If you can read this, either the style sheet didn't load or you have an older browser that doesn't support style sheets. Try clearing your browser cache and refreshing the page.

(Fark)   Can someone briefly explain what the Christian Scientists believe?   (fark.com) divider line 231
    More: Unlikely  
•       •       •

7830 clicks; posted to Main » on 11 Jul 2012 at 1:57 PM (2 years ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



231 Comments   (+0 »)
   
View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest

Archived thread

First | « | 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | » | Last | Show all
 
2012-07-11 09:34:40 AM
I doubt it
 
2012-07-11 09:35:12 AM
Jesus discovered science, so if the science isn't done by Jesus, it is witchcraft.

That wicked witchcraft.
 
2012-07-11 09:35:15 AM
They believe in stuff that supports their faith. As well as things that make them happy with themselves.
 
2012-07-11 09:36:05 AM

rostit: They believe in stuff that supports their faith. As well as things that make them happy with themselves.


So they are just like every other religion then?
 
2012-07-11 09:36:49 AM

will_2679: rostit: They believe in stuff that supports their faith. As well as things that make them happy with themselves.

So they are just like every other religion then?


probably. Accept for the Amish. f*ck those guys.
 
2012-07-11 09:38:59 AM
God did it.
 
2012-07-11 09:39:33 AM
I don't know, but they monitor the sh*t out of stuff.
 
2012-07-11 09:39:38 AM
They monitor things.
 
2012-07-11 09:40:11 AM
I'm more interested in wtf is up with the "Jews for Jesus" crowd. Walked past a place with that on its sign in NYC...maybe 7 years ago. I was (and still am) very confused.
 
2012-07-11 09:40:13 AM

I Said: I don't know, but they monitor the sh*t out of stuff.


GodDAMN it!
 
2012-07-11 09:40:24 AM
Yes, but as many times as it's been explained I doubt one more time is going to make any impression on you. You're just going to continue to think what you're already thinking.
 
2012-07-11 09:41:07 AM
Give all your money to Tom Cruise?
 
2012-07-11 09:41:36 AM
I wonder when they're going to start selling this on ThinkGeek.

upload.wikimedia.org

It sounds cool. The Mark Super VII Quantum E-Meter.
 
2012-07-11 09:41:58 AM

NeedlesslyCanadian: I'm more interested in wtf is up with the "Jews for Jesus" crowd. Walked past a place with that on its sign in NYC...maybe 7 years ago. I was (and still am) very confused.


I was too. Then a Jewish friend explained that she "hates them" because what they are are Christians just trying to convert Jewish people. Not sure if she's correct, but that would certainly make sense.
 
2012-07-11 09:42:15 AM

NeedlesslyCanadian: I'm more interested in wtf is up with the "Jews for Jesus" crowd. Walked past a place with that on its sign in NYC...maybe 7 years ago. I was (and still am) very confused.


That was a joke by one of the guys on the Howard Stern Show. Google Sal Governale and jews for jesus
 
2012-07-11 09:42:59 AM
And God said, LET THERE BE BOSONS OPERATING AT 125.3 GeV!

And it was good.
 
2012-07-11 09:43:59 AM

NeedlesslyCanadian: I'm more interested in wtf is up with the "Jews for Jesus" crowd. Walked past a place with that on its sign in NYC...maybe 7 years ago. I was (and still am) very confused.


They believe jesus is the mesiah, but still maintain their jewish identity. How hard is that to understand?
 
2012-07-11 09:44:05 AM

I Said: NeedlesslyCanadian: I'm more interested in wtf is up with the "Jews for Jesus" crowd. Walked past a place with that on its sign in NYC...maybe 7 years ago. I was (and still am) very confused.

I was too. Then a Jewish friend explained that she "hates them" because what they are are Christians just trying to convert Jewish people. Not sure if she's correct, but that would certainly make sense.


Maybe not.
A long time ago I knew a middle aged Jewish man who was a member (?) of this organization.
The fact that he was married to a devout Roman Catholic might have had something to do with this persuasion, ...who knows.
 
2012-07-11 09:44:50 AM

BunkyBrewman: It sounds cool. The Mark Super VII Quantum E-Meter.


I have no idea what that's for.

I want one.
 
