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(Serious Eats)   On the lunch menu today at the SmugDouche food truck, we have the $666 Douche burger, Kobe beef with foie gras, lobster, caviar, gold leaf, then topped with cave aged gruyere and kopi luwak bbq sauce   (aht.seriouseats.com ) divider line
    More: Spiffy, Kobe beef, foie gras, food trucks, Photo of the Day, lobsters, douche bags, sauces, gold leaf  
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6899 clicks; posted to Main » on 12 Jul 2012 at 3:00 PM (4 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



Voting Results (Funniest)
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest

2012-07-12 03:27:40 PM  
2 votes:
Man, whoever gets to eat my dick after I die is going to get one finely massaged piece of meat. Enjoy that, fella, it took a lot love to make a dick taste that sweet.
2012-07-12 10:57:37 AM  
2 votes:

Vodka Zombie: Relatively Obscure: Kobe beef

So they're bullshiatting you right out of the gate.

Yep. I really wish we'd stop calling it Kobe beef here in America. It's getting farking embarrassing, and I lose any and all respect I may have had for a chef if I see it on a menu.


It's a little known fact that here in the US, it's actually named after Kobe Bryant

/and don't ask what part of the animal it is
2012-07-12 07:27:30 PM  
1 vote:

HotWingConspiracy: I dunno, I see it the other way around. Any cows raised in that fashion outside of Kobe should be labeled Kobe-style, and the actual Kobe cows are the real deal originals. I also fully acknowledge that if you never told anyone, they'd never be able to tell the difference.


If there were actual USDA rules about raising them the same way as real Kobe, they couldn't even get that. US ranchers are unwilling to not cut corners, because everyone wants the cachet of a name but no one will pay for it, so everyone loves defrauding themselves.

ReapTheChaos: Anyone who would pay $666 for a burger should be declared incompetent, have all their assets seized and distributed among those with the common sense not to spend $666 on a farkING BURGER!!


Why? They're handing over nearly one hundred times the real value of their meal to someone who will likely use the money better and get it circulating again. Parting fools and their money is the only way trickle-down actually works, but there are only so many fools that have money.

/Unfortunately, the truly rich figured that out too, and put their efforts into bankrupting the only sorta rich decades ago, since the middle class has nothing left to bleed.
2012-07-12 04:04:26 PM  
1 vote:

dickfreckle: Relatively Obscure: Kobe beef

So they're bullshiatting you right out of the gate.

Yeah, I'm not sure how many times it needs to be said before people will get it. It you order 'Kobe' beef in America, it is either smuggled or not actually Kobe beef (guess which one is 99.9% more likely). Legal, licensed restaurants do not advertise smuggled items on their menus, presuming one could even smuggle enough to supply the kitchen. Aside from $600 speaker cables, it's gotta be the most blatantly obvious rip-off that people willingly line up for.

I'm not saying the douche-burger isn't delicious, or that the beef used isn't of uncommon or even stellar quality. But it ain't "Kobe."


Yup. Even then, turning Kobe beef into a farking hamburger would be a crime against god. That's the reason they fatten up those cows like they do. So the meat will be perfectly juicy and marbled all the way through. Guess what? You grind it up like a hamburger and you totally defeat the purpose.

Morons, idiots and douchebags with too much money.
2012-07-12 03:53:53 PM  
1 vote:

MaudlinMutantMollusk:
It's a little known fact that here in the US, it's actually named after Kobe Bryant


No wonder they rape you price-wise.
2012-07-12 03:49:16 PM  
1 vote:

vudukungfu: Ned Stark: Yeah, and there's no such thing as champagne made in the US either.

There are no blowjobs after marriage.


Says you. My wife gives me extra money in my allowance for that.
2012-07-12 03:40:02 PM  
1 vote:

spentmiles: Man, whoever gets to eat my dick after I die is going to get one finely massaged piece of meat. Enjoy that, fella, it took a lot love to make a dick taste that sweet.


Okay, who ordered the pulled pork?
2012-07-12 03:39:13 PM  
1 vote:
i196.photobucket.com
2012-07-12 03:37:00 PM  
1 vote:

calm like a bomb: Can somebody tell me where I can get some of this delicious Kobe beef?


Try the new MacKobe with cheese at your participating MacDonalds.

Also, the bun is made of Doritos.
2012-07-12 03:30:18 PM  
1 vote:

JackieRabbit: calm like a bomb: Can somebody tell me where I can get some of this delicious Kobe beef?

Japan. If someone in the US tells you that the beef they are selling you is Kobe, they are lying. Kobe cattle are ritualistically grown only in a small areal around Kobe Japan and nowhere else. Very few cattle are grown each year and none of them are exported.


Really? We're this far into the thread, and you are the FIRST ONE to mention this!?!
2012-07-12 03:30:05 PM  
1 vote:
Japan doesn't even export Kobe beef. Apparently it's hard as fark to get it Japan, too. I'm not sure if this has been covered yet.

Oh well, off to get a Big Kobe Mac.
2012-07-12 03:28:55 PM  
1 vote:
Please I must make SuSu her medicine money!
2012-07-12 03:22:34 PM  
1 vote:
Can somebody tell me where I can get some of this delicious Kobe beef?
2012-07-12 03:20:02 PM  
1 vote:
Burger is nothing without Himalayan ketchup.

I can taste the Himalayas!!
2012-07-12 03:09:03 PM  
1 vote:
Looks good, but so fattening, what with the foie gras and all. It'll take another 26 minutes at the gym to work off all that.
2012-07-12 01:31:19 PM  
1 vote:
"I guess you think you're... you know, like an authority figure, with that stupid farkin' uniform, huh buddy? Working in a food truck, big farkin' man, huh? You know, these are the limits of your life, man. The rule of your little farkin' truck here. Here's your six hundred sixty-six dollars, you pathetic piece of shiat."

www.movieactors.com
2012-07-12 12:07:48 PM  
1 vote:
Still waiting for the $999 Herman Cain pizza.
 
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