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(Tampa Bay Online)   Really dude, if you flew all the way from Arizona to Tampa to have sex with wheelchair-bound, 14-year-old girl who bought your ticket with Grandma's credit card, the least you could do is shave   (www2.tbo.com) divider line 57
    More: Florida, Tampa, Tampa International Airport, airport police, credit cards, Hillsborough County, airline ticket  
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29953 clicks; posted to Main » on 17 Jul 2012 at 6:40 AM (2 years ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



Voting Results (Funniest)
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest


Archived thread
2012-07-17 03:17:16 AM  
11 votes:
I thought meals on wheels came to you.
2012-07-17 12:35:21 AM  
8 votes:
Ironically, he will soon find himself in the position he intended for his victim: sexually assaulted and unable to walk.
2012-07-17 12:24:07 AM  
7 votes:
"Why don't you take a cue from your intended target and have a seat...right over there..."
2012-07-17 02:06:50 AM  
6 votes:

dickfreckle: Seriously, I'd rather stay home and jerk off.


Seriously.

500memes.com
2012-07-17 08:29:14 AM  
5 votes:
A girl in wheelchair is out on a dock crying and a jogger runs past and asks what is wrong. She replies I am 14 years old and have never been kissed. He kisses her and runs away. Two weeks later he sees her out there crying again. He asks what is wrong. She replies I am 15 years old now and have never been f*cked. He pushes her wheelchair off the dock into the water and says you are f*cked now.
2012-07-17 08:00:16 AM  
4 votes:

hobblekitty: Also, not to blame the victim but is she mentally disabled as well as physically? I mean she must have known dear ole Granny was going to see the charges on her credit card bill. Or perhaps she just didn't care?


She's 14. That's about as mentally disabled as you can get.
2012-07-17 07:34:53 AM  
4 votes:

miss diminutive: Diogenes The Cynic: Think about it...he couldn't afford the ticket to get all rapey with a 14 year old girl. It kinda makes me wish prostitution (of adults) were legalized for people like him.

I don't think legalized prostitution would have helped much in his case. He was clearly willing to break the law to fly to Florida to fark a 14 year old girl, something tells me he wouldn't have given much thought to being caught with a prostitute in his home town.

He's just a perv who gets off on underaged, disabled girls.

/prostitution should be legalized though, just not for the likes of him


Why can't he just pay $10 for a girl half way around the world to poop in the sink in front of her webcam like the rest of us civilized adults.
2012-07-17 07:56:59 AM  
3 votes:
Jim Gaffigan is looking rough these days
2012-07-17 12:11:44 AM  
3 votes:
The real news story here is that it really was a teenager, not just some FBI guy in his 40's.
2012-07-17 10:33:30 AM  
2 votes:

Flakeloaf: Diogenes The Cynic:

Compare that to a scientist, like Dawkins talking about religion.

Richard Dawkins is a condescending blowhard who seeks nothing more than to replace one brand of ignorant disdain with another. If he is a scientist then I am a vegetable drinking straw.


3.bp.blogspot.com
Who loves you? And who do you love?!!
2012-07-17 09:40:58 AM  
2 votes:
I prefer Fluttershart, the pony with the digestive issues.
2012-07-17 09:37:09 AM  
2 votes:

dickfreckle: I've done lots of stupid things in the pursuit of getting laid, but flying nearly cross-country? Maybe if it were 1999, when air travel was still easy. But these days with the dick-touching and the hours of security theater followed by surly service and the inevitable fat chick taking up half your own seat?

Seriously, I'd rather stay home and jerk off.


But, you see, you don't have to actually fly. You just need to go through security and have an open mind.
2012-07-17 08:51:10 AM  
2 votes:
This story screams for the elusive Florizona tag.
2012-07-17 08:50:49 AM  
2 votes:

JWideman: You can't prove that invisible pink unicorns do not exist. You can't prove that they aren't very spiritual beings (and they must be, to be both pink and invisible). And you can't prove that they are not pink. You now have no choice but to acknowledge they do exist, and give them the worship they deserve.


