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(Minneapolis Star Tribune)   Snowflake dining 101   (startribune.com) divider line 248
    More: Stupid, snowflakes  
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20387 clicks; posted to Main » on 08 Jul 2012 at 3:36 PM (2 years ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2012-07-08 08:28:46 PM
sorry guys... gluten "allergies" are made up.

Get over it you pussies
 
2012-07-08 08:32:21 PM

OtherLittleGuy: Toshiro Mifune's Letter Opener: Subby, you will receive many responses calling you a dick.

This is one of them.

Concurs:

[images3.wikia.nocookie.net image 612x561]


That dude has a serious case of cauliflower ears.
 
2012-07-08 08:36:27 PM
I'd never heard of gluten until like a couple years ago. Now all of a sudden I can't swing a whatever-the-fark-it-is-that-has-gluten-in-it-that-is-maybe-rope-shape d-or-has-a-tail without hitting someone claiming to be allergic to it.
 
2012-07-08 08:44:01 PM
Jeez you people are nasty and I say that as someone who's been on Fark for years.

The kid is in high school, will be on his own in college next year and his parents are helping him make sure his dietary needs will be met, helping him figure out where he can eat. That's not helicopter parenting, it's just parenting. I bet your parents helped you transition to college and taught you things you would need to know.

There is a learning process to dealing with celiac disease, since gluten hides in unexpected places. My niece, a junior in college, was recently diagnosed with celiac disease. And crazy as it might sound, she has to learn what she can and can't eat. She met with a nutritionist a couple of times. She got some cookbooks with gluten free recipes and she's figuring out how to deal. And yes, her parents help her. Not because they're helicopter parents (quite the opposite) but because they're her parents and that's what they do, help their children as necessary.

Yes, there are a lot of people who have randomly decided not to eat gluten for dubious reasons, but celiac disease is still real and gluten is still a big problem for people who have it. It's not one or the other, both exist simultaneously.

Being a jerk about allergies and medical conditions doesn't make you hip or cool, it just makes you a jerk.
 
2012-07-08 08:49:57 PM

Sid_6.7: F*ck you, subby. Some people cannot consume gluten without terrifying health problems resulting.

It's not an issue of them being "precious little snowflakes", it's an issue of them lacking the ability to safely consume an extremely common food protein.


Too busy face-f**king your mother - after that I'm taking some scissors and cutting your umbilical cord.
 
2012-07-08 08:54:35 PM

sorebones: I'd never heard of gluten until like a couple years ago. Now all of a sudden I can't swing a whatever-the-fark-it-is-that-has-gluten-in-it-that-is-maybe-rope-shape d-or-has-a-tail without hitting someone claiming to be allergic to it.


Nobody ever heard of germs until the late 1800s, and now people won't even eat food off of the ground anymore without being paranoid about how many "germs" are on the food.
 
2012-07-08 08:57:50 PM

beantowndog: Charge double and mark everything gluten free, problem solved.


kid has celiac disease....dude
 
2012-07-08 09:01:58 PM
Lol. I only had to look at the photo to know that subby wasn't exaggerating.
 
2012-07-08 09:06:07 PM

The All-Powerful Atheismo: What snowflake dining may look like:

[cache.gawker.com image 640x213]


This comment deserves more attention because it made me laugh.
 
2012-07-08 09:25:38 PM

Capt. Sparkles: I met a girl while going to OSU who had this illness. She was a transfer student from a college in Texas. Halfway through the semester her school inexplicably changed the menu in the cafeteria and completely did away with ALL of the gluten-free food. Since she was almost 100% reliant on the school's cafeteria for her food, she had to transfer out and OSU was the only school she could find that would accept her that late into the quarter. She wanted to just drop her classes and wait until the new school year to start, but would have lost all of her financial aid. The whole situation was pretty ridiculous.


What were they serving that everything had gluten in it?
 
2012-07-08 09:33:44 PM

Midnight Rambler: [stmedia.startribune.com image 630x420]
Max Timmons' parents share a laugh with their son, unaware that it was Max, and not Mittens, who accidentally broke one of the eight Franklin Mint plates proudly displayed on the wall. Max's awkward attempt at replacing the plate with Mitten's red water dish was successful.


that was beautiful.

/wipes away tear of joy
 
2012-07-08 09:53:27 PM

puffy999: Incidentally... if gluten puts you in the hospital, please don't breed.

I'm not saying harm yourself, I'm saying don't pass on your horrible condition to future generations.


It's not passed on that way, jackass. But you can go right ahead and take your own advice. The world certainly doesn't need any more of you.
 
