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(Salon)   "Ten bands I will be forced to listen to in Hell." Yep, they make the list. Them too. Yep. Him for sure. Wow, even those guys?   (salon.com) divider line 365
    More: Amusing, Christie Brinkley, male pattern baldness, Pol Pot, Tommy Hilfiger, William Blake, Beatles albums  
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13420 clicks; posted to Entertainment » on 11 Jul 2012 at 12:46 PM (3 years ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



365 Comments   (+0 »)
   
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2012-07-11 12:24:07 PM  
List fails without Nickelback.
 
2012-07-11 12:32:13 PM  
Why not just link to the original article and not the format challenged Salon version?
 
2012-07-11 12:35:21 PM  
Whoa... That's a lot of whining in that piece.

"Oh look! See how cool I am because I hate all these inexplicably popular bands? Will you love me now? Looooooooooooove meeeeee!!!"
 
2012-07-11 12:42:45 PM  
Wow, the author sounds like a whiny hipster. How can you not like the f*cking Beach Boys??

Get off my lawn.
 
2012-07-11 12:44:29 PM  
Okay, which farker wrote that? It's the ultimate version of some douchebag coming into a thread just to tell everyone how much he hates whatever it is you like.
 
2012-07-11 12:49:42 PM  
List fails without Supertramp, for me anyway. I'm not a big Oasis fan, but when Wonderwall comes on I don't run away screaming. and I seriously don't get the Eric Clapton hate. I will call myself a fan of his even though I'm not wild about everything he's done.
 
2012-07-11 12:49:46 PM  
Hating is a thing for stans or squares
/or playing the ukulele
 
2012-07-11 12:50:13 PM  
The Beach Boys? REM? Really?
 
2012-07-11 12:50:43 PM  
I can see hating on the lounge-act Beach Boys who drilled "Kokomo" into our tympanic membranes for six months straight in '88, but not the Beach Boys who produced Pet Sounds, spurring the Beatles to top it with Sgt. Pepper's.
 
2012-07-11 12:51:40 PM  

Crewmannumber6: List fails without Supertramp, for me anyway. I'm not a big Oasis fan, but when Wonderwall comes on I don't run away screaming. and I seriously don't get the Eric Clapton hate. I will call myself a fan of his even though I'm not wild about everything he's done.


clapton really doesn't get the love he deserves
 
2012-07-11 12:51:52 PM  
The author of this piece believes that Brian Wilson does not have a shred of talent. Wow.
 
2012-07-11 12:52:12 PM  

xanadian: List fails without Nickelback.


Hell does have some standards and mercy.
 
2012-07-11 12:52:21 PM  
He hates things. He must be so cool.
 
2012-07-11 12:52:35 PM  

xanadian: List fails without Nickelback. Guided by Voices


ftfy
 
2012-07-11 12:52:47 PM  
Other than missing Fark's Public Enemy #1, Nickelback, that list sounds like every Fark music thread ever.

/You haven't heard of my favorite band. They're in the underground Cheyenne, WY scene.
 
2012-07-11 12:52:50 PM  
I farking hate Clapton. A boring douche listened to by dickheads.
 
2012-07-11 12:52:53 PM  
"since the day I turned eleven and inherited my uncle's Beatles albums, I've cared about music to the exclusion of all else. "

bah ha ha.. because nothing gives you more musical credibility than
listing a 50 year old pop act aimed at teen girls as a major influence in your life.
 
2012-07-11 12:53:14 PM  
My list (in no particular order):

Guns and Roses
System of a Down
Nickelback
Creed
Rihanna
Soul Coughing
Grateful Dead
Journey
Black Eyed Peas
Sammy Hagar/Van Hagar
 
2012-07-11 12:53:51 PM  

wiredroach: I can see hating on the lounge-act Beach Boys who drilled "Kokomo" into our tympanic membranes for six months straight in '88, but not the Beach Boys who produced Pet Sounds, spurring the Beatles to top it with Sgt. Pepper's.


The Beatles did no such thing. Sgt. Pepper sucked.
 
2012-07-11 12:54:17 PM  

Crewmannumber6: List fails without Supertramp, for me anyway. I'm not a big Oasis fan, but when Wonderwall comes on I don't run away screaming.


The guy in the room next to me in college used to listen to Wonderwall about fifty times a day at ridiculous volumes. It was the first thing I heard when I woke up in the morning, and the last thing I heard before going to bed at night. Not that there's anything wrong with the song itself, but it makes me rage to this day.
 
2012-07-11 12:54:20 PM  
Author is not a pretentious douche.
 
2012-07-11 12:54:28 PM  
So....much.....trolling...
 
2012-07-11 12:54:39 PM  
If the CIA were to torture me, they could play Eric Clapton and James Taylor on an endless loop, and I would tell them anything they wanted to hear to make it stop.
 
2012-07-11 12:54:55 PM  
That list completely fails without:
- Def Leppard
- Crash Test Dummies
- Barnie the Dinosaur
- Air Supply
- Hall and Oats
- Duran Duran
- NSYnc
- Warrant
- Poison

Other crappy pop music I don't know the name for and stuff you would hear in Kroger.
 
2012-07-11 12:55:29 PM  
i75.photobucket.com
 
2012-07-11 12:56:46 PM  

wiredroach: I can see hating on the lounge-act Beach Boys who drilled "Kokomo" into our tympanic membranes for six months straight in '88, but not the Beach Boys who produced Pet Sounds, spurring the Beatles to top it with Sgt. Pepper's.