HERETIC!!!

The Unicorn is PURPLE!

PURGE THE HERETIC!


images.wikia.com
2012-07-17 08:41:36 AM  
2 votes:
Control + F ...insert "vegetable.....= "not found"....

Le Sigh......Come *ON* Fark.....


Q: What's the most difficult thing about eating vegetables?
A: Getting them out of the wheelchair.


/bah dah BIN...oh the hell with it.
2012-07-17 07:03:57 AM  
2 votes:
They're only mad because he made HER buy the tickets. A gentleman always pays his own way across the country to take advantage of children.
2012-07-17 04:05:53 PM  
1 votes:
It seems like it would have been slightly easier and less risky if he'd just taken a job as assistant coach on the Penn State football team.
2012-07-17 02:10:17 PM  
1 votes:
Wow. This thread has grammar nazism, pedophilia, ephebophila, religion, and ponies. Fark is king at multitasking.
2012-07-17 01:02:20 PM  
1 votes:
I knew you were waiting for this, so here goes:

deportesmediaticos.files.wordpress.com
2012-07-17 11:57:23 AM  
1 votes:
armored pony?
i42.tinypic.com
must work
not post more ponies
must work
not post more ponies
must w
images4.wikia.nocookie.net
2012-07-17 11:36:15 AM  
1 votes:

Nappy Imus: doglover: Nappy Imus: its still in the dictionary, so guess what that makes it :D

Errata!

Error in Store 103. . .


content7.flixster.com
Errahhhh, erraaaaah.....
2012-07-17 11:25:38 AM  
1 votes:

BronyMedic: serial_crusher: BronyMedic: /yes. I used ephlebophile I would hate for FARK's pedophile apologist brigade to get on to me for confusing their fine, upstanding group of people with these scumbags.

Look out for the grammar nazis though. The word you're looking for is ephebophile.

Thanks. I disabled my spellcheck on the iphone because every time I'd try to type a medical word, it'd turn it into something abstract and/or sexual.


lol - Sorry to all the religion debaters, but if we're going to threadjack, I'd rather
hear more about BronyMedic's (and others) iPhone substitutions for medical words.

ex. Just the other day I noticed a medical document where every instance of
'epithelial cells' had been changed to Episcopal cells... and I don't know
about you, but I didn't even realize those churches would lock people up.

/Oops, using that example will bring back the religion debaters in force...

//
imgs.xkcd.com
2012-07-17 11:00:57 AM  
1 votes:
i.imgur.com
2012-07-17 10:58:54 AM  
1 votes:

Fubar: 33? Holy crap that's a hard 33....


That's exactly how he woed her. "I'm a HARD....thirty three." after that, she pretty much HAD to use grandma's credit card.
2012-07-17 10:51:05 AM  
1 votes:

Flakeloaf: Diogenes The Cynic:

Compare that to a scientist, like Dawkins talking about religion.

Richard Dawkins is a condescending blowhard who seeks nothing more than to replace one brand of ignorant disdain with another. If he is a scientist then I am a vegetable drinking straw.


img16.imageshack.us
2012-07-17 10:45:03 AM  
1 votes:

BronyMedic: AverageAmericanGuy: She's stuck in a wheelchair. She knows she doesn't have the chance at a normal life. It's why SHE bought the airplane tickets for him.

I'm not condoning a 33 year old guy porking a 14 year old girl, but let's not try to pretend like she is completely innocent here.

Kind of blaming the victim here, aren't you?

I guess if women didn't dress like they wanted it, they wouldn't get raped either, right?


a white knight was last seen roaming fark

also:
halloftheblackdragon.com
2012-07-17 10:08:45 AM  
1 votes:
This thread has it all. Arizona and Florida, pedos, a teenage, an argument about irregardless, ponies, cripple jokes and science vs religion.

