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(WFTV Orlando)   Police: Burglar crawls into woman's bed, strikes up conversation   (wftv.com) divider line 41
    More: Florida, WFTV, Semoran Boulevard, burglary  
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5730 clicks; posted to Main » on 06 Jul 2012 at 8:10 AM (2 years ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



41 Comments   (+0 »)
   
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2012-07-06 08:12:40 AM  
"I hope they catch him. He really needs to get caught because he's a psychopath," said the woman.

"He comes into my apartment and talks to me like he's a friend of mine in the middle of the night at four in the morning. That's not a normal person," said the woman.

"He had cologne on he had nice dress slacks on. He's not homeless, mental issues probably," said the woman.


Clearly this woman is a licensed physician who has the training to diagnose such behavior.
 
2012-07-06 08:13:01 AM  
"So... you cum here often?"
 
2012-07-06 08:20:20 AM  
This guy's a genius! The most difficult part of wooing a female is getting her in to bed. He's circumventing the entire thing by seeking out women who are already in bed!
 
2012-07-06 08:20:23 AM  
Do you live here often?

Seriously, tho- question: If he's not breaking in, is he breaking any laws? Sure, he's making people uncomfortable, but if he's not hurting anybody, not stealing anything, and not breaking in, is he breaking any laws? On what grounds can he be arrested and charged?
 
2012-07-06 08:22:04 AM  
Sounds like his girlfriend dumped him and he wants someone to talk with.
 
2012-07-06 08:23:54 AM  
He's doing it wrong
 
2012-07-06 08:25:34 AM  

HAMMERTOE: Do you live here often?

Seriously, tho- question: If he's not breaking in, is he breaking any laws? Sure, he's making people uncomfortable, but if he's not hurting anybody, not stealing anything, and not breaking in, is he breaking any laws? On what grounds can he be arrested and charged?


Trespass? But all he really has to do is claim to the police that he lives there and the occupants are trying to pull a fast one on the cops by evicting him.
 
2012-07-06 08:25:39 AM  

Jacobin: He's doing it wrong


You sure about that? How many different women have you been in bed with over the past couple weeks?
 
2012-07-06 08:28:35 AM  

HAMMERTOE: Do you live here often?

Seriously, tho- question: If he's not breaking in, is he breaking any laws? Sure, he's making people uncomfortable, but if he's not hurting anybody, not stealing anything, and not breaking in, is he breaking any laws? On what grounds can he be arrested and charged?


Trespassing

Assault

Being a farkin weirdo
 
2012-07-06 08:33:11 AM  
Was she a black haired flaminco dancer?

If it was, I can probably guess the guy's name.
 
2012-07-06 08:35:32 AM  

Tricky Chicken: Was she a black haired flaminco dancer?

If it was, I can probably guess the guy's name.


you know she dances while his father plays guitar. She's suddenly beautiful.

/Came for this... sadly.
 
2012-07-06 08:39:19 AM  
media.cmgdigital.com

Forever alone.
 
2012-07-06 08:41:43 AM  

AverageAmericanGuy: Trespass? But all he really has to do is claim to the police that he lives there and the occupants are trying to pull a fast one on the cops by evicting him.


It's not even "trespass" until after they tell him to leave, which he does. And, we're back to square one.
 
2012-07-06 08:42:35 AM  
And, yes, legally, it's not "Trespass" until after they tell him to leave. As an ex-repo man, i know the legality of this very well.
 
2012-07-06 08:43:29 AM  
It sounds like he keep visiting this one woman? Maybe she should lock her door or something?
 
2012-07-06 08:54:36 AM  
only a few blocks from where I used to live. When the police started moving out of my comnplex, I left too.
 
2012-07-06 08:56:18 AM  
Hey Lou, check all optometry shops in the area. Surely only one place has sold only one pair of those square rim glasses.
 
2012-07-06 09:00:12 AM  

GrizzlyPouch: HAMMERTOE: Do you live here often?

Seriously, tho- question: If he's not breaking in, is he breaking any laws? Sure, he's making people uncomfortable, but if he's not hurting anybody, not stealing anything, and not breaking in, is he breaking any laws? On what grounds can he be arrested and charged?

Trespassing

Assault

Being a farkin weirdo


Yea, well, if that third one was against the law, I think most of America would be in Jail by now (or at least all Fark members).
 
2012-07-06 09:04:07 AM  
This happened to the Queen once.
 
2012-07-06 09:05:02 AM  
"Sooo. Whatcha thinkin' about?"
 
2012-07-06 09:06:16 AM  
I've already addressed the subject of "Trespass", what of "Assault"? Doesn't assault require personal violence, or the expressed threat of such? He's not guilty of this either.
 
