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(Philly.com)   Small volunteer fire department buys $1 million terror fighting super boat using Homeland Security funds. What could possibly go right?   (philly.com) divider line 71
    More: Fail, Homeland Security, funds, volunteer firefighters, Bensalem, Delaware River, storm drain, boats, San Diego Port Police  
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5603 clicks; posted to Politics » on 29 Jul 2012 at 4:51 PM (2 years ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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ZAZ [TotalFark]
2012-07-29 02:53:42 PM
Using homeland security funds plus more local money than they had:

Union's 2009 grant application - called an "investment justification" - sought $787,950 in federal funds for the Firestorm. Per the rules, the volunteers would pay the remaining $262,150. Union survives on $250,000 a year in state and township taxes. So after depleting its savings to buy the boat, the company needed a $94,000 loan to stay afloat.
 
2012-07-29 02:57:26 PM
When people talk about "government waste" - stories like this are what floats around the back of their head.
 
2012-07-29 03:05:16 PM
They say there are two great moments in a boat owners life. When the government misappropriates funds to give a local volunteer fire department an expensive boat they don't need nor can handle, and when the government seizes it to give to a more deserving group.
 
2012-07-29 03:33:17 PM

Lsherm: floats


I see what you did there.
 
2012-07-29 03:54:10 PM
Does that thing have James Bond style torpedoes and machine guns?

/All I see is a big farking Las Vegas fountain. What a waste of money.
 
2012-07-29 04:20:21 PM
At first, I thought four long pages were too much for this story. But after reading all them I see there's plenty of fail to fill them.
 
2012-07-29 04:38:15 PM

Skywolf Philosopher: Does that thing have James Bond style torpedoes and machine guns?

/All I see is a big farking Las Vegas fountain. What a waste of money.


The fountain is the BEST PART. People LOVE the fountain.
 
2012-07-29 04:54:53 PM

Lsherm: When people talk about "government waste" - stories like this are what floats around the back of their head.


Military and law enforcement is always the source of this shiat.

So, of course, they best way to address "government waste" is to cut everything else and throw more money at military and law enforcement.
 
2012-07-29 04:58:15 PM
Bensalem locals talk endlessly about the imposing 40-foot, 25,000-pound "Bear on the Delaware" that has been prowling all year but has yet to fight a fire or sniff out a bomb.

Bin Laden is dead.

Even when he was alive the chances of AQ taking on America again by setting stuff on fire within a certain yardage along a specific part of the Delaware River was already pretty slim.

Wasting resources is wasteful.
 
2012-07-29 04:58:31 PM

A Dark Evil Omen: Lsherm: When people talk about "government waste" - stories like this are what floats around the back of their head.

Military and law enforcement is always the source of this shiat.


Except when it isn't. Like in TFA.
 
2012-07-29 05:02:07 PM

A Dark Evil Omen: Lsherm: When people talk about "government waste" - stories like this are what floats around the back of their head.

Military and law enforcement is always the source of this shiat.

So, of course, they best way to address "government waste" is to cut everything else and throw more money at military and law enforcement.


It's a fire department, genuis. And they're also to blame for alot of this stuff. Police and fire are untouchable in the funding world. Public Works is a distant third when it comes to allocation priority.


Marcus Aurelius: Skywolf Philosopher: Does that thing have James Bond style torpedoes and machine guns?

/All I see is a big farking Las Vegas fountain. What a waste of money.

The fountain is the BEST PART. People LOVE the fountain.


Yeah, that's pretty-much what the Chief said:

Jerri was on board when the firefighters took their "Bear" to two Fourth of July fireworks displays. One weekend this summer, they cruised a waterfront Celtic festival in Bristol. Another time, they dropped by a fireman's benefit at a riverside cafe called Maggie's.

"Everybody likes to see a fireboat pumping," he says, beaming. "We put on a show."
 
2012-07-29 05:04:18 PM
I could see Philadelphia or even Trenton having something like this boat, but Bensalem?
 
2012-07-29 05:05:09 PM

One Bad Apple: A Dark Evil Omen: Lsherm: When people talk about "government waste" - stories like this are what floats around the back of their head.

Military and law enforcement is always the source of this shiat.


Except when it isn't. Like in TFA.


Benevolent Misanthrope: A Dark Evil Omen: Lsherm: When people talk about "government waste" - stories like this are what floats around the back of their head.

