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(Some Guy)   This six-year-old CAN judge books by their covers. For example A Clockwork Orange is "about a person who is a robot, a very colorful robot. He's pretty fancy for a robot"   (blogs.babble.com) divider line 68
    More: Amusing, The Great Gatsby, Animal Farm, Jean-Paul Sartre, F. Scott Fitzgerald, Moby Dick  
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8099 clicks; posted to Main » on 19 Jul 2012 at 10:44 AM (2 years ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2012-07-19 10:11:31 AM
I would read the hell out of that version of Clockwork Orange. Also:

"Atlas Shrugged
This is about Daydis (her spelling it's actually - Daedalus). He is an ancient god guy who prays a lot. This book is about him crying. He is crying because he doesn't like himself at all, because he hates himself. It looks like a saddy, saddy, saddy bookie.
Note: she loves Greek Mythology at bedtime hence the Daedalus reference. And really, who doesn't?

That is a better book than the real Atlas Shrugged.
 
2012-07-19 10:26:53 AM
Slaughter-House Five
"It's about the desert. It's a mystery about the desert. You know, I think it's actually about a slot machine that is lost in the desert."


I'd have read that story if Vonnegut wrote it.
 
2012-07-19 10:41:50 AM
This is f*cking adorable.
 
2012-07-19 10:44:22 AM
Kids are pretty awesome sometimes.
 
2012-07-19 10:44:59 AM
The descriptions of Wuthering Heights and Atlas Shrugged are strikingly appropriate.
 
2012-07-19 10:46:58 AM
Pretty fancy for a robot? What does that mean, kid? Robots can't be fancy? They're less than you? They all look alike to you?

You make me sick.
 
2012-07-19 10:51:41 AM
Somebody needs to kick that that little coont in the yarbles, if she has any yarbles.
 
2012-07-19 10:52:08 AM
"Atlas Shrugged
This is about Daydis (her spelling it's actually - Daedalus). He is an ancient god guy who prays a lot. This book is about him crying. He is crying because he doesn't like himself at all, because he hates himself. It looks like a saddy, saddy, saddy bookie.
Note: she loves Greek Mythology at bedtime hence the Daedalus reference. And really, who doesn't?"

I always suspected Atlas was upset Rand commandeered his name for her crap.
 
2012-07-19 10:52:22 AM
Kids are f*cking stupid.

If you see one, hit it with a rock.
 
ZAZ [TotalFark]
2012-07-19 10:54:11 AM
how does one explain James Joyce's Ulysses to a six-year-old?

How does one explain it to an adult?
 
2012-07-19 10:55:12 AM
I think it's a book about a haunted theme park

What kind of six-year-old calls it a theme park? Wouldn't she have said Haunted House or something like that? I wonder if the author just made these up and pretended it was her daughter.
 
2012-07-19 10:57:28 AM

jaylectricity: I think it's a book about a haunted theme park

What kind of six-year-old calls it a theme park? Wouldn't she have said Haunted House or something like that? I wonder if the author just made these up and pretended it was her daughter.


one who watches Scooby and Co in reruns.
 
2012-07-19 10:58:49 AM
I want to read a book about a zebra that wears pants.
 
2012-07-19 11:00:40 AM

olapbill: jaylectricity: I think it's a book about a haunted theme park

What kind of six-year-old calls it a theme park? Wouldn't she have said Haunted House or something like that? I wonder if the author just made these up and pretended it was her daughter.

one who watches Scooby and Co in reruns.


images.wikia.com
 
2012-07-19 11:01:05 AM

schattenteufel: I want to read a book about a zebra that wears pants.


Does the zebra call her "Kevin?"
 
2012-07-19 11:01:41 AM
That was cute.
 
2012-07-19 11:05:33 AM

bgddy24601: I would read the hell out of that version of Clockwork Orange. Also:

"Atlas Shrugged
This is about Daydis (her spelling it's actually - Daedalus). He is an ancient god guy who prays a lot. This book is about him crying. He is crying because he doesn't like himself at all, because he hates himself. It looks like a saddy, saddy, saddy bookie.
Note: she loves Greek Mythology at bedtime hence the Daedalus reference. And really, who doesn't?

