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(Fark)   What unspoken rules in society drive you crazy when people don't follow them?   (fark.com) divider line 1417
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8424 clicks; posted to Main » on 10 Jul 2012 at 10:26 PM (2 years ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2012-07-10 11:14:19 PM
When your child does something wrong, don't get mad at the people who caught him doing it.
 
2012-07-10 11:14:30 PM
Stop right in the MIDDLE of a passageway to have a conversation with someone. Bonus if it is right inside/outside of a doorway.
 
2012-07-10 11:14:40 PM
When people talk in the bathroom.
 
2012-07-10 11:14:47 PM
When walking as a group, you don't own the whole sidewalk.
 
2012-07-10 11:15:18 PM

fortheloveofgod: angrymacface: If there are three urinals, DO NOT use the middle one unless the other two are occupied.

This applies for crappers too. Why in the fark do you come sit next to me in the middle stall when I am in an end stall and there is another end stall open???


Dude. My poop smells good. I love the smell, therefore you're an idiot if you don't. Duh.
 
2012-07-10 11:15:21 PM

Nothing To See Here: kevinatilusa: Don't bring politics or religion into a conversation that has no need for them.

That goes double for Fark threads.

God bless you, I wish the Democrats would listen to that advice


Disingenuous is as disingenuous does.

Ugh.

And p.s. to the haters: fark off and lie, for you will, and the M-particle will make sense of you all, in yer feeble attempts to squiggle...sad, sad squiggle. ;)
 
2012-07-10 11:15:53 PM

fortheloveofgod: angrymacface: If there are three urinals, DO NOT use the middle one unless the other two are occupied.

This applies for crappers too. Why in the fark do you come sit next to me in the middle stall when I am in an end stall and there is another end stall open???


Was it Larry Craig with his "wide stance"?
 
2012-07-10 11:16:11 PM

fortheloveofgod: angrymacface: If there are three urinals, DO NOT use the middle one unless the other two are occupied.

This applies for crappers too. Why in the fark do you come sit next to me in the middle stall when I am in an end stall and there is another end stall open???


That's a bit different. Depending on how disgusting Stall 1 is, the middle one might be the only option.
 
2012-07-10 11:16:16 PM
Write down my food order. Your amazing memory doesn't dazzle me...getting my meal correct is way more impressive.
 
2012-07-10 11:16:25 PM
Some of these are simple cases of other people not being polite. I can agree with that.

Others (like how others choose to eat their food or how they sit in a restaurant) are just mind-numbing biatching. Someone chews something you don't? Oooo, call the social police.

There are legitimate complaints and there's just biatching. Know the difference.
 
2012-07-10 11:16:55 PM

thejoyofpi: netizencain: Have a little situational awareness and move yourself out of everyone's way you bastard.

How about you have the situational awareness to realize someone has stopped in front of you and you should adjust accordingly?


Because that's not the way it works, you self-entitled jackwad.
 
2012-07-10 11:17:32 PM
A few people have mentioned it, but, getting "double teamed" on a 2 lane (in one direction) highway is the worst.

When you are in the left lane people, you pass.... even if you realize half way through "Oh, crap, I don't really want to go faster than this guy", you need to speed up, get around him, let the others in the left lane pass you, and then you can slow down and let the guy you just passed pass you. Don't sit going RIGHT NEXT to the guy in the right lane for 3 miles doing the same speed!
 
2012-07-10 11:18:06 PM
People that say something along the lines of "my brother/sister/mother/father/whatever is a retard/fag/whatever, so I'm allowed to say that word."
Take some responsibility for the shiatty things you want to say. Don't hide behind some excuse like it's going to get you out of people thinking you're a rude fark.

Also, people that say "I'm from *insert geographical location here, (usually Texas)*, so that means I *insert self-righteous comment here". The only people that give a shiat about you being a Texan are other Texans. Same applies to New Yorkers. What matters in life is what you do with it, not where you're from.
 
2012-07-10 11:18:16 PM
Turn signals are not just a convenience.
 
2012-07-10 11:18:23 PM

Mrs.Sharpier: Don't sit side by side in a booth, I don't give a shiat how "in love" you are.


You sound fat.
 
2012-07-10 11:18:29 PM

thejoyofpi: melaniethepanda: thejoyofpi: melaniethepanda: I had a woman run into me at the grocery and I said sorry, expecting her to then apologize and take the blame. Instead she said "It's fine."

I had a guy run into me on the sidewalk in New York and he said "watch yourself motherf*cker!" and I said "go f*ck yourself!" in return.

