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(The Sun)   Smoking hot 23-year-old: "I've been binge drinking since I was 11, now I'm blind in one eye" (w/pics)   (thesun.co.uk) divider line 168
    More: Dumbass, admission note, classical conditions, jennifer, effects of alcohol, Britain, Department of Health  
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44856 clicks; posted to Main » on 28 Jul 2012 at 5:08 AM (1 year ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2012-07-28 08:36:05 AM
Sun? Check
Subby says smokin' hot? check
She could make the Devil scream? Don't know. Didn't click the link.
 
2012-07-28 08:38:26 AM

OhioUGrad: dletter: So, just a question.... is every woman in the UK a farked up mom with a 5 year old by the time they are 22 and live in public housing? At least from the stories we get on Fark it appears so.

Because that would be totally different from the US where every girl has a kid by age 25 and a divorce under their belt.


OhioUGrad: dletter: So, just a question.... is every woman in the UK a farked up mom with a 5 year old by the time they are 22 and live in public housing? At least from the stories we get on Fark it appears so.

Because that would be totally different from the US where every girl has a kid by age 25 and a divorce under their belt.


A kid by 25? The horrors! Everyone knows that responsible moms wait until they're 42 so they can have their own super special chromosomally gifted wonderchild.

I think the Sun has a madlib like algorithm set up. [white trash name], [15-25] from [name of public housing development] in [name]fordshire has [bizarre or extreme life-threatening addiction or habit] and [if under 18: her parents won't stop her!; if over 18: she got pregnant and stopped but then started again and says she can't stop because she loves {alcohol/modeling glue/chips/drinking gasoline/jamming forks in electrical sockets} too much]!

I wonder about the type of person who reads this. All I've got are 80s and 90s British sitcom stereotypes of fussy middle class 40 somethings exclaiming how it's so sad about the youth today.
 
2012-07-28 08:39:45 AM
has anyone mentioned that she's not too easy on the eyes?
 
2012-07-28 08:40:42 AM

TsarTom: Heh. I used to drink 3 or 4 liters of vodka, plus anywhere from 96-128 beers every day...


Andre? Have you come back from the dead?

www.dory-funk.com
 
2012-07-28 08:42:59 AM

dopeydwarf: FTA: Suzi blames her disobedient behaviour on the mental condition Oppositional Defiant Disorder (ODD),

OMFG, can we just drag all the psychologists and psychiatrists in the world into the street and shoot them yet?

/Why no, I'm not on medication.


This is not to say that some psychiatric conditions aren't self-diagnosed by asshats who have no interest in actually following up on their self-diagnosis or trying to resolve the issue in any way whatsoever or, in general, over-diagnosed (for various reasons--shiatty docs and patients, drug seeking, weird laws that only provide governmental/institutional support for specific diagnoses, lack of understanding of the root causes of most diseases and disorders, etc.), but I hope you're not trying to suggest that it is inherently harmful or counterproductive that mankind tries to understand how our brains function, dysfunction, what can cause/contribute to said dysfunctionality, and how to reverse or alleviate symptoms of mental disorders. Cause that'd just be silly.

/if we don't know how the brain works, why not keep studying it until we know?
//if a bunch of people present similar symptom, why not classify them as something and, as we better understand the underlying cause, revise the classification/therapy?
 
2012-07-28 08:45:31 AM
Meh, I'd hit it.

Add me to the list of regrets she'll never really remember, but knows they're in her past.


Like her kid.
 
2012-07-28 08:49:27 AM
Why wont the English teach their children how to speak?
 
2012-07-28 08:55:48 AM
The parents didn't know she had been drinking for years? That's an entire story all by itself.
 
2012-07-28 09:04:54 AM
so what happened to her eye? i have heard things about going blind from drinking bad moonshine, but this doesn't seem like that sort of thing. did she just fark it up somehow when she was blackout drunk and just not remember what happened? is there some function of long term alcohol abuse that affects eyesight, and could this be countered somehow by medical marijuana? (because then she would really be the life of the party)

/just skimmed article
 
2012-07-28 09:12:36 AM
" She says: "I can't give up the booze. I have the odd drink here and there, but I know my limits.
It was my birthday recently and I only drank eight beers and half a bottle of Malibu.
I'm not supposed to drink at all. It makes my liver swell up when I have a sip and I look like I'm pregnant."

It was the last line of this quote that struck me. If this is true she doesn't need to worry about teaching her kid to drink properly (or provide an obviously bad example for her). She will be dead. I had an uncle by marriage die of cirrhosis. It was horribly painful and brutal way to die.
 
2012-07-28 09:17:46 AM
Luckily I've learned the Fark.com lingo, "smoking hot" means tobacco has trashed her looks and she has some weird temperature disregulation disorder that's making her go bad like ham left out of the refrigerator.
 
