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(The New Yorker)   American kids are spoiled because American parents suck. Cue the Oompa Loompas   (newyorker.com) divider line 59
    More: Obvious, Americans, helicopter parents, Peruvian Amazon, carroll gardens, Institute of Archaeology, Beanie Babies, subsistence agriculture, gardeners  
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4510 clicks; posted to Geek » on 09 Jul 2012 at 2:59 PM (2 years ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2012-07-09 11:35:25 AM
Oh good, a fark parenting thread.

img.ehowcdn.com
 
2012-07-09 11:49:26 AM
Repeat. But until it gets flagged holy fark woman in the article, if your kid does something stupid that requires cleaning up a mess why aren't you making him do it himself?!
 
2012-07-09 11:53:10 AM
Who the fark is going to read all of that? Haven't all kids been called spoiled by adults since the beginning of ever?
 
2012-07-09 12:03:18 PM
Yeah, six of those spoiled-ass selfish little snowflakes just died in Afghanistan.


...A-doompadee-doo
 
2012-07-09 12:07:43 PM

Mugato: Who the fark is going to read all of that? Haven't all kids been called spoiled by adults since the beginning of ever?


And they have been right every time.

I think we're on a downward plan.
 
2012-07-09 12:10:17 PM
Kids tend to live up or down to parental expectations. This is not news.
 
2012-07-09 12:36:14 PM
2 weeks ago.. at the movie theater I witnessed this.
There's one of those in-ground water fountains.. shoots water straight into the air. Some parents had their kids running through it.. okay, whether or not you'd let your kids do that is a whole other argument.. here's the rub.
The kids (ages 5-9 my guess), wet throughout.. soaked.. jeans .. cargo shorts..sneakers..(not bathing suits) were not allowed into the movie theater because they were wet and the theater folks didn't want the kids sitting on the chairs while soaked. The parents refused to take this as an answer..they demanded their kids be allowed into the movie theater while soaking wet.

I side with the theater people.
 
2012-07-09 12:38:06 PM

Mugato: Who the fark is going to read all of that? Haven't all kids been called spoiled by adults since the beginning of ever?


You should have your mom read it to you before she tucks you in tonight.
 
2012-07-09 12:49:37 PM

brap: Mugato: Who the fark is going to read all of that? Haven't all kids been called spoiled by adults since the beginning of ever?

You should have your mom read it to you before she tucks you in tonight.


I'm not having my mom read it. I want to know whether Gryffindor wins the quidditch match more than I want to know what's in that stupid article...
 
2012-07-09 01:02:20 PM
Maybe what is right for children to learn in a pre-industrial society isn't what children in modern society need to be learning.

Do I want to raise a pussy that does whatever he's told? Or do I want to raise a kid that fights for what he wants?

Maybe if the Matsigenka's kids had a little more gumption, they wouldn't be stuck hunting for monkeys and parrots, growing yucca and bananas, and building houses that they roof with the leaves of a particular kind of palm tree, known as a kapashi.
 
2012-07-09 01:04:36 PM

ThatGuyGreg: Oh good, a fark parenting thread.

[img.ehowcdn.com image 400x267]


... but with an added patriotic twist. Let's watch happens!
 
2012-07-09 01:50:46 PM

Andromeda: Repeat. But until it gets flagged holy fark woman in the article, if your kid does something stupid that requires cleaning up a mess why aren't you making him do it himself?!


"OK, Mom. I'll do what you what you say and study for that big test. But if I fail, you have to get the teacher to change the grade."

How can this woman get it and not get it at the same time?
 
2012-07-09 01:55:20 PM
High-powered parents worry that the economic opportunities for their children are shrinking. They see a degree from a top-tier school as one of the few ways to give their kids a jump on the competition.

OK. We're good up to there.

In order to secure this advantage, they will do pretty much anything, which means not just taking care of all the cooking and cleaning but also helping their children with math homework, hiring them S.A.T. tutors, and, if necessary, suing their high school.

And there's the fail.

My parents did the first part. They made it their goal to allow me to go wherever my talent and skills would take me. But instead of doing the second part, they made sure I developed those skills and talents. They didn't try and game the system.

Leapfrogging your kids in such a way that they don't deal with failure, adversity, and challenges leaves them ill-equipped for that pricey school you spent years saving for. If that's your parenting style, save your money.
 
