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(Fox News)   Boy to undergo genital reconstruction surgery after rifle accident left him half-cocked   (foxnews.com) divider line 64
    More: Interesting, home country, surgery, rifles, rifle accident  
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6144 clicks; posted to Main » on 27 Jul 2012 at 5:55 AM (2 years ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2012-07-27 04:35:20 AM
That is COLD, Subby!

+1 to you.
 
2012-07-27 04:58:42 AM
FTFA:

For the procedure, known a phalloplasty, two medical teams will build a new penis for Luis using a fibular bone from a cadaver


1.bp.blogspot.com

/at least they can give him a chance to be mostly normal.
 
2012-07-27 05:59:17 AM

FirstNationalBastard: FTFA:

For the procedure, known a phalloplasty, two medical teams will build a new penis for Luis using a fibular bone from a cadaver


[1.bp.blogspot.com image 640x480]

/at least they can give him a chance to be mostly normal.


you owe me a fifth of whiskey and a new laptop you magnificent bastard
 
2012-07-27 06:00:49 AM
I just hope he doesn't end up bitter and vengeful.

www.virginmedia.com
 
2012-07-27 06:06:18 AM
the penis doesn't HAVE a bone
your putting a bone in something that doesn't need one (it gets erect with blood)
 
2012-07-27 06:08:50 AM

Jon iz teh kewl: the penis doesn't HAVE a bone
your putting a bone in something that doesn't need one (it gets erect with blood)


Then why is it called a boner, huh smartman?
Case dismissed.
 
2012-07-27 06:10:51 AM
Luis Canelos destroyed most of his genitalia at age 9, when he picked up his father's rifle and accidentally shot himself in the groin.

I'll admit that I was amazed while reading this that Luis/the reporter admits that he accidentally shot himself. There was none of the usual "it just went off" nonsense, it was really refreshing.

Then I read further & saw that it happened in rural Peru where apparently word hasn't filtered down that things that happen in life are never the fault of the person who did it. So much for progress.

/congrats to the young man for almost receiving the extremely rare non-posthumous Darwin Award
 
2012-07-27 06:11:03 AM

God-is-a-Taco: Jon iz teh kewl: the penis doesn't HAVE a bone
your putting a bone in something that doesn't need one (it gets erect with blood)

Then why is it called a boner, huh smartman?
Case dismissed.


cause when you snap the "bone" it turns blue??
 
2012-07-27 06:22:25 AM
It might be tough to get a girlfriend, being a young man of his caliber.
 
2012-07-27 06:22:51 AM
www.daviddarling.info

For those of you who aren't aware of what a fibula bone looks like.
 
2012-07-27 06:22:53 AM
Sad tag!
Probably good it happened before puberty-poor kiddy!
 
2012-07-27 06:22:56 AM
He'll never be the head of a major corporation.
 
2012-07-27 06:23:29 AM
I suppose at age 9 he was like "what's the big deal? I can still pee out of it."
Now he's 17 he's all like "fix it fix it fix it fix it fix it fix it FIX IT!"
 
2012-07-27 06:24:42 AM
Or Florida tag?
 
2012-07-27 06:26:02 AM

kareninsf: Or Florida tag?


The kid lives in Peru, not Florida.
 
2012-07-27 06:26:50 AM

sjcousins: I suppose at age 9 he was like "what's the big deal? I can still pee out of it."
Now he's 17 he's all like "fix it fix it fix it fix it fix it fix it FIX IT!"


sadlyiamemo.com
 
2012-07-27 06:28:24 AM
I wonder if it will be hard all the time, or like a normal one that goes soft. If the dude can pick his size we might see him in videos later.
 
2012-07-27 06:32:09 AM
For the procedure, known a phalloplasty, two medical teams will build a new penis for Luis using a fibular bone from a cadaver

Dead man walking. Dead penis f*cking.
 
2012-07-27 06:32:14 AM

Jon iz teh kewl: sjcousins: I suppose at age 9 he was like "what's the big deal? I can still pee out of it."
Now he's 17 he's all like "fix it fix it fix it fix it fix it fix it FIX IT!"


Thankyou sir. Exactly what I had in mind!

/too lazy to follow through.
 
2012-07-27 06:32:52 AM
The average human fibula is about 18 inches long.

MEGABONER
 
2012-07-27 06:42:25 AM
Will it be from a white cadaver or a black cadaver? Just sayin' because...you know...
 
2012-07-27 06:42:48 AM

Recoil Therapy:

/congrats to the young man for almost receiving the extremely rare non-posthumous Darwin Award


Not necessarily.

The article says they hope that this operation will leave him able to have children.

And even if it didn't, from the way they're talking, the boys are still intact, so he could probably contribute genetic material somehow.
 
2012-07-27 06:44:20 AM
I hope it is from a black cadaver because we wouldn't want him to go off half-cocked, now would we?
 
2012-07-27 06:46:51 AM

Bathia_Mapes: kareninsf: Or Florida tag?

The kid lives in Peru, not Florida.


Ty
 
2012-07-27 06:57:19 AM
I wish the kid luck with the Jack Shaftoe procedure.
 
2012-07-27 06:57:41 AM

phojo1946: I hope it is from a black cadaver because we wouldn't want him to go off half-cocked, now would we?


How are you going to make the same exact pun as the headline.
 