2012-07-28 09:18:25 AM
I wonder if I could give her an eye patch, then give her surprise butt sex and afterwards smash her foot and when she hops around and scream ARGH!! loud as I can. Kinky
 
2012-07-28 09:31:57 AM
My breakfast is no longer enjoyable after reading this article.

/maybe I should start drinking beer for breakfast instead
 
2012-07-28 09:32:56 AM
Subby and I obviously have different opinions on what 'Smoking Hot' is... or was that the joke?
 
2012-07-28 09:33:14 AM
...she became pregnant with her then boyfriend...

A lost lyric from the classic song, "I'm My Own Grandpa."
 
2012-07-28 09:38:18 AM
p1.la-img.com
Say what you want, but she was pretty good in Men In Black.
 
2012-07-28 09:40:47 AM

CowardlyLion: dopeydwarf: FTA: Suzi blames her disobedient behaviour on the mental condition Oppositional Defiant Disorder (ODD),

OMFG, can we just drag all the psychologists and psychiatrists in the world into the street and shoot them yet?

/Why no, I'm not on medication.

This is not to say that some psychiatric conditions aren't self-diagnosed by asshats who have no interest in actually following up on their self-diagnosis or trying to resolve the issue in any way whatsoever or, in general, over-diagnosed (for various reasons--shiatty docs and patients, drug seeking, weird laws that only provide governmental/institutional support for specific diagnoses, lack of understanding of the root causes of most diseases and disorders, etc.), but I hope you're not trying to suggest that it is inherently harmful or counterproductive that mankind tries to understand how our brains function, dysfunction, what can cause/contribute to said dysfunctionality, and how to reverse or alleviate symptoms of mental disorders. Cause that'd just be silly.

/if we don't know how the brain works, why not keep studying it until we know?
//if a bunch of people present similar symptom, why not classify them as something and, as we better understand the underlying cause, revise the classification/therapy?


It certainly *can* be harmful.

That doesn't mean that I don't think we should study psychological disorders, but it's silly to pretend that our study of it cannot have harmful side-effects.
 
2012-07-28 09:51:23 AM
i've been boozing since i was 21 now i have McDonald's morning after syndrome.
 
2012-07-28 09:56:57 AM

Asa Phelps: Elvis_Bogart: Smoking hot? Oh, that's right...British standards.

yeah, she's hot for a british chick, i guess



well, to be fair, she still has a nice tooth.
 
2012-07-28 10:08:06 AM
Smoking hot??? I guess beauty is in the eye of the beholder...
 
2012-07-28 10:17:56 AM

Fark_Guy_Rob: CowardlyLion: dopeydwarf: FTA: Suzi blames her disobedient behaviour on the mental condition Oppositional Defiant Disorder (ODD),

OMFG, can we just drag all the psychologists and psychiatrists in the world into the street and shoot them yet?

/Why no, I'm not on medication.

This is not to say that some psychiatric conditions aren't self-diagnosed by asshats who have no interest in actually following up on their self-diagnosis or trying to resolve the issue in any way whatsoever or, in general, over-diagnosed (for various reasons--shiatty docs and patients, drug seeking, weird laws that only provide governmental/institutional support for specific diagnoses, lack of understanding of the root causes of most diseases and disorders, etc.), but I hope you're not trying to suggest that it is inherently harmful or counterproductive that mankind tries to understand how our brains function, dysfunction, what can cause/contribute to said dysfunctionality, and how to reverse or alleviate symptoms of mental disorders. Cause that'd just be silly.

/if we don't know how the brain works, why not keep studying it until we know?
//if a bunch of people present similar symptom, why not classify them as something and, as we better understand the underlying cause, revise the classification/therapy?

It certainly *can* be harmful.

That doesn't mean that I don't think we should study psychological disorders, but it's silly to pretend that our study of it cannot have harmful side-effects.


Cool. I think we're in agreement, then.
 
2012-07-28 10:42:54 AM
So far Suzi has been lucky. If her liver fails completely there's nothing anyone could do, other than hope and pray for a transplant

No. Hell no. Fark no. Not until everyone else worldwide who needs a liver because of something that is no fault of their own gets one. You are last on the list, toots. Dead last.

You knew that drinking was ruining your liver. You were warned, warned again, and warned some more. You continued to drink anyway. And you have shown yourself incapable of stopping. If you didn't stop when you went blind, then you won't let something so small as a liver transplant slow you down. Give you a new liver and you'll just kill that one too.

I hope your babbydaddy is up to the task of full time fatherhood, because you are going to die very soon. Hopefully he won't be so eager to create a drinking partner out of her as soon as possible.