That is a better book than the real Atlas Shrugged.


This book is better than Atlas Shrugged.
 
2012-07-19 11:08:49 AM

jaylectricity: I think it's a book about a haunted theme park

What kind of six-year-old calls it a theme park?


The kind that spells Daedalus as "Daydis".

Look, you have to assume Mom edited this a little bit. It happens.

It's still cute.
 
2012-07-19 11:14:16 AM

Wayne 985: hat mean, kid? Robots can't be fancy? They're less than you? They all look alike to you?

You make me sick.


I think I smell a robot.
 
2012-07-19 11:16:51 AM
Another weepy young devotchka- what does she have at home to play her records on? Come with uncle and hear all proper. You are invited.
 
2012-07-19 11:19:44 AM

Gabrielmot: Wayne 985: hat mean, kid? Robots can't be fancy? They're less than you? They all look alike to you?

You make me sick.

I think I smell a robot.


Maybe he can tell us about his mother.
 
2012-07-19 11:24:03 AM
img1.fark.net? No. And you're kid isn't the cutest thing ever. this goes for all of you parents. They're just not.
 
2012-07-19 11:25:26 AM
The Catcher in the Rye

"It doesn't really have a story."


How perceptive.
 
2012-07-19 11:26:11 AM
The Color Purple
"This book has to be about the color purple. I think it's a baby book. It looks like it would be very short. I think there must be a blob of purple that lives in that house. And the purple blob just stays in its home and is lazy..."

i2.kym-cdn.com
 
2012-07-19 11:30:19 AM

CavalierEternal: Kids are f*cking stupid.

If you see one, hit it with a rock.


a CRACK rock!
 
2012-07-19 11:30:31 AM

rufus-t-firefly:

This book is better than Atlas Shrugged.


That's actually VERY inspiring.. thanks very much for this link. I always wanted to write but worry that it'll come out poorly. There's no way I can write worse than that, and he's got three books out.

"Moon People" indeed.
 
2012-07-19 11:31:50 AM

olapbill: jaylectricity: I think it's a book about a haunted theme park

What kind of six-year-old calls it a theme park? Wouldn't she have said Haunted House or something like that? I wonder if the author just made these up and pretended it was her daughter.

one who watches Scooby and Co in reruns.


www.brainspill.huntfamilywebsite.com

WE ALL LIVE IN THE DISNEY"S HAUNTED HOUSE> DISNEY"S HAUNTED HOUSE. DISNEYS HAUNTED HOUSE!!

(to the tune of Yellow Submarine)
 
2012-07-19 11:32:25 AM
Am I the only one who read the minimum of "literature" in school and never a word more of that shiat? Or just I'll admit it.
 
2012-07-19 11:37:01 AM
FTA: "It doesn't really have a story. The cover is weird. It doesn't give you like any clue to what it is about on the cover, like other books do. "

Is her mom sure she didn't read these?
 
2012-07-19 11:40:21 AM
That kid is in for a treat when she finds out what Animal Farm and Lord Of the Flies are really about.
 
2012-07-19 11:42:18 AM

ciderczar: That kid is in for a treat when she finds out what Animal Farm and Lord Of the Flies are really about.


Animal Farm - place to have sex with animals
Lord Of The Flies - like LOTR except with flies instead of rings
 
2012-07-19 11:44:12 AM

zookrew: The Color Purple
"This book has to be about the color purple. I think it's a baby book. It looks like it would be very short. I think there must be a blob of purple that lives in that house. And the purple blob just stays in its home and is lazy..."

[i2.kym-cdn.com image 150x134]


Not only that but she already knows that stripey shirts are the distinguishing feature of Frenchmen.
 
2012-07-19 11:44:12 AM

Posh Naranek: Am I the only one who read the minimum of "literature" in school and never a word more of that shiat? Or just I'll admit it.


Same here. What would be considered great literature I left in high school/college. My readings mostly consists of Terry Pratchett and Fark.
 
2012-07-19 11:46:19 AM

Jon iz teh kewl: ciderczar: That kid is in for a treat when she finds out what Animal Farm and Lord Of the Flies are really about.

