30 12:54:09 AM  
I've argued for the establishment of a gorilla colony here in North America. Chinese snake jokes aside, we might as well take advantage of global warming set something up for them in the Appalachians and Pacific Northwest.

One day maybe, gorillas in the snow.
 
2012-07-30 12:54:43 AM  

Flogster: scientists have found that chimps who throw their feces often and accurately tend to be the smartest and best communicators in their group.

Much like our modern business culture.


Not to mention FARK.....

/I keed
//Well, not really.
 
2012-07-30 01:02:31 AM  
 
2012-07-30 01:12:26 AM  
It's not like poachers are all that smart to start with.
 
2012-07-30 01:30:08 AM  

AverageAmericanGuy: It's kind of arrogant for us to assume that other species don't have high intelligence and similar emotions to ourselves. After all, we're just another type of animal. It would be more surprising to find that humans were the only ones that experience empathy and love.

It's also a bit racist.


All I'm saying is that their life was better in the old days.
Hey, it's cool they have freedom and all, but is it really worth it when a young chimp can't cross the jungle without hitting a snare?
These chimps don't even know their fathers.
 
2012-07-30 01:31:34 AM  

Ivo Shandor: Please do not taunt the AK-47 ape.


Oh shiat... !! hehe
 
2012-07-30 01:41:34 AM  
 
2012-07-30 01:47:54 AM  
But where is the story of the robot who strives to achieve ape emotion?
 
2012-07-30 01:49:52 AM  
several young gorillas have been spotted destroying snares that are set to maim and kill wild apes.

Small correction - According to other articles on this subject, the snares are not set to catch apes. They are intended to catch game animals such as impala or jackels, and the odd ape is unfortunate by-catch. Kinda like dolphins killed by our tuna trawlers.
 
2012-07-30 01:56:31 AM  
I don't understand how this is a breakthrough. Every animal can watch humans do something and then mimic them.
 
2012-07-30 02:08:04 AM  

nickerj1: I don't understand how this is a breakthrough.


That's not all you don't understand, apparently.
 
2012-07-30 02:15:54 AM  

nickerj1: I don't understand how this is a breakthrough. Every animal can watch humans do something and then mimic them.


Yeah, that's why your dog shiats in the toilet.
 
2012-07-30 03:07:53 AM  
I, for one, welcome our new simian overlords.
 
2012-07-30 03:29:12 AM  
So the article is about gorillas but the journalist is too dumb to not realize that the picture is of a chimpanzee?

I don't think the apes are rising, we're just meeting them half-way.
 
2012-07-30 03:41:10 AM  
So when do we found the Institute for Uplift and begin to make our fellow apes (and possibly Cetaceans) full sapients?
 
2012-07-30 03:53:42 AM  
TFA: scientists have found that chimps who throw their feces often and accurately tend to be the smartest and best communicators in their group.

See! I've been trying to convince people for years that flinging poop is a sign of intelligence, but no one believes me!
 
2012-07-30 04:02:56 AM  
Not sure being nice is an adaptive trait in the the long run.
 
2012-07-30 04:03:25 AM  

Raw_fishFood: So when do we found the Institute for Uplift and begin to make our fellow apes (and possibly Cetaceans) full sapients?


Maybe once we start demonstrating that we're smart enough not to kill ourselves off with environmental pollution/nuclear missiles/weaponized viruses/"hold my beer and watch this, Cletus"-type behavior, we can aspire to telling other, better adapted species what to do.
 
2012-07-30 04:13:06 AM  

Coelacanth: I've argued for the establishment of a gorilla colony here in North America. Chinese snake jokes aside, we might as well take advantage of global warming set something up for them in the Appalachians and Pacific Northwest.

One day maybe, gorillas in the snow.


For some reason, your post made me wonder how well keas would do in North America.
 
2012-07-30 04:15:17 AM  

Uncle Tractor: Coelacanth: I've argued for the establishment of a gorilla colony here in North America. Chinese snake jokes aside, we might as well take advantage of global warming set something up for them in the Appalachians and Pacific Northwest.

One day maybe, gorillas in the snow.

For some reason, your post made me wonder how well keas would do in North America.


Hour or two. Three tops.
 
2012-07-30 04:16:47 AM  
Tsar_Bomba1:

Okay. Um. What's the background on that please?
 
2012-07-30 04:21:19 AM  

JustinCase: Tsar_Bomba1:

Okay. Um. What's the background on that please?


Some African country tried to convince people that they were training apes and monkeys for their army.
 
2012-07-30 04:23:52 AM  

Coelacanth: I've argued for the establishment of a gorilla colony here in North America. Chinese snake jokes aside, we might as well take advantage of global warming set something up for them in the Appalachians and Pacific Northwest.

One day maybe, gorillas in the snow.


I don't know if there's enough foraging for them to establish colonies in the Northwest. There's too many poachers in the Appalachians already.

/Skinner: Ah that's the beauty of the thing, come winter the gorillas will freeze to death.
 
2012-07-30 04:25:05 AM  

Coelacanth: JustinCase: Tsar_Bomba1:

Okay. Um. What's the background on that please?

Some African country tried to convince people that they were training apes and monkeys for their army.


Certainly *looks* convincing.

What about the video of chimpanzee and the automatic weapon, viral fake for next 'planet of the apes'?
 
2012-07-30 04:33:15 AM  

Coelacanth: I've argued for the establishment of a gorilla colony here in North America. Chinese snake jokes aside, we might as well take advantage of global warming set something up for them in the Appalachians and Pacific Northwest.

One day maybe, gorillas in the snow.


Fun fact: Elephants love snow. Link
 
2012-07-30 04:35:32 AM  

JustinCase: Coelacanth: JustinCase: Tsar_Bomba1:

Okay. Um. What's the background on that please?

Some African country tried to convince people that they were training apes and monkeys for their army.

Certainly *looks* convincing.

What about the video of chimpanzee and the automatic weapon, viral fake for next 'planet of the apes'?


I'm pretty sure it was viral marketing for the most recent planet of the apes that came out last year.
 
2012-07-30 05:44:14 AM  
Anybody know what monkey meat tastes like? Seems it would be a bit gamey.
 
2012-07-30 06:11:23 AM  

LordOfThePings: [images.wikia.com image 307x224]

He can destroy snares! He can destroy snares!
He can destroy snares! He can destroy snares!


i can SIIIIIIIIIIIING!!
 
2012-07-30 08:09:59 AM  
images.tribe.net

Just make sure you don't taunt them when they start to rise up.
 
2012-07-30 08:13:26 AM  
I hate every ape I see, from chimpan-A to chimpanzee.
 
2012-07-30 08:15:05 AM  
I am more than okay with this.
 
2012-07-30 08:49:29 AM  
TFA mentions prolific poo-flinging chimps as communicators...so they do social networking, too?

How about that...
 
2012-07-30 08:55:32 AM  
www.mindhuestudio.com

Feeling lucky, punk?
 
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