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(BusinessWeek)   DynoMegaCorp Foodstuffs Inc. to open several Olive Garden-Red Lobster combo restaurants so hoverounders and other assorted hayseeds can have a one-stop outlet for creamed salt and boiled fat while waiting for their diabetic foot to fall off   (businessweek.com) divider line 229
    More: Sick, Red Lobster, Flagler County, casual dining, Sanford C. Bernstein, Yum!, Olive Garden, Brands Inc., Tuscany  
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6697 clicks; posted to Main » on 06 Jul 2012 at 9:19 PM (2 years ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2012-07-06 10:18:46 PM

SwiftFox: Don't know about Red Lobster, never went in one, but your house *is* at least as good a place, in a lower price range than OG. You can make anything they sell about as quickly. And replace their breadsticks by painting Krazy Bread from Little Caesar's with some olive oil.


Agreed. I cooked in a restaurant for a while, I usually only go out for dinner at places that can cook circles around me. Just went to The Dandelion, a new Stephen Star place in Philly, worth every penny and pretty affordable to boot. It was cool because they did tons of stuff I know how to make but it was just done 10x better than I have ever had, let alone made myself.

/sniff sniff, I miss Little Caesar's
//they have disappeared from my area
 
2012-07-06 10:20:31 PM

Frantic Freddie: ///told the wife the next time they come over I'm makin' burgers for the tasteless bastards,tired of tryin' to make good food only to hear "I don't like that/I can't eat that/ewww,what is that?


well, either you suck as a cook

Or these people are so disconnected from their food that they think it only comes either on a plate to be served, or in a box to be heated

I'm going with the latter, just because you mention they have a proclivity for chain restaurants
 
2012-07-06 10:22:04 PM

serial_crusher: When I was in college, Olive Garden's unlimited soup salad and breadsticks deal was the best thing ever. It was like a 45 minute drive to Roanoke, but we'd make it worthwhile with all the zuppa toscana we'd cram into our gullets. The waiters hated us so much.


We found the recipe for Olive Garden's Zuppa Toscana online and we make it at home quite regularly. However, we use real chicken broth instead of chicken bouillon and real bacon instead of bacon bits. You can do a GIS for the recipe. It's not hard to find.
 
2012-07-06 10:22:54 PM
Ok, that headline had me cracking up. Nice subby.
 
2012-07-06 10:23:38 PM

vudukungfu: Indubitably: I once puked for a couple of days into a bucket black with my blood, you?

I once shiat out a live chervil and a tumor.
You?

I don't always drink homemade sake in a Mexican bar in Baghdad, but when I do, I call in a team of Navy Seals with flame throwers to make a body count real. Then I kill the seals, to insure their loved ones won't be interviewed by Fox News.


I once pooped out something resembling a kidney. I didn't feel anything missing, so I figured I was okay.
 
2012-07-06 10:25:54 PM

Livingroom: why so much hate in this headline? i mean, welcome to fark and all, but wow- somebody is really pissed off that other people like food that they dont.


I see no food mentioned in the headline.
 
2012-07-06 10:26:44 PM
Never been to a Red Lobster. Olive Garden is overpriced for bland food.
 
2012-07-06 10:28:44 PM
I remember Olive Garden from the late 80s/early nineties when it was good. Each store made their sauce on site with, no kidding, tomatos. They also made their pasta and breadsticks fresh out in the front of the restaraunt. The stuff didn't come to the store premade. It was as close to authentic Italian as much of the country would ever see. Then the accountants and capital groups took over. I think a lot of folks out there still see Olive Gaden as the same place they used to go (still in the same building), not knowing everything shows up in a bag from an industrial kitchen.

Also, if you're in Brunswick,Ga and go to Red Lobster for seafood, you choose poorly.
 