2012-07-09 01:57:57 PM

Diogenes: "OK, Mom. I'll do what you what you say and study for that big test. But if I fail, you have to get the teacher to change the grade"

...hold on, Mom, she's sexting me now."
 
2012-07-09 02:01:02 PM
assets.nydailynews.com

Here come the Oompa Loompas now.
 
2012-07-09 02:39:03 PM

The My Little Pony Killer: [assets.nydailynews.com image 485x323]

Here come the Oompa Loompas now.


You pick the one picture that makes them look normally colored?!?
 
2012-07-09 02:44:42 PM

The Stealth Hippopotamus: The My Little Pony Killer: [assets.nydailynews.com image 485x323]

Here come the Oompa Loompas now.

You pick the one picture that makes them look normally colored?!?


That's racist?

;-)
 
2012-07-09 03:04:29 PM
One six year old who did random chores without complaining means that every child in western civilization is spoiled rotten.
 
2012-07-09 03:09:25 PM
i.imgur.com

They forgot to include a picture of the author, who also goes by: "Amelia Bedford Furthington Chesterhill."

/no one at the new yorker has an anus
 
2012-07-09 03:12:07 PM
cdn.uproxx.com

Don't wanna learn to use the potty? I'll play you for it, punk. Don't think I won't whip a baby's ass at some Soul Calibur.
 
2012-07-09 03:21:28 PM
It is darn hard to raise a kid not spoiled. I need to work on curbing my kids expectations for what the are entitled in life but I do pride myself on teaching them logic and having a good vocabulary. My 4 year old uses language (properly) that completely confuses his 8-9 year old cousins.
 
2012-07-09 03:51:45 PM
Too many cougar moms, not enough tiger moms, amirite?
 
2012-07-09 03:53:44 PM
More or less.

Everyone wants to yell at the precious snowflakes. Not enough people yell at the parents, or at least, not for the right reasons.

I see a lot of whining about helicopter parents. You want parents that involved. You just want them involved in a better way.
 
2012-07-09 03:57:05 PM
Not that I want to dispute there are questionable, if not downright awful, parents out there but isn't it possible that the environments of children in the US and in the jungle primeval are so different as to result in children with different attitudes and behavior regardless of parenting techniques?

Pretty sure I could not count on my 4 year old to sweep my hut and catch my shellfish. But he listens when I tell him to take a bath, clean his room, or tie his shoes. Don't think that necessarily means we should seek to emulate the parenting techniques of people who's kids have to work to survive.
 
2012-07-09 04:04:22 PM

imontheinternet: [cdn.uproxx.com image 300x299]

Don't wanna learn to use the potty? I'll play you for it, punk. Don't think I won't whip a baby's ass at some Soul Calibur.


I would whip ALL THE ASS at Soul Calibur.
 
2012-07-09 04:08:54 PM

js34603: Not that I want to dispute there are questionable, if not downright awful, parents out there but isn't it possible that the environments of children in the US and in the jungle primeval are so different as to result in children with different attitudes and behavior regardless of parenting techniques?

Pretty sure I could not count on my 4 year old to sweep my hut and catch my shellfish. But he listens when I tell him to take a bath, clean his room, or tie his shoes. Don't think that necessarily means we should seek to emulate the parenting techniques of people who's kids have to work to survive.


And because my nephew doesn't listen, has strong objections to doing almost anything, is disruptive and acts out in class, we had to cull the little guy.

I mean, it could be because he's 3, but that sounds like appeasement liberal talk. Just set him out on the ice floe early.

// also, the new brother didn't help things
 
2012-07-09 04:09:45 PM

Mugato: Who the fark is going to read all of that? Haven't all kids been called spoiled by adults since the beginning of ever?


Yes.
 
2012-07-09 04:16:20 PM
I think, ultimately, it doesn't matter too much how spoiled a kid is. They all get smacked down by reality sooner or later.
 
2012-07-09 04:29:46 PM

XMark: I think, ultimately, it doesn't matter too much how spoiled a kid is. They all get smacked down by reality sooner or later.


That's mostly true. Spoiling a kid ultimately does them a disservice; at some point Daddy and Mommy can't help any more. There are some exceptions but none of us have that kind of money.
 
2012-07-09 04:30:14 PM
Generalizations are fun. As someone who grew up in the early 90s I regularly heard "why are all these kids so lazy?" Turns out we're doing alright for ourselves and would be doing even better if all you boomers would die/retire.

