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(Gizmodo)   Last week, scientists thought they had finally discovered the Higgs boson. But could it be its long-lost twin instead? Confused? You won't be, after this week's episode of ... CERN   (gizmodo.com) divider line 64
    More: Strange, CERN, higgs particles, Technology Review, arXiv, Compact Muon Solenoid, Bosons, LHC, Minnesota Twins  
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8994 clicks; posted to Main » on 10 Jul 2012 at 11:30 AM (2 years ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2012-07-10 11:31:47 AM  
Thanks, now I have the theme from Soap in my head.
 
2012-07-10 11:31:53 AM  
Maybe they should check if it has a goatee.
 
2012-07-10 11:32:28 AM  
So they found the wrong bosom? Well, they do come in pairs.
 
2012-07-10 11:32:53 AM  

InfrasonicTom: Maybe they should check if it has a goatee.


Garthe Boson?
 
2012-07-10 11:33:06 AM  
Were is your God particle now?
 
2012-07-10 11:33:29 AM  
does this make it the satan particle?

or maybe the loki particle for those thor about not finding the right one
 
2012-07-10 11:34:10 AM  
The dog particle?

Didn't need an accelerator for that. Just bait it with a steak particle.
 
2012-07-10 11:34:54 AM  
amultiverse.com
 
2012-07-10 11:35:14 AM  
Like quarks through a detector, so are the days of our lives.
 
2012-07-10 11:36:11 AM  
Welcome to academic science where no matter how sure you are about something and how much evidence you present somebody will always step in to cast some doubt on it. There is after all always a chance you could be wrong and the scientific process will tear things to pieces looking for even the smallest error.

And this is all accepted practice that nobody has a problem with it...

That is until you do it to a man made climate change hypothesis, then you're a heretic and must be cast out.
 
2012-07-10 11:37:57 AM  
The goddess particle CONFIRMED!
 
2012-07-10 11:41:24 AM  
Okay, who called hoax? Stand up and take a bow.
 
2012-07-10 11:42:15 AM  

InfrasonicTom: Maybe they should check if it has a goatee.


Flexo!
cache.io9.com
 
2012-07-10 11:42:50 AM  
Hahaha I bet all you people jumping on the God particle feel like real bosons now, huh?!
 
2012-07-10 11:46:33 AM  
Can we stop calling it the farking god particle already? It's the Higgs Boson. It's not that hard to pronounce.
 
2012-07-10 11:47:24 AM  
To sum up the article:

It could be these others, but the higgs is still a better fit for the data, but we don't know, so I'll make myself famous and those other guys look like idiots by writing a paper saying it might not be, but could be.
 
2012-07-10 11:47:55 AM  

InfrasonicTom: Maybe they should check if it has a goatee.


Came for this, can head back to my parallel universe.
 
2012-07-10 11:48:59 AM  

mongbiohazard: Can we stop calling it the farking god particle already? It's the Higgs Boson. It's not that hard to pronounce.


Well, since the higgs is what gives particles their drag in the higgs field, thus giving them mass-energy, maybe we should call them Fark Politics particles?
 
2012-07-10 11:49:03 AM  

RoboZombie: InfrasonicTom: Maybe they should check if it has a goatee.

Flexo!
[cache.io9.com image 640x480]


Came here for this, leaving happy.
 
2012-07-10 11:49:08 AM  

randomjsa: Welcome to academic science where no matter how sure you are about something and how much evidence you present somebody will always step in to cast some doubt on it. There is after all always a chance you could be wrong and the scientific process will tear things to pieces looking for even the smallest error.

And this is all accepted practice that nobody has a problem with it...

That is until you do it to a man made climate change hypothesis, then you're a heretic and must be cast out.


There are two active climate change threads up right now. No we realllly need a third?
 
2012-07-10 11:49:32 AM  
Also, does this make the article writers

Con, Cern trolls?
 
2012-07-10 11:49:49 AM  
In before the "May have been incorrect, therefore JEEBUS!" crowd.
 
2012-07-10 11:49:51 AM  

Kit Fister: mongbiohazard: Can we stop calling it the farking god particle already? It's the Higgs Boson. It's not that hard to pronounce.

Well, since the higgs is what gives particles their drag in the higgs field, thus giving them mass-energy, maybe we should call them Fark Politics particles?


Or, how about McParticles? ;)
 
2012-07-10 11:50:43 AM  
The found the Higg's boson's evil twin, the Higg's bison. Mu!
 
2012-07-10 11:50:58 AM  

mongbiohazard: Can we stop calling it the farking god particle already? It's the Higgs Boson. It's not that hard to pronounce.


i.qkme.me
 
2012-07-10 11:52:14 AM  
IIRC I think Higgs himself called the thing the Goddamn particle.