So at least your person was nice.

But that's New York.

This is the Midwest. She might as well have said to go f*ck myself.

I see. So basically

NYC: "GO F*CK YOURSELF, MOTHERF*CKER"
= Midwest: "It's fine, don't worry about it"
= South: "Bless your heart"


Yep. I promise you when my grandmother said, "bless you heart," she wasn't being nice...
 
2012-07-10 11:19:11 PM

MagnesDrachen: There are legitimate complaints and there's just biatching. Know the difference.


Tiggers and Eeyores dude. Tiggers and Eeyores.
 
2012-07-10 11:19:25 PM
Stand right, Walk left. Escalators and moving sidewalks.
 
2012-07-10 11:19:56 PM

BackAssward: Turn signals are not just a convenience.


They're not optional on new SUV's and BMW's? I just assumed they must be part of an uncommon option package.
 
2012-07-10 11:20:33 PM

cowgirl toffee: If you're riding in my car, DO NOT touch the radio.


You have radio stations worth listening to, lucky : )
 
2012-07-10 11:20:37 PM

Kyro: Taking $300 of groceries through the self check-out. Goddamn you.


This is usually written. And everyone who does this in the express self checkout wants to beat this guy with a sack of hammers... at least the Freddy Kroger figured out how to set a hard limit on the machine.
 
2012-07-10 11:21:04 PM
Hey, Asshole! Don't stand in the middle of the doorway!
 
2012-07-10 11:21:36 PM
Don't feed a Mogwai after 12... dunno which time zone is referenced.


/Also no water, guess we want to dehydrate the farkers to death or something :/
 
2012-07-10 11:21:51 PM

LineNoise: Grown adults should not be splitting a check in an itemized fashion. If there are 4 of you, and the total is $100, you each put in $25


Normally I would totally agree, but I can't stand getting food and drinks with friends and you end up NOT getting the pricey drink and get none of the appetizers but still have to pay up for all of that stuff. It may be nit-picky, but when you're somewhere like Vegas and your wallet seems to empty out faster than your gas tank on a race track, it gets a little annoying.
 
2012-07-10 11:22:15 PM

netizencain: Dad's don't need to go to their kid's friends birthday parties. My grandfather didn't do it. My father didn't do it. And sure-as-shiat, I can't see why I have to go to the birthday party of some 6 year old that I'm not related. Hell, I barely want to go to my own kid's party.

A recent survey amongst my 'dad' friends indicates that this is a commonly held believe but most of them lack the balls to tell their wives, "No. Ahh, hell no. Count me out."

So don't ask. You put me on the spot of having to be a dick


What if there's beer?
 
2012-07-10 11:22:30 PM

TrixieDelite: Because that's not the way it works, you self-entitled jackwad.


It is for a lot of people.
 
2012-07-10 11:22:41 PM
NYC: "GO F*CK YOURSELF, MOTHERF*CKER"
= Midwest: "It's fine, don't worry about it"
= South: "Bless your heart"

Yep. I promise you when my grandmother said, "bless your heart," she wasn't being nice...


Is that you, Henry Cho?
 
2012-07-10 11:22:44 PM

KingoftheCheese: Mrs.Sharpier: Don't sit side by side in a booth, I don't give a shiat how "in love" you are.

My wife and I sit side by side at restaurants.


You and your wife are idiots.
 
2012-07-10 11:22:57 PM

Ball Zitch: Also, people that say "I'm from *insert geographical location here, (usually Texas)*, so that means I *insert self-righteous comment here". The only people that give a shiat about you being a Texan are other Texans. Same applies to New Yorkers. What matters in life is what you do with it, not where you're from.


If it helps, if you're from Buffalo that statement usually ends with, "...so sorry if you bet on football or hockey."
 
2012-07-10 11:23:07 PM
A lot of these are grocery related. As a former Kroger "courtesy clerk" (bagging, pushing carts), let me tell you that you meet the worst humanity has to offer in supermarkets. All the asshats that complain about tipping and entitled people in the service industry should have to work at one at least once.
 
2012-07-10 11:23:19 PM
Dont get mad at me if I screw your sister. Its not my fault she is hot. Why cant the wife understand such a simple rule?
 
2012-07-10 11:23:19 PM

InfamousBLT: LineNoise: InfamousBLT: LineNoise: Grown adults should not be splitting a check in an itemized fashion. If there are 4 of you, and the total is $100, you each put in $25

Or how about, as a waiter/waitress, you ask before you start taking orders and save us the trouble.
If you don't ask, and plop down a check in front of all of us, we're going to give it back and say split it up properly. If you say you can't, then I'm going to take it up to my register, hand you my card, and tell you to only use this card to do my portion of the meal. If you say you can't then I'll buy everyone's meal and not a single one of us will ever come back, because you're all terrible terrible people.