2012-07-08 09:57:55 PM

Atypical Person Reading Fark: AssAsInAssassin: Bathia_Mapes: \though I tend to think the peanut one has more to do with lack of built-up immunity than anything else

An allergy is the opposite of that. It's an overly aggressive immune system that goes full-on Hulk at the slightest provocation.

And yet, one major treatment for allergy is allergy shots, which slowly build up a person's immunity by introducing them to tiny amounts of the allergen. My daughter was so allergic to cats that the first time she was in a house with one, her throat swelled up and her face swelled up and the panicked mother was freaking out on the phone, while I freaked out driving over there with benadryl and on the trip to the hospital. We had no belief in allergy shots, but we knew people who said they worked. At any rate, she was 3 when she encountered cats, and kept having allergic reactions to even minor contact with cat dander (on other kids' clothes, etc.) So we started shots when she was about six. She stopped them when she was about 12, and by then - no allergy to cats.

One way of translating this is that some people need minor exposure to allergens as they grow up, rather than living in a bubble. I have friends whose kids are indoors in HEPA-filtered spaces 90% of their lives. They tend to have allergies when they go outdoors.

I'll shut up after I say that yeah, most people with "gluten intolerance" are quasi-anorexics or former anorexics or outright anorexics who have long, long lists of foods they cannot eat. So they sit there with their green bean and no soy sauce. That amino acid soy stuff substitute - you go get it for them, because they say they want "Chinese food" but they won't use it once you get it (it has calories from protein).


This does not refute my thesis. Thank you for agreeing with me.
 
2012-07-08 10:11:45 PM

Gyrfalcon: doubled99: It's already been proven several times in studies that nearly 70% of people who believe they have food allergies in fact do not.

Of course none of them believe it. It's all real to them.
As is any neurosis when indulged enough.

A lot of people think they have "allergies" when what they have is "intolerance." Some of us just use the term "allergy" because it's easier than explaining something like this:

I'm "allergic" to alcohol. Now, I don't have a real alcohol allergy. What I do have is some kind of intolerance that makes me unable to eat anything with alcohol in it. I get sick if I even use a cough drop with alcohol in it, or mouthwash with an alcohol base. Even food with alcohol in the sauce or whatever causes this reaction. When I sip wine, all I can taste is raw alcohol, as if it was made with rubbing alcohol. Now, I could explain that everytime someone asks me why I don't drink, but it's quicker and easier to say "I'm allergic to alcohol," and usually they'll go away.

Granted, people like me are in a small minority, but there's no good word to explain whatever it is I've got.


Very well put. That's a crappy intolerance to have though...
 
2012-07-08 10:34:35 PM

jaytkay: gokc69: The new wave of Celiac and gluten intolerance is largely tied to agricultural genetics. The grain that we farm now has been genetically modified to the point where some people's bodies don't recognize it as a food protein, and turn on the defenses as if it was an intruder.

[citation badly needed]


http://towncenterwellness.com/blog-posts/genetic-modification-of-whea t -responsible-for-increase-in-gluten-sensitivity/

Here ya go.
 
2012-07-08 10:47:48 PM

pacified: sorry guys... gluten "allergies" are made up.

Get over it you pussies


Well that sounds like a thoughtful, educated opinion. I'll mention that to my Celiac 15 yr-old daughter next time she's doubled up in pain from cross-contaminated food. The little faker.

CSB:

Me to my friend: "At least I won't have to worry about her starting to drink beer in high school".
My friend: "Yeah, she'll have to go straight to vodka",
 
2012-07-08 10:50:14 PM
just out of curiosity, how did this "gluten allergy" not get utterly smacked down by darwin after 10,000 years of eating basically nothing but bread and beer?
 
2012-07-08 10:55:42 PM
DarkJohnson: Wonder if the cat is Gluten free?

Of course cats are gluten free. Otherwise, he wouldn't be so hell bent on asian food.
 
2012-07-08 11:07:30 PM

meat0918: Some people cannot consume gluten without terrifying health problems resulting.


If "might get diarrhea" is now a terrifying health problem then Taco Bell is a gawd danged pandemic.
 
2012-07-08 11:09:52 PM

SpaceBison: Capt. Sparkles: I met a girl while going to OSU who had this illness. She was a transfer student from a college in Texas. Halfway through the semester her school inexplicably changed the menu in the cafeteria and completely did away with ALL of the gluten-free food. Since she was almost 100% reliant on the school's cafeteria for her food, she had to transfer out and OSU was the only school she could find that would accept her that late into the quarter. She wanted to just drop her classes and wait until the new school year to start, but would have lost all of her financial aid. The whole situation was pretty ridiculous.

What were they serving that everything had gluten in it?


