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(Townhall)   O'Rielly: People can succeed without government. As examples: two athletes whose offices' were constructed with city bonds along with a singer and TV host whose products' are trasmitted over public airways   (townhall.com) divider line 381
    More: Fail, O'Rielly, athlete of the year, R.A. Dickey  
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3779 clicks; posted to Politics » on 21 Jul 2012 at 11:14 AM (2 years ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2012-07-21 06:12:34 AM
Well, we clearly need better quality government-provided education.
 
2012-07-21 06:20:56 AM
And food. some of the roads are provided by government so government provides food too.

And water. It falls through government provided air, so we would all die of thirst without government.

Oh, Oh, and the AIR ITSELF. It flows over government lands so we would all suffocate without it.

And gravity! why, without all that government land holding the planet together, we would all be floating amongst boulders and dust speeding through space to our very doom!

Thanks government, for making the planet and life as we know it possible at all. Gee, you sure are swell.
 
2012-07-21 07:54:23 AM
I'm sure Lady Gaga and Clint Eastwood would be just as rich without government-enforced intellectual property laws.
 
2012-07-21 07:56:57 AM

tomWright: And food. some of the roads are provided by government so government provides food too.

And water. It falls through government provided air, so we would all die of thirst without government.

Oh, Oh, and the AIR ITSELF. It flows over government lands so we would all suffocate without it.

And gravity! why, without all that government land holding the planet together, we would all be floating amongst boulders and dust speeding through space to our very doom!

Thanks government, for making the planet and life as we know it possible at all. Gee, you sure are swell.


But you don't worry about your food, water, and air being contaminated due to government.
 
2012-07-21 07:59:48 AM
i.imgur.com
 
2012-07-21 08:02:02 AM

MadAzza: Well, we clearly need better quality government-provided education.


Everyone knows that State Universities don't do jack for anyone, nor do education grants. And military training and education? Pfft! Who ever succeeded after a career in the socialist military? I mean, the only people who amounted to anything came from privately funded education--none of that milk pap "public education." I mean, who ever heard of anyone ever making it in that boondoggle of the defense industry? Internet? Pfft! Just pie in the sky stuff with nerds huddled around boxes. The REAL guts means that you carve up your own computer with your own two hands, string wires with slave labor across continents, and never, ever, ever use treaty status or trade agreements made by that damn gub'ment, right? Those are for pussies. Taking subsidies? That's slavery! Real men reject such things, and never, ever, ever, rely on anyone else that doesn't has their hands deep into your pockets...
 
2012-07-21 08:04:43 AM
In these examples, its the inability to empathize with others that probably bothers me the most.
 
2012-07-21 08:14:02 AM
American Airlines Arena is actually owned by the Miami-Dade County Government.
 
2012-07-21 08:14:44 AM

tomWright: And food. some of the roads are provided by government so government provides food too.

And water. It falls through government provided air, so we would all die of thirst without government.

Oh, Oh, and the AIR ITSELF. It flows over government lands so we would all suffocate without it.

And gravity! why, without all that government land holding the planet together, we would all be floating amongst boulders and dust speeding through space to our very doom!

Thanks government, for making the planet and life as we know it possible at all. Gee, you sure are swell.


Do you like getting electronics and other imports from overseas at reasonable prices? Thank the US Navy for keeping the sea lanes open.
 
2012-07-21 08:27:57 AM
i43.tinypic.com
 
2012-07-21 08:36:12 AM
What most folks fail to realize that the "government" that they complain about so vociferously about are our employees. Doing what we ask them to do. With specific mandates and specific instructions. This government isn't imposed upon us by some outside source. It is by, of, and for the people.

The government IS us. All of us. It's supposed to enable us to succeed, because we keep asking it to do things to allow that. Clean air, clean water, safety net so old people don't die in the streets, food standards, keeping our kids out of work houses, no selling of citizens to other citizens, putting out fires, catching the guy who stole your car, supporting tech that isn't necessarily profitable, but is still important, keeping a supply of medicines that aren't necessarily needed now, but might be down the road.

Some folks really hate that.

But it doesn't keep them from using what they've paid for, or asking for more...
 