I think it is called job security also.

/academic scientist.
 
2012-07-10 11:55:56 AM  
encrypted-tbn2.google.com

This was the announcer on "SOAP"
 
2012-07-10 11:56:28 AM  

randomjsa: Welcome to academic science where no matter how sure you are about something and how much evidence you present somebody will always step in to cast some doubt on it. There is after all always a chance you could be wrong and the scientific process will tear things to pieces looking for even the smallest error.

And this is all accepted practice that nobody has a problem with it...

That is until you do it to a man made climate change hypothesis, then you're a heretic and must be cast out.


Glad I'm not the only one watching partisan politics ensure no good climate science ever gets done. Both sides of the argument are a bunch of assholes.
 
2012-07-10 11:58:50 AM  

DjangoStonereaver: Shazam999: So they found the wrong bosom? Well, they do come in pairs.

[desmond.imageshack.us image 640x480]

Now that's what I call 'super symmetry', baby!

/She was quite something back in the day


I was always more of a Corrine guy...

1.bp.blogspot.com
 
2012-07-10 12:02:57 PM  

DjangoStonereaver: Shazam999: So they found the wrong bosom? Well, they do come in pairs.

[desmond.imageshack.us image 640x480]

Now that's what I call 'super symmetry', baby!

/She was quite something back in the day


What episode?
 
2012-07-10 12:05:20 PM  

minnesotaboy: DjangoStonereaver: Shazam999: So they found the wrong bosom? Well, they do come in pairs.

[desmond.imageshack.us image 640x480]

Now that's what I call 'super symmetry', baby!

/She was quite something back in the day

I was always more of a Corrine guy...

[1.bp.blogspot.com image 230x226]


She was a cutie (loved the longer hair), and she's still quite the handsome
woman:

upload.wikimedia.org
 
2012-07-10 12:05:48 PM  

Kit Fister: mongbiohazard: Can we stop calling it the farking god particle already? It's the Higgs Boson. It's not that hard to pronounce.

Well, since the higgs is what gives particles their drag in the higgs field, thus giving them mass-energy, maybe we should call them Fark Politics particles?


Yes... but Higgs particles decay in several femtoseconds. Fark Politics Particles seem to lurk around for hours.
 
2012-07-10 12:07:43 PM  
FTAWe show that current LHC data already strongly disfavor both the dilatonic and non-dilatonic singlet imposters. On the other hand, a generic Higgs doublet and a triplet imposter give equally good fits to the measured event rates of the newly observed scalar resonance

Burn!
 
2012-07-10 12:14:43 PM  
Politics and chicks with a salting of physics.

Welcome to Fark!
 
2012-07-10 12:18:23 PM  
I submitted this with "Scientist rapes reporter", but yeah, this is better I guess.

Speaking of which, if anyone has that meme, I can't find it through google (guess I suck), please post it.
 
2012-07-10 12:18:45 PM  

DjangoStonereaver: Shazam999: So they found the wrong bosom? Well, they do come in pairs.

[desmond.imageshack.us image 640x480]

Now that's what I call 'super symmetry', baby!

/She was quite something back in the day


Redhead + MILF + large rack.....
What's not to like, Farkers?
 
2012-07-10 12:25:45 PM  
The Higgs Boson gives matter mass.

But I hope they haven't found the Higgs Boson's Evil Twin, the Anti-Higgs. It is responsible for Black Masses, er, I mean Dark Matter. Well, any way, it is causing the Universe to fly to pieces. It's like Newspaper Comics--pure evil!
 
2012-07-10 12:37:07 PM  

Ned Stark: The dog particle?

Didn't need an accelerator for that. Just bait it with a steak particle.




Weak, but it was also the first thing I thought of.
 
2012-07-10 12:41:56 PM  
randomjsa: That is until you do it to a man made climate change hypothesis, then you're a heretic and must be cast out.

Priapetic: Glad I'm not the only one watching partisan politics ensure no good climate science ever gets done. Both sides of the argument are a bunch of assholes.


Don't worry. No matter how idiotic your idea is, there's bound to be someone else on Fark who'll agree with you.
 
2012-07-10 12:42:46 PM  

foxyshadis: Ned Stark: The dog particle?

Didn't need an accelerator for that. Just bait it with a steak particle.



Weak, but it was also the first thing I thought of.


I guess memegenerator hates hotlinks
 
2012-07-10 12:43:46 PM  
Never mind, it just hates fark in general.

http://memegenerator.net/instance/23256723
 
2012-07-10 12:46:41 PM  

Kit Fister: To sum up the article:

It could be these others, but the higgs is still a better fit for the data, but we don't know, so I'll make myself famous and those other guys look like idiots by writing a paper saying it might not be, but could be.


