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(Buzzfeed)   Because his pretaped monologue featured several Batman jokes, Craig Ferguson took the monologue off the program and replaced it with this heartfelt address   ( divider line
    More: Followup, Batman, monologues, TDKR  
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9096 clicks; posted to Entertainment » on 22 Jul 2012 at 3:10 AM (5 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»

Voting Results (Funniest)
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest

2012-07-22 04:28:11 AM  
3 votes:

Coelacanth: Leno would've rerun an old show.

How can you tell they're new?
2012-07-22 07:57:37 AM  
2 votes:

BalugaJoe: I like Geoff.Balls

2012-07-22 07:17:05 AM  
2 votes:
Good on you, Craig. One of the reasons you're one of the best late night hosts we'll ever see.

Now, can you please convince Kristen Bell to come back and do a show in her underwear?
2012-07-22 12:46:15 AM  
2 votes:
Q: How many Batmans does it take to change a light-bulb?

A: None. They like the dark.


Batman and Robin are camping in the desert, set up their tent and are asleep. Some hours later, Batman wakes his faithful friend. "Robin, look up at the sky and tell me what you see."

Robin replies, " I see millions of stars."

"What does that tell you?" asks Batman.

Robin ponders for a minute.

"Astronomically speaking, it tells me that there are millions of galaxies and potentially billions of planets.

Astrologically, it tells me that Saturn is in Leo.

Chronologically, it appears to be approximately a quarter past three.

Theologically, it's evident the Lord is all-powerful and we are small and insignificant.

Meteorologically, it seems we will have a beautiful day tomorrow.

What does it tell you, Batman?"

Batman is silent for a moment, then speaks:

" Robin, you idiot, someone has stolen our tent."


There is a big room with four corners. In the first corner, you find Superman. In the second corner you find Batman. In the third corner you find Spiderman. And in the fourth corner you find a gorgeous, extremely intelligent, 100% natural blonde woman with a ultra-thin magazine-model figure. In the center of the room there is a pot of gold. Who gets to the pot of gold first?

A: None, because none of these characters exist.
2012-07-22 10:00:46 PM  
1 vote:
I do have to say that I would have felt better if Alex the Intern had returned to comfort me.
2012-07-22 12:14:10 PM  
1 vote:

stoli n coke: Now, can you please convince Kristen Bell to come back and do a show in her underwear?

Anyone's underwear, really. I'll loan her mine, if she likes.
2012-07-22 10:09:54 AM  
1 vote:

StoPPeRmobile: [ image 250x205]

That was him? Beer milkshakes?!
2012-07-22 09:58:20 AM  
1 vote:
2012-07-22 05:24:14 AM  
1 vote:
Not to rip on anyone I see posting here, but if only "Dear Prudie" threads were met with such scrutiny...
2012-07-22 04:16:22 AM  
1 vote:
Leno would've rerun an old show.
2012-07-22 12:25:08 AM  
1 vote:
He's a hero. An inspiration to us all that had a pre-taped monologue, but had no choice after the fact, than deliver a heartfelt message because our bosses at the network told us to do it.
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