Page Two Rules!

Just have 4 or 5 doubles in the bar before you board. As long a you remember to take a leak, you'll be good to go.

Airline service sucks because of one inescapable truth: there often is no viable alternative. Enough people will fly irregardless of the level of service that the airlines don't need to give a damn.

Having said that, one major reason why we've seen such a quick downward spiral is because so many people are conditioned to purchase the cheapest of any product. Quality and service are secondary concerns, if they're concerns at all. So when a discount airline drops their price, everyone else does as well because they know that people search based solely on price. You can't stay in business when competing against the discount carriers when your prices are similar but your airline has a superior level of service. Guess what eventually has to give.

Face it, airlines are the metro buses of the sky. The days of creature comforts died a decade or two ago.


/next trip to Europe will be on a cruise line route where they just need to get the boat back to the other side of the ocean

I have flown a lot over the years, and most of it has been good. Sure, I have had a torn bag or a suitcase that did not make my connection or was sent to the wrong airport, but I always got reimbursed for the bag and my luggage was always delivered to my hotel or home. And the only times I have ever missed a connecting flight was when the flight before was delayed a very long time. I always try to pad my connections with about 3 hours. I like to be able to get off the plane, walk for a bit, stretch by legs, and depending on the airport do some shopping. And even though it is expensive, it is often nice to sit down and have something to eat and have a beer.

As ferris bueller said if you have the means I highly recommend one N767RD at 220knots it's slower than airlines but somehow always gets me door to door quicker unless it's JFK to SFO

Calmamity: The worst thing about the airlines aren't the cramped seating, long delays, or lost luggage. It's the people on the planes

No. Wrong. The worst thing is all those things and many, many more.

Don't worry. I played a pilot.

/.,?

Rory Bremner: They built the station next to the power station you see there, which is the third worst eyesore in the country. It was a Country Life thing-do you know what the first one was?

Phill Jupitus: People! Public people! Working classes! Poorly groomed servants! The ill-bred ponies! That Blair fellow!

I haven't been in an airplane in years and don't miss it. If my relatives want to see me, they can get their butts into a plane and come see me for a change. I spent 25 years flying to see them. Now their kids are grown, they can come see me for a change.

bird girl: I've been flying every other week for the past two years for my job. Some obvious things have happened - stuck on tarmac, lost luggage, having the back of my seat kicked by children old enough to know better, etc. Overall I consider myself lucky.

The worst two things that have happened to me

1. On a red eye from LAX to JFK, within 10 minutes of the plane taking off the drunk idiot next to me fell asleep with his whiskey and coke in his hands and it spilled all over me, my seat, in my shoes, etc.

2. On a trans-Atlantic British Airways flight, we had three choices of meals. Everyone who ate one of the choices (including myself) got food poisoning. People were puking in plastic bags the entire way to New York. And then when we got to New York, people were puking on the floor in customs line. It was disgusting. However, I got a refund, a voucher, and 3 first class upgrades out of it.

/CSS

Ah yes. I had the lasagna.

skinink: Hell is other people.

Not 5 minutes ago I was talking with a co-worker about our weekend plans. He asked me where I planned on going fishing. (It's like a religion here)

Told him I was going to drop the boat in Lake Louise, run it up the channel to Lake Susitna, north into the muskeg, then down into the creek channels that drain into the Little Su.

He looked puzzled. "What fish are in that area?"

"None." I told him. "No people, either. Just bears and mosquitoes." I don't think he got the point.

_{/Mediocre tale, chap}

Dinjiin: Airline service sucks because of one inescapable truth: there often is no viable alternative. Enough people will fly irregardless of the level of service that the airlines don't need to give a damn.

Having said that, one major reason why we've seen such a quick downward spiral is because so many people are conditioned to purchase the cheapest of any product. Quality and service are secondary concerns, if they're concerns at all. So when a discount airline drops their price, everyone else does as well because they know that people search based solely on price. You can't stay in business when competing against the discount carriers when your prices are similar but your airline has a superior level of service. Guess what eventually has to give.