2012-07-21 08:52:10 AM
A local jackwagon is always running his mouth about government interference in letters to the editor and such. He claims that, as a Real 'Merc'n Small BusinessHero, he creates jobs and doesn't count on the government for anything.

It's a paving company. That paves roads. Municipal roads.
 
2012-07-21 08:53:19 AM
People typing out their dumb opinions which will be transmitted worldwide in seconds using networks built almost exclusively with government/university/defense industry funds, and maintained for the most part by state/industry partnership corporations.
 
2012-07-21 08:54:13 AM

Mr. Coffee Nerves: A local jackwagon is always running his mouth about government interference in letters to the editor and such. He claims that, as a Real 'Merc'n Small BusinessHero, he creates jobs and doesn't count on the government for anything.

It's a paving company. That paves roads. Municipal roads.


I find myself wishing they'd quit paving roads for a while just so he could go out of business. Not that it'd help change his views, but just so I could laugh at his misfortune.
 
2012-07-21 08:56:47 AM

Mr. Coffee Nerves: A local jackwagon is always running his mouth about government interference in letters to the editor and such. He claims that, as a Real 'Merc'n Small BusinessHero, he creates jobs and doesn't count on the government for anything.

It's a paving company. That paves roads. Municipal roads.


I bet that guy rips lips on the government contracts, then complains about government waste.

That one might be my personal favorite when in mixed company. Its easy to hear a contractor gloat how they bilked the government out of extra money on the contract, then during the same day, biatch about waste.
 
2012-07-21 09:15:12 AM
Don't you all know the dogwhistle terms? "Government" ONLY means Federal Government. State and local governments are totally awesome to them.
 
2012-07-21 09:16:11 AM

hubiestubert: MadAzza: Well, we clearly need better quality government-provided education.

Everyone knows that State Universities don't do jack for anyone, nor do education grants. And military training and education? Pfft! Who ever succeeded after a career in the socialist military? I mean, the only people who amounted to anything came from privately funded education--none of that milk pap "public education." I mean, who ever heard of anyone ever making it in that boondoggle of the defense industry? Internet? Pfft! Just pie in the sky stuff with nerds huddled around boxes. The REAL guts means that you carve up your own computer with your own two hands, string wires with slave labor across continents, and never, ever, ever use treaty status or trade agreements made by that damn gub'ment, right? Those are for pussies. Taking subsidies? That's slavery! Real men reject such things, and never, ever, ever, rely on anyone else that doesn't has their hands deep into your pockets...


I think he was referring to the submitter's misused punctuation.
 
2012-07-21 09:18:46 AM

CruiserTwelve: hubiestubert: MadAzza: Well, we clearly need better quality government-provided education.

Everyone knows that State Universities don't do jack for anyone, nor do education grants. And military training and education? Pfft! Who ever succeeded after a career in the socialist military? I mean, the only people who amounted to anything came from privately funded education--none of that milk pap "public education." I mean, who ever heard of anyone ever making it in that boondoggle of the defense industry? Internet? Pfft! Just pie in the sky stuff with nerds huddled around boxes. The REAL guts means that you carve up your own computer with your own two hands, string wires with slave labor across continents, and never, ever, ever use treaty status or trade agreements made by that damn gub'ment, right? Those are for pussies. Taking subsidies? That's slavery! Real men reject such things, and never, ever, ever, rely on anyone else that doesn't has their hands deep into your pockets...

I think he was referring to the submitter's misused punctuation.


To be fair, that was more a leaping off point to preempt the eventual tide of DERP that will flow herein. Better to start off with a strong slice of mocking, and than watch folks toe up to the line, and the slowly creep over. Jump right in, I say.
 
2012-07-21 09:21:35 AM

EvilEgg: tomWright: And food. some of the roads are provided by government so government provides food too.

And water. It falls through government provided air, so we would all die of thirst without government.

Oh, Oh, and the AIR ITSELF. It flows over government lands so we would all suffocate without it.

And gravity! why, without all that government land holding the planet together, we would all be floating amongst boulders and dust speeding through space to our very doom!

Thanks government, for making the planet and life as we know it possible at all. Gee, you sure are swell.

But you don't worry about your food, water, and air being contaminated due to government.