Military and law enforcement is always the source of this shiat.

So, of course, they best way to address "government waste" is to cut everything else and throw more money at military and law enforcement.

It's a fire department, genuis. And they're also to blame for alot of this stuff. Police and fire are untouchable in the funding world. Public Works is a distant third when it comes to allocation priority.


Anti-terrorism doesn't relate to military and law enforcement? Really? Really? And, yes, it is also true that fire gets basically unlimited funding priority.
 
2012-07-29 05:13:04 PM

A Dark Evil Omen:

Anti-terrorism doesn't relate to military and law enforcement? Really? Really? And, yes, it is also true that fire gets basically unlimited funding priority.


Firefighters have no athorah-tie to make arrests, really. The have even less police powers than the TSA, really.

As far as "anti-terror" they are no different than paramedics or whoever cleans up debris after a bombing.


They are NOT an enforcement agency of the government. They can't even write parking tickets. No really.
 
2012-07-29 05:15:39 PM
Obama said government is the reason, if we are successful.
 
2012-07-29 05:17:21 PM
vollies
 
2012-07-29 05:18:28 PM

quatchi: Bensalem locals talk endlessly about the imposing 40-foot, 25,000-pound "Bear on the Delaware" that has been prowling all year but has yet to fight a fire or sniff out a bomb.

Bin Laden is dead.

Even when he was alive the chances of AQ taking on America again by setting stuff on fire within a certain yardage along a specific part of the Delaware River was already pretty slim.

Wasting resources is wasteful.


Why are you siding with the terrorists who want to destroy our freedom?

/graduate of Palin debating Institute.
 
2012-07-29 05:19:42 PM

smitty04: Obama said government is the reason, if we are successful.


0/10 try a little harder next time
 
2012-07-29 05:20:45 PM

WhoIsNotInMyKitchen: quatchi: Bensalem locals talk endlessly about the imposing 40-foot, 25,000-pound "Bear on the Delaware" that has been prowling all year but has yet to fight a fire or sniff out a bomb.

Bin Laden is dead.

Even when he was alive the chances of AQ taking on America again by setting stuff on fire within a certain yardage along a specific part of the Delaware River was already pretty slim.

Wasting resources is wasteful.

Why are you siding with the terrorists who want to destroy our freedom?

/graduate of Palin debating Institute.




Congrats, I heard you dropped out.
 
2012-07-29 05:21:21 PM

vernonFL: I could see Philadelphia or even Trenton having something like this boat, but Bensalem?


In all fairness, I think there are many people involved in the decision-making process that would LOVE to see Trenton burn to the ground.
 
2012-07-29 05:22:42 PM

Lsherm: When people talk about "government waste" - stories like this are what floats around the back of their head.


I remember in 2008 when everyone gave Sarah Palin grief about the 'bridge to nowhere'. At first, I did, too. Then I looked at the proposal. It was exactly what government should be used for- infrastructure to help people's lives. Now, I thought Sarah Palin was awful, but the bridge (not her idea, by the way) was a good thing.

The TSA, Homeland Security, Arpaio's tank, this thing, billions wasted in Iraq that are unaccounted for- those are wasteful spending. Bridges, roads, sewer, water delivery- those are examples of wise investments.
 
2012-07-29 05:24:06 PM

WhoIsNotInMyKitchen: Why are you siding with the terrorists who want to destroy our freedom?


I don't know about him, but I'm actually siding with the "terrorists" who are laughing their nuts off at stupid sh*t like this.

www.yourfunnystuff.com
 
2012-07-29 05:25:39 PM
Yeesh, Bensalem......you should have spent the homeland security money on garbage trucks like Newark NJ did, it would have been a more useful vehicle.
 
2012-07-29 05:25:49 PM

Nadie_AZ: I remember in 2008 when everyone gave Sarah Palin grief about the 'bridge to nowhere'. At first, I did, too. Then I looked at the proposal. It was exactly what government should be used for- infrastructure to help people's lives. Now, I thought Sarah Palin was awful, but the bridge (not her idea, by the way) was a good thing.


4.bp.blogspot.com
 
2012-07-29 05:26:48 PM

Giltric: Yeesh, Bensalem......you should have spent the homeland security money on garbage trucks like Newark NJ did, it would have been a more useful vehicle.


In Newark's defense, those are the most common vehicles there.
 