Face it, airlines are the metro buses of the sky. The days of creature comforts died a decade or two ago.


/next trip to Europe will be on a cruise line route where they just need to get the boat back to the other side of the ocean

That is so the opposite of 50 years ago. We didn't fly to Canada when we moved here (when I was a baby). We took a ship - the slow way, but so much cheaper AND you could bring all your stuff and the car too!

Window seat on an exit row, Kindle, half a Xanax, sip enough water to stay hydrated, but not enough so you need to pee, forego the meal and stay put unless you're going to mud yourself.

Gyrfalcon: . Because Home Depot cannot make costs and profits by giving you the same personal service that the costlier mom-&-pop hardware stores used to give.

They could make a profit just fine doing that. Indeed they could well increase their profit doing that.

Eddie Adams from Torrance: Apparently the worst thing about the airlines is all of the pedophiles on board.

Go on...

I don't know how "first-class" works, but in regular class you only get two beers and a glass of wine. It is not enough to put up w/ the little shiat kicking me in the back. I swear to gods, when I feel like ending it all... I'm just gonna grab that little farker's foot and use him to break open the cabin door.

Charlie Chingas: Sitting alone in an aisle seat, she slept during the night flight. But when she felt movement, she awoke, she said, to see a man and woman beside her engaging in (warning: graphic content) oral sex.

I call absolute, 100% bullshiat.

I had to look at TFA to see if that's how it was written. It's like warning someone you're about to hit them when your fist is 2" from their face. Nice editing job...



I gave you ample bracing time.

Random Bastage: I don't know how "first-class" works, but in regular class you only get two beers and a glass of wine. It is not enough to put up w/ the little shiat kicking me in the back. I swear to gods, when I feel like ending it all... I'm just gonna grab that little farker's foot and use him to break open the cabin door.

What airline is this? Unless you're visibly drunk the stewardesses usually won't cut you off.

This is why I fly decent airlines such as American; the price good if you do it right. This past tuesday we were delayed and diverted at DFW (American's hub) due to storms. When we finally got there I missed my connection. After getting some incorrect information, An agent at an otherwise empty counter asked where I was going and said "oh that flight left, let me fix that." and she gave me tickets for a flight leaving in an hour.

I went to the counter for that gate and my name was called to give me a boarding pass. But she quickly took the ticket back before giving it to me and said "let me get you a better seat." She handed it back: first class. Nice. First class in a 737 isn't much to scream about but it still makes a big difference in comfort for a tall guy like me, plus the little amenities are great. It made up for being very delayed getting home and I got a lot of reading done in comfort.

When I arrived at LAX my checked bag of course did not make it on to my new flight, which was expected. I went to the lost bag area and gave them the bag tag and they send it via courier the next day to my house.

While I was in line at the bag counter, this prissy little white girl was all upset that her bag got delayed and was freaking out because she had no clothes. I noted that "wal mart is open 24 hours!" but she didn't think that was good advice.

After she was done with the service rep, the rep said "we're sorry for the inconvenience." and as the girl left she mockingly repeated the phrase under her breath, which I thought was an incredible insult to the service rep who helped her sort out her problem. People like that who make the worst of every situation are the kind of people I avoid like the plague, and remind me of people in the article.

In the mean time I had struck up a conversation with a little old lady from Sri Lanka after I helped her get her heavy bags off the carousel, and she also had a bag or two missing due to the weather mayhem. She did not speak English very well so I helped her through the bag claim process. We had a great time and parted ways after I made sure she had gotten to her hotel shuttle.

I got home at 3:30 in the morning and went to work the next day, but was not upset at all, the delays were due to weather and there's nothing to do but go with the flow. People who take everything personally need an attitude adjustment. You know you've made it as a civilization when people take first world problems way too seriously.

