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(Daily Mail)   Woman puts her 'slightly used' soul on eBay for $2,000   (dailymail.co.uk) divider line 127
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10909 clicks; posted to Main » on 06 Jul 2012 at 8:42 AM (2 years ago)   |  Favorite    |   share:  Share on Twitter share via Email Share on Facebook   more»



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2012-07-06 09:36:57 AM
Well, that's kind of sad. When I was at my low, I just went and talked to... you know, friends.
 
2012-07-06 09:37:33 AM
According to the open soul market, that soul isn't worth more than $50.

http://www.freakonomics.com/2012/05/07/soul-possession-a-new-freakono m ics-radio-podcast/
 
2012-07-06 09:37:46 AM

Wasilla Hillbilly: Optimus Primate: >

>enable CSB mode

While in the Navy, there was a "hardcore confirmed athiest" in our division. An good friend of mine would always question the athiest's true commitment to his non-beliefs. Eventually, and close to payday when the athiest was broke, he offered him ten dollars for his soul. Made a contract and everything, which the athiest had to sign in blood. The athiest took the ten dollars, waved it in my friend's face, and called him a fool as he went on his way with "free money".

I'll be damned if it didn't work out EXACTLY like the Bart's Soul episode. After two days, the athiest was back nonchalantly asking about "cancelling the offer, and just returning the ten dollars". He had a dark look to him, and you could see he had been mulling it over a lot and it was eating at him. My friend, who held the contract, is one of those absolutely merciless types and refused - waving the contract in his face and gleefully mocking him and saying how he is now "guaranteed heaven" since he holds two souls...stuff like that. He made the poor bastard BEG for the soul back, and eventually relented after the victim stated that "he was actually agnostic and not athiest" mcuh to the satusfaction of my friend who had then "won".

He sold him his soul back for THIRTY dollars on payday. You shoulda seen the look of relief of the dude's face...he was seriously stressed about it.

I have found through the years that pretty much nobody, even athiests, will sell their soul...."just in case".

Dude, I've sold my soul more times than I can count (first was for a pack of cigarettes as a teen), and have had zero stress or worry about it, ever. It's just silly superstition.


Agreed in general...and well - this was back in the 1980's - a simpler time. I am not a christian, but I would not sell my soul to anyone. Simply for the idea that it symbolically represents one's "inner spirit" and that being willing to sell that core part of yourself (while impossible) represents a willingness to "give up" on that unique energy that makes us what we are. It seems cheap and crass to acknowledge such a sale, on a purely philosophical level...so I would not do it.

I believe in the existence of a "soul spirit" in each of us. It's not something one can truly sell, but the act of selling it would devalue it's importance in my philosophy and would therefore not be cool to do.

I also think the "signing in blood" thing increases the "scare factor" for those willing to complete the deal. It just makes it seem more permanent and binding.
 
2012-07-06 09:38:12 AM

SpectroBoy: 1) It is against ebay rules to sell human body parts

2) If you can not deliver, this is fraud

3) Fugly


that sucks. i wanted to sell my penis for $666
 
2012-07-06 09:40:08 AM

SpectroBoy: 1) It is against ebay rules to sell human body parts
2) If you can not deliver, this is fraud
3) Fugly


It's not a body part.

The contract is the deliverable.

Still waiting for offers.

Has to be enough to motivate me to go to the Post Office, unless you are willing to take electronic delivery of a soul.
 
2012-07-06 09:44:44 AM
see i would have made it a dutch auction. Thereby collecting the moneys of 100 people and getting to keep the universal message soul
 
2012-07-06 09:46:13 AM
The Nightman Cometh?
 
2012-07-06 09:48:17 AM
LIFEFORCE not soul......it's all very scientific.

encrypted-tbn0.google.com

.
 
2012-07-06 09:56:57 AM

Dead for Tax Reasons: I'd sell my soul for a formula one racing car


Maybe you should contact the guys running redbulll F1 about that
 
2012-07-06 09:59:45 AM
Also, she's white, she likely has no soul
 
2012-07-06 10:00:57 AM
I'll sell mine for $75 and a vicodin.
 
2012-07-06 10:05:33 AM

Jon iz teh kewl: see i would have made it a dutch auction. Thereby collecting the moneys of 100 people and getting to keep the universal message soul


entice them in with Free Shipping
 
2012-07-06 10:07:12 AM

Optimus Primate: >

>enable CSB mode

While in the Navy, there was a "hardcore confirmed athiest" in our division. An good friend of mine would always

I have found through the years that pretty much nobody, even athiests, will sell their soul...."just in case".



Hey, could you do me a favour? Do you see that bowl of dicks over there? Could you eat the whole thing, please?
 