I don't know that that's entirely fair. The quoted author was pretty upfront about the standard Higgs fitting the data better. The spin could be coming almost entirely from the journalist. That's certainly happened before, though your scenario is also plausible.

randomjsa: That is until you do it to a man made climate change hypothesis, then you're a heretic and must be cast out.


There's a difference between publishing in good faith an actual competing hypothesis based on actual evidence vs. simply plugging your fingers in your ears and regurgitating long-debunked denialist myths.

Idiots like you don't understand the difference, and don't understand that the former is both perfectly fair game and is open to any and everyone.

i.imgur.com
 
2012-07-10 12:52:38 PM  

minnesotaboy: DjangoStonereaver: Shazam999: So they found the wrong bosom? Well, they do come in pairs.

[desmond.imageshack.us image 640x480]

Now that's what I call 'super symmetry', baby!

/She was quite something back in the day

I was always more of a Corrine guy...

[1.bp.blogspot.com image 230x226]


Oh my, '70s brunettes... Yes please.
 
2012-07-10 12:52:47 PM  
I see...
 
2012-07-10 12:54:12 PM  
Higgs 3:16

For God so loved the world, he gave us his tiny hidden particle, so that whosoever preforms the Science, shall gain knowledge on how to create life.
 
2012-07-10 12:54:42 PM  

ciberido: Don't worry. No matter how idiotic your idea is, there's bound to be someone else on Fark who'll agree with you.


I agree with you!
 
2012-07-10 01:02:55 PM  
I was talking to my Father about this the other day, and he said. "It would much easier to find if they were looking for a big ho son."
 
2012-07-10 01:06:33 PM  

mongbiohazard: Can we stop calling it the farking god particle already? It's the Higgs Boson. It's not that hard to pronounce.


This. It's even a syllable shorter!
 
2012-07-10 01:06:40 PM  

mongbiohazard: Can we stop calling it the farking god particle already? It's the Higgs Boson. It's not that hard to pronounce.


This. A thousand times. Hell, Higgs didn't even call it "The God Particle" as someone has pointed out a thousand times. Why not just call it the Pasta Particle or the Red Particle. They're equally as accurate when referring to it.
 
2012-07-10 01:17:17 PM  

Strix occidentalis: mongbiohazard: Can we stop calling it the farking god particle already? It's the Higgs Boson. It's not that hard to pronounce.

This. It's even a syllable shorter!


No one knows who Higgs is, and no one knows what a boson is (both of these are shameful, as these people know what both a Kardashian and a "baby bump" are). People know who god is, and have some understanding of what "particles" are.

Besides which, invoking "god" in a science article is sure to drive traffic. Laziness in journalism FTW!
 
2012-07-10 01:23:45 PM  
How it might have been... Behind the scenes...

"Sir, we've DONE IT!"
"Done what?"
"FOUND THE HIGGS BOSON!"
"Shut up! I mean right now!"
"WHH??"
"IF I Take my hand away from your mouth, promise not to speak?"
"Mphh"
"Listen: this facility is the most expensive lab hardware ever built, understand? Millions and millions poured into the building of it, and more into maintaining and operating it. And paying our salaries. And you idiots go ahead and announce you found it, right off the bat, practically. We could have operated this thing for another decade, living he sweet life. But no, you idiots had to actually DO SCIENCE. Do you know what comes next after you announce you found the farking particle? You want I should call up my NASA friends to explain to you what happened after Apollo 11? The politicians are going to shut this place down and sell it for parts now! They won't understand there could be more science to be done! You guys made it seem like finding the Higgs would just unlock everything in the farking universe, now, they're gonna give us, like, six months, tops, to demonstrate anti-gravity, or we're OUT OF BUSINESS! Now, go tell those idiots to announce they were wrong."

"Too late, sir; press releases went out."

"Damn! Okay, we need to muddy the waters; teach the controversy... quick, find some bitter, mid-level guys that never got to run experiments here and have them challenge the results, we'll get a couple of years' time out of that while we ALL UPDATE OUR FARKING RESUMES, YOU SHMUCK!"
 
2012-07-10 02:15:10 PM  

Any Pie Left: How it might have been... Behind the scenes...