2012-07-06 10:28:55 PM
Red Lobster Biscuits:

2 cups Bisquick baking mix
1/2 cup cold water
3/4 cup shredded sharp cheddar cheese
1/4 cup butter
1 teaspoon dried parsley
1/2 teaspoon garlic powder
1/2 teaspoon italian seasoning

Directions:

1
Heat oven to 450.
2
Combine baking mix, water and grated cheese in a bowl.
3
Roll out on a lightly floured surface, until 1 inch thick.
4
Cut biscuits, and place on an ungreased pan.
5
Melt butter and spices together.
6
Brush the biscuits with the butter and bake for 8 to 10 minutes.
 
2012-07-06 10:29:03 PM
Headline of the year.
 
2012-07-06 10:30:03 PM
loonatic112358

Frantic Freddie: ///told the wife the next time they come over I'm makin' burgers for the tasteless bastards,tired of tryin' to make good food only to hear "I don't like that/I can't eat that/ewww,what is that?

well, either you suck as a cook

Or these people are so disconnected from their food that they think it only comes either on a plate to be served, or in a box to be heated

I'm going with the latter, just because you mention they have a proclivity for chain restaurants


I'm a pretty good cook,not in my brother the chef's league,but even my wife says I'm better than anybody in her family.
My family's been in the food business for 3 generations,I like to think I know something about it.
 
2012-07-06 10:31:49 PM

CruJones: A couple of weeks ago we decided to cruise out to Ryan's Steakhouse for dinner...


Classic http://alt.tasteless/. I remember when this was posted, it had to have been around '93 or so. By glub I laughed just as hard back then as I did reading it just now.
 
2012-07-06 10:33:41 PM

Mega Steve: I once pooped out something resembling a kidney. I didn't feel anything missing, so I figured I was okay.


It's a tumor.
 
2012-07-06 10:34:00 PM

alsih2o: Headline of the year.


THIS
 
2012-07-06 10:34:42 PM

the_colonel: I remember Olive Garden from the late 80s/early nineties when it was good. Each store made their sauce on site with, no kidding, tomatos. They also made their pasta and breadsticks fresh out in the front of the restaraunt. The stuff didn't come to the store premade. It was as close to authentic Italian as much of the country would ever see. Then the accountants and capital groups took over. I think a lot of folks out there still see Olive Gaden as the same place they used to go (still in the same building), not knowing everything shows up in a bag from an industrial kitchen.

Also, if you're in Brunswick,Ga and go to Red Lobster for seafood, you choose poorly.


I did not realize they'd changed. I haven't been to an Olive Garden in at least a decade, but I recall them being, while clearly assembly line by the numbers and somewhat bland, distinctly okay. A cut above Denny's, for whatever that is worth.

Red Lobster, however, has always been Long John Silvers with table service and twice the price tag.
 
2012-07-06 10:36:56 PM
Wow, that is a plate full o' butthurt in the headline.
 
2012-07-06 10:36:57 PM

Frantic Freddie: I'm a pretty good cook,not in my brother the chef's league,but even my wife says I'm better than anybody in her family.My family's been in the food business for 3 generations,I like to think I know something about it.


well, i figured it was one of those

/think the reason my wife likes olive garden is she doesn't feel like she needs to be "dressed up" there
//at least 1 good Italian place near the house, and she thinks it's a suit and tie place, it's not it's in a strip mall
 
2012-07-06 10:37:05 PM

I Have The Touch of a Shocked Monkey: I have yet to find an equivalent in quality and utter yumminess to Red Lobster's biscuits, homemade or at a different restaurant.


Fark yeah, Red Lobster's biscuits are a piece of heaven in edible form. I could stuff myself to bursting with just those whenever I go there.
 
2012-07-06 10:38:22 PM

CruJones: A couple of weeks ago we decided to cruise out to Ryan's Steakhouse for dinner...


Good God! I'm glad I took the time to read that hahahaha.
 
2012-07-06 10:39:13 PM

Lsherm: Mugato: Got dam, subby. Did a whop rape you with a crustacean or something?

WOP. W.O.P. Without Official Papers. Kids these days can't even get ethnic slurs right.

This is going to be the funniest post ever if "wop" is part of the Fark Filter.