Your waitress shouldn't have to play banker because you dine with a bunch of cheapskates.

I agree. She should pull out a number of checks corresponding to the number of people sitting at the table, write each order individually on each check, and then hand each person their receipt for the meal that they ate.

If said waitress isn't a lazy piece of shiat, that's what she'll do. If she is a lazy idiot, then she probably isn't getting tipped because you've wasted my time and/or money by not taking the 30 seconds it takes to do it properly.


Or how about you quit eating at Applebees and get some real food?
 
2012-07-10 11:23:28 PM

InfamousBLT: LineNoise: InfamousBLT: LineNoise: InfamousBLT: LineNoise: Grown adults should not be splitting a check in an itemized fashion. If there are 4 of you, and the total is $100, you each put in $25

Or how about, as a waiter/waitress, you ask before you start taking orders and save us the trouble.
If you don't ask, and plop down a check in front of all of us, we're going to give it back and say split it up properly. If you say you can't, then I'm going to take it up to my register, hand you my card, and tell you to only use this card to do my portion of the meal. If you say you can't then I'll buy everyone's meal and not a single one of us will ever come back, because you're all terrible terrible people.

Your waitress shouldn't have to play banker because you dine with a bunch of cheapskates.

I agree. She should pull out a number of checks corresponding to the number of people sitting at the table, write each order individually on each check, and then hand each person their receipt for the meal that they ate.

If said waitress isn't a lazy piece of shiat, that's what she'll do. If she is a lazy idiot, then she probably isn't getting tipped because you've wasted my time and/or money by not taking the 30 seconds it takes to do it properly.

Yes lets over complicated ordering a couple of club sandwiches so someone doesn't get charged an extra $2 for their share of the jaleapeno poppers they didn't touch.

Jesus christ, how is it so complicated to write it down on different checks? It's way more complicated for us. What if one guy only has a 20, one guy only has a couple of tens, and 2 of them don't carry cash at all? Now what? Now we have to spend a goddamn half hour trying to figure out what to do, when all you had to do was spend 30 seconds writing it down on 4 sheets of paper instead of one.

Where do you work? I want to be sure to avoid the whole goddamn chain if they employ mouthbreathers like you.


Quit being a cheapass and pay for it all. Seriously, you can't afford to take a few friends to lunch? Settle it up offsite, if you must. Better yet why don't all of you brownbag it? That way working people aren't put out by you obvious lack of tact. Your cognitive dissonance may cause you to not realize this thread is about you. ;)
 
2012-07-10 11:23:47 PM
There's an imaginary line down the middle of every walkway.

Oncoming traffic gets half. You get half. Works on roads, in the air, at sea. Has forever.

I've encountered two couples walking four abeam down a sidewalk, right into me and my boyfriend.

I pull throttle and slow finally the couple in our lanes stop and look at us funny.

And I wonder if any two neurons are connected in their brains.


(we don't get out of the way, we just make sure we're on our side, and stop.)
 
2012-07-10 11:23:50 PM

Baloo Uriza: This is usually written. And everyone who does this in the express self checkout wants to beat this guy with a sack of hammers... at least the Freddy Kroger figured out how to set a hard limit on the machine.


Not written at any of the supermarkets here. Also at least in my experience people manage to go through the self check out lanes no slower and sometimes faster than the regular lanes.
 
2012-07-10 11:24:08 PM

tinfoil-hat maggie: cowgirl toffee: If you're riding in my car, DO NOT touch the radio.

You have radio stations worth listening to, lucky : )


Nope. I just have 2 stations. It's between country music and 80's rock... and we're listening to 80's rock. :P
 
2012-07-10 11:24:25 PM
bogieworks.blogs.com
 
2012-07-10 11:25:47 PM

Dwight Schrute: Kyro: I would like to add: If the elevator is full and you're waiting for the next one, don't push the elevator button again until the full one has left, numbnuts.

I would also like to add: unless you have a physical disability, if you work below the 3rd floor, take the farking stairs when possible.


If you're a property manager, and you lock the stairwells in such a manner that it's impossible to go up, only down...you're a dick. Doubly so if you can't maintain your elevators.

/Stuck in the damn thing twice this week and it's only tuesday.
 
2012-07-10 11:26:21 PM
When in Amer'ca... speak Amer'can.
... and don't take my jerb.
 