Its like a conversation with my mom.
2012-07-17 09:43:09 AM  
1 votes:

BronyMedic: MythDragon: Is she a victim is she is paying for a guy to come fark her? It kinda sounds like she wanted it.

She didn't pay for him to come fark her. She stole a credit card, and stole money to get the guy there.

It's called grooming. The predator conditions and "trains" his or her victim to accept and further their advances.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Child_grooming


Well that explains a lot. See I started a new business. I see all those dog grooming places, and I thought "How come no one does that for kids?" So I started up a service where you could drop off your children, and I'd wash and shampoo them, treat them for fleas, express their anal glands (if needed) and cut their hair into whatever cute design you wanted. When people asked what I did, I told them "I'm a child groomer" Now I know why I got weird stares. They probably thought I was doing something strange.
2012-07-17 09:42:00 AM  
1 votes:

Pathman: tankjr: bim1154: Ugly, fat, old and complete idiots. I just don't understand their thinking that they would have anything remotely to offer any woman

I can't decide if you're lonely, stupid or just an asshole.

did i miss something? what's wrong with what he said?


I was wondering the same thing, but this is fark so I just move on.
2012-07-17 09:18:37 AM  
1 votes:

Uncle Tractor: JWideman: and you've never seen Passion of the Christ yet?? watch that. and you might LEARN something

You mean it's full of invisible pink unicorns? I did not know this. I've learned something already.

On the topic of minors and unicorns and higher powers; I read some of the Christian texts that weren't included in the bible a couple of days ago. One of them was the Infancy Gospel of Thomas (google it). Apparently, when Jesus was a little kid, he went around killing other kids. Regular little Damien.


like father like son
2012-07-17 09:18:07 AM  
1 votes:
What? Bronies in a pedo thread? No way!
2012-07-17 09:14:07 AM  
1 votes:
Also, I apologize profusely for inadvertently turning this into a pony thread.
2012-07-17 09:13:57 AM  
1 votes:
"What the f*ck, guys, it's like Make-A-Wish, I'm making this chick's dream come true. You'd be A-OK with it if she wanted to meet a celebrity. Instead she wants to get boned by an ugly old guy from across the country. Who are you do deny this girl's dreams?"
2012-07-17 09:02:43 AM  
1 votes:

Jon iz teh kewl: JWideman: JokerMattly: Uncle Tractor: Diogenes The Cynic: Atheism may be a valid philosophical position, but science doesn't have the tools to deal with metaphysical truths.

What "metaphysical truths?"

Science has no way of proving there is a God, any more than it has the tools to disprove the existance of a God. Even with a fundamental understanding of every basic truth of the Universe, we are still incapable of ruling out the existence of a higher power. The absence of evidence, is not evidence of absence; we may simply lack the proper tools to perceive what we wish to study.

You can't prove that invisible pink unicorns do not exist. You can't prove that they aren't very spiritual beings (and they must be, to be both pink and invisible). And you can't prove that they are not pink. You now have no choice but to acknowledge they do exist, and give them the worship they deserve.

and you've never seen Passion of the Christ yet?? watch that. and you might LEARN something


Learn what?
That a murderous bloody fable is a metaphor?

/Or maybe that a creepy dude who flew to Florida to fark a wheelchair-bound 14-year-old is a martyr for my sins? He got arrested so I don't have to? All I have to do is accept Him as my savior and I'll be washed of the guilt of wanting to fark 14-year-olds? Sounds excellent.
2012-07-17 08:56:22 AM  
1 votes:
How many Vietnam vet's does it take to screw in a light bulb?....

3, one to hold the light bulb and 2 to spin the wheelchair.
2012-07-17 08:56:13 AM  
1 votes:

BronyMedic: Raharu: JWideman: You can't prove that invisible pink unicorns do not exist. You can't prove that they aren't very spiritual beings (and they must be, to be both pink and invisible). And you can't prove that they are not pink. You now have no choice but to acknowledge they do exist, and give them the worship they deserve.