Actually it's a corruption of the Italian term, "guappo," which means "handsome.".


/False etymology is false.
 
2012-07-06 10:39:40 PM

vudukungfu: Mega Steve: I once pooped out something resembling a kidney. I didn't feel anything missing, so I figured I was okay.

It's a tumor.


lh5.googleusercontent.com
 
2012-07-06 10:41:23 PM

vudukungfu: Indubitably: I once puked for a couple of days into a bucket black with my blood, you?

I once shiat out a live chervil and a tumor.
You?

I don't always drink homemade sake in a Mexican bar in Baghdad, but when I do, I call in a team of Navy Seals with flame throwers to make a body count real. Then I kill the seals, to insure their loved ones won't be interviewed by Fox News.


"ensured"

Mega Steve: vudukungfu: Indubitably: I once puked for a couple of days into a bucket black with my blood, you?

I once shiat out a live chervil and a tumor.
You?

I don't always drink homemade sake in a Mexican bar in Baghdad, but when I do, I call in a team of Navy Seals with flame throwers to make a body count real. Then I kill the seals, to insure their loved ones won't be interviewed by Fox News.

I once pooped out something resembling a kidney. I didn't feel anything missing, so I figured I was okay.


Organ pain?

Pffft, allowed under USA Torture Law?

Okay with you, leader?

I prefer a quick and painless kill, you?

Humane works.

Oort not.

;)
 
2012-07-06 10:43:02 PM
Now, my aged grandmother and her cronies at the retirement home LOVE Olive Garden. And to be fair, the Olive Garden near her house is not a bad restaurant. (We always go there when I visit)

It's not, of course, a good ITALIAN restaurant, or anything like one. But that Olive Garden, at least, is a nice place for old people who want Italian-tasting food but can't handle too much spice, red sauce or garlic. I think that sums up the love for Olive Garden, at least in areas near retirement communities.
 
2012-07-06 10:44:59 PM
ADD a McDONALDS TO THAT AND U HAVE JUST INCREASED THE HEALTHINESS 6 FOLD
 
2012-07-06 10:47:24 PM

SwiftFox: I remember when all the A&W Drive-ins were single businesses.


Good times. Good times. A&W right across the street from the drive-in movies.
 
2012-07-06 10:48:02 PM

fusillade762: CruJones: Olive Garden really isn't that awful. But it's certainly palatable. I wouldn't go there on a date, but for lunch or something? Eh, sure.

I used to work with this young couple and one time the girl was complaining to me about her BF. She said "I wish he'd take me someplace nice for a change. Like Olive Garden."

I had to chuckle.


I took my aunt and her daughter out to eat during a visit not too long ago. They live in the Ozarks so we ate at an Olive Garden in Rogers, Arkansas (or was it Bentonville?).

I kid you not, my aunt called described it as a "fancy restaurant."

\yep, I grew up that poor
\\any place where a waiter or waitress came to your table and took your order was considered a "nice" restaurant
\\\Red Lobster and Olive Garden are downright "fancy" to my hillybilly kin
 
2012-07-06 10:48:45 PM

BronyMedic: davidphogan: Wow, lots of TFers white knight for shiatty chain restaurants. I never saw this before.

Cheddar-Garlic biscuts, dude.

I'll go to Red Lobster, order a 13 buck salad, and eat the shiat out of those.

Olive Garden too. get out of there for less than 12 bucks.


Hell yes. Salad and breadsticks for lunch.
 
2012-07-06 10:48:57 PM

Mugato: Got dam, subby. Did a whop rape you with a crustacean or something?



Nono, it's either "Whoomp", or "Woot"
/there it is
 
2012-07-06 10:51:00 PM

there their theyre: Both of those restaurants taste like eating a salt lick, only marginally better than applebees or chili's.


Actually the southwest egg rolls at Chilis are pretty good.
 
2012-07-06 10:53:03 PM

FizixJunkee: serial_crusher: When I was in college, Olive Garden's unlimited soup salad and breadsticks deal was the best thing ever. It was like a 45 minute drive to Roanoke, but we'd make it worthwhile with all the zuppa toscana we'd cram into our gullets. The waiters hated us so much.