"Sir, we've DONE IT!"
"Done what?"
"FOUND THE HIGGS BOSON!"
"Shut up! I mean right now!"
"WHH??"
"IF I Take my hand away from your mouth, promise not to speak?"
"Mphh"
"Listen: this facility is the most expensive lab hardware ever built, understand? Millions and millions poured into the building of it, and more into maintaining and operating it. And paying our salaries. And you idiots go ahead and announce you found it, right off the bat, practically. We could have operated this thing for another decade, living he sweet life. But no, you idiots had to actually DO SCIENCE. Do you know what comes next after you announce you found the farking particle? You want I should call up my NASA friends to explain to you what happened after Apollo 11? The politicians are going to shut this place down and sell it for parts now! They won't understand there could be more science to be done! You guys made it seem like finding the Higgs would just unlock everything in the farking universe, now, they're gonna give us, like, six months, tops, to demonstrate anti-gravity, or we're OUT OF BUSINESS! Now, go tell those idiots to announce they were wrong."

"Too late, sir; press releases went out."

"Damn! Okay, we need to muddy the waters; teach the controversy... quick, find some bitter, mid-level guys that never got to run experiments here and have them challenge the results, we'll get a couple of years' time out of that while we ALL UPDATE OUR FARKING RESUMES, YOU SHMUCK!"


Pleasure to read. Cheers!
 
2012-07-10 02:48:14 PM  
Subbed with "Strange" tag because Up, Down, Top, Bottom, and Charm tags unavailable.
 
2012-07-10 02:54:14 PM  

Any Pie Left: How it might have been... Behind the scenes...

"Sir, we've DONE IT!"
"Done what?"
"FOUND THE HIGGS BOSON!"
"Shut up! I mean right now!"
"WHH??"
"IF I Take my hand away from your mouth, promise not to speak?"
"Mphh"
"Listen: this facility is the most expensive lab hardware ever built, understand? Millions and millions poured into the building of it, and more into maintaining and operating it. And paying our salaries. And you idiots go ahead and announce you found it, right off the bat, practically. We could have operated this thing for another decade, living he sweet life. But no, you idiots had to actually DO SCIENCE. Do you know what comes next after you announce you found the farking particle? You want I should call up my NASA friends to explain to you what happened after Apollo 11? The politicians are going to shut this place down and sell it for parts now! They won't understand there could be more science to be done! You guys made it seem like finding the Higgs would just unlock everything in the farking universe, now, they're gonna give us, like, six months, tops, to demonstrate anti-gravity, or we're OUT OF BUSINESS! Now, go tell those idiots to announce they were wrong."

"Too late, sir; press releases went out."

"Damn! Okay, we need to muddy the waters; teach the controversy... quick, find some bitter, mid-level guys that never got to run experiments here and have them challenge the results, we'll get a couple of years' time out of that while we ALL UPDATE OUR FARKING RESUMES, YOU SHMUCK!


"But sir, we live in a the part of the world that's actually interested in scientific discovery. It's not like this is America."

"...Oh right. Carry on."


/FTFY
 
2012-07-10 03:00:00 PM  
The what now? Doesn't subby know Tom and Katie split?
 
2012-07-10 03:19:47 PM  
Sounds like somebody has accelerator envy
 
2012-07-10 04:05:01 PM  

randomjsa: Welcome to academic science where no matter how sure you are about something and how much evidence you present somebody will always step in to cast some doubt on it. There is after all always a chance you could be wrong and the scientific process will tear things to pieces looking for even the smallest error.

And this is all accepted practice that nobody has a problem with it...

That is until you do it to a man made climate change hypothesis, then you're a heretic and must be cast out.


Are you a boson denier?
 
2012-07-10 04:19:09 PM  
It's an identical particle and goes by the same name....hm.
 
2012-07-10 07:14:34 PM  
you don't want to know what i'm willing to do for a Klondike bar.
 
2012-07-10 07:44:27 PM  
Should this new particle NOT be the Higgs but just something that looks like a Higgs boson, I propose we call it the "Mother Particle":

a) In homage to the bastardisation of the original nickname of the Higgs boson, the "Goddamn Particle" (not to be confused with the Goddamn Batman)

b) "Mother" in this case being short for "Motherfarker faked us the hell out thinking we had the Higgs boson, goddamnit so much".

:3
 
2012-07-10 08:19:30 PM  
No, we call it the Evil Spock particle.
 
2012-07-10 10:06:55 PM  
Fermilab's Tevatron actually found the thing first, but they were smart enough to keep quiet about it so as to milk the search as long as possible.

SETI? Actually succeeded back in '81. They are still working on a generation-long indoctrination effort to get us mentally prepared for the arrival in 2021.
 
2012-07-10 11:15:58 PM  
I didn't have a vision.
 
2012-07-11 12:27:40 AM  

jlm0516: RoboZombie: InfrasonicTom: Maybe they should check if it has a goatee.

Flexo!
[cache.io9.com image 640x480]

Came here for this, leaving happy.


Came here for someone coming here for this and leaving happy, leaving happy.
 
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