Contamination! Yes! Contamination created by the internal combustion engine given to us by government. By all the industrial processes given to us by government. By the nuclear fallout and emissions from nuclear plants given to us by government. From the very fires in our barbeques given to us by government. What a wonderful plan. Think of the jobs this provides for EPA administrators, scientists and engineers to figure out how to clean it up. Government offers a constructive direction for professional complainers to target their outrage into constructive uses.

BRILLIANT! A brilliant plan, and just another example of the wonderful things government provides for us all.

We should all weep for joy for government.
 
2012-07-21 09:26:03 AM

tomWright: Contamination! Yes! Contamination created by the internal combustion engine given to us by government. By all the industrial processes given to us by government. By the nuclear fallout and emissions from nuclear plants given to us by government. From the very fires in our barbeques given to us by government. What a wonderful plan. Think of the jobs this provides for EPA administrators, scientists and engineers to figure out how to clean it up. Government offers a constructive direction for professional complainers to target their outrage into constructive uses.


You're going to have an aneurysm trying to bend over backwards to make that logical fallacy work.
 
2012-07-21 09:26:41 AM

Mentat: tomWright: And food. some of the roads are provided by government so government provides food too.

And water. It falls through government provided air, so we would all die of thirst without government.

Oh, Oh, and the AIR ITSELF. It flows over government lands so we would all suffocate without it.

And gravity! why, without all that government land holding the planet together, we would all be floating amongst boulders and dust speeding through space to our very doom!

Thanks government, for making the planet and life as we know it possible at all. Gee, you sure are swell.

Do you like getting electronics and other imports from overseas at reasonable prices? Thank the US Navy for keeping the sea lanes open.


Yes!, Yes! The iPads, iPods, iPhones given to us by government, transported safely by planes, trains and automobiles, all given to us by governmnet! Protected by the noble government agents of the high seas in the Navy and Coast Guard, (let us not forget the Coasties!)!

And all at prices set by our beneficent government and distributed through government vendors like Amazon and NewEgg! All in exchange for government provided money we get in exchange for our labor at our government provided jobs at our government provided employers.

Sniffle. It is such a thing of cohesive beauty, it is like a sunrise over a gentle sea.
 
2012-07-21 09:28:35 AM
What the fark did I just read!?!

The stupid, it burns like a thousand suns.
 
2012-07-21 09:29:44 AM

cameroncrazy1984: tomWright: Contamination! Yes! Contamination created by the internal combustion engine given to us by government. By all the industrial processes given to us by government. By the nuclear fallout and emissions from nuclear plants given to us by government. From the very fires in our barbeques given to us by government. What a wonderful plan. Think of the jobs this provides for EPA administrators, scientists and engineers to figure out how to clean it up. Government offers a constructive direction for professional complainers to target their outrage into constructive uses.

You're going to have an aneurysm trying to bend over backwards to make that logical fallacy work.


Aneurisms! Yes, government provided aneurisms to support the government provided health care, offered by government provided neural surgeons using government provided skills and government provided hands to help us all.

And backwards bending, required by that health plan to keep us healthy and limber. There is no end to the wonderful things given to us by government.

The extent of this plan is endless, endless!
 
2012-07-21 09:31:07 AM

tomWright: cameroncrazy1984: tomWright: Contamination! Yes! Contamination created by the internal combustion engine given to us by government. By all the industrial processes given to us by government. By the nuclear fallout and emissions from nuclear plants given to us by government. From the very fires in our barbeques given to us by government. What a wonderful plan. Think of the jobs this provides for EPA administrators, scientists and engineers to figure out how to clean it up. Government offers a constructive direction for professional complainers to target their outrage into constructive uses.

You're going to have an aneurysm trying to bend over backwards to make that logical fallacy work.

Aneurisms! Yes, government provided aneurisms to support the government provided health care, offered by government provided neural surgeons using government provided skills and government provided hands to help us all.

And backwards bending, required by that health plan to keep us healthy and limber. There is no end to the wonderful things given to us by government.

The extent of this plan is endless, endless!


It's posts like these that cause me to believe Reagan should not have closed the government mental health facilities.
 
2012-07-21 09:32:33 AM

tomWright: Derp


You can thank the Government for the internet that you're currently posting on, and for the fact that your meds have been thoroughly tested and shown not to be likely to kill you.