/I'm young but I still got a lawn, and old people better stay off it
 
2012-07-09 04:31:46 PM
Article appears to be a repeat (or a very close rehash).

But yeah, when you place responsibilities upon your child and ensure that they stay with them, they tend to mature faster. Learning through trial and error helps ensure that the lesson sticks. When you treat your children like perpetual toddlers and insulate them from life lessons, they will be unprepared for an adult world where such conditions do not exist.
 
2012-07-09 04:32:50 PM

Krieghund:

Do I want to raise a pussy that does whatever he's told? Or do I want to raise a kid that fights for what he wants?


It is a father's lament. I raised my kids to think independently, and now they do.
 
2012-07-09 04:38:10 PM

Mugato: Haven't all kids been called spoiled by adults since the beginning of ever?


Before our modern age, I don't think children ever had a chance to become spoiled. They were expected to help with the chores or the labor as soon as they were physically able to do so. If you weren't rich enough to own slaves, you just bred your own.
 
2012-07-09 04:46:44 PM
The My Little Pony Killer:
assets.nydailynews.com

Here come the Oompa Loompas now.


i182.photobucket.com
 
2012-07-09 05:34:02 PM
And fat parents have fat kids too.
 
2012-07-09 05:38:42 PM
They are spoiled because we aren't allowed to beat them anymore for being little shiats
 
2012-07-09 05:44:05 PM

MindChild: They are spoiled because we aren't allowed to beat them anymore for being little shiats


THIS
 
2012-07-09 05:47:30 PM

Krieghund: Maybe what is right for children to learn in a pre-industrial society isn't what children in modern society need to be learning.

Do I want to raise a pussy that does whatever he's told? Or do I want to raise a kid that fights for what he wants?

Maybe if the Matsigenka's kids had a little more gumption, they wouldn't be stuck hunting for monkeys and parrots, growing yucca and bananas, and building houses that they roof with the leaves of a particular kind of palm tree, known as a kapashi.


I hear ya, but the introduction of preindustrial tasks teaches more than you probably know.

My daughter milked two goats then fed and watered 15 animals at 9:00 this morning. She's 5. She's also an avid reader and has mastered simple mathematics.

What did your child do today?

/she likes achievement
//simple tasks allow for more achievement
///she hates video games
 
2012-07-09 05:56:03 PM

Fatbeard: MindChild: They are spoiled because we aren't allowed to beat them anymore for being little shiats

THIS


You only have to beat them because you never taught them not to be little shiats.

If you're beating your child, you already failed.
 
2012-07-09 06:11:04 PM
I just kept picturing Bill Murray in Rushmore.
 
2012-07-09 06:15:19 PM
Somewhat related, this a short lecture by noted lecturer and writer Alexander Mccall Smith Link to lecture

His point is that we've lost the basics of what makes a society worth living in. We've lost the ability to be polite. To keep something back and not just say whatever rushes into our heads. And as a consequence how society is coming apart. It's an interesting lecture worth the watch.
 
2012-07-09 06:36:27 PM

indarwinsshadow: Somewhat related, this a short lecture by noted lecturer and writer Alexander Mccall Smith Link to lecture

His point is that we've lost the basics of what makes a society worth living in. We've lost the ability to be polite. To keep something back and not just say whatever rushes into our heads. And as a consequence how society is coming apart. It's an interesting lecture worth the watch.


Yeah, well, fark you too, buddy

(I kid!)
 
2012-07-09 06:51:51 PM

Diogenes: The Stealth Hippopotamus: The My Little Pony Killer: [assets.nydailynews.com image 485x323]

Here come the Oompa Loompas now.

You pick the one picture that makes them look normally colored?!?

That's racist?

;-)


Trick question; there are NO pictures that make them look normal.
 
2012-07-09 06:52:18 PM

rohar:

I hear ya, but the introduction of preindustrial tasks teaches more than you probably know.

My daughter milked two goats then fed and watered 15 animals at 9:00 this morning. She's 5. She's also an avid reader and has mastered simple mathematics.

What did your child do today?

/she likes achievement
//simple tasks allow for more achievement
///she hates video games


My kid had 3 hours of school, followed by 3 hours of tutoring.
He's 3.

Now he's chilling in front of the TV. And that's where he picks up the stuff that impresses adults, like being able to name the species of dinosaurs.
(Ok, so he's around easily impressed adults.)