2012-07-11 09:45:23 AM

Shostie: I Said: I don't know, but they monitor the sh*t out of stuff.

GodDAMN it!


YOU NEED TO MONITOR THREADS BETTER
 
2012-07-11 09:45:34 AM

BunkyBrewman: I wonder when they're going to start selling this on ThinkGeek.

[upload.wikimedia.org image 300x236]

It sounds cool. The Mark Super VII Quantum E-Meter.


does it blend?
 
2012-07-11 09:48:24 AM

I Said: NeedlesslyCanadian: I'm more interested in wtf is up with the "Jews for Jesus" crowd. Walked past a place with that on its sign in NYC...maybe 7 years ago. I was (and still am) very confused.

I was too. Then a Jewish friend explained that she "hates them" because what they are are Christians just trying to convert Jewish people. Not sure if she's correct, but that would certainly make sense.


Its more like, bugging your friends constantly to join your softball team. While its not an outright mission of them, they'd really like for everyone else to come along.

A Jewish friend's sister somehow fell in with them back in college.
 
2012-07-11 09:48:56 AM

NeedlesslyCanadian: I'm more interested in wtf is up with the "Jews for Jesus" crowd.


From what I understand, they're mostly ethnic Jews who have converted (or whose family has converted) to Christianity. Under Jewish Law they're still technically Jews, and some of them try to hold onto some Jewish traditions, but really they're just proselytizing Christians with a hook.
 
2012-07-11 09:50:23 AM
jewish girls are hot.
 
2012-07-11 09:51:13 AM

rostit: jewish girls are hot.


I can support this.
 
2012-07-11 09:55:32 AM

NeedlesslyCanadian: I'm more interested in wtf is up with the "Jews for Jesus" crowd. Walked past a place with that on its sign in NYC...maybe 7 years ago. I was (and still am) very confused.


The Wikipedia page explains their beliefs: "Jews for Jesus is a conservative, Christian evangelical organization that focuses on the conversion of Jews to Christianity."

F*cking weird as all hell.
 
2012-07-11 09:58:16 AM
I wouldn't have minded dating a Jewish girl.

But growing up in the deep south, there's not a huge Jewish population to troll for pussy.
 
2012-07-11 10:08:17 AM

sugarhi: NeedlesslyCanadian: I'm more interested in wtf is up with the "Jews for Jesus" crowd. Walked past a place with that on its sign in NYC...maybe 7 years ago. I was (and still am) very confused.

The Wikipedia page explains their beliefs: "Jews for Jesus is a conservative, Christian evangelical organization that focuses on the conversion of Jews to Christianity."

F*cking weird as all hell.


Why?

For the overwhelming majority of jews, its more an ethnic and cultural identity than it is a religious one. So it stands to reason that you will have some that have differeint beliefs than the traditional jewish faith.

Think of your serious jews as irish americans, only its st patricks day every day.
 
2012-07-11 10:09:52 AM
i don't see how their beliefs are any stranger than other sects of Christianity.
 
2012-07-11 10:20:02 AM

sugarhi: F*cking weird as all hell.


LOLwut?

How is that any more weird than Catholicism, Islam, Hindu, or any of the others? Talk about an incredibly ridiculous statement...
 
2012-07-11 10:22:39 AM

rostit: sugarhi: F*cking weird as all hell.

LOLwut?

How is that any more weird than Catholicism, Islam, Hindu, or any of the others? Talk about an incredibly ridiculous statement...


I find your statement fascinating.
 
2012-07-11 11:03:55 AM
Green?
 
2012-07-11 11:06:50 AM

Aarontology: i don't see how their beliefs are any stranger than other sects of Christianity.


They seem pretty mild to me, compared to Mormons or Calvinists.
 
2012-07-11 11:09:19 AM

rostit: jewish girls are hot.


Not a fan of anteaters, personally.
 
2012-07-11 11:09:20 AM
Christian Scientists are not Scientologists, by the way.
 
2012-07-11 11:10:06 AM
It's been a while but from what I remember:

Christian Scientists: a new religious movement (founded 1879, counts as "new" in the world of religions) which mainly seems to focus on spiritual healing as god is good and henceforth illness (and even death) aren't really real. Treatments for illnesses are done through prayer, not medical science. So far as believes go, they believe the King James Bible is literal, factual, history and that believers should strive to be Christ-like (while they cannot ever actually be Christ). God is not just the father but also the mother.