And no, hon, no new liver for you. Not yours.
 
2012-07-28 10:45:34 AM
I don't like the Sun's new layout, it took me way to long to find Page3.
 
2012-07-28 10:47:45 AM
I can admit it, I'd party with her.
 
2012-07-28 11:05:11 AM
I'd throw it in her. I'm not sure what it is I'd be throwing, but whatever it is, it'd be thrown in her.

/Any suggestions?
//Stick of dynamite?
///A bowling ball?
//A tub of lard?
////A giant cottonball to soak up all the alcohol?
 
2012-07-28 11:07:11 AM

namegoeshere: So far Suzi has been lucky. If her liver fails completely there's nothing anyone could do, other than hope and pray for a transplant

No. Hell no. Fark no. Not until everyone else worldwide who needs a liver because of something that is no fault of their own gets one. You are last on the list, toots. Dead last.

You knew that drinking was ruining your liver. You were warned, warned again, and warned some more. You continued to drink anyway. And you have shown yourself incapable of stopping. If you didn't stop when you went blind, then you won't let something so small as a liver transplant slow you down. Give you a new liver and you'll just kill that one too.

I hope your babbydaddy is up to the task of full time fatherhood, because you are going to die very soon. Hopefully he won't be so eager to create a drinking partner out of her as soon as possible.

And no, hon, no new liver for you. Not yours.


CSB:

A friend of mine is a hard-core alcoholic and as a joke, I suggested he put himself on the doner list for a new liver

He took it seriously and said he even went to see his doctor to try to be put on the list, but said he was denied since it was 'self-inflicted'
 
2012-07-28 11:34:36 AM
After all that drinking, I bet one pill of Tylenol would send her into liver failure.
 
2012-07-28 11:47:43 AM
She needs a sandwich, AND a beer.
 
2012-07-28 11:48:01 AM

mgshamster: After all that drinking, I bet one pill of Tylenol would send her into liver failure.


why do tylenol when you can have a DRINK
 
2012-07-28 11:51:26 AM

dletter: So, just a question.... is every woman in the UK a farked up mom with a 5 year old by the time they are 22 and live in public housing? At least from the stories we get on Fark it appears so.


UK is a classic example of a country where their immigrant population is basically supporting the 'natives'.
 
2012-07-28 11:54:01 AM
That, ladies and gentlemen, is the definition of "British Pretty".
 
2012-07-28 12:10:48 PM
I'd hit it. I wouldnt go bragging to anyone about it, but its better than farking a fat chick.
 
2012-07-28 12:11:40 PM

dopeydwarf: FTA: Suzi blames her disobedient behaviour on the mental condition Oppositional Defiant Disorder (ODD),

OMFG, can we just drag all the psychologists and psychiatrists in the world into the street and shoot them yet?

/Why no, I'm not on medication.


Are you saying that a children's condition with criteria such as:

(1) often loses temper
(2) often argues with adults
(3) often actively defies or refuses to comply with adults' requests or rules
(4) often deliberately annoys people

Is completely made up?

Can you imagine the horror of having a child who gets upset and refuses to eat their vegetables? Do you think this is a joke?
 
2012-07-28 12:15:39 PM

phlegmmo: Suzi blames her disobedient behavior on the mental condition Oppositional Defiant Disorder (ODD), which she claims was diagnosed when she was 14.

Doctor: "Hmm, that's odd."


Doctor: ODD is a diagnosis you give to people with antisocial personality disorder when they're under 18. Now that you're 18, you're a psychopath if you still meet criteria.

/Not medical advice.
 
2012-07-28 12:26:15 PM
img.photobucket.com
 
2012-07-28 12:26:31 PM
I'm pretty sure subby used "smoking hot" as a joke. Well done.
 
2012-07-28 12:44:15 PM
alcopop??
 
2012-07-28 12:55:23 PM

A Terrible Human: dready zim: Also what is Oppositional Defiant Disorder?
From what I know it's like the child version of anti social personality disorder.


Translation: She's a nutcase who will never get better, never accept responsibility for her drinking, and is a big drunk. Fascinating. I only know about 1000 people just like her.
 
2012-07-28 01:07:40 PM

fugeeface: alcopop??


aka Zima, Mike's Hard, Smirnoff Ice, etc. Fruity, sweet 'gateway' drinks often used as a whipping boy by the rabble-rousing British press corps to explain why there are underage alcoholics among the Britons.
 
2012-07-28 01:08:59 PM

Happy Hours: "At school, most of my friends were boys, but I didn't struggle to keep up with them. I could easily polish off a crate of beer - 24 cans - and a bottle of vodka in a day.

No, I'm not buying that especially for someone that thin.