I honestly couldn't tell you. She just said that there was pretty much nothing left that she could eat there.
 
2012-07-08 11:27:17 PM

Arthen: meat0918: Some people cannot consume gluten without terrifying health problems resulting.

If "might get diarrhea" is now a terrifying health problem then Taco Bell is a gawd danged pandemic.


How 'bout doubling over with massive stomach cramps, gas that would knock over walls, cold sweat, and inability to sleep through the night? That's pretty damned terrifying.
 
2012-07-08 11:45:56 PM
F*ck you, subby. Some people cannot consume gluten without terrifying health problems resulting.

It's not an issue of them being "precious little snowflakes", it's an issue of them lacking the ability to safely consume an extremely common food protein.



I came here hoping someone had said this already. I'm not one of those people, but I'm leaving satisfied that not everyone in the world is an insensitive, unthinking moron like the subby just proved to be.

/Still no hope for the human race, but
//f*ck you subby
 
2012-07-08 11:59:42 PM

neilbradley: Arthen: meat0918: Some people cannot consume gluten without terrifying health problems resulting.

If "might get diarrhea" is now a terrifying health problem then Taco Bell is a gawd danged pandemic.

How 'bout doubling over with massive stomach cramps, gas that would knock over walls, cold sweat, and inability to sleep through the night? That's pretty damned terrifying.


Sounds like Taco Bell alright.
 
2012-07-09 12:14:49 AM
How long until hospitals start wrapping children in bubble wrap before they leave the hospital. We try to prevent every little sniffle, every little scratch. Kids don't play outside anymore without being wrapped head to toe in something to keep them from being hurt. Kids eat processed foods about 99% of the time, and what little raw food they eat is either genetically engineered or is picked before it is ripe, nuked to look ripe, bottled water and on and on.
It's not any surprise that we have so many people allergic to nuts, wheat, and on and on.

As someone who suffered from allergic rhinitis in my youth (60's), and didn't get "cured" until I was in my 40's, allergic anaphylaxis is nothing to sneeze at (no pun intended). Over a 4 year course of allergy shots, I can be around cats, mold, flowers, trees and my evil arch enemy, rag weed without sneezing, or ending up in the emergency room (happened twice in 30 years).
If more people who are "allergic" would seek out a qualified allergist, perhaps we wouldn't have so many people "allergic" to everyday things.
***Helpful tip***
Some people can be "cured" of "hay fever" by eating a teaspoon of raw (LOCAL to your area) honey. It works similar to allergy shots. You ingest
a small amount of honey, which is pollinated from the things that make you sneeze, and build up immunity to what makes you sneeze. Takes time, but if you suffer from mild to moderate allergies, it might be cheaper than shots.
 
2012-07-09 12:15:47 AM
Gluten intolerance really no different than people who can't digest lactose..Some people can eat a little
and be ok, some people can't look at it without cramping up and doubling over in pain..
 
2012-07-09 12:58:41 AM

jtown: Gyrfalcon: This kid better start learning that, because not everyone is going to provide him gluten-free food all his life, unless he never leaves his nest.

All of the product labels in stores and gluten-free menus in restaurants kinda contradict your claim. The first world is becoming an easy place to be special.

In the first 35 years of my life, I met exactly one person with Celiac Disease. In the last 5 years, I've met half a dozen people who claim to be gluten intolerant. But I've never heard a single one of those people say Celiac Disease and I've seen several of them eat plenty of gluten. FWIW, my vegetarian friends often eat meat when it's just two of us having lunch or dinner. In a group: "I haven't eaten meat in 5 years." "I haven't eaten meat in 11 years." Just me and 1 friend: "This place has the best steak sandwich!" (Which they then order and consume with great relish.)


Who puts relish on a steak sandwich? Even if it is great relish...still, ew.
 
2012-07-09 01:18:28 AM

DaCaptain19: Sid_6.7: F*ck you, subby. Some people cannot consume gluten without terrifying health problems resulting.

It's not an issue of them being "precious little snowflakes", it's an issue of them lacking the ability to safely consume an extremely common food protein.

Too busy face-f**king your mother - after that I'm taking some scissors and cutting your umbilical cord.


Jesus. I don't know why I laughed so hard at that.
 
2012-07-09 01:20:36 AM
Also, I do have a lactose intolerance. It isn't terrible. Do you know what I ask others to do to accommodate me? fark nothing. I take it like a man. fark you body, I'll drink all the god damn milk I want and let the toilet deal with the results later.
 
2012-07-09 01:50:33 AM

ThatDarkFellow: Maybe some people should just take a step back, breathe in and realize that nature just didn't intend for them to survive that long


You're right. I'm going to stop taking that daily pill that keeps my heart from going haywire.