2012-07-06 10:09:18 AM
Cheney only drinks the souls of the young.
 
2012-07-06 10:11:07 AM

MisterLoki: I'll sell mine for $75 and a vicodin.


it looks sort of worn down, i got 5 bucks and a Tylenol that fell behind my desk
 
2012-07-06 10:12:57 AM
Despite not receiving any bids for her opening offer, she said she felt encouraged by the number of hits the internet auction site posting had received.

Of course you haven't received any bids. You've priced yourself way out of the market.

i.qkme.me
 
2012-07-06 10:14:02 AM

genner: LIFEFORCE not soul......it's all very scientific.

[encrypted-tbn0.google.com image 160x160]

.


No, LIFEFORCE is a british film Patrick Stewart was in.
 
2012-07-06 10:16:58 AM
genner: LIFEFORCE not soul......it's all very scientific.

[encrypted-tbn0.google.com image 160x160]

.


Shakes tiny fist
 
2012-07-06 10:17:53 AM

Optimus Primate: >

>enable CSB mode

While in the Navy, there was a "hardcore confirmed athiest" in our division. An good friend of mine would always question the athiest's true commitment to his non-beliefs. Eventually, and close to payday when the athiest was broke, he offered him ten dollars for his soul. Made a contract and everything, which the athiest had to sign in blood. The athiest took the ten dollars, waved it in my friend's face, and called him a fool as he went on his way with "free money".

I'll be damned if it didn't work out EXACTLY like the Bart's Soul episode. After two days, the athiest was back nonchalantly asking about "cancelling the offer, and just returning the ten dollars". He had a dark look to him, and you could see he had been mulling it over a lot and it was eating at him. My friend, who held the contract, is one of those absolutely merciless types and refused - waving the contract in his face and gleefully mocking him and saying how he is now "guaranteed heaven" since he holds two souls...stuff like that. He made the poor bastard BEG for the soul back, and eventually relented after the victim stated that "he was actually agnostic and not athiest" mcuh to the satusfaction of my friend who had then "won".

He sold him his soul back for THIRTY dollars on payday. You shoulda seen the look of relief of the dude's face...he was seriously stressed about it.

I have found through the years that pretty much nobody, even athiests, will sell their soul...."just in case".


Let's all point and laugh at the guy who can't spell atheist.
 
2012-07-06 10:18:38 AM
You can't make shiat up like this
 
2012-07-06 10:20:42 AM
Interested buyer.....

robpetkau.files.wordpress.com

Some strings attached though.
 
2012-07-06 10:21:44 AM
I think it would be awesome if the buyer showed up with a Voodoo priest who collected some hair, a bit of blood and performed a ritual to bind her soul in a jar.

You say the buyer isn't getting anything tangible, but I'll bet the look on the now souless girl would be priceless.

/a soul jar would make a great mantle knicknack.
 
2012-07-06 10:23:38 AM

Whiskey Dickens: Optimus Primate: >

>enable CSB mode

While in the Navy, there was a "hardcore confirmed athiest" in our division. An good friend of mine would always

I have found through the years that pretty much nobody, even athiests, will sell their soul...."just in case".


Hey, could you do me a favour? Do you see that bowl of dicks over there? Could you eat the whole thing, please?


Are they wrapped in bacon and covered in carmelized brown sugar? If so, ok.
 
2012-07-06 10:25:55 AM

browntimmy: Even if there was a soul who's dumb enough to think a piece of paper saying, "Here's my soul" is actually valid? Oh right, people who believe in souls.


So you'll sell me your soul too? Hoo boy. I'll have a backup soul to my backup soul.

BurnShrike: I dunno. Make me an offer. How much does a soul go for these days? Mine's in better condition than hers. I'd like to be able to get myself something nice with the money.


Oh, come on, now. You don't even believe you have one. I'm just asking you to sign a piece of paper and mail it back to me. That can't be worth more than ten bucks.
 
2012-07-06 10:29:59 AM
upload.wikimedia.org
 
2012-07-06 10:37:08 AM

busy chillin': [upload.wikimedia.org image 220x313]


Did he sell it down at the Cossroads?

/yeah, I can cross-joke FARK threads....
 
2012-07-06 10:38:51 AM
www.inquisitr.com
 
2012-07-06 10:40:57 AM

Lando Lincoln: BurnShrike: I dunno. Make me an offer. How much does a soul go for these days? Mine's in better condition than hers. I'd like to be able to get myself something nice with the money.

Oh, come on, now. You don't even believe you have one. I'm just asking you to sign a piece of paper and mail it back to me. That can't be worth more than ten bucks.