HERETIC!!!

The Unicorn is PURPLE!

PURGE THE HERETIC!

[images.wikia.com image 850x612]

Goddamnit.

-sigh-

This is now a pony thread.


fim.413chan.net
2012-07-17 08:54:18 AM  
1 votes:

BronyMedic: Raharu: JWideman: You can't prove that invisible pink unicorns do not exist. You can't prove that they aren't very spiritual beings (and they must be, to be both pink and invisible). And you can't prove that they are not pink. You now have no choice but to acknowledge they do exist, and give them the worship they deserve.

HERETIC!!!

The Unicorn is PURPLE!

PURGE THE HERETIC!

[images.wikia.com image 850x612]

Goddamnit.

-sigh-

This is now a pony thread.


images.bluegartr.com
2012-07-17 08:52:10 AM  
1 votes:

Diogenes The Cynic:
Atheism may be a valid philosophical position, but science doesn't have the tools to deal with metaphysical truths.


I just rode a unicorn across a rainbow. Prove I didn't.

Funny how that works, isn't it?
2012-07-17 08:48:08 AM  
1 votes:

BronyMedic: Wow. The ephlebophilic predators are getting desperate. Of course, this really should surprise no one, considering one of the prime targets of predators and sexual abusers are disabled children, teens, and adults. Far easier for them to control and keep quiet.

There is a staggering amount of victimization that pediatric and adolescent disabled boys and girls recieve, and goes unreported.

/yes. I used ephlebophile I would hate for FARK's pedophile apologist brigade to get on to me for confusing their fine, upstanding group of people with these scumbags.



My girlfriend called me an ephlebophile once. I told her that was a really big word for a 12-year-old.
2012-07-17 08:46:37 AM  
1 votes:
A pedo who can't even find a kid in his own state. So is he a double fail criminal?
2012-07-17 08:44:08 AM  
1 votes:

JokerMattly: Uncle Tractor: Diogenes The Cynic: Atheism may be a valid philosophical position, but science doesn't have the tools to deal with metaphysical truths.

What "metaphysical truths?"

Science has no way of proving there is a God, any more than it has the tools to disprove the existance of a God. Even with a fundamental understanding of every basic truth of the Universe, we are still incapable of ruling out the existence of a higher power. The absence of evidence, is not evidence of absence; we may simply lack the proper tools to perceive what we wish to study.


You can't prove that invisible pink unicorns do not exist. You can't prove that they aren't very spiritual beings (and they must be, to be both pink and invisible). And you can't prove that they are not pink. You now have no choice but to acknowledge they do exist, and give them the worship they deserve.
2012-07-17 08:43:04 AM  
1 votes:
Back when I was a kid, the molesters all followed an unspoken code of conduct. Doing kids in wheelchairs was considered wrong.
2012-07-17 08:33:02 AM  
1 votes:
It was funner when "irregardless" wasn't a word.


/yep, that one too
2012-07-17 08:30:00 AM  
1 votes:
So... was she hot?
2012-07-17 08:29:04 AM  
1 votes:

Uncle Tractor: Diogenes The Cynic: Atheism may be a valid philosophical position, but science doesn't have the tools to deal with metaphysical truths.

What "metaphysical truths?"


The ones we hold to claim are not self-evident. That all men are NOT created equal. That if the God from the Old Testament is to be believed to have existed, then we should be glad He is past the little tantrums He had that would make a 4-year old cringe. That if such a supreme being existed with such intellect, cunning eye and intelligent design, he also is possessed of a wicked sense of humor stating "Be fruitful and multiply" yet giving some men very small penises.

