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(Food and Wine)   Gene Simmons on life, love, music and dessert. Actually, scratch the first three: "God gave you two hands. One is for stuffing your mouth like a Christmas goose full of pastry, and the other is for molten hot coffee"   (foodandwine.com) divider line 42
    More: Strange, Food & Wine, desserts, coffee  
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2380 clicks; posted to Main » on 11 Jul 2012 at 2:18 PM (2 years ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2012-07-11 10:57:39 AM
He may be over the hill and washed up, but I will concede this: Gene Simmons still gives good quotes
 
2012-07-11 11:31:09 AM
He's not only over the hill and washed up, but he's been an asshole for so long that the only thing that comes out of his mouth any more is shiat.
 
2012-07-11 11:59:37 AM

Marcus Aurelius: the only thing that comes out of his mouth any more is shiat.


So he's worth a deuce?
 
2012-07-11 12:38:22 PM

Godscrack: Marcus Aurelius: the only thing that comes out of his mouth any more is shiat.

So he's worth a deuce?


Most Farkers won't get the reference, because as far as they know, KISS only made one song.......... "Rock and Roll All Night".

However, for a lifelong KISS fan, I say +1
 
2012-07-11 01:13:40 PM

Godscrack: Marcus Aurelius: the only thing that comes out of his mouth any more is shiat.

So he's worth a deuce?


At a minimum.
 
2012-07-11 01:38:23 PM
Molten hot coffee?

So like, liquid? He likes his coffee hot and liquid? What a rock monster.

Gene Simmons truly is one of the world's biggest assholes.
 
2012-07-11 02:21:22 PM

Calmamity: Molten hot coffee?

So like, liquid? He likes his coffee hot and liquid? What a rock monster.

Gene Simmons truly is one of the world's biggest assholes.


I was just going to point out the same thing.
 
2012-07-11 02:22:04 PM
Calmamity Smartest
Funniest
2012-07-11 01:38:23 PM


Molten hot coffee?

So like, liquid? He likes his coffee hot and liquid? What a rock monster.

Gene Simmons truly is one of the world's biggest assholes.


You sound like a fun guy yourself!
 
2012-07-11 02:23:49 PM
It should have been you instead of Ace, Gene.
 
2012-07-11 02:24:24 PM

Godscrack: Marcus Aurelius: the only thing that comes out of his mouth any more is shiat.

So he's worth a deuce?


You know your man is workin' hard.

/I lol'd
//funny'd
///smart'd
 
2012-07-11 02:26:10 PM
Yeah, an old man who's claim to fame is putting on clown make up and playing banal metal is any kind of wise sage of wisdom.
 
2012-07-11 02:28:51 PM
He has the tongue for it

To his credit, He did play a relentless terrorist who hid bombs and terrorists with guns in 55 gal drums all over Los Angeles.

/didn't say he did it well
 
2012-07-11 02:32:19 PM
I never paid attention to the guy but after his fresh air interview I'm certain of one thing. I can't stand him.
 
2012-07-11 02:32:33 PM
I listened to his autiobiography once. He would take a brief moment to mention various sweets and desserts he's had...

/Like Diana Ross' chocolate cake
//Oh my this just isn't getting anywhere out of the gutter, is it?
 
2012-07-11 02:41:06 PM
The music was good for the most part, but the best part about him is Shannon Tweed.
 
2012-07-11 02:44:38 PM
The main thing here is gene opened his mouth without shamlessly whoring some new shiatty KISS merch which is a first
 
2012-07-11 02:45:57 PM

Calmamity: Molten hot coffee?

So like, liquid? He likes his coffee hot and liquid?


I missed that, because I was trying to figure out why he liked filling a goose up with pastry.
 
2012-07-11 02:51:47 PM

wow just wow: The music was good for the most part, but the best part about him is Shannon Tweed.


Except when Shannon opens her mouth, then she reminds me of Kate Gosselin abusing Jon.
Not that either one or both of those guys were perfect angels.
 