2012-07-06 09:11:45 AM  

HAMMERTOE: I've already addressed the subject of "Trespass", what of "Assault"? Doesn't assault require personal violence, or the expressed threat of such? He's not guilty of this either.


Somebody comes into your house middle of the night unwelcome what do you anticipate they are expressing? Vacuum cleaner sales? More like rape rape

/just a matter of time before he gets the balls up
 
2012-07-06 09:20:29 AM  

Tricky Chicken


Was she a black haired flaminco dancer?


Flamenco.


We all want somethin' beautiful.
 
2012-07-06 09:20:46 AM  
Just give him a BJ, he'll fall asleep right after.
 
2012-07-06 09:31:11 AM  
FTA: "He comes into my apartment and talks to me like he's a friend of mine in the middle of the night at four in the morning. That's not a normal person," said the woman.

So which one was it: The middle of the night, or four in the morning? That's the important question.
 
2012-07-06 09:33:30 AM  
Look Ma, my picture's in the paper!

I'm famous!

/Pass me a bottle, Mr. Jones
 
2012-07-06 09:53:31 AM  

baronbloodbath: Look Ma, my picture's in the paper!

I'm famous!

/Pass me a bottle, Mr. Jones


Came for a Counting Crows reference... leaving satisfied, but bottle-less

/pass me a bottle
 
2012-07-06 10:20:13 AM  

GrizzlyPouch: /just a matter of time before he gets the balls up


You're assuming things. Every time he was told to leave, he did. He has not committed a single aggressive act.
 
2012-07-06 10:24:40 AM  
THEY COME OUT OF THE BLUE SKY

BUT YOU NEVER KNOW
WHEN THEYRE GONNA GO..

HEY ROMEO
 
2012-07-06 10:27:24 AM  
But did she get burglared?
 
2012-07-06 10:32:12 AM  
well i heard you let somebody get their fingers into you
it's getting cold in california
i guess i'll be leavin soon

DAILY LIGHT FADING
COME AND WASTE ANOHTER YEAR
 
2012-07-06 10:35:02 AM  

HAMMERTOE: And, yes, legally, it's not "Trespass" until after they tell him to leave. As an ex-repo man, i know the legality of this very well.


you're a genius, i can tell. going by your questions and comments you have very little understanding of the basic concepts of breaking and entering much less the difference between standing in someone's driveway and standing in their bedroom. no wonder you're a ex-repo man. bill collector these days?

/trespassers will be violated
 
2012-07-06 10:42:10 AM  

Englebert Slaptyback: Tricky Chicken

Was she a black haired flaminco dancer?


Flamenco.


We all want somethin' beautiful.


Man, I wish I was beautiful.
 
2012-07-06 10:45:12 AM  

reillan: you know she dances while his father plays guitar. She's suddenly beautiful.


Of course, it's silly to be asking for some sort of logic from Counting Crows lyrics, but I've always wondered how the father of Mr. Jones fortuitously arrived just to play guitar for the Flamenco dancer.
 
2012-07-06 11:40:26 AM  

theorellior: reillan: you know she dances while his father plays guitar. She's suddenly beautiful.

Of course, it's silly to be asking for some sort of logic from Counting Crows lyrics, but I've always wondered how the father of Mr. Jones fortuitously arrived just to play guitar for the Flamenco dancer.


It's actually "while her father plays".

media.cmgdigital.com

Anyway, this guy wishes he was someone just a little more funky
 
2012-07-06 01:03:24 PM  
media.cmgdigital.com

"It's a good thing that I have my library card. Why? Because I am totally checking you out!!"
 
2012-07-06 01:52:32 PM  

theorellior: reillan: you know she dances while his father plays guitar. She's suddenly beautiful.

Of course, it's silly to be asking for some sort of logic from Counting Crows lyrics, but I've always wondered how the father of Mr. Jones fortuitously arrived just to play guitar for the Flamenco dancer.


The lead singer is Adam Duritz... he has a friend named Marty Jones, whose father is a flamenco guitarist... something tells me this song is not a piece of fiction :)
 
2012-07-07 04:17:55 AM  
"I hope they catch him. He really needs to get caught because he's a psychopath," said the woman.

No, no, no, a psychopath breaks in for no reason. I break in to talk...


// First thing I thought of...
 
2012-07-07 08:58:26 AM  

Someone_Took_My_Login: "I hope they catch him. He really needs to get caught because he's a psychopath," said the woman.

No, no, no, a psychopath breaks in for no reason. I break in to talk...


// First thing I thought of...


ohhh, nice, Martin...
 
2012-07-07 09:14:09 AM  
"So cum here often?"
 
2012-07-08 01:38:27 AM  
Because the story just wasn't weird enough, I somehow read that as "Police: Burger crawls into woman's bed, strikes up conversation"

/probably should get some food and sleep
 
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