And hats off to American for going out of their way the few times I've ever had trouble flying with them. They seem to suck way less than most of the other domestic airlines out there.

As someone flying across the Atlantic with my girlfriend soon, I'd like the know more about this bj in the seat option. Gotta find some way to pass the time.

I agree with the folks above who said that generally a flight experience is as miserable as you let it be. Admittedly, there can be crazy exceptions that push an experience over the top, but generally just shut up and read / listen to your headphones / work / watch a movie / do something that only impacts you to pass the time. Don't talk to anyone.

/exception -- hot chicks that have interesting enough stories to entertain me for a flight. Both of you out there may talk.

But I LIKE being a victim and crying about stuff until I get what I want.

what_now: Before the flight, she argued with Spirit counter clerks when she learned she had to pay $18 more so her 5-year-old son wouldn't have to sit by himself. When she said she was scared of pedophiles, the fee was waived and the boy was allowed to sit with his father.

Sitting alone in an aisle seat, she slept during the night flight. But when she felt movement, she awoke, she said, to see a man and woman beside her engaging in (warning: graphic content) oral sex.

I call absolute, 100% bullshiat.

Sounds terribly perilous.

When I fly discount air, I don't expect service to be any better than taking a bus. That it is usually better is a pleasant surprise.

Sudlow: Bring sufficient food of a type that will not bother everyone around you

A take out order of chicken tika masala is my preferred carry-on food.

what_now:
Sitting alone in an aisle seat, she slept during the night flight. But when she felt movement, she awoke, she said, to see a man and woman beside her engaging in (warning: graphic content) oral sex.

I call absolute, 100% bullshiat.

Me too... that's the kind of thing I would expect in first class.

I've never flown Spirit, but I can't imagine they aren't anything but the worst. Charging for both carry on and checked luggage is ridiculous.

Personally, if I have the choice, I'll fly Alaska. Best domestic flights I've had.

Gyrfalcon: But yes, if they did that and absorbed the initial cost, they could make a better profit.

It's one of the things that killed Tower Records, and that was always a problem for them in big cities. Here in Chicago, you could go to Tower or go a few blocks away to a few other stores where everyone who worked there knew their stuff. And the funny thing is, these were small indie shops. They made up for the cost of well qualified staff simply by the volume of sales they did, because they took on that cost.

harlock: This is why I fly decent airlines such as American; the price good if you do it right. This past tuesday we were delayed and diverted at DFW (American's hub) due to storms. When we finally got there I missed my connection. After getting some incorrect information, An agent at an otherwise empty counter asked where I was going and said "oh that flight left, let me fix that." and she gave me tickets for a flight leaving in an hour.

I went to the counter for that gate and my name was called to give me a boarding pass. But she quickly took the ticket back before giving it to me and said "let me get you a better seat." She handed it back: first class. Nice. First class in a 737 isn't much to scream about but it still makes a big difference in comfort for a tall guy like me, plus the little amenities are great. It made up for being very delayed getting home and I got a lot of reading done in comfort.

When I arrived at LAX my checked bag of course did not make it on to my new flight, which was expected. I went to the lost bag area and gave them the bag tag and they send it via courier the next day to my house.

While I was in line at the bag counter, this prissy little white girl was all upset that her bag got delayed and was freaking out because she had no clothes. I noted that "wal mart is open 24 hours!" but she didn't think that was good advice.

After she was done with the service rep, the rep said "we're sorry for the inconvenience." and as the girl left she mockingly repeated the phrase under her breath, which I thought was an incredible insult to the service rep who helped her sort out her problem. People like that who make the worst of every situation are the kind of people I avoid like the plague, and remind me of people in the article.

In the mean time I had struck up a conversation with a little old lady from Sri Lanka after I helped her get her heavy bags off the carousel, and she also had a bag or two missing due to the weather mayhe ...

