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(NBC Philadelphia)   Have you ever been so pissed at someone who cut you off in traffic you pulled a crossbow on them?   ( divider line
    More: Scary, road rage, deadly weapon  
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4042 clicks; posted to Main » on 11 Jul 2012 at 1:50 AM (5 years ago)   |   Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»

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2012-07-11 10:47:34 AM  
1 vote:

Noticeably F.A.T.: redlegrick: I drive the speed limit just to piss people off. Seriously, I do

Thanks for helping make the roads that much less safe for the rest of us.

How so? I obey the law. The law says the speed limit is 45, I do 45 (maybe 5 over). I don't get tickets, I can control my vehicle better, and chuckholes don't hurt as much or tear up the car I'm in less. I don't make myself a hazard, I leave a lane open (when I can) for you to pass, what's the problem? I've probably driven over a half-million miles since I started driving for pay (mid-80's). Only three accidents that I can say were my fault, and I haven't had a moving violation since 1994. I believe I make the roads as safe as possible.
2012-07-11 10:40:07 AM  
1 vote:
Why, yes, yes I have.

About fifteen years ago I was heading south on I-57 past Champagne Illinois when I hit some road construction. Now there must have been at least two or three miles of road closed down to one lane, before we came up on the guys working and two or three miles of road after that was closed off.

I had slowed down to the speed limit in the construction zone when this asshole in a big dick truck, you know the ones that have been lifted and have huge ass tires, starts riding my ass, honking flashing his lights. It is a construction zone with active work going on I'm not about to go tearing through there.

Anyway we clear the construction zone and I get over, but this retard keeps on my ass and keeps blowing his horn and flashing his lights, so I speed up. He keeps on me, we hit about 100, and he kept with me the whole way. I slow down and just pull over, he also pulls over, jumps out with a knife in his hands.

Well that weekend I had been hunting with a buddy of mine and just happened to have my crossbow in the car, I grabbed it quickly unlocked the case, loaded it, hit the power windows and just as I aim it him he sticks his face in my window. It was a classic look on his face of "Oh shiat!", he went running for his truck and took off.
2012-07-11 08:44:07 AM  
1 vote:

Ashtrey: Pathman: probably just wanted to see if the guy shat gold

A Lannister always signals his lane change.

and that's how we became friends
japery brings us all together
2012-07-11 02:56:36 AM  
1 vote:
Not quite.

My brother and I were going to a RenFaire in Boulder, Nevada in his jeep. It was early in the morning. We were practically the only people on the road. And we were obeying the speed limit. Then all of the sudden, this redneck in a pickup truck comes from out of nowhere, rides our rear bumper, starts honking his horn, and begins screaming curses at us like a goddamn banshee. He then passes us, steers his pickup truck so it's in front of us, and then sticks his heavily-muscled arm out of the drivers window, flexes his bicep and flips us the bird.

My brother and I just keep going at the same speed, ignoring the redneck. That only seemed to make him madder. He then starts to slow down and he won't let us pass. Finally my brother and I just decide to pull into a rest area and wait until the redneck goes away (We had forgotten our phones, so we couldn't call for help). He then does an 180, pulls into the rest area, gets out of the truck waving a hammer, and demands to know, "What is your malfunction?"

I opened the door and got out. I was wearing my RenFaire outfit. I play a character named "Hondo the Wanderer". Hondo is a 14th century pilgrim. Aside from my shoes (I can't find Medieval boots in size 15), my costume is very authentic, from the straw hat (biatch to get in 9 3/4ths) to my paternoster to my six foot long African ebony staff.

I go after him. The redneck throws his hammer at me and misses. He tries to get back into his pickup truck, but I stop that by ramming my staff through the windshield until the end hits his seat. The redneck then starts running away. I would've followed, but I'm not built for speed. I then pulled my staff out of the redneck's windshield and went over his pickup truck busting everything I could. After a few minutes of genuine catharsis, I got back into the jeep and my brother and I continued to the Boulder City RenFaire (which sucked terribly) without further trouble. .
2012-07-11 02:10:23 AM  
1 vote:
/What was that wrong?
2012-07-11 02:08:21 AM  
1 vote:

khonshu: Arcuballistua habeo. Nisi substantia omnes mihi dabis ad caput tuum saxum immane mittam.

Sorry, I spelled "arcuballista" wrong, and I got my projectiles mixed up.
It ruins the fun of being sagacious when I'm actually an idiot.
2012-07-11 01:56:49 AM  
1 vote:

doglover: RexTalionis: Crossbows are great weapons - easy to load, easy to fire, no training or upper body strength necessary, silent and it can go through armor.

Silent? Except for the godawful crack and subequent clicking of the winch.

Also aren't they a lot slower to load than just drawing and nocking another arrow?
2012-07-11 01:51:45 AM  
1 vote:
I don't even own A crossbow, much less many crossbows that would necessitate a rack.
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