How do you (and the rest of you morons) feel about nature's violent psychopaths? If you get killed by one, is that OK? It's nature, after all.
 
2012-07-09 02:29:33 AM
i441.photobucket.com
 
2012-07-09 02:48:00 AM

Sid_6.7: F*ck you, subby. Some people cannot consume gluten without terrifying health problems resulting.

It's not an issue of them being "precious little snowflakes", it's an issue of them lacking the ability to safely consume an extremely common food protein.


www.crystalinks.com
 
2012-07-09 02:55:03 AM

MadAzza: ThatDarkFellow: Maybe some people should just take a step back, breathe in and realize that nature just didn't intend for them to survive that long

You're right. I'm going to stop taking that daily pill that keeps my heart from going haywire.

How do you (and the rest of you morons) feel about nature's violent psychopaths? If you get killed by one, is that OK? It's nature, after all.


I'm not really sure what point you were trying to make. I'm sure you thought it sounded fine, but I don't think you got everything in there.
 
2012-07-09 03:10:26 AM
One of my aunts developed Celiac in her 80's. She made the best tamales, albondigas, and just about anything else, and now she pretty much just watches from across the room. She has to be EXTREMELY careful in eating, the slightest contamination and she's in the hospital, it hits her within a couple bites. She's now stick thin because she can't eat anything. It's sad, and it's real. On the other hand, there's a mother and daughter who come into my store who are more or less vegetarian because "my daughter is allergic to gluten". They eat sweets up the yin-yang and biatch about how hard it is to lose weight, all the while making snarky comments about how they'll live so much longer than meat eaters. I've had 3 employees and my old boss tell me that the mom is hot for me, but ugly on the inside is a turnoff. To quote Ron White, "You can't fix stupid."
 
2012-07-09 09:31:38 AM
If you are one of the tiny minority of humans who have this "disease", then you know it's true, and don't need to stress what other people think.

Easy to spot the rest of the snowflakes here. They're the ones who get so defensive and angry.
 
2012-07-09 09:35:23 AM

GT_bike: [i441.photobucket.com image 448x450]


I couldn't believe that actually exists. Then I Googled it. Now I know it exists, but I still can't believe it.
 
2012-07-09 10:10:18 AM

davidphogan: FishyFred: Sid_6.7: F*ck you, subby. Some people cannot consume gluten without terrifying health problems resulting.

It's not an issue of them being "precious little snowflakes", it's an issue of them lacking the ability to safely consume an extremely common food protein.

I did enjoy the family's casual insult of the salad bar.

You don't make friends with salad.


You do if you toss salad

/said
//oh, subby, you are a dick.
 
2012-07-09 10:27:07 AM

xanadian: Isn't it strange how much more common things like Celiac are these days? Never heard of gluten intolerance when I was a kid--either diagnosed or "hell, why do I crap hot-and-sour soup when I eat bread?"


Yeah, and I never heard much about cancer in the 1800's, guess it must be a new disease that just didn't exist before. Same with heart disease.

Or you might just be an idiot.
 
2012-07-09 10:29:24 AM

FriarReb98: Bathia_Mapes: I wish someone could explain why I suddenly developed allergies to both peanuts and shellfish when I was around 16-years old. Ate both with no problems before then, and BAM, got two new allergies within months of each other.

I grew up in the 50s & 60s and was constantly playing outside, getting dirty, etc., just as any average child of the time did.

Like I said, it's something in the processing. Some random preservative derivative that just out and out farks with one's enzymatic chemistry. Don't get me wrong, I feel bad for people that have it, but it's just...farking bizarre is what it is.


I think it is actually caused by the change in our atmosphere. Greater oenetration of UV radiation has caused our metabolism to break down proteins differently.

/making crap up to sound smart is fun.
 
2012-07-09 11:57:53 AM
Why didn't they put Uncle Stuart in the picture?

blog.communispace.com
 
2012-07-09 12:57:06 PM

Voiceofreason01: beantowndog: Charge double and mark everything gluten free, problem solved.

kid has celiac disease....dude


triple?
 
2012-07-09 01:03:21 PM

Madbassist1: Sid_6.7: F*ck you, subby. Some people cannot consume gluten without terrifying health problems resulting.

It's not an issue of them being "precious little snowflakes", it's an issue of them lacking the ability to safely consume an extremely common food protein. That has only begun to show itself in the last decade

ftfa


1) increased use of wheat gluten in processed foods over the past 20 years
2) increased consumption of processed foods
3) increased processing of foods even when there's no farking reason to process those foods
4) before increased awareness, kids would die by age 5
 
2012-07-09 04:54:28 PM

doubled99: If you are one of the tiny minority of humans who have this "disease", then you know it's true, and don't need to stress what other people think.