/speaking of which, I think it's time you took one of your pills again
 
2012-07-21 09:33:13 AM
Have you noticed all the great ideas and enterprises coming out of low tax havens like Somalia and Afghanistan?
 
2012-07-21 09:38:15 AM

Marcus Aurelius: Have you noticed all the great ideas and enterprises coming out of low tax havens like Somalia and Afghanistan?


Well yeah. I mean, have you seen their regulations? There's ZERO government interference there. Business is booming!
 
2012-07-21 09:38:19 AM
Dear mittens,

For someone who started a business with 37 million bucks of other people's money and a billionaire benefactor, maybe you shouldn't stress that "I did it all myself" bs.
 
2012-07-21 09:38:36 AM
That poor, poor chicken.
 
2012-07-21 09:42:58 AM

tomWright: X! Yes! X created by the Y given to us by government. By all the Z given to us by government.
BRILLIANT! A brilliant plan, and just another example of the wonderful things government provides for us all.

We should all weep for joy for government.


0/10

No, that's not a trolling score, that's a score for your attempt at creating a new meme.

Memes! Yes, memes! Given to us by the government!

/Ok, maybe 1/10 since I just reused it.
 
2012-07-21 09:43:57 AM

Quasar: That poor, poor chicken.


At this point, they're just masturbating with a few scraps of feathers...
 
2012-07-21 09:47:52 AM
um....am I the only one who has no idea what the hell the point of that article was...?
 
2012-07-21 10:10:00 AM

Weaver95: um....am I the only one who has no idea what the hell the point of that article was...?


Obama sucks.

Duh
 
2012-07-21 10:10:00 AM

cameroncrazy1984: tomWright: cameroncrazy1984: tomWright: Contamination! Yes! Contamination created by the internal combustion engine given to us by government. By all the industrial processes given to us by government. By the nuclear fallout and emissions from nuclear plants given to us by government. From the very fires in our barbeques given to us by government. What a wonderful plan. Think of the jobs this provides for EPA administrators, scientists and engineers to figure out how to clean it up. Government offers a constructive direction for professional complainers to target their outrage into constructive uses.

You're going to have an aneurysm trying to bend over backwards to make that logical fallacy work.

Aneurisms! Yes, government provided aneurisms to support the government provided health care, offered by government provided neural surgeons using government provided skills and government provided hands to help us all.

And backwards bending, required by that health plan to keep us healthy and limber. There is no end to the wonderful things given to us by government.

The extent of this plan is endless, endless!

It's posts like these that cause me to believe Reagan should not have closed the government mental health facilities.


No wonder I am posting! That darned Raygun took my mental health!

I need it back. I am going to write my Congressman today.
 
2012-07-21 10:13:48 AM

DammitIForgotMyLogin: tomWright: Derp

You can thank the Government for the internet that you're currently posting on, and for the fact that your meds have been thoroughly tested and shown not to be likely to kill you.

/speaking of which, I think it's time you took one of your pills again


Yes, my pills. My government provided pills, created by government provided scientists in government provided labs that used their government provided intelligence and government provided curiosity to find the basic ingredients and extract them from government provided herbs and plants found in government provided forests. I must go to the government provided pharmacy for them.

I will take my government provided 12 year old pickup to do that.
 
2012-07-21 10:14:37 AM

Prank Call of Cthulhu: tomWright: X! Yes! X created by the Y given to us by government. By all the Z given to us by government.
BRILLIANT! A brilliant plan, and just another example of the wonderful things government provides for us all.

We should all weep for joy for government.

0/10

No, that's not a trolling score, that's a score for your attempt at creating a new meme.

Memes! Yes, memes! Given to us by the government!

/Ok, maybe 1/10 since I just reused it.


See? Even memes are government provided, you have admitted it, I have won!
 
2012-07-21 10:18:00 AM

Weaver95: um....am I the only one who has no idea what the hell the point of that article was...?


So, you clicked the link, transmitting to a server hosting this property your desire for the server to deliver specific information. Your computer processed many different signals and output that to a large display likely using some form of liquid crystals that, when energized, change their properties and create a human-identifiable pattern of picture and text information.