A case of beer and a liter of vodak?

For one thing, how fast do you drink? 2 beers an hour means it would take 12 hours to drink a case of beer. Certainly some people can keep up a faster pace than that, but while you're also polishing off a liter of vodka?

I'm certain someone will reply by saying that's just a typical Monday afternoon for them but they're probably a fat fark who weighs 300 pounds and is also prone to exaggeration.


I used to drink a 6-pack of "craft" (6-10%) beer and a bottle of bourbon every other day. The days in between were to recuperate. Usually a bit of weed to help with the nausea and aches.
 
2012-07-28 01:11:05 PM
That isn't binge drinking. That there is straight up alcoholism.
 
2012-07-28 01:14:03 PM

TsarTom: Heh. I used to drink 3 or 4 liters of vodka, plus anywhere from 96-128 beers every day...

Happy Hours: I'm certain someone will reply by saying that's just a typical Monday afternoon for them but they're probably a fat fark who weighs 300 pounds and is also prone to exaggeration.

[ts2.mm.bing.net image 230x242]

Confession time guys: I was lying about the drinking part. I just wanted you to like me.


True story: read above. I used to drink just a little less (about half the ABVC of carbonated drinks, and about 6 less ounces of hard liquor) as is claimed that this girl would drink. AND I had to be up at 6 or 7 in order to get to the office by 10, sometimes earlier because I would have to teleconference with India or some place that was ready to call it a day.

I haven't had a drink in almost a month. I'd love to have one right now. But I don't get paid until Wednesday.
 
2012-07-28 01:17:48 PM

tortamus: I'm guessing you were relatively young and had a reasonably high metabolism at them time, coupled with alcohol's inhibitory affect on Anti-diuretic Hormone. ADH causes reabsorption of water in the renal tubules, replacing it back in the bloodstream. Alcohol inhibits secretion of ADH by the posterior pituitary, and thus you no longer retain water. That's why you have to urinate frequently when drinking. You were peeing yourself "thin" (you were losing water weight).

/teaches anatomy for a living


I doubt he was actually absorbing 2000 calories worth, since you never really absorb all of the calories in food (you can smell the carbs being pissed out once you hit it), plus alcohol alone bumps up your metabolism while you purge it. I should totally recommend that, the Happy Hours Beer Diet, only catch is that you can't eat or drink anything else for four weeks.

dletter: So, just a question.... is every woman in the UK a farked up mom with a 5 year old by the time they are 22 and live in public housing? At least from the stories we get on Fark it appears so.


That's EXACTLY the narrative The Sun and Daily Fail want to project to all of the grey hairs who insist that things were so much better in their day, to whip them into demanding that something must be done about the current generation. See also: Out of control town council stories. (In the US, it's HOA horror stories.)
 
2012-07-28 01:20:12 PM
Seriously? Smoking Hot? It looks like a giraffe in clothes.
 
2012-07-28 01:30:39 PM
There's no way she's drinking half as much in one day as she says she is. I think what happened here is she exaggerated how much she said she drank, then the Sun added their own exaggeration on top. You have to remember that British slappers and British tabloids are both full of shiat.
 
2012-07-28 01:31:34 PM
Glasses, Subby needs them.
 
2012-07-28 01:35:43 PM
Came here to studman69.

But... sharp doesn't even begin to describe her knees.
 
2012-07-28 01:36:25 PM

BarkingUnicorn: Well, at least she didn't get fat.


10,000 calories a day of pure sugar and the biatch don't have no fat on her at all.

I hate her, fark that eye business
 
2012-07-28 01:37:33 PM

FrancoFile: fugeeface: alcopop??

aka Zima, Mike's Hard, Smirnoff Ice, etc. Fruity, sweet 'gateway' drinks often used as a whipping boy by the rabble-rousing British press corps to explain why there are underage alcoholics among the Britons.


Because beer isn't absolutely everywhere on every college/uni campus. Nay, it must be those sugar drinks... just not all the ones popular with middle-aged women.

divgradcurl: so what happened to her eye? i have heard things about going blind from drinking bad moonshine, but this doesn't seem like that sort of thing. did she just fark it up somehow when she was blackout drunk and just not remember what happened? is there some function of long term alcohol abuse that affects eyesight, and could this be countered somehow by medical marijuana? (because then she would really be the life of the party)

/just skimmed article


Could be trauma, could be alcohol-induced hypertension leading to repeated exploded eye blood vessels or maybe glaucoma. There's no known link specifically between alcohol and blindness, but that much alcohol farks you up in so many ways it's not surprising that she has multiple failures all over.
 
2012-07-28 02:03:51 PM
I love the british tabloids. Every day they have a, "I did something retarded and did permanent damage to myself" story.
 
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