Animal Farm - place to have sex with animals
Lord Of The Flies - like LOTR except with flies instead of rings


Oohaar
 
2012-07-19 11:49:07 AM

ciderczar: Not only that but she already knows that stripey shirts are the distinguishing feature of Frenchmen.


Damn Warner Brothers cartoons!
 
2012-07-19 11:58:59 AM

MAYORBOB: The Catcher in the Rye

"It doesn't really have a story."

How perceptive.


She nailed that one.
 
2012-07-19 12:01:38 PM
they say ignorance is bliss, and i agree. while literature ruined my childhood, she can just keep making up stupid stories based on the cover instead of finding out the harsh truths like clockwork has rape rape and in animal farm, boxer doesn't go away to another farm...

/for the sake of kids everywhere, 'where the red fern grows' is a ridiculously boring story of a plant
 
2012-07-19 12:05:58 PM

ZAZ: how does one explain James Joyce's Ulysses to a six-year-old?

How does one explain it to an adult?


It's about one day in the life of an ordinary man in Dublin, and how his day parallels the adventures of Ulysses in The Odyssey.

/Pretty simple, really.
 
2012-07-19 12:17:24 PM

divgradcurl: /for the sake of kids everywhere, 'where the red fern grows' is a ridiculously boring story of a plant


and Old Yeller is a tedious biography about Abraham Simpson
 
2012-07-19 12:19:58 PM
Wow, this kid could have saved me a lot of trouble in high school when I struggled over my essay on Charlotte Bronte. My classmates swooned over the gothic romance, but I was bored to tears.

Jane Eyre: "This is about a girl that goes mining. I don't know why, but she looks like she would go mining, mining for gold. "

Or, in the common parlance of our times, "that bi**h ain't nothin' but a golddigger." Sums it up quite nicely.
 
jtr
2012-07-19 12:30:20 PM
So the kid's mom say they spend a lot of time in bookstores. When? 1964? Those covers are ancient! I dare you to go to Chapters (Canada) and find many of these with those old school covers.
 
2012-07-19 12:41:38 PM

schattenteufel: I want to read a book about a zebra that wears pants.


"Holy crap! Its a zebra with pants! Why is he fishing for aces??"
 
2012-07-19 12:41:43 PM

jtr: So the kid's mom say they spend a lot of time in bookstores. When? 1964? Those covers are ancient! I dare you to go to Chapters (Canada) and find many of these with those old school covers.


Used bookstores, perhaps?

And these were hilarious. I can't stand kids in person, but I admit that their naïveté can be adorable.

My favorite:

Jane Eyre

"This is about a girl that goes mining. I don't know why, but she looks like she would go mining, mining for gold. "

Indeed.
 
2012-07-19 12:44:39 PM
This whole thing feels fake to me. Fake fake fakity fake.
 
2012-07-19 12:45:45 PM
The Catcher in the Rye

"It doesn't really have a story"


Smart kid.
 
2012-07-19 12:51:42 PM
On The Road: The guy on the cover is a teen, he likes to drive people places a lot. And he's French."

Holy crap, this is amazingly close to accurate.
 
2012-07-19 12:52:20 PM

jtr: So the kid's mom say they spend a lot of time in bookstores. When? 1964? Those covers are ancient! I dare you to go to Chapters (Canada) and find many of these with those old school covers.


As a professional book dealer who gets a most of his inventory from thrift stores I have to agree. I think The Great Gatsby, Atlas Shrugged, and Catch 22 are the current covers, but cover art has seldom had anything to do with the story but instead reflects a metaphor of the story. At least by the third or fifth reprint, when someone has sent the author an idea for a more metaphorical image.
 
2012-07-19 12:55:14 PM

yourdogwantsplacenta: This whole thing feels fake to me. Fake fake fakity fake.


You strike me as the sort of person who can't fap to a picture without worrying about whether or not the model's breasts are real.
 
2012-07-19 01:26:19 PM
Meh. Not everything a child does is adorable.

And I would bet there are lots more imaginative kids who could make up better stories to go with the pictures. This was just boring.
 
2012-07-19 01:36:05 PM
or that George Orwell's Animal Farm is not a book for children.

My dad would disagree. I think my sister was 8 (to my 12) when that was our evening reading session book.


/we did a lot of classics for those
 
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