Your eyes interpreted the light emanating from this device and transmitted that information to your occipital lobe. This section of the brain handed appropriate information off to the various other parts of your brain for their specific processing capabilities. The frontal lobe, medulla oblongata, hippocampus and other areas decoded the data provided and, through an electro-chemical reaction, collectively delivered a big 'ol WTF and shunted all that data to your brain stem, often called the lizard brain.

Your brain stem consumed the data. Mmmm, lizard-brain food. The brain stem gets a workout; this makes the brain stem stronger, the exercise gives it more handles to your general psyche. The more you feed it, the stronger it gets. Keep at it, you'll be in a Hoveround with a poorly-spelled sign.

And that, my friend, is the whole point of any article on TownHall.com.
 
2012-07-21 10:18:41 AM

hubiestubert: Weaver95: um....am I the only one who has no idea what the hell the point of that article was...?

Obama sucks.

Duh


And he's black. Or white, depending on which makes the most sense as a target today.
 
2012-07-21 10:31:45 AM
Is incoherent raving guy still drunk from last night, or is he off to a particularly vigorous early start with the Bloody Marys this a.m.?
 
2012-07-21 10:37:57 AM

DrBenway: Is incoherent raving guy still drunk from last night, or is he off to a particularly vigorous early start with the Bloody Marys this a.m.?


Why not both?
 
2012-07-21 11:05:35 AM
I'm going for Ethiopian food tonight. I dunno, all the talk about libertarian tax havens made me want to chime in with that.
 
2012-07-21 11:20:05 AM
reddogreport.com
"Government can't do anything right! Which is why you should elect me! I'm perfect for the job!"
 
2012-07-21 11:22:14 AM
Tax goes in, spending comes out. You can't explain that.
 
2012-07-21 11:22:47 AM

cameroncrazy1984: tomWright: Contamination! Yes! Contamination created by the internal combustion engine given to us by government. By all the industrial processes given to us by government. By the nuclear fallout and emissions from nuclear plants given to us by government. From the very fires in our barbeques given to us by government. What a wonderful plan. Think of the jobs this provides for EPA administrators, scientists and engineers to figure out how to clean it up. Government offers a constructive direction for professional complainers to target their outrage into constructive uses.

You're going to have an aneurysm trying to bend over backwards to make that logical fallacy work.


Amazing the perspective one gets when looking at a mirror.
 
2012-07-21 11:26:41 AM

Cataholic: Amazing the perspective one gets when looking at a mirror.


What logical fallacy did I use? Or were you talking about yourself?
 
2012-07-21 11:27:36 AM

tomWright: Yes, my pills. My government provided

inspected pills, created by government provided subsidized scientists in government provided subsidized labs that used their government provided intelligence subsidized research facilities (Universities receiving grant money) and government provided curiosity education to find the basic ingredients and extract them from government provided inspected herbs and plants found in government provided forests grow operations. I must go to the government provided licensed pharmacy for them.

I will take my government provided 12 year old pickup to do that.
on the government provided roads.

FTFY: you weren't far off.
 
2012-07-21 11:28:12 AM

Marcus Aurelius: Have you noticed all the great ideas and enterprises coming out of low tax havens like Somalia and Afghanistan?


If Steve Jobs' parents stayed in Syria you think you'd be reading this on your IPad?
 
2012-07-21 11:29:00 AM
This is what you get when conservatives try to be funny.
 
2012-07-21 11:29:52 AM

tomWright: Prank Call of Cthulhu: tomWright: X! Yes! X created by the Y given to us by government. By all the Z given to us by government.
BRILLIANT! A brilliant plan, and just another example of the wonderful things government provides for us all.

We should all weep for joy for government.

0/10

No, that's not a trolling score, that's a score for your attempt at creating a new meme.

Memes! Yes, memes! Given to us by the government!

/Ok, maybe 1/10 since I just reused it.

See? Even memes are government provided, you have admitted it, I have won!



Could someone please explain to this assbox how humor works?
 
2012-07-21 11:31:30 AM

ox45tallboy: [reddogreport.com image 600x423]
"Government can't do anything right! Which is why you should elect me! I'm perfect for the job!"


This might get interesting, I'm gonna make some popcorn.
 
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