So it is God's fault this dude could not get laid and had to resort a early-teen, wheelchair bound gutter slut.
2012-07-17 07:43:43 AM  
1 votes:
Did anyone else notice the drop-down banner ad for the RNC?
2012-07-17 07:40:09 AM  
1 votes:

gilgigamesh: Ironically, he will soon find himself in the position he intended for his victim: sexually assaulted and unable to walk.


Is she a victim is she is paying for a guy to come fark her? It kinda sounds like she wanted it.

It's not like she told some stranger she was scared because she was home alone, and he said he'd come 'help' her. She knew full well what she was bringing the dude over for.

But seriously molester dude, what did you think was gonna happen? It's not like 14 year old girls have much time alone. She lives with her parents dumb-ass. In a wheelchair...in a cave....with a box of scraps.
2012-07-17 07:08:00 AM  
1 votes:

AverageAmericanGuy: untaken_name: They're only mad because he made HER buy the tickets. A gentleman always pays his own way across the country to take advantage of children.

Hey, it's the 90s. Women can pay their fair fare share.


FTFY
2012-07-17 07:07:27 AM  
1 votes:

serial_crusher: BronyMedic: /yes. I used ephlebophile I would hate for FARK's pedophile apologist brigade to get on to me for confusing their fine, upstanding group of people with these scumbags.

Look out for the grammar nazis though. The word you're looking for is ephebophile.


E-feeble-phile- A person with a sexual fetish for boning feeble or disabled minors they met through the internets.
2012-07-17 07:05:19 AM  
1 votes:

untaken_name: They're only mad because he made HER buy the tickets. A gentleman always pays his own way across the country to take advantage of children.


Hey, it's the 90s. Women can pay their fair share.
2012-07-17 06:59:40 AM  
1 votes:

Ed Grubermann: BronyMedic: AverageAmericanGuy: She's stuck in a wheelchair. She knows she doesn't have the chance at a normal life. It's why SHE bought the airplane tickets for him.

I'm not condoning a 33 year old guy porking a 14 year old girl, but let's not try to pretend like she is completely innocent here.

Kind of blaming the victim here, aren't you?

AAG is a sock puppet and a troll.


If you're alluding to my love of a hand up my ass, I...

I've said too much...
2012-07-17 06:58:49 AM  
1 votes:
33? Holy crap that's a hard 33....
2012-07-17 06:57:41 AM  
1 votes:
serial_crusher: BronyMedic: /yes. I used ephlebophile I would hate for FARK's pedophile apologist brigade to get on to me for confusing their fine, upstanding group of people with these scumbags.

Look out for the grammar nazis though. The word you're looking for is ephebophile.


Thanks. I disabled my spellcheck on the iphone because every time I'd try to type a medical word, it'd turn it into something abstract and/or sexual.
2012-07-17 05:05:07 AM  
1 votes:
Wow. The ephlebophilic predators are getting desperate. Of course, this really should surprise no one, considering one of the prime targets of predators and sexual abusers are disabled children, teens, and adults. Far easier for them to control and keep quiet.

There is a staggering amount of victimization that pediatric and adolescent disabled boys and girls recieve, and goes unreported.

/yes. I used ephlebophile I would hate for FARK's pedophile apologist brigade to get on to me for confusing their fine, upstanding group of people with these scumbags.
2012-07-17 02:24:49 AM  
1 votes:

SilentStrider: Who DOES this?
*clicks link*

Ahh.


meh
arizona ... this is normative. all you have to do is take one look at the people that they elect ...

Arizona. It's the new Kentucky!
2012-07-17 12:56:46 AM  
1 votes:
I've done lots of stupid things in the pursuit of getting laid, but flying nearly cross-country? Maybe if it were 1999, when air travel was still easy. But these days with the dick-touching and the hours of security theater followed by surly service and the inevitable fat chick taking up half your own seat?

Seriously, I'd rather stay home and jerk off.
2012-07-16 11:58:24 PM  
1 votes:
Who DOES this?
*clicks link*

Ahh.
 
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