2012-07-11 02:55:20 PM
Gene Simmons is a completely self-centered douchbag and doesn't deserve the fans he has. I have very recently started to respect Paul Stanley. Of course, not because of the music...


...because it's complete shiat.
 
2012-07-11 02:56:49 PM

verbaltoxin: I listened to his autiobiography once.


More proof KISS fans are illiterate.
 
2012-07-11 03:00:22 PM
Great, I just had to watch his stupid reality show/infomercial for some dumb therapist night before last, the last thing I want is to see more of him anytime soon.
 
2012-07-11 03:07:49 PM
I would lick his son.
 
2012-07-11 03:12:34 PM

solyhhit: Gene Simmons is a completely self-centered douchbag.


Perhaps, but he's completely shameless and open about it. I respect his lack of guile.

I've seen him in many interviews and it appears he uses the phrase "you're a powerful and attractive man" as a way of saying "fark you" to the interviewer. At least it seems so to me.
 
2012-07-11 03:43:19 PM

verbaltoxin: I listened to his autiobiography once. He would take a brief moment to mention various sweets and desserts he's had...

/Like Diana Ross' chocolate cake
//Oh my this just isn't getting anywhere out of the gutter, is it?


You must've had the abridged version!
I read his book and one of the main themes was "alcohol bad, dessert gooooooood"....I think 10% of the entire book was devoted to his love of dessert.

That demon ain't normal, I sez.

/but he does get lots of women....
//lots and lots of women...
///single-handedly kept Polaroid from going under for years, I hear.
 
2012-07-11 03:48:29 PM
Well to be fair, his second solo album was in fact called Asshole. So it isn't like any of us calling him one is breaking new ground or anything.

/Lt. Colonel in the KISS Army since about 1976 or so.
 
2012-07-11 03:51:17 PM
There is right now a crack-addicted 44 year-old woman standing outside an Oklahoma City truck stop offering any interested comers a handjob for $15. She has more of a sense of dignity than Gene Simmons has ever had.
 
2012-07-11 03:52:54 PM

AngryJailhouseFistfark: Perhaps, but he's completely shameless and open about it. I respect his lack of guile.


So you have no problem with the 'Yeah, I'm a shiathead, but at least I'm honest about it"?

Word to the wise, he's still a shiathead, it doesn't make him any less of one.
 
2012-07-11 04:00:44 PM

solyhhit: AngryJailhouseFistfark: Perhaps, but he's completely shameless and open about it. I respect his lack of guile.

So you have no problem with the 'Yeah, I'm a shiathead, but at least I'm honest about it"?

Word to the wise, he's still a shiathead, it doesn't make him any less of one.


I have no problem with the guy who's a shiat head and admits it. He's an entertainer. He entertains. He makes no pretense that he's some benevolent, charitable, noble, honorable, gentleman while being a douche when he's off camera/mike and out of the public eye. That's the sort with whom I have a problem.

The guy who comes right out and says, "here's my schtick, enjoy or change the channel", not so much.
 
2012-07-11 04:01:08 PM
 
2012-07-11 04:03:53 PM
DIAF Gene, you cockbag
 
2012-07-11 04:26:41 PM

DavidVincent: He's also a racist.


That's remark has nothing to do with race. Gentile means non-Jew (or non-Mormon if you are a Morman). It isn't specific to any race. Also, he's right - that IS what gentiles are for!
 
2012-07-11 04:50:08 PM

AngryJailhouseFistfark: I have no problem with the guy who's a shiat head and admits it.


Yeah, it's not like it was ever, "Breaking News! Simmons is an asshole!" From the beginning he's been obvious in his intentions, not all that common in showbiz. Maybe that's the appeal to Tweed, who I'm sure heard way more than her share of bs early on.

As musicians go, he's only average on the asshole scale.
 