That's not how it works. The value of something isn't set by the owner of the item. It's set by the market, which is what people are willing to pay for it.

I may not believe that a Van Gogh painting is worth millions, but people are willing to pay that much for it, so that's what it's worth.

Whether I believe I have one or not is beside the point. What are people willing to pay for it? You've offered up $10, but I can probably do better than that somewhere else. So I'll hold on to it until I get a better offer.

Besides, the shipping costs alone would be more than that.

/my soul sounds fat
 
2012-07-06 10:41:50 AM
unrealitymag.com
 
2012-07-06 10:47:34 AM

95BV5: Let's all point and laugh at the guy who can't spell atheist.


He's the athiest ath there ever was!
 
2012-07-06 10:48:53 AM

95BV5: Optimus Primate: >

>enable CSB mode

While in the Navy, there was a "hardcore confirmed athiest" in our division. An good friend of mine would always question the athiest's true commitment to his non-beliefs. Eventually, and close to payday when the athiest was broke, he offered him ten dollars for his soul. Made a contract and everything, which the athiest had to sign in blood. The athiest took the ten dollars, waved it in my friend's face, and called him a fool as he went on his way with "free money".

I'll be damned if it didn't work out EXACTLY like the Bart's Soul episode. After two days, the athiest was back nonchalantly asking about "cancelling the offer, and just returning the ten dollars". He had a dark look to him, and you could see he had been mulling it over a lot and it was eating at him. My friend, who held the contract, is one of those absolutely merciless types and refused - waving the contract in his face and gleefully mocking him and saying how he is now "guaranteed heaven" since he holds two souls...stuff like that. He made the poor bastard BEG for the soul back, and eventually relented after the victim stated that "he was actually agnostic and not athiest" mcuh to the satusfaction of my friend who had then "won".

He sold him his soul back for THIRTY dollars on payday. You shoulda seen the look of relief of the dude's face...he was seriously stressed about it.

I have found through the years that pretty much nobody, even athiests, will sell their soul...."just in case".

Let's all point and laugh at the guy who can't spell atheist.


Meh, like you never made one single typo in your entire life.
 
2012-07-06 10:49:33 AM
www.killmydaynow.com
 
2012-07-06 10:51:25 AM

BurnShrike: Lando Lincoln: BurnShrike: I dunno. Make me an offer. How much does a soul go for these days? Mine's in better condition than hers. I'd like to be able to get myself something nice with the money.

Oh, come on, now. You don't even believe you have one. I'm just asking you to sign a piece of paper and mail it back to me. That can't be worth more than ten bucks.

That's not how it works. The value of something isn't set by the owner of the item. It's set by the market, which is what people are willing to pay for it.

I may not believe that a Van Gogh painting is worth millions, but people are willing to pay that much for it, so that's what it's worth.

Whether I believe I have one or not is beside the point. What are people willing to pay for it? You've offered up $10, but I can probably do better than that somewhere else. So I'll hold on to it until I get a better offer.

Besides, the shipping costs alone would be more than that.

/my soul sounds fat


The point is, you're chickening out. Either put up or shut up, atheist. I'll send you the document with a nice pen for you to sign with and a postage-paid return envelope. You can keep the pen as a memento.
 
2012-07-06 11:02:23 AM
Too much walking shoes worn thin
too much trippin' and my soul's worn thin
Time to catch her ride it leaves today,
her name is what it means...
 
2012-07-06 11:06:21 AM
If that's what she's asking for her Soul, I don't want to know about her Funk.
 
2012-07-06 11:09:18 AM

Lando Lincoln: The point is, you're chickening out. Either put up or shut up, atheist. I'll send you the document with a nice pen for you to sign with and a postage-paid return envelope. You can keep the pen as a memento.


I'm not "chickening out". I'm holding out for a price that's reasonable.

Will you sell me your car for $10? No? Chickening out, are ya? Or do you just think it's worth more than that?

So if you think souls are real, offer me a reasonable sum for mine. Either put up or shut up.
 
2012-07-06 11:09:26 AM
cdn.straightfromthea.com
 
2012-07-06 11:14:18 AM

Lando Lincoln: The point is, you're chickening out. Either put up or shut up, atheist. I'll send you the document with a nice pen for you to sign with and a postage-paid return envelope. You can keep the pen as a memento.


How about $1 for the soul, $24 S&H?
 
2012-07-06 11:17:08 AM

Optimus Primate: Whiskey Dickens: Optimus Primate: >

>enable CSB mode

While in the Navy, there was a "hardcore confirmed athiest" in our division. An good friend of mine would always

I have found through the years that pretty much nobody, even athiests, will sell their soul...."just in case".


Hey, could you do me a favour? Do you see that bowl of dicks over there? Could you eat the whole thing, please?