2012-07-29 05:27:24 PM
Meanwhile, there are small volunteer departments and rescue squads who can't even get money to replace their 20 year old Jaws of Life, 1980s firetruck, or update their airpacks and turnout gear.

fark these people and their waste of taxpayer dollars.
 
2012-07-29 05:31:47 PM

BronyMedic: Meanwhile, there are small volunteer departments and rescue squads who can't even get money to replace their 20 year old Jaws of Life, 1980s firetruck, or update their airpacks and turnout gear.

fark these people and their waste of taxpayer dollars.


That's very true, and is definitely an illustration of misappropriation of public funds.

However, post - 9/11, "Homeland Security" was the buzzword. People were so afraid of terrorism that they were buying duct tape and plastic sheeting and ironing their mail, even though the statistics showed they would have been better off spending that money on lottery tickets.

If the anti-terrorism money hadn't been spent somewhere, on something that could be called "anti-terrorism", the Bush Administration would have caught flack for not doing everything they could to prevent another attack.
 
2012-07-29 05:34:15 PM

One Bad Apple: They are NOT an enforcement agency of the government. They can't even write parking tickets. No really.


They have other ways of dealing with parking infractions.
t1.gstatic.com
 
2012-07-29 05:34:28 PM
If you dont waste taxpayer dollars, you are un-American

USA! USA! USA!
 
2012-07-29 05:35:02 PM
I have seen lists of the most ridiculous uses of federal taxpayer money that went to cities and towns right after 9/11, allegedly to help them prevent terrorist attacks.

I can't seem to find one at the moment, but if some intrepid Farker can pull one up, there's a "boatload" of stuff even worse than this. ;)
 
2012-07-29 05:43:14 PM

Nadie_AZ: I remember in 2008 when everyone gave Sarah Palin grief about the 'bridge to nowhere'. At first, I did, too. Then I looked at the proposal. It was exactly what government should be used for- infrastructure to help people's lives. Now, I thought Sarah Palin was awful, but the bridge (not her idea, by the way) was a good thing.


Really? It was a $400 million project (and let's not pretend it would've come in on budget, folks...) to connect an island of 50 people.

They could've bought each resident a personal helicopter. Or they could just use/upgrade the existing ferry.
 
2012-07-29 05:47:27 PM
"The Bensalem police have an armored car," argues Dave Jerri Sr., a Union member and boat defender. "When's the last time they used it?"

That's how you defend wasting a bunch of money on shiat you don't need or even know how to properly use? "Look! They waste your money too! That makes it okay for us to waste your money!"

And really? Detection of IEDs and icebreaking capacity up to 5" thick on the Delaware?

The boat came outfitted with an area to detain prisoners, a stable shooting platform and an infrared camera for night ops, even though Union members cannot fire weapons or make arrests.

WTF? Oh well, we better cut funding to NPR and Obama's teleprompter, oh and public schools. We gotta keep buying stupid shiat like this so we'll be safe from the terrorists. We'd better make some more tax cuts for the rich while we're at it; we need them to keep creating those sweet jobs and keeping our economy strong.
 
2012-07-29 05:47:35 PM
Nadie_AZ:
I remember in 2008 when everyone gave Sarah Palin grief about the 'bridge to nowhere'. At first, I did, too. Then I looked at the proposal. It was exactly what government should be used for- infrastructure to help people's lives. Now, I thought Sarah Palin was awful, but the bridge (not her idea, by the way) was a good thing.

That's... breathtaking.

There was no need for it, it wasn't going to cause a sudden Renaissance in the area, and it was mostly just a way to shovel money to some politician's donors. The bridge was going to be about as long as the Golden Gate Bridge. It was going to cost about $400 MILLION dollars, to serve an island with fifty residents and a not-very-big airport. The island already has a functional ferry service.

It was not a good thing. Really. Whatever you read, suggesting that it was? They lied to you.
 
2012-07-29 05:49:33 PM
You wheelchair generals don't know how dangerous a river can be. I've seen waves as high as your knee come crashing onto shore. Without a bulkhead you could easily get your shoes wet. The tarotists would love to wet the shoes of decent freedom-loving Americans since they have a corner on the saddle soap market. And what about shoe polish, in particular a brand called Kiwi? Hello!!! New Zealanders holding our unpolished shoes for ransom while tarotists deny us the very saddle soap we need to survive!!! If that doesn't chill you to the bone, consider this: we'll have to rob graves in order to obtain decent, high-quality, properly shined footwear. Need I point out that grave-robbing is illegal, not to say time-consuming? But I'm not the only one who can see where this is going. Thank Gawd for brave men like, umm, whoever the hell those guys are in that article, helping to keep our shoes dry while having a blast and a half on the river in a million-dollar boat. In the meantime, get a shovel and meet me at the cemetery. I know where there's some Italian loafers, you gotta see them.
 