We found the recipe for Olive Garden's Zuppa Toscana online and we make it at home quite regularly. However, we use real chicken broth instead of chicken bouillon and real bacon instead of bacon bits. You can do a GIS for the recipe. It's not hard to find.


I actually add a lot of kale to it, makes it healthier (somewhat) and is quite tasty.
 
2012-07-06 10:54:15 PM

Combustion: You dorks whining about "food hipsters" probably see NOTHING wrong with Coors Light, huh?


If you like that, fine. I'll stick to Yuengling.

I won't hate on ya for ordering a Coors though. Whatever floats your boat.

Beer hipsters can be pretty damn annoying too.
 
2012-07-06 10:57:04 PM
"...creamed salt & boiled fat ..."

Muthafreakin' *TRUTH*, that.

Got dragged to the Ded Lobster kicking & screaming one time in Daytona because my goofy brother in law "really likes seafood". DAYTONA, FL, and he wanted Ded Lobster for his birthday dinner; whatever. So after turning my nose up at most of the menu offerings, I saw that they had shrimp linguine alfredo, and I figured "Hey, how could they possibly screw that up? sounds yummy!" so I ordered it. That was the first time in twenty years I had sent food back after two bites; sure enough, those dumbfarks found a way to ruin one of the most basic recipés since Pasta Putanesca.
It literally tasted like salted lard with soaked cardboard strips and little rubber tires (the scrimps). I actually pushed the plate away from me in revulsion! The other in-laws couldn't believe that I had done that and were offended, but my wife (spoiled on my cooking) took one bite and confirmed the horror. Seriously, it only had the flavors of lard and salt.

NEVER again; I don't give a damn how good their cheese biscuit things are.

/Dad calls "Olive Garden" the "Garlic Garden". I think that's a misnomer: they don't use enough garlic on some things.
 
2012-07-06 10:57:58 PM

fusillade762: I had Olive Garden for dinner tonight, so I'm getting a kick.

Seriously though, the food isn't *that* bad. And with their "Two for $25" deal we got enough food to feed four people for less than $40 (after drinks and tip).

Though I agree the one time I went to a Golden Corral it was pretty awful.


Yeah I have to agree with you there. Golden Corral is pretty bad. My wife's grandparents love the place so if we all go out for a meal we're pretty much forced to go there.

Every time I eat that stuff I get sick as a dog.
 
2012-07-06 11:00:04 PM

Tellingthem: I will always have a special place in my heart for Red Lobster. Me and my sister used to have our birthday dinners there. We grew up in a small town and didn't have much in the way of restaurants. So we would go to the "big city" and eat there. My parents couldn't afford much so this was a big deal for us. I would usually get crab legs my sister would get lobster and we both had Shirley Temples. So even now whenever i see one it reminds me of those dinners.


CSB

Actually, I have similar fond memories of Olive Garden. Growing up poor kinda makes you appreciate stuff like that.
 
2012-07-06 11:03:58 PM
Best headline I've read in a long while.
 
2012-07-06 11:07:28 PM

Gyrfalcon: ms_lara_croft: Add a Golden Corral and you have a trifecta of fail.

No, a Waffle House.


This.

Holy crap, WH is the WORST.

Of course if you enjoy cigarette ashes with your eggs, then by all means...
 
2012-07-06 11:09:25 PM
What the hell is the matter with y'all?
 
2012-07-06 11:09:40 PM

Void_Beavis: Of course if you enjoy cigarette ashes with your eggs, then by all means...


considering how many cities have smoking bans in restaurants, that's not so likely
 
2012-07-06 11:10:32 PM

Kittypie070: What the hell is the matter with y'all?


they're lacking in good nutrition
 
2012-07-06 11:11:57 PM
I don't eat in those places anyway.
 