Are they wrapped in bacon and covered in carmelized brown sugar? If so, ok.


THis can be arranged, but it'll cost you fifty bucks extra.
 
2012-07-06 11:19:11 AM
First day you walk on the job that is to be your career, you have sold it.
 
2012-07-06 11:24:32 AM

DreamSnipers: First day you walk on the job that is to be your career, you have sold it.


You sound like a philosophy major with piles of debt.
 
2012-07-06 11:25:44 AM
The joke is on you! I am only selling my 魄 not my 魂.
 
2012-07-06 11:29:24 AM
I just thought of something. I should write some free app that has, "Agreeing to these terms gives me your soul, which will be fully transferrable" in the EULA.

I bet I could make a bunch of money reselling souls. You could buy yours back, buy one as a gag gift. Collect them and trade them.
 
2012-07-06 11:30:30 AM

DreamSnipers: First day you walk on the job that is to be your career, you have sold it.


NO I'm renting it.
I take my soul back when they stop paying me.
 
2012-07-06 11:33:36 AM

BMFPitt: I just thought of something. I should write some free app that has, "Agreeing to these terms gives me your soul, which will be fully transferrable" in the EULA.

I bet I could make a bunch of money reselling souls. You could buy yours back, buy one as a gag gift. Collect them and trade them.


Make sure it's in tiny print somewhere in the middle of a long terms and conditions agreement. No one reads those anyways before clicking agree.
 
2012-07-06 11:35:04 AM

BMFPitt: I just thought of something. I should write some free app that has, "Agreeing to these terms gives me your soul, which will be fully transferrable" in the EULA.

I bet I could make a bunch of money reselling souls. You could buy yours back, buy one as a gag gift. Collect them and trade them.


Been done. Gamestation changed their EULA for an April 1st prank. They collected 7,500 souls before people started to notice.

/they relinquished rights later.
 
2012-07-06 11:35:06 AM

Optimus Primate: I have found through the years that pretty much nobody, even athiests, will sell their soul...."just in case".


Superstition is a hard habit to shake.

Say that out loud now or you will have bad luck all day.

/saying "that" doesn't count
 
2012-07-06 11:35:35 AM

CapeFearCadaver: BMFPitt: I just thought of something. I should write some free app that has, "Agreeing to these terms gives me your soul, which will be fully transferrable" in the EULA.

I bet I could make a bunch of money reselling souls. You could buy yours back, buy one as a gag gift. Collect them and trade them.

Make sure it's in tiny print somewhere in the middle of a long terms and conditions agreement. No one reads those anyways before clicking agree.


I could probably bold it right at the top, and 90% of people would agree.
 
2012-07-06 11:46:40 AM
Boris S. Wort

Optimus Primate: I have found through the years that pretty much nobody, even athiests, will sell their soul...."just in case".

Superstition is a hard habit to shake.

Say that out loud now or you will have bad luck all day.


It is bad luck to be superstitious. However, I am a little stitious.

Also, a liquor store I went to had a little demon tchotchke at the counter with a sign that said "touch me for one year of bad luck"

I almost did it...but then as said...I didn't touch it "just in case". The guy said no one had touched in over a month. Belief is a funny thing.
 
2012-07-06 11:50:47 AM

Optimus Primate: >

>enable CSB mode

While in the Navy, there was a "hardcore confirmed athiest" in our division. An good friend of mine would always question the athiest's true commitment to his non-beliefs. Eventually, and close to payday when the athiest was broke, he offered him ten dollars for his soul. Made a contract and everything, which the athiest had to sign in blood. The athiest took the ten dollars, waved it in my friend's face, and called him a fool as he went on his way with "free money".

I'll be damned if it didn't work out EXACTLY like the Bart's Soul episode. After two days, the athiest was back nonchalantly asking about "cancelling the offer, and just returning the ten dollars". He had a dark look to him, and you could see he had been mulling it over a lot and it was eating at him. My friend, who held the contract, is one of those absolutely merciless types and refused - waving the contract in his face and gleefully mocking him and saying how he is now "guaranteed heaven" since he holds two souls...stuff like that. He made the poor bastard BEG for the soul back, and eventually relented after the victim stated that "he was actually agnostic and not athiest" mcuh to the satusfaction of my friend who had then "won".

He sold him his soul back for THIRTY dollars on payday. You shoulda seen the look of relief of the dude's face...he was seriously stressed about it.

I have found through the years that pretty much nobody, even athiests, will sell their soul...."just in case".


Joke might be on your friend. I should imagine the great sky fairy takes a pretty dim view on people trading in souls. Kind of thing that satan is supposed to do.
 
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