Jews for Jesus: a lot easier to find info online so I won't regurgitate it here but remember that for the first few years of its history, Christianity was a Jewish cult, the decision to allow gentiles into the Christian faith without making them follow Masonic law (decided at the Council of Jerusalem, ~50 CE) was a very controversial one.
 
2012-07-11 11:10:45 AM

I Said: Shostie: I Said: I don't know, but they monitor the sh*t out of stuff.

GodDAMN it!

YOU NEED TO MONITOR THREADS BETTER


Christian Science Lizard
www.mongabay.com
 
2012-07-11 11:38:32 AM
It's a pyramid scheme, the spiritual equivalent of Herbalife. Also, it is hung up on past lives. Just let it go man, just let it go.
 
2012-07-11 11:40:49 AM

logistic: rostit: jewish girls are hot.

Not a fan of anteaters, personally.


Jewish guys are hot too.

/anteater
 
2012-07-11 11:45:58 AM
Huzzah! To Jewish girls!

My first girlfriend when I moved to NYC called me her "Goy Toy" which I had never heard before. At the time I thought it was about the funniest thing I'd ever heard.
 
2012-07-11 11:50:22 AM

Timanous: Jesus discovered science, so if the science isn't done by Jesus, it is witchcraft.

That wicked witchcraft.


And althoooooooo I knoooooowwww it's taboooooo....
 
2012-07-11 11:58:01 AM
This went green? Why would mods want to create so much extra work for themselves?
 
2012-07-11 12:06:28 PM

Aarontology: i don't see how their beliefs are any stranger than other sects of Christianity.


Christians have the best sects
 
2012-07-11 12:46:06 PM

rostit: They believe in stuff that supports their faith. As well as things that make them happy with themselves.


They believe in stuff that supports their prejudice. As well as things that make them feel superior to others.


/better
 
2012-07-11 12:49:44 PM
STAND BACK! I'M GOING TO USE RELIGION!!
 
2012-07-11 12:51:49 PM

logieal: Green?


Admins are feeling troll-y today.

/should make for a fun thread
//*grabs popcorn*
 
2012-07-11 01:10:27 PM

I Said: NeedlesslyCanadian: I'm more interested in wtf is up with the "Jews for Jesus" crowd. Walked past a place with that on its sign in NYC...maybe 7 years ago. I was (and still am) very confused.

I was too. Then a Jewish friend explained that she "hates them" because what they are are Christians just trying to convert Jewish people. Not sure if she's correct, but that would certainly make sense.


She's right. Jews for Jesus is a group that uses Judaism as a sneaky "in" to convert Jews to Chrisitianity. Except they fool no one and are pretty much universally loathed.

I will say that most Jews confuse Jews for Jesus with regular Messianic "Judaism" and holds them in contempt as well, but this isn't entirely fair. In reality, this group is actually just a branch of Chrisitianity that teaches laws of the Hebrew Bible are still binding, so their services and practices are very similar to Judaism (and they do use the name, which is misleading) just with bonus Jesus. In many cases, they are Jewish people who converted Christianity, but not all of them. Although they are still Christian which means still comfortable with proselytising, their religion is about their religion and not about trying to convert Jews. If that makes sense.

Jews of Jesus is about converting Jews. Messianic Judaism is about practicing Christianity in a way that is just very confusing for Jews.
 
2012-07-11 01:24:35 PM
lacajanegra.blogia.com

Christian Science is the belief that if you watch a mysterious videotape and your telephone rings, Mary Baker Eddy will climb our of your television and kill you.
 
2012-07-11 01:51:25 PM
I see somebody watched that new hospital reality show last night.
 
2012-07-11 02:00:47 PM
I have no idea, but I'd guess it's something similar to the character in Hume's Dialogues Concerning Natural Religion. Philo is the skeptic, Demea is the faithful, and Cleanthes is the scientist who thinks that if you study something hard enough it will lead you to God.
 
Displayed 50 of 231 comments

First | « | 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | » | Last | Show all

View Voting Results: Smartest and Funniest


This thread is archived, and closed to new comments.

Continue Farking
Submit a Link »






Report