2012-07-10 11:26:37 PM
You had enough dough to pay $800 for the airfare. Fork out another $25 to check the bag instead of being an asswipe and schlepping it on board with you. Those of us who fly regularly for our jobs detest ignorant farkwads who drag tons of shiat into the cabin.
 
2012-07-10 11:26:45 PM

netizencain: Religious people that can't carry on a conversation without mentioning the Bible or God. For fark's sake, we're discussing piracy off the coast of Africa and somehow, as usual, you bring the bible into the conversation. I get it. You have faith and believe in Jesus and God and the Bible. Great. Well, I believe in my 1990 Volvo 240 DL and how it was the best car ever made but I don't have to bring it up in every god damn conversation, do I?


Blah blah blah, Volvo = Jesus
Got it.
 
2012-07-10 11:26:58 PM

cowgirl toffee: tinfoil-hat maggie: cowgirl toffee: If you're riding in my car, DO NOT touch the radio.

You have radio stations worth listening to, lucky : )

Nope. I just have 2 stations. It's between country music and 80's rock... and we're listening to 80's rock. :P



Well, there is that older guy who keeps giving you 80's mix takes, hoping somehow that that will steal you away from me.

/What a tard.
 
2012-07-10 11:27:49 PM

What Plants Crave: 4seasons85!: ami5000: Don't talk on your phone in the bathroom unless you want me to flush the toilet 12 times on purpose. I don't even care if that's bad for the environment.

This!

I just wish people would flush.


I was going to add a list of bathroom things that annoy me and this us one of them. I would also liketo add:

- wipe your seat when you are done if there is any sprinkles or mini puddles there.

-don't let tour kid peek at me from under the stall. That is creepy.

- if you have the runs, wipe up any that hits the wall.

-poop belongs in a toilet bowl and no where else.
 
2012-07-10 11:27:57 PM

cowgirl toffee: tinfoil-hat maggie: cowgirl toffee: If you're riding in my car, DO NOT touch the radio.

You have radio stations worth listening to, lucky : )

Nope. I just have 2 stations. It's between country music and 80's rock... and we're listening to 80's rock. :P


Snerk, that's about it, but, but I brought CD's : )
 
2012-07-10 11:28:57 PM
As a server who just had to split a large check into 18 small ones because the 'ladies' decided they wanted to pay separately at the last minute (as some of them were putting on their coats), using a hand-written check system and a manual register from 1986, I say fark you InfamousBLT. Make up your mind about payment before you enter the restaurant, most servers in decent establishments aren't allowed to use multiple tickets for one table because most people aren't cheap bastards like yourself. If I told my chef I had a customer who wanted to split a bill so I could charge a member of your party $3, he'd give them a snifter of brandy and throw you out.
 
2012-07-10 11:29:09 PM
If you've taken a giant crap in a public restroom and it's so big, not all of it made it down the first round? Please do us all a favor and flush a second time.

Maybe it's an OCD thing, I don't know. I absolutely can't flush a public toilet or try to use one that already has someone else's dookie in it.

/I use PortaPotties only in the rarest and most desperate of circumstances.
 
2012-07-10 11:29:17 PM

mantabulous: A lot of these are grocery related. As a former Kroger "courtesy clerk" (bagging, pushing carts), let me tell you that you meet the worst humanity has to offer in supermarkets. All the asshats that complain about tipping and entitled people in the service industry should have to work at one at least once.


A lot of the people who work at grocery stores should calm the fark down a bit, too. Maybe it's because I've had the cops called on me several times by grocery store employees who apparently thought they were CSI agents busting an underage dude with an ID that turned out to be his and legitimate.

/fark Ralph's. And Albertsons. Not really Ralph's so much, just a little. But totally Albertsons Ralph's are only the diet coke of crappy grocery stores.
 
2012-07-10 11:29:25 PM
SLOW TRAFFIC KEEP RIGHT. That includes you Prius driving motherfarkers.

/always downshift next to a Prius
//so they can hear you hurting the environment
 
2012-07-10 11:29:47 PM
People need to realize they suck at karaoke.
 
2012-07-10 11:29:52 PM
Every table at every restaurant should be checked just before it opens to see if is wobbly. If it wobbles, it should be adjusted.

If you get on a moving walkway at the airport you should walk!! It's like running if you just briskly walk on a moving walkway. If you just stand there it's slower than walking.

When you stand in front of a urinal, you do not need to clear your throat and expel all phlegm in the loudest way possible. If you are that sick, maybe you should have stayed home.
 
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