I don't really get your point though. Did milking the goats help your daughter learn simple mathematics?

I do certainly think kids should have to do chores. But it's also a good thing that they try to push limits.
 
2012-07-09 07:15:39 PM

Krieghund: rohar:

I hear ya, but the introduction of preindustrial tasks teaches more than you probably know.

My daughter milked two goats then fed and watered 15 animals at 9:00 this morning. She's 5. She's also an avid reader and has mastered simple mathematics.

What did your child do today?

/she likes achievement
//simple tasks allow for more achievement
///she hates video games

My kid had 3 hours of school, followed by 3 hours of tutoring.
He's 3.

Now he's chilling in front of the TV. And that's where he picks up the stuff that impresses adults, like being able to name the species of dinosaurs.
(Ok, so he's around easily impressed adults.)

I don't really get your point though. Did milking the goats help your daughter learn simple mathematics?

I do certainly think kids should have to do chores. But it's also a good thing that they try to push limits.


Working with animals teaches temperament and responsibility. It's hell to learn if you're constantly throwing a tantrum and challenging authority. "shiat's just gotta get done" is a lesson we quit teaching out kids in this country. From all indicators, we're suffering for that.

And if you think knowing species of dinosaurs is impressive for a small child, you don't know many small children. They're fascinated with dinosaurs. Once they can read, there's little you can do to stop that.
 
2012-07-09 07:29:09 PM

Andromeda: Repeat. But until it gets flagged holy fark woman in the article, if your kid does something stupid that requires cleaning up a mess why aren't you making him do it himself?!


No shiat, you would be amazed how fast the "I wouldn't do that shiat if I was you" voice develops when a kid has to clean up after their screw up.
 
2012-07-09 07:51:20 PM

Krieghund: Do I want to raise a pussy that does whatever he's told? Or do I want to raise a kid that fights for what he wants?


Careful. You could end up with a kid that fights for his right to be a pussy.

Historically, at least some fathers have had trouble with that...
 
2012-07-09 07:54:43 PM

indarwinsshadow: Somewhat related, this a short lecture by noted lecturer and writer Alexander Mccall Smith Link to lecture

His point is that we've lost the basics of what makes a society worth living in. We've lost the ability to be polite. To keep something back and not just say whatever rushes into our heads. And as a consequence how society is coming apart. It's an interesting lecture worth the watch.


Hm. The lecture fails on several faces. First, the premise that our society is failing or coming apart is not borne out by the facts. Violent crime is way down by all counts over the last four decades. Second, "politeness" (at least in public in the real world, if not the Internet), is actually enforced with sociological mores in the form of political correctness. The whole lecture was based on anecdotes from a single series of events (the London riots).

In modern society, underprivileged youth have always engaged in criminal behavior, but the problems associated with youth gangs are decreasing as opportunity and education is extended to the lower classes. Are things perfect? No. But they are absolutely improving.

If we must explain riots (which have existed throughout modern times), a more accurate viewpoint is that rage and negativity are actually suppressed (especially in a heavily monitored society such as the UK), resulting in more explosive expressions of those tendencies. They are largely initiated by a disenfranchised population facing a real or perceived injustice (in the case of the Tottenham and London riots it was the Mark Duggan shooting), and carried to their finality by youth who just join in it because it looks like an opportunity to engage in fun criminal behavior with little chance of consequences.

I hate that riot discussions always seem to degenerate to "what's wrong with the rioters?" instead of the more productive question "how are we disenfranchising the underclass that starts the riot?"

For example, that method was used after the Detroit riots of 1967 to deflect attention from the racist policies and police abuse that caused them as well as the 1992 LA riots - just to name two.
 
2012-07-09 08:19:36 PM
The rod was spared and the children were spoiled.

Who could ever have foreseen such a development?
 
2012-07-09 09:09:20 PM

rohar: Fatbeard: MindChild: They are spoiled because we aren't allowed to beat them anymore for being little shiats

THIS

You only have to beat them because you never taught them not to be little shiats.

If you're beating your child, you already failed.


Said by someone without children. You have two avenues with young kids. Positive reinforcement or negative. The first leads to this article, the latter what I lament we have lost. Giving a child a cookie for putting their dishes in the sink is multitudes less successful that taking a belt to their ass for having to be told to do so.
 
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