Christ! Things must be getting bad if American Airlines are presented as the Good Guys. I've run up well over a million miles with the buggers, and hate them with a passion.
Fortunately, I can avoid flying these days.

Mock26: Page Two Rules!

Why did this make me laugh so hard?

Mock26: I like to be able to get off the plane, walk for a bit, stretch by legs, and depending on the airport do some shopping. And even though it is expensive, it is often nice to sit down and have something to eat and have a beer.

Welcome, paid troll for the airline industry.

Shopping at the airport was the giveaway you shill, nobody shops at the airport because they won't let you on to a plane with most of the crap you could buy at an airport.

/gee honey, maybe we should price check that La-Z-Boy recliner you wanted...AT THE AIRPORT.

I don't understand the hate for Spirit. I fly with them all the time, and it is perfectly adequate for what I contracted for. Ticket-transport. That's it. And they are always crazy to be on time, and usually are. I don't pack like an idiot, don't have to eat and drink every waking minute of my life, so I'm not looking for all this "service" crap. Just get me to where I'm going, and I'm pretty happy.

I have worked in customer service for 20+ years and I constantly see how companies chince on service but I also see how customers make really bad choices. When I leave my 9-5 I'm a customer at Best Buy or Sears or Outback Steakhouse. So I see things from the customers POV. I have listened to family and friends (and customers who I service) whine about the poor service they've received. Sometimes they got resolution, sometimes they didn't.

My feeling here is simple: if you continue to shop there, you've forefeited your right to biatch ever again. You've had a bad experience and either it wasnt so bad that it you were worried about it, or the store has some advantage in your mind (cost, location, services offered that can't be found anywhere else) that supercedes the shiatty service. That is the decision you have made that cost/location/whatever was more important then the service. If you really were worried about the service you wouldn't shop there. Yes there are exceptions where you have no choice, like dealing w/government agencies or whatever. but often you still have choices. There are several DMV locations near me but I go the one that is third closest. Why? It's small, friendly, never a line and its efficient. I recently renewed my DL in EIGHT MINUTES. I left my car, entered the mall where the DMV was located and was back in my car EIGHT MINUTES LATER.

and yes, I did say that there is a DMV in the mall in NJ.All stereoptypes begin w/a nugget of truth.

Anyway, back to my point: people often go for the lowest price at their own risk. Our competitors often underprice us and customers use that as a point to negotiate on price or snag some free swag or whatever. At some point I just cant go lower, and I tell them, "yes X competitor is going to give u a lower price, but their customer satisfaction is 20% lower then ours, plus we offer this, that and the other and they don't. So you will pay less, but you will get what you pay for" Sometimes this works, sometimes it doesn't.

When family friends whine about X company I usually find that either they have blown the incident out of proportion or are jsut an attention whore. And often its the same people complaining about X company, Y company and Z company. and you know what the common connection is? THEY ARE. They have no idea how to value service and quality vs price and I frankly dont give a damn...

Jerry Lewis predicted the future of air travel back in the early 80's.

Link

Link

They call it a baggage carousel because that's where your baggage is killed by the system.

Yeah, you should have to pay more to expect people to be nice and to treat you with dignity.

coco ebert: Maybe I just travel a lot and am relatively laid-back, but I feel like air travel is horrible if you let it be. Of course there are the times I've been stuck on the tarmac, or the person in front of me is rude, but I just figure that's farking life. It's not the worst thing in the world. Then again, I've never flown Spirit and I fly trans-Atlantic a lot so the service usually is better once you leave the American airlines. No offense, USians.

I bought a ticket today for $138 (plus $20 if i check a bag) for a 1,200 mile flight. I'll spend less than 6 hours (connection and security etc.) going to a place it'd take 20 hours to drive. It's not that bad.

TheBeastOfYuccaFlats: Jument: #2: That's an entirely different kind of flying, altogether!

That's an entirely different kind of flying.

That's an entirely different kind of flying.