2012-07-11 05:36:41 PM

solyhhit: Gene Simmons is a completely self-centered douchbag and doesn't deserve the fans he has. I have very recently started to respect Paul Stanley. Of course, not because of the music...


...because it's complete shiat.


Something, something, the above post has merit or some shiat, something...
 
2012-07-11 05:45:55 PM
I thought both hands were for all that money everyone's trying to steal from you, Gene.
 
2012-07-11 07:06:26 PM
I thought the article was about RICHARD SIMMONS. I came in here expecting a lot of homoerotic innuendo, but was confused by all the KISS references.

/next time I'll rtfa
 
2012-07-11 10:23:29 PM
Soooooooo much butthurt in this thread. It's like someone said Dennis Miller was funny.
 
2012-07-11 10:26:59 PM

AngryJailhouseFistfark: solyhhit: AngryJailhouseFistfark: Perhaps, but he's completely shameless and open about it. I respect his lack of guile.

So you have no problem with the 'Yeah, I'm a shiathead, but at least I'm honest about it"?

Word to the wise, he's still a shiathead, it doesn't make him any less of one.

I have no problem with the guy who's a shiat head and admits it. He's an entertainer. He entertains. He makes no pretense that he's some benevolent, charitable, noble, honorable, gentleman while being a douche when he's off camera/mike and out of the public eye. That's the sort with whom I have a problem.

The guy who comes right out and says, "here's my schtick, enjoy or change the channel", not so much.


Right, entertainer. Just like Limbaugh, but without the dignity.
 
2012-07-11 11:25:08 PM
I don't remember where I read it, probably in another Fark thread about him, but the best line I've ever heard about Gene Simmons is that he's the kind of guy who would've sold out his own people during the Holocaust.

Completely accurate, i'd say.
 
2012-07-12 08:48:59 AM
Which hand should I fap with?
 
2012-07-12 09:13:34 AM

Jumpin Jbot: I don't remember where I read it, probably in another Fark thread about him, but the best line I've ever heard about Gene Simmons is that he's the kind of guy who would've sold out his own people during the Holocaust.

Completely accurate, i'd say.


Based on his lifestyle and personality? Yes. Based on his actual thoughts and feelings about his Hebrew heritage? No. Wasn't his mother a concentration camp survivor? I would think that might make a wee bit o' difference there.

jeanwearinfool: after his fresh air interview I'm certain of one thing. I can't stand him.


Why, are you a humor-less feminist? That interview was the most awesome bit of non-trolling trolling of all time! He was absolutely, positively 100% dead honest with Terry Gross, and she completely failed as an interviewer to be professional. He was absolutely living up to his belief system and giving her parity with the rest of the world that he would gladly fark just because he can, and she had to go and take it personal. Barbara Walters may have given him a dead stare and moved on, but she wouldn't have tanked the interview because of one seemingly off comment!

That was actually a very enlightening interview.

MSFT: The guy who comes right out and says, "here's my schtick, enjoy or change the channel", not so much.

Right, entertainer. Just like Limbaugh, but without the dignity.


You forgot: Huckster, Shill, et cetera; the man does what he does for money and pussy and no other reason, and he is 100% transparent about it; that's why I don't get how Shannon Tweed could have suddenly acted so butthurt about his not wanting to marry her after so many years. He was clearly upfront with her that he did not, but she clearly wasn't as "liberated" as she wanted to believe. Inside of every feminist is an actual woman dying to get out.

myarsehurts: The main thing here is gene opened his mouth without shamlessly whoring some new shiatty KISS merch which is a first


Yes. Yes it would be.
 
2012-07-12 04:29:21 PM
All this venom; Is he a republican?
 
2012-07-13 12:00:04 AM

Buffalo77: All this venom; Is he a republican?


He's Jewish. Fark is a portmanteu of the German words Fahrt ("journey") and Reich ("empire"; Anglicizing the "ch" to "k" to maintain the hard "c" sound). Every day on Fark is a journey that brings the Fourth Reich closer to fruition.
 
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