Easy to spot the rest of the snowflakes here. They're the ones who get so defensive and angry.


Bullshiat ... it is very annoying watching people belittle a condition which is extraordinarily painful and forces you to cut out some of the best foods in life.

Subby and all the haters, including you, are dicks.
 
2012-07-09 04:58:09 PM

Farking Canuck: doubled99: If you are one of the tiny minority of humans who have this "disease", then you know it's true, and don't need to stress what other people think.

Easy to spot the rest of the snowflakes here. They're the ones who get so defensive and angry.

Bullshiat ... it is very annoying watching people belittle a condition which is extraordinarily painful and forces you to cut out some of the best foods in life.

Subby and all the haters, including you, are dicks.


Yeah, but we can eat awesome food... so we'll be alright
 
2012-07-09 06:44:50 PM

MadAzza: ThatDarkFellow: Maybe some people should just take a step back, breathe in and realize that nature just didn't intend for them to survive that long

You're right. I'm going to stop taking that daily pill that keeps my heart from going haywire.

How do you (and the rest of you morons) feel about nature's violent psychopaths? If you get killed by one, is that OK? It's nature, after all.


Do you find your daily pills growing on a bush somewhere? In nature, you would be dead by now. And yes, psychopaths are natural but so is killing them once they are discovered.

Nature red in tooth and claw.
 
2012-07-09 06:55:32 PM

Psycoholic_Slag: MadAzza: ThatDarkFellow: Maybe some people should just take a step back, breathe in and realize that nature just didn't intend for them to survive that long

You're right. I'm going to stop taking that daily pill that keeps my heart from going haywire.

How do you (and the rest of you morons) feel about nature's violent psychopaths? If you get killed by one, is that OK? It's nature, after all.

Do you find your daily pills growing on a bush somewhere? In nature, you would be dead by now. And yes, psychopaths are natural but so is killing them once they are discovered.

Nature red in tooth and claw.


So, I assume you do not eat any farm raised food, or use any products that were not scavenged from nature? Do you even understand how stupid this line of thought is? I know, I know, some people need so hard to feel superior about something, they fall back on the 'even though I am an idiot, I don't have food allergies, therefore I am genetically superior'. You do realize that everyone else is laughing at you?
 
2012-07-09 07:57:19 PM

p51d007: ***Helpful tip***
Some people can be "cured" of "hay fever" by eating a teaspoon of raw (LOCAL to your area) honey. It works similar to allergy shots. You ingest
a small amount of honey, which is pollinated from the things that make you sneeze, and build up immunity to what makes you sneeze. Takes time, but if you suffer from mild to moderate allergies, it might be cheaper than shots.



Yeah, well, it didn't work for my neighbor.
He didn't eat his honey.
Which is why she's so pissy.
 
2012-07-09 09:29:20 PM

MycroftHolmes: Psycoholic_Slag: MadAzza: ThatDarkFellow: Maybe some people should just take a step back, breathe in and realize that nature just didn't intend for them to survive that long

You're right. I'm going to stop taking that daily pill that keeps my heart from going haywire.

How do you (and the rest of you morons) feel about nature's violent psychopaths? If you get killed by one, is that OK? It's nature, after all.

Do you find your daily pills growing on a bush somewhere? In nature, you would be dead by now. And yes, psychopaths are natural but so is killing them once they are discovered.

Nature red in tooth and claw.

So, I assume you do not eat any farm raised food, or use any products that were not scavenged from nature? Do you even understand how stupid this line of thought is? I know, I know, some people need so hard to feel superior about something, they fall back on the 'even though I am an idiot, I don't have food allergies, therefore I am genetically superior'. You do realize that everyone else is laughing at you?


First, lighten up.
Second,the point is some people are kept alive by modern technology. Not a bad thing. I'll take advantage of anything like that I need to to survive. There are certain genetic traits that should not be passed along and for millions of years nature took care of that usually soon after birth. You don't have to like it but you can't deny it.
 
2012-07-10 08:28:33 AM

The My Little Pony Killer: Madbassist1: Sid_6.7: F*ck you, subby. Some people cannot consume gluten without terrifying health problems resulting.

It's not an issue of them being "precious little snowflakes", it's an issue of them lacking the ability to safely consume an extremely common food protein. That has only begun to show itself in the last decade

ftfa

I know, isn't it weird how advances in medicine and science work?

/you're an idiot


Smarter and better paid than you, bub.
 
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