2012-07-29 05:49:44 PM
America is going to security itself into third world status. Brilliant idea, turn the country into a poverty stricken shiathole not worth the cost of a bomb.
 
2012-07-29 05:55:45 PM
Quick! Take the volunteers' pensions!
 
2012-07-29 05:57:28 PM
Partisan politics aside for a moment (Hey, it *could* happen) am I the only one to be disappointed at what a million dollar "terrorist fighting super boat" looked like?

/After reading the headline I kinda imagined a submersible version of KITT from Knight Rider only with lasers on the roof and stuff.
//Maybe just me there.
 
2012-07-29 06:00:39 PM

WhoIsNotInMyKitchen: Why are you siding with the terrorists who want to destroy our freedom?

/graduate of Palin debating Institute.


Er ...because Jesus?

/Dropped out of Palin debating school half ways through the year.
 
2012-07-29 06:03:19 PM
Lack of knightboat references.

There's always an inlet or a fjord
 
2012-07-29 06:04:04 PM
this money shouldn't even be available obviously, unless we are talking about protecting nationally important infrastucture, like wall street, the chicago mercantile exchange, the port of houston or LA, etc.
 
2012-07-29 06:08:19 PM

Nadie_AZ: Lsherm: When people talk about "government waste" - stories like this are what floats around the back of their head.

I remember in 2008 when everyone gave Sarah Palin grief about the 'bridge to nowhere'. At first, I did, too. Then I looked at the proposal. It was exactly what government should be used for- infrastructure to help people's lives. Now, I thought Sarah Palin was awful, but the bridge (not her idea, by the way) was a good thing.

The TSA, Homeland Security, Arpaio's tank, this thing, billions wasted in Iraq that are unaccounted for- those are wasteful spending. Bridges, roads, sewer, water delivery- those are examples of wise investments.


Except she changed her stance on the bridge, kept the money, bragged that the bridge wasn't built and didn't mention that she kept the money. Still built the access road so that she didn't have to return that money, and the road really goes to nowhere. Link
 
2012-07-29 06:25:47 PM
This would make a quaint summer comedy movie screenplay.
 
2012-07-29 06:41:22 PM
But it it big enough to fight a Jaws?
 
2012-07-29 06:57:12 PM

Ackbar_GastricFluid: But it it big enough to fight a Jaws?


You're going to need a bigger boat.
 
2012-07-29 07:02:07 PM

One Bad Apple: WhoIsNotInMyKitchen: quatchi: Bensalem locals talk endlessly about the imposing 40-foot, 25,000-pound "Bear on the Delaware" that has been prowling all year but has yet to fight a fire or sniff out a bomb.

Bin Laden is dead.

Even when he was alive the chances of AQ taking on America again by setting stuff on fire within a certain yardage along a specific part of the Delaware River was already pretty slim.

Wasting resources is wasteful.

Why are you siding with the terrorists who want to destroy our freedom?

/graduate of Palin debating Institute.



Congrats, I heard you dropped out.


Dropping out halfway through is actually how you complete the program.
 
2012-07-29 07:08:59 PM
www.gilfether.com
 
2012-07-29 07:09:09 PM

One Bad Apple: Why are you siding with the terrorists who want to destroy our freedom?

/graduate of Palin debating Institute.

Congrats, I heard you dropped out.


That's the only way to truly succeed. You don't want to be a lame-duck debate graduate, do ya?
 
2012-07-29 07:11:48 PM
Blue_Blazer:
Dropping out halfway through is actually how you complete the program.

Oh, you had a bunch of people hitting you with bogus politically-oriented lawsuits too, so your choice was quit or go bankrupt?
 
2012-07-29 07:13:58 PM
Quebec surrenders.
 
2012-07-29 07:20:04 PM

BarkingUnicorn: At first, I thought four long pages were too much for this story. But after reading all them I see there's plenty of fail to fill them.


Upon your advice, I read the whole thing. You're right, it's just about the right length to tell the whole story.
 
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