Exactly. The comment that "every last song is ... cheap Hawaiian shirts, male-pattern baldness, and banal lyrics about cars" tells me that this dickhead knows absolutely nothing about the Beach Boys and their history.

/Smile, motherfarker!
 
2012-07-11 12:56:47 PM  
Article summary:
I am very pithy and funny. I hate everything you like; however, I preface my article by saying I'm a total asshole which totally justifies everything I say.

/How do you hate The Beach Boys?
 
2012-07-11 12:57:05 PM  
Yeah, except for Creed, that list is pure, maximum trolling. Hipster whining indeed.
 
2012-07-11 12:57:09 PM  
OMG!!! He's so funny and edgy....oh god, I wish I was so cool, like Sean Beaudoin..He's my new, most favoritest writer, because he, like, tells the truth about things and he is so good at channeling the "oh so cool" vibe that me and my generation have struggled to mete out to the world that doesn't understand out angst and...oh my god, i can't even keep typing, the tears are flowing so much.......help me Sean...help me...


/if douchebag has a writing style, TFA is it...
 
2012-07-11 12:57:15 PM  

AdolfOliverPanties: Soul Coughing


I hope you can see this, because I'm doing it as hard as I can.
 
2012-07-11 12:57:23 PM  
DNRTFA but #1 should be Los Del Rio.
 
2012-07-11 12:57:55 PM  

redpanda2: Crewmannumber6: List fails without Supertramp, for me anyway. I'm not a big Oasis fan, but when Wonderwall comes on I don't run away screaming.

The guy in the room next to me in college used to listen to Wonderwall about fifty times a day at ridiculous volumes. It was the first thing I heard when I woke up in the morning, and the last thing I heard before going to bed at night. Not that there's anything wrong with the song itself, but it makes me rage to this day.


I know that guy, I should have killed him when I had the chance.
 
2012-07-11 12:58:35 PM  
Author is an idiot. Let's move on.
 
2012-07-11 12:59:08 PM  
I understand that different folks, different strokes... but maaaaan does this reeks of annoying hipsterism...

/Likes at least 1 song of all those in the list...
 
2012-07-11 12:59:49 PM  
No Nickelback? No Coldplay? No Foreigner? Hell won't be as bad as I thought...
 
2012-07-11 01:00:41 PM  
That's a lot of pretentious douche in one article
 
2012-07-11 01:01:32 PM  
img696.imageshack.us

The author
 
2012-07-11 01:01:58 PM  
List fails without EVERYTHING that is on my sons Ipod. Good lord that kid has no taste in music!
 
2012-07-11 01:02:53 PM  
I kinda liked it.
 
2012-07-11 01:02:55 PM  
For a guy that's supposedly so schooled in all things music, the music that he hates comes directly from radio playlists. I am not a big music fan and I was able to catch every song reference he mentioned due to the radio. His arguments weren't even really coherent, he might as well as written the list as "Songs I Cannot Stand To Listen To Thanks To The Radio, by Musician"
 
2012-07-11 01:03:44 PM  
Oasis, Weezer, old man Clapton, and Pearl Jam? Whoa, I actually agree with this.
 
2012-07-11 01:04:21 PM  

gunther_bumpass: wiredroach: I can see hating on the lounge-act Beach Boys who drilled "Kokomo" into our tympanic membranes for six months straight in '88, but not the Beach Boys who produced Pet Sounds, spurring the Beatles to top it with Sgt. Pepper's.

The Beatles did no such thing. Sgt. Pepper sucked.


static.tumblr.com2.bp.blogspot.com
 
2012-07-11 01:04:41 PM  
My list:

- Christian Rock
- Musack
- Yanni
- Kenny G
- Any Kids Bop cover
- Christmas Music
- Songs written for anti-drug musicals for elementary school audiences preformed by 20 year old overly peppy rapping youth group

I think you get the picture. Because, the above list is pure hell. I know there is a lot of irony in a list of what I would hear in Hell, and have the first entry be Christian Rock, but listening to it is pure torture.
 
2012-07-11 01:05:17 PM  

xanadian: List fails without Nickelback.


Done in one.
 
2012-07-11 01:05:24 PM  

gunther_bumpass: "since the day I turned eleven and inherited my uncle's Beatles albums, I've cared about music to the exclusion of all else. "

bah ha ha.. because nothing gives you more musical credibility than
listing a 50 year old pop act aimed at teen girls as a major influence in your life.


Wow, you out-ignorant douched him with one sentence. Bravo!

I at least kind of like every band he listed except Creed
 
2012-07-11 01:05:36 PM  
Also, I suspect someone who can't find anything of value in Pearl Jam's catalog to be some sort of alien whose brain physiology bears little resemblance to that of a human.
 
2012-07-11 01:06:13 PM  
Something tells me this guy's idea of good music would make most everyone else's Album's of Hell list.
 
2012-07-11 01:06:20 PM  
That's some awful, awful writing.
 
2012-07-11 01:06:44 PM  
However, it does tickle me that in 30 years, nobody will know or care who Limp Bizkit was.
 
2012-07-11 01:06:50 PM  
What, no Nirvana? I goddamn hate that band.
 
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