2012-07-27 07:03:00 AM
How the heck do you accidentally shoot yourself in the dick with a rifle? Pistol, I can see- just barely, but a longgun? And why are they repairing it? Do they seriously want this dumbfark to breed?
 
2012-07-27 07:03:57 AM
Tonight, on a Very Special Episode of Blossom...
 
2012-07-27 07:04:52 AM

Jon iz teh kewl: your putting a bone in something that doesn't need one


An expert in reconstructive surgery are you, now?
Perhaps a normal penis doesn't need one, but this one got shot to smithereens. I imagine that might cause some complications for normal wang-function.

/BTW, it's "you're". A contraction of "you are". "Your" is possessive.
 
2012-07-27 07:05:54 AM
You'll shoot your one eyed monster out kid!

/Christmas Story: The Older Years?
 
2012-07-27 07:27:09 AM

Gawdzila: Jon iz teh kewl: your putting a bone in something that doesn't need one

An expert in reconstructive surgery are you, now?
Perhaps a normal penis doesn't need one, but this one got shot to smithereens. I imagine that might cause some complications for normal wang-function.

/BTW, it's "you're". A contraction of "you are". "Your" is possessive.


if *I* can't have sex. this guy shouldn't be able to etiher.
might as well graduate to an opiate addiction.
there's your "high"
 
2012-07-27 07:28:16 AM
FTFA: "I want to recover my body, be young again," Luis told the Miami Herald.

You want to be young again?

Dude. You're seventeen. I'm not getting off your lawn. You're mowing mine.
 
2012-07-27 07:54:36 AM
Gentlemen, we can rebuild him. We have the technology. We have the capability to build the world's first bionic penis. Luis Canelos will be that man. Better than he was before. Better, stronger, faster.
 
2012-07-27 07:59:28 AM
I hope everything comes out alright for him.
 
2012-07-27 08:21:07 AM
eeeewwwwww

ZOMBIE WEENIE!!!!!
 
2012-07-27 08:30:19 AM
Why not contact Donors With Boners and see about getting a live replacement?
 
2012-07-27 08:42:38 AM

God-is-a-Taco: Jon iz teh kewl: the penis doesn't HAVE a bone
your putting a bone in something that doesn't need one (it gets erect with blood)

Then why is it called a boner, huh smartman?
Case dismissed.


My guess would be because some species have a naturally occurring bone in their penis
 
2012-07-27 08:46:17 AM
god damn, hope the surgery goes well. If the berries are still fully functional, has the poor bastard been walking around with blue balls for the last four years of his life? GET THIS MAN A WANG, STAT!
 
2012-07-27 08:51:01 AM
On the bright side, we've already learned that just because the penis gets destroyed in a child, that doesn't mean we can simply raise him as a girl.

photo.goodreads.com

/RIP David Reimer.
 
2012-07-27 08:58:48 AM
He should have had better control of his weapons.
 
2012-07-27 09:00:47 AM

Bathia_Mapes: [www.daviddarling.info image 350x251]

For those of you who aren't aware of what a fibula bone looks like.


That's gonna be one hell of a huge boner. Here's hoping he'll make a full and speedy recovery, be popular with the ladies.

i.imgur.com
 
2012-07-27 09:13:16 AM

Teiritzamna: I wish the kid luck with the Jack Shaftoe procedure.


I'm currently reading Quicksilver and came here hoping for this reference.
 
2012-07-27 09:20:23 AM

wambu: Bathia_Mapes: [www.daviddarling.info image 350x251]

For those of you who aren't aware of what a fibula bone looks like.

That's gonna be one hell of a huge boner. Here's hoping he'll make a full and speedy recovery, be popular with the ladies.

[i.imgur.com image 600x450]


"OW OW OW IT HURTS STOP!!!"
 
2012-07-27 09:21:37 AM
Maybe the bone is just a temporary scaffolding for the penis to grow around and later it gets removed?
 
2012-07-27 09:23:36 AM
"Gentlemen, we can rebuild him. We have the technology. We have the capability to build the world's first bionic cock. Luis Canelos' cock will be that tool. Better than it was before. Harder, faster, deeper!"

/oblig
 
2012-07-27 09:31:46 AM
very nice, subby
 
2012-07-27 09:40:41 AM

Jon iz teh kewl: the penis doesn't HAVE a bone
your putting a bone in something that doesn't need one (it gets erect with blood)


Most mammals do have a bone to stiffen their dicks. It's called a baculum. You can buy them on eBay in various sizes.
 
2012-07-27 09:42:12 AM
Farkettes: Would you want to be warned before you slept with FrankenWeiner?
 
2012-07-27 09:45:45 AM

Jon iz teh kewl: the penis doesn't HAVE a bone
your putting a bone in something that doesn't need one (it gets erect with blood)


I also thought that sounded weird, so I checked wiki. Apparantly it is one of the various phalloplasty methods, however it results in a penis that has no ability to become flaccid again without breaking the internal bone graft.

That sounds ... painful.
 
2012-07-27 09:48:09 AM

LiquidSky: Jon iz teh kewl: the penis doesn't HAVE a bone
your putting a bone in something that doesn't need one (it gets erect with blood)

I also thought that sounded weird, so I checked wiki. Apparantly it is one of the various phalloplasty methods, however it results in a penis that has no ability to become flaccid again without breaking the internal bone graft.

That sounds ... painful.


well at least you wouldn't have to take Viagra or stop smoking!
 
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