2012-07-06 11:12:38 PM

Kittypie070: I don't eat in those places anyway.


only the finest of canned foods for you :P
 
2012-07-06 11:14:28 PM
I think this headline is hilarious, true and sad. Neither Red Lobster or Olive Garden serves 'food'.
 
2012-07-06 11:16:34 PM

Void_Beavis: Gyrfalcon: ms_lara_croft: Add a Golden Corral and you have a trifecta of fail.

No, a Waffle House.

This.

Holy crap, WH is the WORST.

Of course if you enjoy cigarette ashes with your eggs, then by all means...


One of my guilty pleasures when forced to drive through the fly-over states is stopping at a random Waffle House and getting a huge pile of hashbrowns scattered all the way and maybe 10 glasses of sweet tea. It makes it so I only have to eat once a day and defecate once a month!
 
2012-07-06 11:17:42 PM

CruJones: Olive Garden really isn't that awful. But it's certainly palatable. I wouldn't go there on a date, but for lunch or something? Eh, sure.

/I eat fast food sometimes too


It "isn't that awful."

If that the best you can say about the place, it really makes me want to go there...

I still don't understand why people pay so much for TV dinners to be served to them.
 
2012-07-06 11:19:33 PM

The_Homeless_Guy: FizixJunkee: serial_crusher: When I was in college, Olive Garden's unlimited soup salad and breadsticks deal was the best thing ever. It was like a 45 minute drive to Roanoke, but we'd make it worthwhile with all the zuppa toscana we'd cram into our gullets. The waiters hated us so much.


We found the recipe for Olive Garden's Zuppa Toscana online and we make it at home quite regularly. However, we use real chicken broth instead of chicken bouillon and real bacon instead of bacon bits. You can do a GIS for the recipe. It's not hard to find.

I actually add a lot of kale to it, makes it healthier (somewhat) and is quite tasty.



Yeah, we add a whole head of kale to it, too. Definitely more than just garnish for us.
 
2012-07-06 11:29:14 PM

LowbrowDeluxe: the_colonel: I remember Olive Garden from the late 80s/early nineties when it was good. Each store made their sauce on site with, no kidding, tomatos. They also made their pasta and breadsticks fresh out in the front of the restaraunt. The stuff didn't come to the store premade. It was as close to authentic Italian as much of the country would ever see. Then the accountants and capital groups took over. I think a lot of folks out there still see Olive Gaden as the same place they used to go (still in the same building), not knowing everything shows up in a bag from an industrial kitchen.

Also, if you're in Brunswick,Ga and go to Red Lobster for seafood, you choose poorly.

I did not realize they'd changed. I haven't been to an Olive Garden in at least a decade, but I recall them being, while clearly assembly line by the numbers and somewhat bland, distinctly okay. A cut above Denny's, for whatever that is worth.

Red Lobster, however, has always been Long John Silvers with table service and twice the price tag.


When I said they made the pasta and breadsticks, I'm not talking just cooking it. They made the semolina dough and ran it through the pasta machine to make their own lasagna noodles, fettuccine etc. They made the dough for the bread too. You could by fresh unbaked breadsticks and fresh made pasta to take home. Now it's just plated Stouffers.
 
2012-07-06 11:35:42 PM
Sysco should open their own restaurant.
 
2012-07-06 11:41:56 PM
God is great, Beer is good and white people are crazy!
 
2012-07-06 11:47:22 PM
The hilarious thing is that if you took a Olive Garden and put another name on it and told Subby it was owned by a nice local couple who use only local produce but actually change nothing else he would probably wander in, enjoy himself, and be recommending it to his friends the next day.

I'll bet Subby is one of those people who spends twice as much for organic food, but not because it's green. No, because it tastes better and is healtheir. Based on all the independent blind testing and scientific evidence. No, wait... none of that actually exists. So then it tastes better because he thinks it does and it's healthier because it must be. That should be reason enough for anyone, right?
 
2012-07-06 11:49:49 PM

CruJones: huge story.


Oh my gosh, my wife and I are cracking up right now. BEST STORY EVER!!!
 
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